Am I Being Unreasonable

[Ciciwoowoo]

Former daycare person here... worked in centers only, no home daycare.

Centers can and do expect pay for days the child is sick and unable to attend. Centers are also open every day, with the exception of a potential weather issue, so this is a reasonable demand to make.

Home daycare providers, especially informal ones with children can not expect to make these same demands. While it would have been nice of her to pay you for the day you couldn't watch her child, she certainly is not obligated to do so. She either had to arrange for alternate last minute care for the child or stay home from work.

Now, I do happen to agree with the others here that you were not being paid nearly enough. I would think for a special needs child, $15 an hour would be appropriate. You will want to check out what local daycares charge for before/after school care to determine the going rate in your area.

It is probably just as well that this lady is no longer your client. It sounded as if you had a lot of resentment toward her and she was not a very nice person to work with.

I would caution you to check out the home daycare policy in your area to make sure that any care you provide in the future will be legal. You may want to establish an actual home daycare with the state, which will allow you to take advantage of the different programs offered. In addition, it will provide you with a reputable licensed daycare, and the ability to charge more for your services.

Good luck to you!

 

[DisneyEater]

Is your daycare a registered business? Is it possible she told CPS you were running an "illegal" daycare?

 

[mjkacmom]

Maybe I was wrong here but why should I take my sick and vomitting kids out to drive her son to and from school when they couldn't even get out of bed? HOW is that fair to my kids. I am a babysitter. I am over the missed pay. Moved beyond it. But do not attempt to judge me as a parent because I put my kids health and safety first. His mother insisted on bringing him when my kids had strep. He got it. Passed it back and forth 3 times because she refused to keep her sick child home. So why should I be flamed for my kids being sick. I have 5 kids who were sick, btw. Do you know what it would've been like to take 5 kids out and drive them in a car while they were vomitting and having diarrea? Was that really fair?

I think most people think that you shouldn't have tried to charge her for services you didn't give her, because your kids were sick. Things happen, but it's absurd to think she should pay you for not watching her child.

 

[PEANUT1]

no, there is nothing you can do. She never signed a contract.For your next child, create a clearer contract. It sounded as if she had to pay you if she cancelled, not if you did. You can not expect her to pay when she would be forced to find other daycare for that day. I agree that you were right in cancelling when your child was ill. There are many professionals who do not have sick time. I am a per diem nurse. If I call out sicj, I don't get paid.

 

[MinnieForMe]

Hi:
You are working for about $3.60 a hour (less than minimum wage) with a special needs child plus using your car to transport them. I would have a written contract spelling out your liability if you should get into an accident as well as any personal time along with expected payment. My SIL works with special needs children and if the parents ask her to babysit, she charges $20.00 an hour in Massachusetts.

Call her bluff. She is not going to find someone to take care of this child for that amount! Also, get licensed, have a contract and know the laws in your State.

 

[Arabelle]

Is your daycare a registered business? Is it possible she told CPS you were running an "illegal" daycare?

Since when is it illegal to babysit?

 

[squirrel]

All parents should have a back up plan if the daycare person has to cancel. The parent would still need to find care or not work if it was her child that was sick.

Things happen and you should have a plan.

I wouldn't charge for the day if it was my own child that was sick or I was sick and cancelled looking after someone else's child.

 

[DisneyEater]

Since when is it illegal to babysit?

Different states have different laws about what is babysitting vs. daycare. It can depend on how many kids you are watching or how often you are watching them. Here is one example from Michigan:

http://workathomemoms.about.com/b/2009/09/29/helpful-michigan-mom-accused-of-running-illegal-daycare.htm

The OP should find out what here state laws are on daycare and get licensed if she is running one.

 

[Leajess99]

Different states have different laws about what is babysitting vs. daycare. It can depend on how many kids you are watching or how often you are watching them. Here is one example from Michigan:

http://workathomemoms.about.com/b/2009/09/29/helpful-michigan-mom-accused-of-running-illegal-daycare.htm

The OP should find out what here state laws are on daycare and get licensed if she is running one.

