am i overreacting?

[lilmissbehaved]

Thank you all for your imput... I actually really do appreciate it, even those of you who disagree with me sending my daughter..

I just wanted to add real quick that I *DO* know that my daughter comes first- even when I have a busy day at work or something else I'd rather be doing.... I NEVER put myself first when it comes to my kids, and I wouldn't have taken her if she was the slightest bit sick. 10 minutes after they took her temp she didn't have a fever anymore....

I don't want my kids sitting at a desk next to a sick kid either!

I totally understand the policy and I really would have been OK if the lady pulled me aside and explained the situation calmly with a little bit of tact .. really; Other than staring at me like i was an axe murderer

Anyway, Thank you.. I'll try to calm down about it.

 

[KiKi Mouse]

Our daycare has the same policy. 24 hours of being fever free.
My SIL is a daycare worker and I know workers get frustrated with parents who send their sick kids to daycare. The rule is there to protect all the kids from catching stuff.

As a parent with a child in daycare I would prefer parents stick to this rule so that it reduces the chance of my child getting sick or bringing stuff home.

The ear infection may be a secondary infection to whatever virus your child has.

 

[Wishing on a star]

I totally understand the policy and I really would have been OK if the lady pulled me aside and explained the situation calmly with a little bit of tact .. really; Other than staring at me like i was an axe murderer

Anyway, Thank you.. I'll try to calm down about it.

 

[3prettyprincesses]

Thank you all for your imput... I actually really do appreciate it, even those of you who disagree with me sending my daughter..

I just wanted to add real quick that I *DO* know that my daughter comes first- even when I have a busy day at work or something else I'd rather be doing.... I NEVER put myself first when it comes to my kids, and I wouldn't have taken her if she was the slightest bit sick. 10 minutes after they took her temp she didn't have a fever anymore....

I don't want my kids sitting at a desk next to a sick kid either!

I totally understand the policy and I really would have been OK if the lady pulled me aside and explained the situation calmly with a little bit of tact .. really; Other than staring at me like i was an axe murderer

Anyway, Thank you.. I'll try to calm down about it.

I think I understand now...you're peeved at how she treated you and your DD. Not that she was enforcing the 24 hour policy. Yes, she should've been kinder, I agree with you. When I was working, I always made a point to happily greet each child, especially at a young age like your DD since some of them have trouble leaving mom or dad.

 

[JessicaR]

Her temp was checked in front of you and read 99 - they didn't give her medication right? Is 99 even considered a fever? Medline says:

A child has a fever when the temperature is at or above one of these levels:

100.4 °F (38 °C) measured in the bottom (rectally)
99.5 °F(37.5 °C) measured in the mouth (orally)
99 °F (37.2 °C) measured under the arm (axillary)

I understand the 24 hour rule and I'm all for it! - but you took her to the doctor - ear infection not contagious - got a doctors note. And, did she really have a fever to begin with?

I guess its a judgement call and ultimately they get to decide.

 

[lilmissbehaved]

I think I understand now...you're peeved at how she treated you and your DD. Not that she was enforcing the 24 hour policy

exactly!!! A simple "We don't allow for exceptions even with doctors notes; sorry".. really would have made me walk away with a smile on my face and feeling OK with the situation... I totally felt jumped in the parking lot and treated like i was a horrible parent... Plus she ignored my daughter.. so i packed her up back in the car and she was HYSTERICAL crying that she wanted to go in.. Just left a bad taste in my mouth for the teacher... I can respect the policy & have NEVER taken either of my kids to school w/ a fever... I just honestly thought with a note & some antibotic pumped in her for it that it would have been OK. I know they deal with some crazy parents so I'm going to try to cut them some slack.. but seriously... Just explain it to me.. Listen to me.. ask me how she's feeling.. not stare at me like i'm a nutjob!

 

[RainbowBrite]

Sorry OP, but I was an Assistant Teacher for nearly 2 years in a daycare, and we HAD to abide by the 24 Fever Free rule. The center could get in trouble if they did not follow that rule.

 

[JessicaR]

I think I understand now...you're peeved at how she treated you and your DD. Not that she was enforcing the 24 hour policy. Yes, she should've been kinder, I agree with you. When I was working, I always made a point to happily greet each child, especially at a young age like your DD since some of them have trouble leaving mom or dad.

Ahh if thats the issue I agree. No reason to be rude.

 

[AKL_Megs]

I know you said YOU felt jumped, but perhaps that teacher felt just AS jumped. She hadn't even had a chance to get in and get herself settled before you were begging for an exception. I can see the teachers perspective.

I totally understand, it SUCKS that she couldn't have excused herself, got settled, and then called you in an office, I DO agree with you there. And, heck, it wouldn't have hurt to shoot a smile and a hello at your DD.

But like I said, I am sure she was feeling like she had to be defensive, because there you were, IMO in HER eyes, ready for a fight.

Just cut her some slack. Maybe she was having a bad morning already, and you were, unfortunately, the straw that broke the camels back.

If it were ME, I would let it roll of my back.

Glad your DD is feeling better!

 

[luvsJack]

We had the same rule and got the same complaints.

At first we tried the exceptions with a doctors note. We had kids that got sicker during the day and we still had to call their mom to come get them. Or a day or so later we would be sending them home again with something that WAS contagious and find out that they had it all along with the ear infection. I had one mom who kept bringing her child, had an note from the dr. and everything. I called her twice to pick her child up as his fever spiked again. The child ended up with the measles!! From that point on there were absolutely NO exceptions. Fever free for 24 hours and if they had something like measles, chicken pox, etc. we had to have something from the dr. stating when they were no longer contagious and when they could safely come back to the center.

