agree to disagree? gray areas everywhere

[LadyBeBop]

So that I why I think we should have volunteer lists for jurors. I know that if my children were grown I would sign up so someone else could have a break.

Volunteer jurors seem like a good idea. However the problem is..a jury pool is supposed to be a random sample of the community. Having volunteers defeats the purpose of the random sample.

 

[IDoDis]

I just wanted to respond to something I have read here over and over. Some people can't believe that parents don't have some sort of back up child care. I don't know why they can't believe it. In these days many grandparents work full time. Many people don't have family near by. Many people don't go out often if at all and don't even have a Saturday night sitter. Also, many people simply cannot afford to send their kids to some kind of drop in care. It is very expensive. In a true emergency I am sure that many people can call on a friend. For something like being a juror on a trial for an extended time period that is not a possibility. That is just asking way too much of someone.

Also, if you are nursing it is not as simple as "just pump." Some kids will not take a bottle. Try all you want and they will not take it. If you are at court you can't just pump whenever you need to. You have to follow their schedule. You also need time to actually have enough milk pumped in storage to last a day. Think about how much formula a baby drinks a day. Now keep in mind that breastmilk is digested quicker. A Mom can't just put an order in for 32oz of milk for the day. It takes time to up your supply etc. It is not a fountain.

I think that jury duty is a hardship for most people whether you have kids or not. I do think though that we need to require people to do it. There are plenty of people who would love to volunteer to do it. Why not offer that as an option to people?

I worked full time and my kids only drank breast milk until they were a year old. I pumped in the morning an hour before waking up the baby. I pumped at work during my lunch break. I brought a cooler to work to store the milk bags until I got home. I pumped at night, too. It doesn't take long to increase breast milk output. I could pump on one side and feed off of the other if I kept up the nursing and pumping. I did this for nearly 8 months until both of my kids were a year old and could drink whole milk.

A couple of weeks before going back to work full-time, I got them used to drinking from a bottle so they'd drink at the sitter (only breast milk). They did not give up the breast for the bottle, either. Once they were a year old, I only nursed them in the morning and before bed. Then it was just in the morning until they were no longer nursing.

So, it can be done. Is it inconvenient? Yes! Does it take extra time away from doing things like browsing the internet? Yes! But not only SAHMs nurse. Working moms manage and do, too. Doing jury duty for 2 weeks with at least 2 weeks notice can also be done for moms who breastfeed.

 

[kaytieeldr]

The 'inconveniences' are living, breathing, children. The most vulnerable of our citizens I just can't get over the idea that they are considered merely an inconvenience, rather than treasures and the future of our nation! If they need mom/dad for a few years, that's fine with me. That's a sacrifice for the better of our society.

Although I was very blessed to have extended family around when my babies were little and I was called-I didn't have outside the family sitters and I would never leave my kids with anyone who thinks they are an inconvenience and an excuse...

No, the inconvenience is the actions the parent has to take to provide arrangements for care for those children in order to serve jury duty. The children aren't the inconvenience at all.

The irritation here is that the stay-at-home parents (moms, in this thread) are using their children - along with their refusal to work out a solution - as what appears to be their "right" to not serve on a jury the entire time they have children at home for whom to care.

karice2 is right - people (not necessarily the same people avoiding jury duty, or SAHMs in general) have no trouble turning their lives upside down for something they WANT to do, like a last-minute vacation, but with a month or more notice for jury duty? Nope. Easier to find an excuse, or use one's regular excuse, or come up with some plan/claim to get oneself excused altogether even if it's false...

 

[2girlsR2good]

I am not a SAHM, but I did take a year off for maternity leave when I gave birth to my twin girls. While I was on leave, I got called for jury duty.

I had already served for a week on a murder trial 2 years previously. It was incredibly inconvenient, but I did it and was, well, not glad to do it. Truthfully, it was one of the most depressing things I've ever seen, but I was pleased to have served and I thought we did the right thing as a jury. It was my responsibility and I took it seriously.