The OP has also stated she has 5 kids of her own therefore she may already exceed adult to child ratio for being a childcare provider especially for one who is taking in special needs children.

 

[squirrel]

One of my sister's neighbours called up licensing and told them she was running a daycare from her house.

Licensing showed up at her door and asked if she was running a daycare. She told them no. Found out that they had a report that there were a lot of toys in the backyard. From that information my sister knew who called as she only has so many neighbours that can see the backyard.

My mom used to have a daycare and my sister got all of her outside toys since she has two children.

Up here in BC you are allowed to have two other children besides your own as a unlicensed (license not required) daycare. If you want more than two children then you need to become licensed.

 

[LauraR]

Maybe I was wrong here but why should I take my sick and vomitting kids out to drive her son to and from school when they couldn't even get out of bed? HOW is that fair to my kids. I am a babysitter. I am over the missed pay. Moved beyond it. But do not attempt to judge me as a parent because I put my kids health and safety first. His mother insisted on bringing him when my kids had strep. He got it. Passed it back and forth 3 times because she refused to keep her sick child home. So why should I be flamed for my kids being sick. I have 5 kids who were sick, btw. Do you know what it would've been like to take 5 kids out and drive them in a car while they were vomitting and having diarrea? Was that really fair?

OP, try not to let ridiculous posts like the one you were responding to get to you. You have no way of predicting when your kids will get sick, so of course you couldn't give the parent advance notice. And you are right, there's no way you could have cared for your 5 sick children while taking care of her child. There have been many PP's making helpful and valid points; the poster you responded to was not one of them.

 

[Arabelle]

Different states have different laws about what is babysitting vs. daycare. It can depend on how many kids you are watching or how often you are watching them. Here is one example from Michigan:

http://workathomemoms.about.com/b/2009/09/29/helpful-michigan-mom-accused-of-running-illegal-daycare.htm

The OP should find out what here state laws are on daycare and get licensed if she is running one.

I misunderstood then. I thought this was her only client.

 

[peanutsmommy10]

she was my only client. I didn't have anyone else but I felt it wasn't reasonable of her to expect me to transport her child to and from school and drag my sick kids with me. I did NOT just want a day off. I understand I had no right to ask for pay, regardless of the contract or not. But I felt she was being unreasonable stating she wanted to bring him still, regardless of my sick children. And that it was MY reponsibility to provide her with a backup in my absence.

 

[peanutsmommy10]

OP, try not to let ridiculous posts like the one you were responding to get to you. You have no way of predicting when your kids will get sick, so of course you couldn't give the parent advance notice. And you are right, there's no way you could have cared for your 5 sick children while taking care of her child. There have been many PP's making helpful and valid points; the poster you responded to was not one of them.

thank you laura. I agree Appreciate your advice.

 

[Maddies Mama]

Maybe I was wrong here but why should I take my sick and vomitting kids out to drive her son to and from school when they couldn't even get out of bed? HOW is that fair to my kids. I am a babysitter. I am over the missed pay. Moved beyond it. But do not attempt to judge me as a parent because I put my kids health and safety first. His mother insisted on bringing him when my kids had strep. He got it. Passed it back and forth 3 times because she refused to keep her sick child home. So why should I be flamed for my kids being sick. I have 5 kids who were sick, btw. Do you know what it would've been like to take 5 kids out and drive them in a car while they were vomitting and having diarrea? Was that really fair?

You can always refuse to watch a sick child. She has walked all over you, I am glad your relationship with her has been severed.

 

[OceanAnnie]

I don't think you were unreasonable at all.

If you were babysitting my kids, I would pay you for the day you called in sick. You have your schedule open to watch my kids. You have made yourself available to me and that means something to me to hold that spot. That's just me. I'd be looking at it over the long haul rather than just the one day.

You were not paid enough.

Have you ended the agreement? It sounds like you did. I wouldn't blame you for that. She didn't treat you very well and she should have had a back up for times like this, knowing you have 5 kids. I know I would have had a back up. Things can happen that are out of your control. I wouldn't like that she didn't respect your family and only thought of herself and her circumstances.

