any experience dealing with a canceled wedding?

[Tigge50447]

We had to cancel our wedding. we 1st tried to reschedule due to his lack of finances. But then he wouldn't pick a date to actually reschedule. It was orginally March 20th 2009. I then rescheduled to January 2010. So now the whole thing is canceled and we are no longer together. I paided for 75% of my dress which is in and I'm not sure I want to pick it up or lose the money. I had to call all the vendors even through he promised to help take care of cleaning up the mess. It's been a month and I think about it all the time still. His job was not doing well and he decided not to do anything about it. Even though we talked about him getting a pt job or even a different job. I let him live rent free for a month so he could get out from some bills. I also found out he used the $1200 his dad gave us for the wedding to pay his monthly bills instead of the DJ.

I know I should just move on and not look back but it stinks.... anyone else gone throught this.

I am going to disney on March 20th our wedding date figured I should be at the happiest play on earth.

 

[robinb]

We had to cancel our wedding. we 1st tried to reschedule due to his lack of finances. But then he wouldn't pick a date to actually reschedule. It was orginally March 20th 2009. I then rescheduled to January 2010. So now the whole thing is canceled and we are no longer together. I paided for 75% of my dress which is in and I'm not sure I want to pick it up or lose the money. I had to call all the vendors even through he promised to help take care of cleaning up the mess. It's been a month and I think about it all the time still. His job was not doing well and he decided not to do anything about it. Even though we talked about him getting a pt job or even a different job. I let him live rent free for a month so he could get out from some bills. I also found out he used the $1200 his dad gave us for the wedding to pay his monthly bills instead of the DJ.

I know I should just move on and not look back but it stinks.... anyone else gone throught this.

I am going to disney on March 20th our wedding date figured I should be at the happiest play on earth.

I am sorry that you have to go through this. It seems like you are getting out just in time.

Did he agree to deal with the vendors when the wedding was just postponed or after you broke up? It stinks that you seem to be left holding the bag. I would keep careful records of all the money you need to spend on this canceled wedding and you may be able to sue him for his half depending on the circumstances of the break up.

 

[littleteapot]

I am sorry that you have to go through this. It seems like you are getting out just in time.

No advice, just and agreeing that you probably dodged a bullet.

 

[mrsv98]

We had to cancel our wedding. we 1st tried to reschedule due to his lack of finances. But then he wouldn't pick a date to actually reschedule. It was orginally March 20th 2009. I then rescheduled to January 2010. So now the whole thing is canceled and we are no longer together. I paided for 75% of my dress which is in and I'm not sure I want to pick it up or lose the money. I had to call all the vendors even through he promised to help take care of cleaning up the mess. It's been a month and I think about it all the time still. His job was not doing well and he decided not to do anything about it. Even though we talked about him getting a pt job or even a different job. I let him live rent free for a month so he could get out from some bills. I also found out he used the $1200 his dad gave us for the wedding to pay his monthly bills instead of the DJ.

I know I should just move on and not look back but it stinks.... anyone else gone throught this.

I am going to disney on March 20th our wedding date figured I should be at the happiest play on earth.

It hurts but you are most likely better off. In terms of the dress, pick it up and then list it on eBay to get some of your money back.

 

[theycallmered]

My brother in law's ex-fiance ran away to LA to become a model about four months before their wedding date. From what I understand, she came from a sort of whacko/crazy/unstable family, because of this and a few other reasons, my in-laws and my brother in law were paying for the majority of the wedding including so much as her bridal gown.

With regards to the various vendors for the wedding, all deposits have been lost. A few of the places (like the hall) had the policies that if you were to use their services within a year then you would not lose your money. However once it became obvious that she was not coming back (evident through the multiple facebook pics with her and a semi-popular comedian) it became understood that most of the money put towards the wedding was lost.

My mother-in law did consider selling the bridal gown through a consignment shop but found that she would be setting herself up for loosing a lot of money by doing it that way. From the few shops that she talked to the system seemed to be set up this way:

The shop takes the sticker price of the dress and slashes it in half. It does not matter if the dress has not been worn.
Once the dress is sold the shop takes half of the sale and you, the former owner of the dress, take the other portion.
In the end you only get one quarter of the retail price back in your pocketbook.

My mother in law thought about selling the dress on ebay or on craigslist but the dress that the ex-fiance picked out is so unique (all lace, low cut, with a fishtail/mermaid style/fit) that unless someone was looking for that particular dress in that particular size it would be very unlikely that someone would buy it.

My in-laws and my brother in law did talk to a lawyer (and I also talked to my brother who is an attorney) about possibly suing her in order to recuperate some costs. Everyone stated that it would be a difficult to do so due to fact that she was in a different state and simply because of the nature of the case.


Good luck with everything. Not just the financial aspect of it, but also the emotional aspect of it. Having this sort of thing happen to you can really shake you to your core.