She could have been more tactful but after repeating a rule 500 times, you get a bit hard nosed with it. And sometimes you do tend to ready yourself for a fight because so many times that is what you get.

 

[Wishing on a star]

And sometimes you do tend to ready yourself for a fight because so many times that is what you get.

Yep, I can see that this is a good point... Because, unfortunately, we know that there are a number of 'THOSE parents' out there....

But, having said that, really, as a parent who is not one of 'those parents', I too can say that I have been treated rudely and in an adversarial manner - just because child care professionals/teachers think it is okay to always be 'ready for the fight'.

I don't care if 90% of parents out there are, indeed THOSE parents... I am not, and like the OP, I never appreciated it when I was summarily treated like one.

No excuse for paid professionals to not use tact and professional behavior...

I find the whole 'those parents' excuse to be a very thinly veiled excuse for the 'teachers' attitude and lack of professional tact.

 

[luvsJack]

Yep, I can see that this is a good point... Because, unfortunately, we know that there are a number of 'THOSE parents' out there....

But, having said that, really, as a parent who is not one of 'those parents', I too can say that I have been treated rudely and in an adversarial manner - just because child care professionals/teachers think it is okay to always be 'ready for the fight'.

I don't care if 90% of parents out there are, indeed THOSE parents... I am not, and like the OP, I never appreciated it when I was summarily treated like one.

No excuse for paid professionals to not use tact and professional behavior...

I find the whole 'those parents' excuse to be a very thinly veiled excuse for the 'teachers' attitude and lack of professional tact.

Oh, I do agree. No child care professional nor teacher should treat a parent unprofessionally. Sometimes its just really hard to not show your frustration at something that seems to always be an issue. And it really can be an issue EVERY day. Parents bringing sick kids to daycare is one of the biggest issues that child care professionals have to deal with and it does tend to wear on the nerves.

I learned to have an answer that I could just have memorized and said the same thing everytime. Kept me from showing emotion about it. I also made copies of that page from our handbook and gave it the parent when the child was sent home with fever.

Maybe this teacher is new and just needs to learn how to act "professionally" on the outside and keep what she is really thinking to herself.

 

[ccgirl]

Sorry...I am with the fever free for 24 hours too. Believe me, I think it is very "inconvenient" but it is the rule. Everyday is a busy day at work for me but I know that is the rule. Just because the MD diagnosed the ear infection doesn't mean she also doesn't have some kind of virus. I knew that if I picked my DD up from daycare due to illness she could not go back regardless of how she felt. One day she got sick while eating left over mac & cheese, she wasn't sick, and I still kept her home the next day. I'm glad she's feeling better though.

 

[lilmissbehaved]

I wound up emailing the director and apologized for creating my own drama by not following the policy, and then explained how this could have been handled differently so that I did not feel like a criminal.

I stole quite a few lines from here I feel completely better now that I said something to the daycare. I just felt like it was mishandled.

 

[JessicaR]

I wound up emailing the director and apologized for creating my own drama by not following the policy, and then explained how this could have been handled differently so that I did not feel like a criminal.

I stole quite a few lines from here I feel completely better now that I said something to the daycare. I just felt like it was mishandled.

Glad you are feeling better.

 

[puffkin]

I too would have taken her to school. I also wouldn't have allowed the teacher to make the decision, I would have talked to the director as well for the ultimate decision. My son has a lot of allergy issues and will sometimes get coughs, ear infections, even eye issues (that present as pink eye). Every time I have been called to pick him up and taken him to the doctor and they have confirmed it is allergy related and not contagious (with a note) he has been allowed back in school the next day. Obviously I wouldn't take him if he felt bad.

What I find funny is my daycare center is actually pretty healthy. The kids don't miss a whole lot of school because they are a bit more lenient with their sick policy than other centers. The teachers are also rarely sick. I have friends who go to nearby centers and there are outbreaks of this or that every other week....yet my son's school had a 24 hour stomach flu hit right after Christmas and nothing else this year.

 

[doccoc2002]

I agree fever is a fever(rules are rules)...even if there is a Dr. note. I do think schools should evaluate the fever rule thing though...my DD6 had a girl in her class throw up in class and she was able to come back the next day because there was no fever(should be symptom fre)...TOTALLY wrong!

I would/have kept my children home even if they are feeling fine because I think they need the extra attention and they need to rest!

 

[onyx8]

A fever from an ear infection is not contagious and if you have a note saying so, the child should be allowed back at day care. I would talk to the director, not to a teacher for the final say on the matter.

 

[cats7494]

I wound up emailing the director and apologized for creating my own drama by not following the policy, and then explained how this could have been handled differently so that I did not feel like a criminal.

I stole quite a few lines from here I feel completely better now that I said something to the daycare. I just felt like it was mishandled.

Good for you!

 

[LuvOrlando]

Good for you OP. That 24 hour policy is for the parents who keep their kids home and nurse them back to health without a Dr's in-put. If you bring your child to an MD and that MD determines you child can go back to school because whatever it is isn't contagious they had zero reason to turn you away. I think you were totally treated unfairly and deserve an apology, you probably won't get one because people are just rude that way, but you deserve it.