When I got the summons for jury duty with two nursing babies, I panicked. Yes, someone with preschool aged children can have no backup system. We didn't/don't have family in town, nor do we have the kinds of grandparents who were willing to be left alone with the twins--they were older and scared of them (one girl in particular was pretty fragile for the first 6 mos of her life). As an older mom, I didn't have friends home with young children who were willing to take in two babies. I wasn't yet networked with other moms--I went from working full time, no kids, to home all day with two babies. I found a college-aged sitter who would watch the girls for a couple of hours and that was it. I called daycares--nope, they don't take infants for short-term, undefined lengths of time. Called the court--nope, no facilities or schedule to accommodate pumping. Let me tell you--if you're nursing twins, you do not just go several hours without pumping. Called a service for in-home care and they would do the one day I was called, but would not guarantee they could provide care for then length of a trial.

It really does happen that way. Did my husband and I worry that we didn't have anyone if there was an emergency? You bet we did. We worried about a LOT that year.

There are people who are foregoing the income of work to take care of their family rather than with paid caregivers, and jury duty is more than an inconvenience to their lives. While that isn't my situation any longer, my experience has taught me to be slower to judge another person's claim about what they can or cannot do. What about someone at home with a severely autistic child? Or a medically fragile one? A parent with dementia? These are people who live one (should be) minor emergency away from a full-blown crisis every day. A list of bonded sitters doesn't begin to meet their needs.

The "mile in their moccasins" rule applies more often than it is used.

I don't usually get involved in these kinds of conversations, back to my regularly scheduled Disney fun!

 

[Eternalkudr]

Something many seem to be missing: being the primary caretaker to a child under 10 is by federal law an absolute excuse from jury duty. You don't have to be a sahm to be a primary caretaker but it would qualify. Most of the time you just write this on the long form they mail you after the initial summons and you are done. I personally think this is a great law and no different than excusing EMTs and firefighters etc.

 

[stitchlovestink]

I am not a SAHM, but I did take a year off for maternity leave when I gave birth to my twin girls. While I was on leave, I got called for jury duty.

I had already served for a week on a murder trial 2 years previously. It was incredibly inconvenient, but I did it and was, well, not glad to do it. Truthfully, it was one of the most depressing things I've ever seen, but I was pleased to have served and I thought we did the right thing as a jury. It was my responsibility and I took it seriously.

When I got the summons for jury duty with two nursing babies, I panicked. Yes, someone with preschool aged children can have no backup system. We didn't/don't have family in town, nor do we have the kinds of grandparents who were willing to be left alone with the twins--they were older and scared of them (one girl in particular was pretty fragile for the first 6 mos of her life). As an older mom, I didn't have friends home with young children who were willing to take in two babies. I wasn't yet networked with other moms--I went from working full time, no kids, to home all day with two babies. I found a college-aged sitter who would watch the girls for a couple of hours and that was it. I called daycares--nope, they don't take infants for short-term, undefined lengths of time. Called the court--nope, no facilities or schedule to accommodate pumping. Let me tell you--if you're nursing twins, you do not just go several hours without pumping. Called a service for in-home care and they would do the one day I was called, but would not guarantee they could provide care for then length of a trial.!

bolding is min....
I am not trying to be mean or poke fun but the bolded part just made me laugh so hard. It reminds me of a tv commercial a few years back. I think it was for AirTran, I believe. The young parents are 'plopping' their twins into the arms of two much older adults ( I assume that they were supposed to be the grandparents) and the old man is yelling something like "Don't leave us with the babies!!" It was a rather humorous commerical at least IMHO.

It really does happen that way. Did my husband and I worry that we didn't have anyone if there was an emergency? You bet we did. We worried about a LOT that year.

