A man walks into a bar....

[RvUsa]

[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A guy walks into a bar with a newt on his shoulder. "What do you call that?", asks the bartender. "I call him Tiny, because he's my newt!"[/FONT]

 

[RvUsa]

[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A mushroom walks into a bar and the bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." and the mushroom says - "Why not? I'm a fungi."[/FONT]

 

[Rhonda]

[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A guy walks into a bar with a newt on his shoulder. "What do you call that?", asks the bartender. "I call him Tiny, because he's my newt!"[/FONT]

This one took me a few seconds.....

A guy walks into a bar and there is a horse behind the bar serving drinks. The guy is just staring at the horse, when the horse says, "What are you staring at? Haven't you ever seen a horse serving drinks before?" The guy says, "No, I never thought the parrot would sell the place."

 

[AuburnJen92]

A man walks into a bar. OUCH! You would have thought he would have seen it.

 

[Born 2 Fish]

An Irishman walks out of a bar.
Hey, it COULD happen !

 

[BRDof3]

An Irishman walks out of a bar.
Hey, it COULD happen !

 

[RvUsa]

[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A horse walks into a bar, across the room, up the back wall, across the ceiling, down the front wall and then up to the bar. The bartender gives the horse a beer, he drinks it and leaves. A guy sitting at the bar looks perplexed and asks the bartender "Hey, what's that all about?" The bartender replies, "Don't take it personally, he never says 'Hi' to anyone."[/FONT]

 

[RvUsa]

[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A guy walks into a bar with jumper cables. The bartender says, "You can come in, but don't start anything!"[/FONT]

 

[RvUsa]

[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A man walks into a bar and says, "Give me a beer before problems start!" Again, the man orders a beer again saying, "Give me a beer before problems start!" The bartender looks confused. This goes on for a while, and after the fifth beer the bartender is totally confused and asks the man, "When are you going to pay for these beers?" The man answers, "Ah, now the problems start!"[/FONT]

 

[jriae2000]

A big game hunter in Africa hears a noise in the bushes so he peeks through. Standing just on the other side is a huge elephant who sees the hunter, picks him up and swallows him.

The hunter says to himself how will I ever get out. He thinks about it and thinks about it and then stands up and starts running. He runs and he runs all day long. Know how he got out?

He just kept running till he was all pooped out.

 

[RvUsa]

[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A man goes into a bar with a giraffe, they both get a couple of rounds in. When they get up to leave they're extremely drunk and the giraffe passes out and falls over. The man opens the door, about to leave by himself, when the bartender stops him suddenly and says, "Hey! You can't leave that lyin' there!" The man turns around and slurs, "Don't be silly, that's not a lion, that's a giraffe!"[/FONT]

 

[RvUsa]

[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]
A man runs into a bar and asks the barkeep, "Give me ten shots of your best whisky." The bartender sets up the ten glasses. The man starts drinking them as quickly as the bartender serves them. The bartender asks, "Why are you drinking so fast?" "You'd drink fast too, if you had what I have." The bartender asks, "What do you have?" "Seventy cents."[/FONT]

 

[RvUsa]

[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A pig goes into a bar and orders ten drinks. He finishes them up and the bartender says, "Don't you need to know where the bathroom is?" The pig says, "No, I go wee wee wee all the way home." [/FONT]

 

[Gatordad]

[FONT=Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]A guy walks into a bar with jumper cables. The bartender says, "You can come in, but don't start anything!"[/FONT]

c'mon, no repeats of jokes John.

 

[Gatordad]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FfMUwCKtWMI

 

[RvUsa]

c'mon, no repeats of jokes John.

Take it to email!!!!

 

[jriae2000]

An older man and his wife are watching tv. She looks at him and says hey do you want to run up stairs and make love? He looks at her and says now you know I can only do one or the other.

 

[bankgirl05]

WHAT??? No BLONDE jokes??? or are they just too easy?

 

[BRDof3]

WHAT??? No BLONDE jokes??? or are they just too easy?

Nope, just too dangerous.

 

[Born 2 Fish]

Rvusa.org,,John's site,,on the joke thread,,PLENTY of blonde jokes,