Advice Please!! My child may have ADD.

[princessmom29]

I never said that my kids are not learning what they need to learn. Personally I don't think education happens only in school. It is my job to see my kids get a good education not the schools. It is my job to parent my children not the schools.

The OP was wanting advice. I was just telling my experience without medicating my kids.

If you cannot trust your child's teachers to provide effective guidance and truly have your child's best interests at heart mabye they are in the wrong school. I say this because as an educator I see it as impossible to teach children all day without taking on at least some of the roles of a parent. Like it or not you surrender some of the duites of shaping the person your child will be to his/her teachers. Lots of parents have major problems accepting that fact. They dio not like the idea that anyone other than themselves should have a positive impact on their kids. I think it is often a control issue.

Teachers really do know your children. At least the good ones do. They spend eight hours a day with them, and most of them make the recommendation that your child be evaluated or treated not because the want to "label your child" or because they don't like that they are "outside the box", but because they are truly concerned about your child and want to see them succeed. I get really tired sometimes of hearing parents say that the schools and teachers are self serving and just want to pigeonhole kids. If you children are in a school that is truly like that, you should consider moving them. I truly care about the students I teach and want to see them be the best that they can be. When I suggest that a parent talk to a doctor I do so out of concern for a child and because I have observed warning signs that concern me. I am NOT qualified to diagnose a child, but I have been trained as to what to look for in a child as ADD/ ADHD warning signs that signal that they should be professionally evaluated.

It is my experience that some children are not helped by medication, but some children significantly improve on meds. If I were faced with an ADD/ADHD diagnosis for my daughter an meds could help my child function better in school and have more positive interaction with peers, you can bet I would at least try them.

 

[CocoJ]

When my son was in first grade, his teacher starting talking about ADHD. We finally figured out he has sensory integration disorder and he needs to move to think. Also, we "simplified" his diet: no processed foods and no blue food dye. I can always tell when he's had blue food dye: he's out of control. Luckily, at age 9 he's able to read food labels and stays away from blue/green colored foods.

On the flip side, as a school nurse, I realize sometimes meds are truly necessary. The thing about the ADD/ADHD meds is that you will know very quickly if they work or if they don't. There are meds without the decreased appetite side effect.

Good luck. Definitely look outside the school system for testing.

 

[Leajess99]

Good luck. Definitely look outside the school system for testing.

When we lived in Kansas my son's teacher said she was concerned about his focusing in class. I mentioned ADHD (my son had already been diagnosed but we were doing behavioral modification and meds as a last resort) and she said she was not telling me he had ADHD or anything like that. I later found out from her that they cannot tell a parent that they fear a child may have ADHD as then the school would be responsible for paying for the testing. I did not notify the school when we moved in what my child's diagnosis was just because the school he came from wanted him diagnosed and on medicine even though at the time he was not really hyper or disruptive. He was bored as he was in a class where 95% of the class was either below or on grade level and he was in that 5% that was above level. The teacher had to work to help the ones below so the ones above were pretty much forgotten about. then when his teacher medically retired and they placed the reading specialists in the class they forgot about Math pretty much. I was so glad when we moved from that school as the principal even told me if I wanted anything done for my child I ha to place him on medicine. Moving to a new school district where his teacher knew nothing and got to see and make a decision based off my child was great. His teacher had never even looked at his school records until AFTER the school year was over and then she said she had never seen some of the things the old school had placed in his record.

 

[HelloChum]

I just think that he is lazy and had rather be doing something else. He just hates to read, plain & simple. He is not a bad reader, just slower than they want and when they take a test on a story, it's a hit & miss as to what he can answer. In his defense, the questions are about the reason the author wrote the story, what is the genera of the story, and things like that. Not to mention, he can't bring the story home to read. They say it's more of a "true" test score because the parents can't drill the story into the kids. Whatever.

I also HATE these words per minute test that they give. They are making them speed read, so it's no wonder they can't comprehend anything. He has to be reading over 90 words a minute by the end of the year. He has really improved, but still has a way to go because he is in the 70's.

They say that he is passing but they are worried about him next year. Third grade in much harder, and I do remember that from my other two children. I absolutely dread it.

I know that you are frustrated...be careful labeling your son "lazy"...he may be very frustrated at not being able to keep up with his class mates and his self esteem may suffer. You need to be his number one advocate.

I have no idea what his diagnosis may be...it does sound similar to dyslexia...you may want to do some reading on that as well. Sally Shaywitz has a great book "Overcoming Dyslexia". If it is dyslexia...the sooner he gets specialized reading help, the better. It sounds like he does have a problem with comprehension and past 2nd/3rd grade, children are no longer learning to read in school...they are reading to learn (science, social studies, etc.) and his comprehension and ability to pull out pertinent info will be very important.