There are people who are foregoing the income of work to take care of their family rather than with paid caregivers, and jury duty is more than an inconvenience to their lives. While that isn't my situation any longer, my experience has taught me to be slower to judge another person's claim about what they can or cannot do. What about someone at home with a severely autistic child? Or a medically fragile one? A parent with dementia? These are people who live one (should be) minor emergency away from a full-blown crisis every day. A list of bonded sitters doesn't begin to meet their needs.

The "mile in their moccasins" rule applies more often than it is used.
I don't usually get involved in these kinds of conversations, back to my regularly scheduled Disney fun!

VERY well stated!!

 

[merriwthr]

I received jury duty notice, and sent in my regular excuse--non-employed, caring for 3 small children. I was told by the clerk that this is not an excuse in federal court. I am awaiting response to a letter I sent to court, explaining that my baby is receiving services for developmental delays and a parent (not a babysitter) must be present for the instructors to come to our home.

If I go, DH will have to take the day off of work (we're living on one income), and if I get chosen to serve, it will cost me a lot for childcare! Anyone ever experience this, and any advice?

Please note: I do believe in jury duty and will gladly serve--when my youngest is in school full time!

Unfortunately, you don't get to choose when you will perform jury duty - especially Federal Jury Duty. As a member of the legal community I want to stress that if you follow the advice of those who posted to take your kids with you to Federal Jury Duty, you will be charged with contempt and be sent to jail.

My suggestion is to petition the Clerk of the Court to delay your summons for Jury Duty to give you time to make arrangements for suitable care for your youngest. You will need to provide documentation from your pediatrician, care team, etc. that you must be available during his/her sessions. You might also want to prepare a statement of financial hardship and provide documentation to *prove* that your husband will not be paid while you serve Federal Jury Duty.

This will only get your service delayed, not put off until it's convenient for you. Jury duty is at the convenience of the courts - not of the jurist. Sorry - but that's our constitutional right.

One thing you may want to remember - you were called because you registered to vote. If you don't want called for jury duty, then don't register to vote and you won't be called. But then, you can't complain when our government acts in a way you disapprove of.

Hard choices - but no one ever said that freedom was easy.

Good Luck!

 

[stitchlovestink]

One thing you may want to remember - you were called because you registered to vote. If you don't want called for jury duty, then don't register to vote and you won't be called. But then, you can't complain when our government acts in a way you disapprove of.

Hard choices - but no one ever said that freedom was easy.

Good Luck!

Here they use MVA records for jurorists too. So I guess if you don't want to serve, don't drive either??

 

[kinntj]

Here they use MVA records for jurorists too. So I guess if you don't want to serve, don't drive either??

I looked at the local Federal court Q and A and they state that they take names off of voters registrations and then match them up against drivers licenses.

I couldn't imagine giving any of them up though. OMMV.

 

[LoveBWVVBR]

A couple of weeks before going back to work full-time, I got them used to drinking from a bottle so they'd drink at the sitter (only breast milk). They did not give up the breast for the bottle, either. Once they were a year old, I only nursed them in the morning and before bed. Then it was just in the morning until they were no longer nursing.

Not all children can take a bottle. My 2nd is nearly 2 and still gets a LOT of therapies from Early Steps because of her inability to eat solids. This child could not take a bottle and not for lack of trying. She has an oral-motor sensory disorder, just like my older child and my husband. Had I not been able to breastfeed, she would have been tube-fed. I thought that this was quite unusual, but my DD's speech therapist (for feeding therapy) has several children like my DD. Not all were able to nurse, and several are on feeding tubes while simultaneously trying to learn to eat by mouth.

Now, would you have proposed that I leave my child for days at a time to do jury duty? What should I have done, had a g-tube placed so I could do jury duty? Give me a break. If I had gotten called and lived in a state w/no postponements or exceptions, I would have simply taken my chances of being arrested rather than starving my child.

FWIW, she's 2 now and can drink from a spouted sippy cup and can eat small amounts of certain solids (not reliably, but most of the time). She'd be just fine for a day or more if I got called. I would now have no issues w/leaving her w/my DH for a day or 2 so I could go to jury duty. Common sense needs to be employed when it comes to allowing people to postpone jury duty.