I would look at it as a learning opportunity. Get everything in writing. Lay it all out up front.

 

[hffmnheidi]

I totally echo what others are saying by checking out licensing laws in your state just to protect your butt because you never, ever know what a parent could say or when they could make a report to Child Protective Services.

Call CPS and have them send you a copy of the laws for in home daycare for your own protection and create a strict contract that the parents have to sign and date and keep it in a safe file that you only have access to because you may have to pull that out and point out what parents signed and agreed to.

And check with your insurance agent about coverage if you are taking care of other kids in your house and transporting them because every state and every policy differs. It can't hurt to ask and make sure you are covered just in case of an accident.

And collect payment on Mondays for the week because they might just not show up on payment Fridays. This even happens in daycare facilities all over the place. It's too easy to just not show up on Friday when payment is due.

 

[cornflake]

she was my only client. I didn't have anyone else but I felt it wasn't reasonable of her to expect me to transport her child to and from school and drag my sick kids with me. I did NOT just want a day off. I understand I had no right to ask for pay, regardless of the contract or not. But I felt she was being unreasonable stating she wanted to bring him still, regardless of my sick children. And that it was MY reponsibility to provide her with a backup in my absence.

It's your right to cancel if your kids are sick (though I don't think you should expect to be paid if you cancel - if she cancelled, she should pay, but not if you do), and it may not be reasonable for you to find her an alternative but I can't blame her for being thrown by your cancellation or thinking you'd have a backup plan in place, given you have five kids so it's certainly possible that you'd have emergencies of your own.

She's expecting - and paying by the week (though I agree with everyone, far too little) to have someplace to leave him and when you cancel, her plans, presumably her work schedule, is completely thrown. It's not like you were a pal doing her a favour, hence I can see her being annoyed when you cancel unexpectedly, even if you have good reason.

 

[fortwildernessishome]

It's your right to cancel if your kids are sick (though I don't think you should expect to be paid if you cancel - if she cancelled, she should pay, but not if you do), and it may not be reasonable for you to find her an alternative but I can't blame her for being thrown by your cancellation or thinking you'd have a backup plan in place, given you have five kids so it's certainly possible that you'd have emergencies of your own.

She's expecting - and paying by the week (though I agree with everyone, far too little) to have someplace to leave him and when you cancel, her plans, presumably her work schedule, is completely thrown. It's not like you were a pal doing her a favour, hence I can see her being annoyed when you cancel unexpectedly, even if you have good reason.

I have not read all of this thread......

There is simply no way that the Mother should have "been thrown" by the cancellation!!!!! I think if you decide to use in home day care as opposed to a day care center, then common sense tells you that there will come a day that the babysitter will get sick or something will come up causing a cancellation. Certainly not a common occurance, but it is going to happen at some point. That is why the one who needs to have a back up plan is the Mother NOT the babysitter. If I used a babysitter there is NO WAY I would expect them to come up with a back up plan for me, that is my job! There should have been no annoyance on the part of the Mother, its a risk she took by hiring an at home sitter.......people get sick, its unavoidable.

 

[AZMermaid]

There is simply no way that the Mother should have "been thrown" by the cancellation!!!!! I think if you decide to use in home day care as opposed to a day care center, then common sense tells you that there will come a day that the babysitter will get sick or something will come up causing a cancellation. Certainly not a common occurance, but it is going to happen at some point. That is why the one who needs to have a back up plan is the Mother NOT the babysitter. If I used a babysitter there is NO WAY I would expect them to come up with a back up plan for me, that is my job! There should have been no annoyance on the part of the Mother, its a risk she took by hiring an at home sitter.......people get sick, its unavoidable.

I totally agree. That is the big downside to home daycares. I get her being annoyed, but not to the point where she is super upset and expecting the OP to figure out an alternative for her. It is a risk with home daycares (or really home sitters, since the OP was only watching her child in addition to her own). Especially with the OP having 5 kids, the mother should have had a plan B. I get her being annoyed at the last minute cancel, but it happens and mom should have called up the back-up. which she obviously must not have had.