Alternative to baby "leash"

[twinboysmom]

What exactly did I say that was judgmental????

All I care is that I don't get tripped by the leash (tether, harness, rope... whatever you want to call it). Period.

Honestly I could care less what others do with their children. They are not mine to raise.

I never said mine were like having twins. EVER. They were both toddlers at the same time. Youngest one walked at 9 months old and really had no concept of right and wrong. I allowed her to walk when it was safe and wore her when it wasn't. So if you are keeping track that makes the other 31 months... certainly not a preschooler at not yet three. So yeah... I've had two toddlers... actually a walking infant and a toddler at the same time. NO ~ not not two two year olds.... but two toddlers which was the post I quoted. Perhaps you are confused because the example I gave was of the time I traveled ALONE with two small ones. We had many trips with the two little ones and now harness, leash needed for them. For OUR family.

Honestly.... the only time I noticed a kid leashed/tethered/harnessed was when my then 4 year old asked why another kid was being walked like a dog. She was 4 and didn't know that was an insulting question. I explained best I could.... but really that is the only time I notice them if they aren't running in front of me.

So no I don't judge you. I don't actually care. I care that my kid can behave without it and that's it. Was it ever EASY? No. It is a lot of work ~ but in the end was worth it to ME. Everyone should do what they need to and what works for THEM.

Not sure how much more clear I can be.

Reread your post #83. You come across as in you did it with two children so the rest of us should be able to as well. Perhaps I misread your tone as happens sometimes. I can assure you, no one in their right mind would attempt it with my two.

 

[minnie mum]

I haven't read the whole thread but thank you for this. I don't even have kids but DH (and me some too) have seen so many kids being almost dragged along on those things so they look so much like someone walking a dog on a leash... thinking of it this way makes it seem much much less cruel. (As would not forcing the child to move by pulling them by the tether)

How could you even do this? The tether is on the back. If you were pulling them they'd be going backwards, flat on their wee little butts. I don't think I have ever seen this. I have seen parents rein them back if they're straining forwards on the harness, but never the reverse.

My complaint with the backpack harnesses were people using them in the play areas. The parents were standing letting the kids run around, nearly tripping and/or decapitating other kids (depending on their size.)

Fine for walking around. Not okay for playing!

Can't argue with you there!

 

[goofy4wdw2]

I think it depends on the child. We used one only in Disney for our first child because she was a runner and hated the stroller. We didn't even think of using one for our second child since he just walked next to us or rode in the stroller without a problem. Curious to see how #3 will be...he is not quite walking yet but will be by our trip in November. I'm hoping he continues to like the stroller so we can move quickly through the parks!

 

[Suellen]

Reread your post #83. You come across as in you did it with two children so the rest of us should be able to as well. Perhaps I misread your tone as happens sometimes. I can assure you, no one in their right mind would attempt it with my two.

So you can't tell me what was judgmental... it just IS. Okay got it. Just know it wasn't.

It CAN be done with two kids. Notice I said every family is different? I don't know your kids just like you don't know mine... though you have a pretty high opinion of my four year old without knowing her. Yeah she is a good kid with a great head on her shoulders... the other one on the other hand.... she is more then a little bit of a handful ~ we work HARD with her.

I'm probably one of the least judgmental people you will ever meet. I just don't care what others do ~ unless it harms my family. You want to/need to leash your kid ... go for it. You want to put your 15 year old in a stroller? Not my business. You want to have a condiment salad for dinner? Enjoy.

I only ask that people are mindful of those around them.

I'm a little confused why all discipline is looked at as punishment. For us discipline can be as basic as correcting a behavior verbally or reminding them of something they already know. Discipline should not have such a negative connotation attached to it.

While this thread has been fun... I've said all I have to.

OP ~ I guess bring it with you if you feel you need it ... you know your kid best.

 

[larryz]

We tell them that if they run off, we will pack up and leave...it always works.

Someday you may have to follow thru on that threat, just to keep it credible.

 

[Scotico]

Someday you may have to follow thru on that threat, just to keep it credible.

One time at Disney we did it. My older one wanted to see some character but she was not finished with her lunch. Well she did not listen and got up slowly to see it. Well I picked her up, sat her down for 5 min after she finished her meal. She never ran off after that. Another time at the beach, she was running off to play with some other kids we did not know. I grabbed her and walked her back to our house to stay with the nanny ( we live on the beach so it's a short walk). Since then she always asks me or her mother if she can go play with someone else at the beach.

