any one save more carefully because they know they wont receive an inheritance?

[bumbershoot]

...unless there is a long lost generous relative that we haven't met yet, lol.

Did you see this? Can you imagine?

 

[DisMN]

Did you see this? Can you imagine?

Wow! What a mean old fart!!

 

[torinsmom]

Wow! What a mean old fart!!

Maybe his relatives were a pain in the rear end who were just counting the days until he died. At least he saved it for his future descendants to eventually get. The way I see it, it was his money, and his decision to say who got(or didn't get) it.

 

[crisi]

Maybe his relatives were a pain in the rear end who were just counting the days until he died. At least he saved it for his future descendants to eventually get. The way I see it, it was his money, and his decision to say who got(or didn't get) it.

Or maybe he had seen what frequently happens with second and third generation wealth - it sometimes fuels lives of dissipation. His immediate descendents had to make it on their own - just like people not born with wealthy fathers.

 

[ConnieB]

Did you see this? Can you imagine?

Yeah, but my inlaws are really into geneology....so they've traced their families back to pre-America times and my family pretty far back too. Sadly, we haven't found any holdouts, lol. Closest we've come to even remotely famous is a cousin many many times removed from Abe Lincoln.

Ahh well, so long as I can keep affording trips to Disney I'm a happy camper.

 

[ConnieB]

Many very wealthy people who don't want to leave it to their children will donate everything to charity (who was that lady that died a few years back in New York and left tens of millions to her dogs and their care...was it Leona Helmsley?). I guess these folks should be very happy Great Great Grandpa wasn't a pet lover, lol.

 

[bettymae1121]

It's funny, I know for a fact I'll inherit, and have a pretty good idea as to the amount, but it hasn't changed the way we spend/save at all. At most, I'm "counting" on it to fund college for our children, should we ever manage to have any. Well still save for college on our own, but probably not as aggresively as we would otherwise.

In my case, my father has more money than he'd care to spend. On top of that, he has LTC insurance so nursing care, if needed, is covered. He also has a large umbrella insurance policy, so if he's sued for something (causes a car accident, for example) his assets are protected as well. My father has shared with my brothers and me his approximate worth and gave each of us a copy of the will and trust paperwork. When it comes to finances, everyone in my immediate family are pretty open about things, for us having this info is normal! Even so, other than a vague notion of using it for my (future) kids college, we operate as if we won't get anything.

As for DH, he's an only child but his mother doesn't have much, and DH is convinced she's left it all to the church in any case. I think it's a moot point, whatever assets she does have will likely go towards medical/nursing care, as she doesn't have insurance for that sort of thing and between her health history and her fear of doctors (she ignores all medical symptoms and refuses treatment even for simple things like high blood preasure), I think that's going to be the likely outcome - which is fine, it's her money it SHOULD go to her care!

 

[Pigeon]

If there's much to inherit, that would be lovely, but to count on it, no way.

My older sister once expressed the idea many years ago, that she thought she'd inherit a bunch from my father to help with her children's Ivy League education. The rest of us were never able to figure that one out, since my father was only in his late sixties when her kids went to school, and he's now 88 and going strong. He and his second wife have enjoyed their retirements, not extravagantly, but comfortably, and I doubt there will be much left.


My ILs are also in their late 80s. They lost a lot when the stock market went south, and my know it all BIL convinced them to turn their paper loss into a real loss. If they'd left it alone, they'd have gotten pretty much all of it back. I don't think there will be too much left there, either, although if you'd asked me before they pulled out of the market, I'd have expected we would end up inheriting a meaningful sum. Just shows that you cannot count on anything.

 

[beansmom]

my family ain't gotta pot nor a window.

dh, otoh, comes from a family where there was and is money. He works for what he has but expects to inherit some sum when his mother passes (through a trust established by his grandmother). We have no clue how much. We will be grateful for whatever it is and spend it accordingly, whether it will fund a nice vacation or payoff our house.

I agree a person needs to work for what they get and never depend upon someone else's generosity. How many people have left money to a charity? Or church? Or their cat Fluffy??

 

[Handbag Lady]

We're not getting anything and I'll have to work until I'm 102 to retire.



I'm hedging my bets on a long-lost and deceased relative. It happened to my mother. A distant cousin passed away and she was contacted by lawyers, etc. She ended up with a nice stash of cash. Only, she didn't stash it and it is well spent now.

 

[Disney Doll]

DH's parents died young...they were only 69 and died within 9 months of each other. We got osme money from them....enough ot do a nice renovationon our houe that it really needed and we both felt that they would have been happy with us using their money to do something sensible like that, rather than blowing it on a big trip or something. It was very generous of them and I am quite grateful that we got that.

My parents are still alive, in their mid-80's and doing OK. They still live in their own home, are relatively healthy (although starting to slow down). My theory about other peoples' money is just that...it's other peoples' money and therefore thier sto do with what they wish.

DH& I work hard, save fairly well, have some retirement savings etc. so I think we'll be OK.

 

[C.Ann]

Do people really do that? Live their lives - and plan their retirement - based on the outside chance that they "might" receive an inheritance?

Do they not realize - that for any number of reasons - all of a persons assets could literally be gone in the blink of an eye?

