Advice-what you wish you would have known

[Ashmagash]

Congrats to all the Disney brides and busy planners!! I'm just starting the process and I would like any and ALL adivce you have. What do you wish you would have known that you figured out? Any tips or not so well known hidden facts? I've learned so much on disboards I know you're the right people to turn to for Disney wedding planning advice! We're doing a destination wedding at Disney for 50 people and a reception at home too for everyone who can't make it. This puts us on a tight budget. I love the Disney wedding chapel and he wants the reception at the grand floridian but I'd love to do it in epcot at night. Essentially our budget will dictate what we do. Let me know what worked best for you and what you did to help cut costs.

 

[lurkyloo]

This is kinda long, but it's the "Glad I Did/Wish I'd Done" section from my wedding trip report:

I have to confess, my memories are so fond that my “Glad I Did” list got kinda out of hand. I mean, of course I’m glad I chose the Roots, picked our three locations, took a boat to the reception, bought my dress for half price on eBay, etc. So I’ve tried to get it down to mostly things that some people might be on the fence about. Also, I sneaked in a list of Honeymoon pointers just because everything went so smoothly and DH kept remarking on how cost-effective yet fun-packed the trip was.


GLAD I DID (or DIDN’T DO)

Wedding

Shipped the dress: I can’t tell you how nice it was to travel with just a few suitcases and not worry about where my dress was going to be stored on the plane. FedEx-Kinko’s was reasonably priced, and Carolyn Allen did all the packing/unpacking and transportation.

No welcome bags: I wanted to, really I did! I liked the idea of the project. But I was SO glad not to have to buy all the items, stuff the bags, transport the bags, distribute the bags and then agonize over who didn’t get a bag from the hotel. Plus, I’ve heard that a lot of the stuff in them gets tossed out...

No bridesmaids = no dresses, no hair and makeup, no flowers, and no gifts to pay for. And no stress over who to ask, hurt feelings, slackers, hubbub in the room on the wedding day, etc.

No newsletters: OK, we sent one two-page letter at the last minute when we decided to have a meet ‘n’ greet and wanted to explain transportation. But I’ve heard so many brides say that no one reads these and just ends up asking you questions about all the same stuff in the lovingly designed newsletter you slaved over.

Use part of the reception menu for the pre-reception: This was actually suggested by my WP, and it saved money and saved wasting food. The reception menus have way too much food on them as it is!

Ice cream with the wedding cake: I guess a lot of times people don't eat the wedding cake, but ours disappeared quickly. It may be because the flavors were all variations on chocolate, but I think the ice cream made it.

Dessert Party: If you can swing it, do it! I’d recommend this over a rehearsal dinner, even. It is unique to a Disney wedding and the thing your guests will be talking about for years.


Honeymoon

No family on the honeymoon: We let people know that the honeymoon was just for us, and I’m pretty sure they understood. It was so nice not to be obligated to be anywhere or meet anyone, or to have to try to coordinate a big group with a bazillion different agendas. For almost two weeks we got to do whatever we wanted whenever we wanted to – bliss!

Rent Disney Vacation Club points: I can’t recommend this enough – we stayed in two different Deluxe resorts for less than our guests paid for a Moderate with the low-season wedding discount! Plus we had a kitchenette in both places, which was great for corralling leftover desserts.

Disney’s Honeymoon Registry/Sunshine Rewards/Disney Visa Rewards: We were so surprised by how many people used our Disney Honeymoon Registry, and it allowed us to do things we never would have been able to afford, like parasailing and the Lunch With an Imagineer program. I also did a LOT of surveys and offers on Sunshine Rewards in the months before our trip and cashed out for Disney gift cards. Along with our Disney Visa Rewards, these things paid for our entire honeymoon!


WISH I'D DONE

Only offer guests 2 of the 4 blocked hotels: I loved the idea of blocking 4 hotels so that a discount would be available to us at all of them for our honeymoon stay. But if I’d known about one-way buses and the time savings of transporting guests from fewer hotels, I would only have given mine 2 choices. As it is, most of them only stayed at 2 of the 4 – the Value and the Moderate.

Vintage Rolls: I hate limos; I just saw ours as Point A-to-Point B transportation, but I forgot it would be in all our pictures and our video – ugh! Caryn has made me feel a lot better about this by pointing out that I am too tall for the Rolls! However, I’ve always loved the idea of creative wedding transport, and if I’d been thinking about it, I would have found something as an alternative – maybe a Vespa?