 

[Tinkmom]

Something many seem to be missing: being the primary caretaker to a child under 10 is by federal law an absolute excuse from jury duty. You don't have to be a sahm to be a primary caretaker but it would qualify. Most of the time you just write this on the long form they mail you after the initial summons and you are done. I personally think this is a great law and no different than excusing EMTs and firefighters etc.

This is absolutely not true.

 

[Eternalkudr]

This is absolutely not true.

It absolutely is true in all federal courts. The post specified federal. Many states have similar exemptions. Odd how that upsets many people here.

 

[jodifla]

This is a state blow by blow. There does seem to be a federal law with those caring for children under 10.

http://www.familyfriendlyjuryduty.org/JuryStates/JuryStates.htm

 

[IDoDis]

It absolutely is true in all federal courts. The post specified federal. Many states have similar exemptions. Odd how that upsets many people here.

Only because it is not true. Please post a valid link backing up your claim.

 

[Michelle and crew]

This is a state blow by blow. There does seem to be a federal law with those caring for children under 10.

http://www.familyfriendlyjuryduty.org/JuryStates/JuryStates.htm

Lol, so our federal court system has more compassion than a bunch of Disney fans! That is too funny!

 

[Mouse House Mama]

I worked full time and my kids only drank breast milk until they were a year old. I pumped in the morning an hour before waking up the baby. I pumped at work during my lunch break. I brought a cooler to work to store the milk bags until I got home. I pumped at night, too. It doesn't take long to increase breast milk output. I could pump on one side and feed off of the other if I kept up the nursing and pumping. I did this for nearly 8 months until both of my kids were a year old and could drink whole milk.

A couple of weeks before going back to work full-time, I got them used to drinking from a bottle so they'd drink at the sitter (only breast milk). They did not give up the breast for the bottle, either. Once they were a year old, I only nursed them in the morning and before bed. Then it was just in the morning until they were no longer nursing.

So, it can be done. Is it inconvenient? Yes! Does it take extra time away from doing things like browsing the internet? Yes! But not only SAHMs nurse. Working moms manage and do, too. Doing jury duty for 2 weeks with at least 2 weeks notice can also be done for moms who breastfeed.

I am glad that this worked for you. This does not work for every child or parent though. Having nursed (and still am nursing) all of my children (5) some of my children simply would not take a bottle. It was not for lack of trying but they would not drink from one. So it is not a one size fits all answer. Also, pumping doesn't work for every Mother. So for you it was a success and you were able to make it work and that is great. That doesn't mean that every woman can do that. You also cannot pump at jury duty like you would be able to at home or like the baby would eat at home. Would you really want me on a jury when all I can think about is that my ****s are engorged and starting to leak and hurt and wondering if my baby is crying because they can't nurse? Really? I wouldn't want you on my jury if your mind was elsewhere but that is just me. I do applaud you for not giving up nursing because you were working. Many people are not that dedicated.

 

[jodifla]

Lol, so our federal court system has more compassion than a bunch of Disney fans! That is too funny!

But what's interesting is that the actual government website doesn't list this exemption.

 

[NiftyJ88]

I was once called for federal jury duty which was about an hour away. My report date was Feb. 28th and my due date with DD was March 2nd. I didn't think it was a great idea for me to be so far away so close to my due date, so I asked to be given a different date. They just excused me instead. I was bummed

 

[angwill]

I looked at the local Federal court Q and A and they state that they take names off of voters registrations and then match them up against drivers licenses.

I couldn't imagine giving any of them up though. OMMV.

I read it was from voters registrations in our state too till a friend who is not a registered voter got called to jury duty. When I inquired about it they said they will go through Drivers license lists if they do not have enough registered voters.

 

[Robinrs]

Lol, so our federal court system has more compassion than a bunch of Disney fans! That is too funny!

You must be new here. I think sometimes hades has more compassion that this bunch of "Disney" fans... visit the community board sometimes.