 

[Sunnywho]

My oldest child loves to follow rules. So she had no problems staying close.
My middle child is fearful. Afraid of the dark, afraid of toilet flushing. So he always stayed very close.
My youngest child is not afraid of anything. It's a big world out there and he wants to see it.

If all the kids had been like my first, I'd have thought my rules were the best and kids were easy. If all the kids had been like my second, I'd have had no problems trying to keep them close but some problems trying to get them to release my leg and not be scared of Mickey, fireworks, etc. If all the kids had been like my third, I'd probably have invested in tethers, and I would've thought discipline was very important and effective. But discipline wasn't needed for the older two in the same situations.

 

[FosterA]

These child-leash threads always amaze me. What on Earth is the big deal?! It seems like so many people are appalled by them because they "look" like a dog leash. How dumb is that? My kids slept in cribs and those sort of "look" like dog crates.

For the record...I've never used a leash on my now 15 y.o and 12 y.o. because they were such cling-on babies that I could rarely remove them from my body. But...I've seen those little monkey backpack leash things and I think they are pretty clever. When I first saw one I actually thought that it was more caring of a parent to use one than strapping their kid into a stroller because at least with the leash, they could get some exercise.

I know it's shocking to some people but alot of parents actually would like to enjoy themselves while on vacation and not just have it all be about the kid and proving yourself to be a "consistent and controlled" parent that is always "on". If leashing the tike allows you to actually have a better time and nobody is being hurt in the process and it's not disrupting other guests than what's the problem? My 12 year old son loves soda and I never allow it at home but when we were at Disney, that kid OD'd on the stuff. You know why? I wanted to be lazy and have a good time at Disney and didn't feel like arguing about how much coke was too much etc etc. His coke drinking didn't effect any other guests or take away from anybody else's enjoyment of the park so I didn't let it bother me. If a "leasher" wants to relax and attempt to have a good time and loosen up on the "consistent parenting" thing for a couple days I highly doubt the kid will turn out to be a delinquent because for 5 days he wasn't disciplined enough to walk side-by-side with mom. Loosen up people........

 

[larryz]

My kids slept in cribs and those sort of "look" like dog crates.

ITA! Stand by for reaction...

 

[linzbear]

These child-leash threads always amaze me. What on Earth is the big deal?! It seems like so many people are appalled by them because they "look" like a dog leash. How dumb is that? My kids slept in cribs and those sort of "look" like dog crates.

Yeah, cribs, strollers, baby carriers, and car seats are all baby cages, but people freak out if the kid has a leash that actually gives them some independence? I never understood that.

 

[stashbin]

These child-leash threads always amaze me. What on Earth is the big deal?! It seems like so many people are appalled by them because they "look" like a dog leash. How dumb is that? My kids slept in cribs and those sort of "look" like dog crates.

For the record...I've never used a leash on my now 15 y.o and 12 y.o. because they were such cling-on babies that I could rarely remove them from my body. But...I've seen those little monkey backpack leash things and I think they are pretty clever. When I first saw one I actually thought that it was more caring of a parent to use one than strapping their kid into a stroller because at least with the leash, they could get some exercise.

I know it's shocking to some people but alot of parents actually would like to enjoy themselves while on vacation and not just have it all be about the kid and proving yourself to be a "consistent and controlled" parent that is always "on". If leashing the tike allows you to actually have a better time and nobody is being hurt in the process and it's not disrupting other guests than what's the problem? My 12 year old son loves soda and I never allow it at home but when we were at Disney, that kid OD'd on the stuff. You know why? I wanted to be lazy and have a good time at Disney and didn't feel like arguing about how much coke was too much etc etc. His coke drinking didn't effect any other guests or take away from anybody else's enjoyment of the park so I didn't let it bother me. If a "leasher" wants to relax and attempt to have a good time and loosen up on the "consistent parenting" thing for a couple days I highly doubt the kid will turn out to be a delinquent because for 5 days he wasn't disciplined enough to walk side-by-side with mom. Loosen up people........

Can I get an AMEN!!!!!!

I know when I am at Disney I am constantly walking around judging everyone's parenting skills! NOT!

 

[bytheblood]

I like a good old-fashioned method myself. Take walks with your little one and teach him to hold your hand. Let the child know the running away from mom and dad will result in some kind of disciplinary action. If that just will not work, the harness is the best result.