More specificity about cake colors: I was SO specific with multiple pictures of everything else at my planning session, I’m not sure why it didn’t occur to me to include multiple samples of the cake colors. Oh yeah – because I thought they do what was in the picture I gave them! Still, I can’t complain too much – the designs were all spot on.

Customize the dessert party menu: At the time, I thought that you had to pick one of the set dessert party menus Epcot offers and stick to it. Now I know that you can basically build your own menu as long as it + drinks adds up to the minimum expenditure requirement.

Wax at home before I left: Depending on the kind of bikini wax you want, you may not be able to find it inside WDW or close by. After my horrible experience at Mandara Spa, I think I would have been much better off getting this over with before I left (and getting to eat free brownies and lemonade at Bliss!).

 

[aduck126]

the only thing i would have changed is that i would have sprung for Disney's private transportation for our guests. We went from the Poly to our Dessert Party in Epcot. DH and I decided to use cabs and pay the meters for everyone. Except the cabs are a different company (mears) and they are HORRIBLE. Only 2 cabs took the guests to the correct location so most of our party was an hour late. And they overcharged alot of the people. The disney bus I believe is around 500.00 but looking back it would have probably been worth it.

 

[PrincessShea]

I'll do the same thing as Carrie and just post from my TR:



Glad I did

1. Had Daisy and Donald. It's a lot of money. We gave up the MK photoshoot to do it. I'm glad I did. Everyone was surprised, including Michael. My mom cried. I'm of the belief that if you are doing a Disney wedding, you should go all out and make it as Disney as possible. Again, it's personal preference. For some people it's tacky and childish. To me it was fun and made the ceremony (which, let's face it, is usually the most boring part of a wedding) a worthwhile part of the day. I would do it again in a heartbeat.

2. Had a dessert party. I cannot describe how magical this was. Trust me, I do not usually use the word magical. This was. Firstly, Epcot was kind of crowded. There was a buzz as people were staking out their spots for Illuminations. The event guide who walked us from the backstage is one of the nicest people I've ever encountered. As we entered the park everyone starting clapping and yelling 'congratulations.' It was like a movie, I cannot adequately describe it. It was honestly one of the greatest moments of my life.

My party was in Morocco. I again bring up the red headed stepchild comment in regards to Morocco. On this board its discussed as if it's behind a cement pillar in the middle of the parking lot. It's a great location. The wall is not high, you can see the show and globe perfectly, you can hear everything, its great. So if you are an escape bride "stuck" with Morocco, chill out. I hope my DP pictures come out ok because I want to reassure people out there that it's great. Everyone in my group said it was the best location and so cool, etc, etc.

Wish I didn't

1. Have so much food. Don't plan a wedding when you are a on a wedding diet. My eyes were bigger than my stomach. There was too much food. It was a huge waste of money. We had the ceremony cake and champagne. For dinner, we had 4 courses, not including the bread. We had a BOC bar at the dessert party. We had dessert at the dessert party. Way too much. If I could do it over, I would have had an appetizer and entree for dinner, and no dessert party bar. It was too hot to drink anyway.

2. Have a wedding in the middle of the afternoon in June. I'm a teacher. Our sisters were/are in college. Summer is really the only time this wedding was possible. If I had to do it again though, or advise someone, I would have found a way to have it some other time. For 2 weeks I compulsively checked 5 different weather websites. The morning of the wedding, even though the ceremony wasn't until 2:30pm, I was up at 5am and running down to the Beach Club lobby checking weather reports. Statistically, it should have rained. It didn't. I was just really lucky. If I HAD to have it in the summer, a morning ceremony probably would have been better. I just hate the idea of so much dead time between wedding events and breakfast foods are not for me. Again, it all turned out great, but it was pure luck.

 

[Ashmagash]

Great advice! Thank you I'm starting to get overwhelmed..but in a good full of fun choices way!

 

[Dani916]

I was going to post this same question. I have all sorts of great ideas, but I want to know about the "I wish I had/hadn't" things to help in my planning. Thanks for posting!

 

[*Pixiedust1438*]

Great idea for a post! Already so much great info. on here!

2. Have a wedding in the middle of the afternoon in June.[/B][/COLOR] I'm a teacher. Our sisters were/are in college. Summer is really the only time this wedding was possible. If I had to do it again though, or advise someone, I would have found a way to have it some other time. For 2 weeks I compulsively checked 5 different weather websites. The morning of the wedding, even though the ceremony wasn't until 2:30pm, I was up at 5am and running down to the Beach Club lobby checking weather reports. Statistically, it should have rained. It didn't. I was just really lucky. If I HAD to have it in the summer, a morning ceremony probably would have been better. I just hate the idea of so much dead time between wedding events and breakfast foods are not for me. Again, it all turned out great, but it was pure luck.