Wow.. That's a scary concept..

 

[travelbug]

The concept of "inheritance" has never really been on my radar screen. That isn't going to happen, so I've not ever given it much thought.

 

[MSSANDRA]

I have lost both of my parents in the last few years. Before that time, it NEVER even crossed my mind to plan our lives around what they might leave us???? They often made comments about wanting to be sure they left us (one sister and I) something. I knew there was money there even after my dad had a long stay in a very high end nursing home. Reality is, the inheritance really did help us to become much more secure and in fact debt free, but I had a very had time using the money my parents had worked sooo hard for all those years. Yes, it was a blessing but I would trade it all in a second to have them back.

 

[CTdiznymom]

I have lost both of my parents in the last few years..... Yes, it was a blessing but I would trade it all in a second to have them back.

 

[Family Fun Mom]

I come from a very blue collar background. Inheritances are rare. I've never even thought about it.

 

[Tink-n-MrIncredible]

I have lost both of my parents in the last few years. Before that time, it NEVER even crossed my mind to plan our lives around what they might leave us???? They often made comments about wanting to be sure they left us (one sister and I) something. I knew there was money there even after my dad had a long stay in a very high end nursing home. Reality is, the inheritance really did help us to become much more secure and in fact debt free, but I had a very had time using the money my parents had worked sooo hard for all those years. Yes, it was a blessing but I would trade it all in a second to have them back.[/QUOTE]

This made me cry Money means nothing.

 

[dvcgirl]

According to a Federal Reserve study, only 8% of all Americans receive an inheritance of any kind. And most of them will receive less than $25,000. Only 2% receive more than 100K.

Based on those numbers.....I wouldn't factor an inheritance into my financial plan. We've told our parents again and again to enjoy their retirement years. This isn't an issue on my side of the family, but my husband has a brother and he and his children are financial leaches who would positively bleed my in-laws dry given the chance. Forget the inheritance, we were concerned that if they continued to fund these people that they'd run out of money.

It got to the point where my husband, who is 11 years younger than his brother, had to step in and have a "sit down" with his brother, niece and nephew. He told them that the bank of "G&G" (grandma and grandpa) is closed......and to STOP the nonsense.

At 54, 28 and 24 years old, they're just going to have to figure out this money thing. And trust me, it's not as if we haven't helped them either....to the tune of 10s of thousands of dollars. They really tug on my in-laws heart strings though. We bought them a couple of books about setting boundaries with adult children and grandchildren, and that seems to be helping.

They don't call it "personal" finance for nothing.

 

[nykelly]

Not getting anything here either! Well I did ask for the kitchen table because it had many memories of happier times when everyone got along. That being said there are days I feel like why in the world did I want the thing. When my oldest was young my mom was able to help with babysitting but I made sure to pay her due to jealous siblings. Her health failed and was not able to be there for my other 2 kids. My mom has been in a nursing home now 4 years and my youngest will be 5. Their home/trailer will go up for tax auction or be taken from the state for her care, which I think is fair. It costs over $6,000 for her care at the NH a month. I help her out by buying some groceries here and there since she hates their food and I also pay her phone bill, buy clothes etc. My dad passed a year ago and he was also in the nursing home and even though his funeral was paid for I still had the expenses of the flowers for my mom and family and housing everyone here for the funeral which was about $1,000. My mom's final expenses are not fully paid for so I will count on that bill. My mom has really been on my case about coming to live with me lately to a point where I don't even feel like talking to her much anymore. I work full time in a stressful job and have 3 kids and a DH. My parents never did anything for their parents and barely for us. If they did their were always strings attached. Sometimes I feel guilty she has her good moments where I think I could maybe take care of her but she is sick so often and she is also Bipolar that I think it would get the best of me. I am a nurse so I am trained to take care of her but I would never have a break. My mom has spent so many years making her kids fight with each other so she could be #1 in their eyes that no one works together to help. If there were a system that would help more so I didn't have to work and I could stay home with her to care for her I might consider it but they would rather pay for her to be in the NH and I am a major earner in the family and can't afford not to work. The guilt I feel sometimes is awful. So from my standpoint it would be great to have parents that helped but I would consider yourself lucky if they didn't need help themselves. Don't get me wrong I loved my dad and love my mom but it is stressful. Thankful my mom is still here though for as long as I have her. Now I am the one who sounds Bipolar!!! lol! If you ever have dealt with anyone like this you will understand.
Thanks for listening!
Wanted to add my Dad always worked 2 jobs and raised 7 kids of their own and adopted 2 more without a HS education. We were not poor by all means but there wasn't alot of extras. I totally respect how much they gave up to raise all of us without assistance of any kind. He was a hard working man and my mom was a stay at home mom which in itself was hard. I just wished my siblings could see that it is my mom's illness that has caused so much problems and have some kind of feeling of obligation to help them out as I do. Oh well we all have our own issues to deal with.

Kelly

 

[n2mm]

My parents are spending mine and I'm happy to see them enjoying retirement.

My husband and I have already saved enough for our retirement so I'm not looking for anything from anyone else.

I hope our children (youngest is 30) aren't expecting us to leave our savings to them. We plan to enjoy ourselves.

You can add me to this list. I'm retired and having a good time!