 

[Hannathy]

If a "leasher" wants to relax and attempt to have a good time and loosen up on the "consistent parenting" thing for a couple days I highly doubt the kid will turn out to be a delinquent because for 5 days he wasn't disciplined enough to walk side-by-side with mom. Loosen up people........

You don't start at Disney. If you have been doing it since the day they started walking it is second nature and you don't have to be dealing with it constantly, it doesn't cut into your vacation at all. They already know to do it.

I'm a very loose parent , I have no rules on what they eat or when they go to bed,what they watch or read, but behaving in public and staying with me, Yep that is a must always.

 

[stashbin]

You don't start at Disney. If you have been doing it since the day they started walking it is second nature and you don't have to be dealing with it constantly, it doesn't cut into your vacation at all. They already know to do it. I'm a very loose parent , I have no rules on what they eat or when they go to bed,what they watch or read, but behaving in public and staying with me, Yep that is a must always.

So what if they don't do it on a daily basis. What if they are loose all of the time and feel like a leash is best for them when they go to a huge park filled with people? Who cares! When I am at DW and I see a kid melting down or on a leash I don't automatically assume that the parents are not parenting their children at home or practicing best methods with them all of the time. Honestly, I don't care.
If you want to put your kid on a leash...leash him. The sun will rise again!

 

[ttintagel]

My oldest child loves to follow rules. So she had no problems staying close.
My middle child is fearful. Afraid of the dark, afraid of toilet flushing. So he always stayed very close.
My youngest child is not afraid of anything. It's a big world out there and he wants to see it.

If all the kids had been like my first, I'd have thought my rules were the best and kids were easy. If all the kids had been like my second, I'd have had no problems trying to keep them close but some problems trying to get them to release my leg and not be scared of Mickey, fireworks, etc. If all the kids had been like my third, I'd probably have invested in tethers, and I would've thought discipline was very important and effective. But discipline wasn't needed for the older two in the same situations.

SO much this. When you see siblings who had the same genes and the same upbringing by the same parents, who end up having completely different personalities, you have to accept that not all kids are alike and they won't all respond in the same way to the same methods.

 

[DisneyFan32WI]

My opinion is that children on leashes is a result of just plain lazy parenting. I cringe when I see children on leashes. I rarely see this, so I know leashes are the minority.

 

[neodisneyfan]

I do not think calling it a tether or however you want to justify putting a leash on your child makes it OK. I have a son who was a very headstrong toddler who liked to run and not sit in his stoller. We used DISCIPLINE, I know dirty word to some, to keep him safe when in Disney. We had conversations, consequences and punsishments if the rules were not followed. I think part of the problem with kids today is that parents do not want to make their kids feel bad and make them follow the rules. Good luck when your kids are teenagers and they have never had any consequences for bad behaviour. My kids are not perfect but they know what consequences are. So no leash but hand holding and stroller.

 

[maxiesmom]

I do not think calling it a tether or however you want to justify putting a leash on your child makes it OK. I have a son who was a very headstrong toddler who liked to run and not sit in his stoller. We used DISCIPLINE, I know dirty word to some, to keep him safe when in Disney. We had conversations, consequences and punsishments if the rules were not followed. I think part of the problem with kids today is that parents do not want to make their kids feel bad and make them follow the rules. Good luck when your kids are teenagers and they have never had any consequences for bad behaviour. My kids are not perfect but they know what consequences are. So no leash but hand holding and stroller.

I have to ask:Why is a stroller a viable alternative to walking, but a leash is not? At least with a leash the child is out and walking.

Also, many posters would argue that having your child in a stroller is teaching them to be lazy, and they sure won't learn any consequences to bad behavior if you keep them strapped down all day. Not sure how someone can justify using a stroller but not a leash.

 

[phorsenuf]

SO much this. When you see siblings who had the same genes and the same upbringing by the same parents, who end up having completely different personalities, you have to accept that not all kids are alike and they won't all respond in the same way to the same methods.

I don't agree. Discipline is discipline. It bugs me when people use this as an excuse. To me it is a cop out parents use to make themselves feel better when they can't control their children.

 

[stashbin]

My opinion is that children on leashes is a result of just plain lazy parenting. I cringe when I see children on leashes. I rarely see this, so I know leashes are the minority.

You know, that's great that you feel that way. However, the OP asked for strategies (leash, or other) for helping with her situation. It absolutely amazes me that you think just because a kid is on a leash that the parent is lazy.
I have never used a leash, but if I did it would be my choice to be a "lazy parent."