I am in the same situation as you, I am graduating with my teaching degree in May 2011, and we are having our wedding a few weeks later. I really wanted to do it in March or April but I will be student teaching, so there is just no way. A lot of our guests are also in College. We are having a 5pm ceremony, so I am really hoping it will cool down a little by then, and everything is inside, with the exception of our rehearsal dinner DP. I'm already freaking out about heat/rain though!

 

[PrincessShea]

Great idea for a post! Already so much great info. on here!

I am in the same situation as you, I am graduating with me teaching degree in May 2011, and we are having our wedding a few weeks later. I really wanted to do it in March or April but I will be student teaching, so there is just no way. A lot of our guests are also in College. We are having a 5pm ceremony, so I am really hoping it will cool down a little by then, and everything is inside, with the exception of our rehearsal dinner DP. I'm already freaking out about heat/rain though!

Yea having a wedding while student teaching is a horrible idea. You will be so stressed out and tired then, trust me, you will be in no mood for a wedding...so I think you made a good choice waiting until after graduation.

I'll keep my fingers crossed for you about the rain. The morning ceremonies are the safest because the rain occurs later in the day after the heat/humidity builds up. Locals classically say that it rains everyday in the summer sometime between 2-5.

But since everything is inside, you shouldn't have to worry too much. The DP will be so late in the day, that if it rains, it will probably be over by 8-9.

 

[girli565]

Great idea for a post! Already so much great info. on here!



I am in the same situation as you, I am graduating with me teaching degree in May 2011, and we are having our wedding a few weeks later. I really wanted to do it in March or April but I will be student teaching, so there is just no way. A lot of our guests are also in College. We are having a 5pm ceremony, so I am really hoping it will cool down a little by then, and everything is inside, with the exception of our rehearsal dinner DP. I'm already freaking out about heat/rain though!

It does rain everyday in the summer, lol, but what was said before is totally true, it's usually just in the afternoon after 2pm and it usually ends before 7 or 8pm. FL rain is so crazy in the summer.

 

[LuluLovesDisney]

I wish I would have known that I wouldn't automatically get to see the WP the day of my planning session. I had to come back later in the trip to get a site visit because I just assumed that while I was at Franck's we'd get to go over.

I wish I would have known how much dessert party food would get thrown away. I would have encouraged some people to bring baggies or eat more or something!

There is a ton I am glad I did and I will work on those whenever I get around to a mini TR!

 

[Ashmagash]

Will they not box dp leftovers for you?

 

[girli565]

Will they not box dp leftovers for you?

I think the cake is the only thing they will let you take to go. Food will not be boxed up. That's what I was told and I"ve heard a few people told the same thing.

 

[Bridie1996]

just a note on the leftovers-

I brought some cake bags and had stickers made with our names (www.myownlabels.com), the date and the quote "faith, trust and pixie dust" on them. They turned out very pretty and not obvious like running in there with tupperware or anything.

Then, anyone who wanted leftovers from the DP just took a bag or two (or three in some cases) and filled them up. They worked well.

I don't think they are actually SUPPOSED to be able to do it, but we didn't ask permission and weren't told to stop.


As for what I wish I'd known or would have done differently.

Done Differently

1) I would have had tablecloths on the tables in the attic. A small thing, but the pictures annoy me now!

2) I would have gone with only 2 types flowers in my bouquet.

3)Splurged and gotten one of the vintage cars.

4) gotten more rest in the days leading up/let others help more. I also would have shipped the welcome bags to everyone prior to the wedding so we didn't have to worry about distributing them there to give us more free time to enjoy ourselves and be rested for the big day.

Glad I did:
1) the Dessert party! A great experience for our guests and we didn't have a professional photographer so we were able to relax and enjoy them and the show. I may not have tons of pictures with the fireworks behind me, but I was able to have quiet moments with each of my parents, my cousin and a close friend of mine when I hadn't been able to have that all day. It was a great closer to a very long, busy day!

2) the bridal portraits in Epcot and Magic Kingdom

3) requested Regina from DPS- some of our best shots are ones she took.

4)Not paid extra for transportation to the DP. I debated long and hard on this. Walk to the gateway from the lobby of the Boardwalk hotel or have everyone bussed to Epcot. We decided to walk it, saving us quite a bit of money and resulting in lots of funny moments with people yelling congratulations etc. to us. I was worried that our guests would be upset by the walking but it wasn't a long walk, and they enjoyed the attention from the crowds. Plus, it gave us a chance to walk off some of that food!