Check out the website LDOnline...it has great info...you may want to see what tests the school plans to do to make sure that it is encompassing enough.

Good Luck.

 

[notsosnowwhite]

There are a variety of ADD drugs. I have worked with students using at least 12 different types of medication. ADD can have a very broad range of symptoms and there are a variety of treatments. It is very important to have a good relationship with your doctor so that situations such as several described above can be avoided. I would only work with a doctor that I felt listened to me and truly understood my child so that we could work together to find a treatment. I have seen several students who are successful with behavior therapy and diet. I also have seen students that are genuinely happy and settled once the appropriate medication has been found.

As a teacher and a parent I know that medication would be my absolute last choice. But it is a very helpful tool for a large group of students and helps them adjust, especially in the elementary years. It is not fair to label it as the wrong choice for all - each child is different.

 

[SmallWorld71]

When my son was in first grade, his teacher starting talking about ADHD. We finally figured out he has sensory integration disorder and he needs to move to think.

SID and ADHD can appear very similar but require very different treatments. I had mentioned in a previous post about my nephew's school pushing him to get treatment for ADHD when infact he had SID. For anyone wanting to learn more about SID, I recommend the book, "The Out of Sync Child."

 

[Miss LD]

Thank you again for all of the responses. It's very interesting to read what others have been through and what has and has not worked for you.

My DH and I both agreed to have further testing done for him. He thinks that this would be wise, because he may not be ADD, but instead have a learning disability. I'm also not totally against giving him meds, if it will help him, but I had rather go with changing the diet first and see how that works. When I called the Dr's office yesterday and asked the nurse about the diet, she said that she thought it was a high protein, low starch diet, but she is checking for me. I am just ready to get in to see him and see what he says.

I know in the past he has said that Fish Oil is great for kids to help them focus. I bought some pills, but they are huge & my son wont take them. I need to find some for children.

I'm going through something similar right now.
DS is almost 5, and though we started seeing some problems around age 2, by last year at this time we knew there was a problem that went beyond normal 4 year old boy stuff.
We've spent the past year looking into it, trying to figure out what to do and how to manage it.
LOTS of people were jumping to tell us what was wrong, and we have heard everything from autism/aspergers to SPD to ADHD to everything's fine.
Over the summer we went to both our family doctor and a naturopath. Our doctor encouraged us to look into alternative solutions (diet, fish oils, supplements) with our naturopath and asked us to keep her updated as we did this.
I was home on mat leave so it was the perfect time to do an "elimination diet" which was basically no dairy, eggs, milk, wheat and certain fruits veggies, and no processed foods.
That was our first step. Basically we ruled out any allergies, but discovered that if he had processed meats/stuff with nitrates he had some major issues. I didn't feel that eliminating them solved all of our problems, but it did make a big difference.
Sugar didn't really (though we continue to limit it)
After that we did supplements. We noticed a big difference, but we still had some major issues - particularly hyperactivity and impulsivity.
When he started jk we spoke to his teacher and she has been really involved with us. When he started school (after about a month to get adjusted) we started the process of testing him for ADHD. We felt that his behaviour was still a problem, and the teacher did also. By the 2nd week of school she was already implementing all the behavioural tactics that she uses for kids who have been diagnosed with ADHD.
After several months and a lot of testing, our psychologist confirmed that DS has ADHD (combined). he has recommended medication. We're still on the fence.
The things I have learned are that
a)the teacher cannot diagnose. She made it very clear from day 1 that she will help but she is not a medical professional. Even though she knows ADHD really well she drew the line and schools must
b) look at all your options. Since medication has been recommended we've asked to be referred to a pediatrician who specializes in ADHD. I still feel uncomfortable about meds, but his impulsivity scares the crap out of me.
c) It can be expensive. we've spent about $3000 on testing/naturopaths, etc on top of what our insurance pays.
d) You need to educate yourself. It's a lot easier to meet with a doctor knowing what medications and options they are talking about, and the risks that you are worried about. The more research I did, the more I discovered, to my surprise, that there are a lot of medication options and I'm willing to try them.

Good luck with all of it. But, don't let yourself be pressured. I was pretty angry when I was told by our psychologist that DS won't change without medication and it's our only option. It is an option and one we're considering, but ultimately it's our choice. we've been looking at this diagnosis as a team approach to my son's health, and quite honestly if a doctor isn't willing to consider a natural approach as a support I move on.