5) Customized the menus. Not only for the DP but also our luncheon in the attic. If it hadn't been for the Disboards I wouldn't have known to do that though!

 

[Ember]

I would have been less generous with my wedding party. That probably sounds mean, but we paid for their flights, hotels, and park passes and it was the only part of the wedding that really stressed me out. One didn't like the airline I was booking flights on (not enough leg room), one changes their mind about how long they wanted to say after I had everything booked... And then 2 out of 5 never actually said thank you.

I would also have worked out transportation a little more.

And I would have complained about my MK photo shoot. The pictures were terrible, they bought me the wrong bouquet so I was without one for most of the shoot (not a big deal, but I did pay an extra $75 to have it there), and TY was quite rude in his comments about us not using Disney Photography for the wedding. I will finally get the high res CD this year and I'm really hoping that some serious post processing will help to make me not want to cry when I look at them.

This probably makes it sound like I wasn't thrilled with my wedding, which simply isn't true. These are just the things I would change.

 

[Beep]

The only thing I would have done differently was to make sure I took pictures of how I wanted my hair and make-up. I had emailed them to the people I had booked but she didn't have them with her on the day and hadn't seen them.

My make-up and hair turned out ok but it wasn't how I wanted it, and trying to explain to her that I wanted it to look like a celeb from the UK that she had never heard off didn't really work.

 

[brer rabbit 28]

The only thing I would have done differently was to make sure I took pictures of how I wanted my hair and make-up. I had emailed them to the people I had booked but she didn't have them with her on the day and hadn't seen them.

My make-up and hair turned out ok but it wasn't how I wanted it, and trying to explain to her that I wanted it to look like a celeb from the UK that she had never heard off didn't really work.

That's a great tip Beep. Must remember that one.

 

[kirstyc822]

WOW, this is a brilliant thread, thanks so much everyone that posted their Do's and Dont's its really helped me in my planning, I have taken lots of notes!

 

[HopefulDisneyBride]

Glad I Did

- Randy Chapman - loved him!
- Beaute Speciale - I was extremely happy with my hair and make up and so were the girls in my wedding party.
- Tulle Canopy for Reception Room - I had some doubts about this and whether it was worth the cost. I ended up choosing this over the Cinderella Coach. It was gorgeous - totally transformed our ballroom.
- Uplighting for Reception Room - Another thing I debated cutting due to the cost. It made the room look AMAZING! The whole ballroom had a bluish/purple glow - it was better than I imagined.
- Aisle runner - this was a last minute addition and I think it made a big impact
- Upgraded linens - again helped transform the ballroom


Glad I didn't Do
- Heavy rose petal sprinkling down aisle - I had the cheapest option, which was "bare". It added enough of the effect for what I was looking for. The price they charged for the petals, I was really glad I didn't do a heavier scattering
- Cinderella Coach - this was a hard decision for me. I debated getting this up until 2 weeks before the wedding. I opted to not get it due to cost. It ended up being 90 degrees outside the day of our wedding, so it would have been really hot. Also, I didn't find this out until after the ceremony, but my husband had never rode in a limo before, so he was really excited to have that. For me personally, I was happy that I put the money into reception decor and don't feel like I missed out on anything


Things I did, but wish I didn't do
-welcome bags - they were a pain in the butt to do, and way more work was put into them than people appreciated
-newsletter - same as above and like a prior poster said, we still got asked all of the same questions

 

[Bride-to-be]

My sisters wedding was Saturday. It really made me think about two big things that nobody ever mentions. Once I finish my TR I will go into a lot of detail but for now ~

1) If something isn't perfect - speak up. Even during the wedding and the reception SAY SOMETHING. If you don't you will really regret it later.

2) If you go into the wedding thinking everything is going to be perfect you are going to be crushed when it's not. After talking to a lot of brides I have learned that there is always a glitch or two. You just have to keep in mind that even though everything in your mind is simple and easy and its going to be amazing. It doesn't always work the way you think. At Disney there are so many different people behind the scenes involved that you really have very little control. So bottom line - don't let you expectations get too high and you will be really happy in the end.

 

[Boardwalk_bride]

I am going to elaborate on this in my TR, but my 2 big things I would change about my wedding would be:

1. Have a Wishes instead of an Escape


2. Not have a bridal party

I'll explain more on both in my TR, but my advice to people contemplating either the above things would be to have a wishes, and not have a bridal party. I still love my wedding though