6 Days Before Our Trip, DH Just Left Me

[TheDisneyBunch]

I sure wish I had some advice for you but just wanted to offer you some BIG ((HUGS)) and my support. I know this must be so hard for you right now. I can not imagine. I think you should still go to Disney. You need it and so will the kids. I understand the long drive will be scarey. My dh is the one who always does the driving when we go for long drives and I would be scared to do it alone but you know the kids would love to go. I hope that this is just something your dh is going through and will come to his senses and come back. I am so sorry again!

 

[rileyroosmom]

My dad is the one who told me to check the money. He also said to move it but it seems so harsh, so final. I don't think he would take the money but I also thought he'd never leave us.

It just amazes me that "he's not happy" and ups and leaves 3 kids. Well, what if I'm not happy to0. Do I just leave the kids alone?

He has always been a great, great father and husband. VERY involved (we were just at a parent/teacher confrence on Thursday) goes to all the baseball games and school events. Just took my sons to Sports Authority tonight to buy all new baseball stuff.

Still can't reach him. Also tried to reach his brother to see if he knows anything. Can't reach the brother, they don't have a phone in the bedroom - they like to sleep......hello! what about emergencies!!

Seems crazy to be thinking of a trip right now. We are suppose to be meeting his brother and his family there - we have a Grand Gathering. How strange would it be to vacation with them? I think I have to take the kids - It just wouldn't be fair to them. One of us has to be the adult here and think of the kids. I was just checking airfare and thinking of flying my sister (she's single) in from NY and she could drive down with us. This late in the game a ticket is $500 but maybe it's worth it.

My other two will be devastated in the morning. My second son just turned 9 and my daughter is 5. My son has had a lot of obstacles. He had to be retained back to 1st grade when we moved here. School is really a struggle for him. He got glasses this year and June 16th he is getting braces. Now this. How is a little boy suppose to handle all that?? He's been talking to the school counselor to help with his self esteem - his father walking out will really help with that.

I begged my husband to stay - for the kids - he refused. I feel like i"m going to be sick. My body feels on fire and every bone is hurting.

 

[DISUNC]

TO YOUR FAMILY! PRAYERS ARE BEING SAID!

PLEASE CALL YOUR SISTER OR ANY FRIEND NOW!!!!! DONT WORRY ABOUT THE TIME.

 

[kapica3]

I think you were right when you said you don't think he'll take the $ but then again you didn't think he would leave you guys either. Do your kids a favor and move the money yourself, before he does. Obviously he has proved that the unexpected should now be expected.

I think its a great idea to get your sister in from NY. That would be a great boost for your moral support andy also nice for the kids.

You should take a few advil or something for your body aches, and maybe some herbal tea with milk and try to get some rest to be able to go on with your day tommorow.

Remember to try not to say anything bad about him in front of the kids, and stress that he left because of his own problem not because of you or the kids.

 

[CrazyChik]

Aaaaww i'm so sorry

 

[ShadowKittyKat]

You know you can get through this, and all of the suggestions above do not need to be repeated.

 

[kapica3]

Don't know if this helps... but I just tried to look up better airfare for your sister to come and join you and also checked Amtrak. From NY the fares are high to Georgia (didn't know where to check so I checked JFK to Atlanta) and Amtrak is just about $100 cheaper and much more of a hassle. I know you said that you didn't want to drive alone but could your dad possibly drive back with you to Florida? Because Jet Blue airline has a flight this tuesday from newark, NJ (near manhattan) for $149 to orlando and return on June 4 for just $99. They don't fly from here to Georgia. But if she could meet you in Orlando you could save about $300.

 

[roseprincess]

 

[debden]

OH so sorry this has happened to you.Call your sis no matter what the hour...
I would certainly want my sister to call!
Sometimes it takes being apart to make people appreciate what they have.
Maybe your dh just needs some time to sort things out.Give him the space he needs.You never know he may just end up knocking at your door asking you to take him back.It certainly is a possibility.
Hugs to you and your children.I know you'll be OK no matter what the outcome.
Debbie

 

[Quinn222]

OMG

But, Take the money! Seriously. I know you think he wouldn't do such a thing but so does everyone else and it happens all the time. Do what you have to do and do it first thing in the morning.

 

[Marseeya]

Oh my goodness, you poor thing.

Yes, take some money -- leave some for him, but take money. Your first responsibility right now is towards those kids and yourself. As for the trip, you say it's with his family? Wow, that's difficult. But a lot can happen in just six days, so play it by ear.

And more hugs for you.

 

[debden]

Thanks everyone. I can't call a friend, we recently moved to Georgia from NY and it would just be too strange calling from so far away in the middle of the night. I hope it is a midlife crisis. He definately is not the man I've know for 20 years. I've tried calling his cell, but he's not picking up.
My son tells me my dh told him I'd take them to Disney on Thursday myself. I don't know if I have it in me. My dh has totally taken care of me through the years, I'm embarrased to say I'd be too afraid to drive the 7 hours myself. Any advice, do you think I should still go? I feel like I'm in the Twilight Zone. My head is in so many places at once. I don't want to give any more pain to my kids by telling them their father left and they aren't going on their trip. I can't believe he has done this to them! I just checked our banking on line and he hasn't taken money, I'm just reeling! Thanks for the support

I agree with the above posters.Take the money out of your account.You'll need it.And if you can't drive the 7 hours maybe you can find alternate transportation?? Maybe a bus,train.....
I know it's difficult to think of anything right now in the state your in but everything will work out for the best.
Keep a stiff upper lip and trudge forward the best you can.
Good Luck.
Debbie

 

[Rootskate]

I am really sorry you have to deal with this. Keep your chin up.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I am so sorry for you & your family in this difficult time.

 

[PaulaSue]

(((HUGS)))

 

[Virgo10]

Wow, I am so sorry but I've BTDT. 1983, 2 kids ages 8 and 6, 11 years of marriage. Looking back, things had been bad between us for some time but I still didn't expect it. He also said there was no one else which turned out to be a lie.

Take the money. Offer to meet him half way on counseling. If he doesn't go for that in a reasonable amount of time, get a lawyer. YMMV but within two weeks of my Ex leaving, I felt alive for the first time in years.

You'll be in my thoughts.

 

[PixiePop]

I just wanted to say how sorry I am.

 

[crazyme5kids]

Oh I'm so sorry.

 

[disneylizzy]

So sorry. Just my advice, but tell the kids that daddy just needs some time to think for a little while. He can do more explaining to them. Keep everything as routine as possible for them. Do call your sister, you need support and you don't want the kids to see you falling apart. Hmmm... WDW with his family.. what is your relationship like with them? Will they be supportive of you?

Having been there (2 years ago), I understand the shock, unreality of your situation. Of course it came out of the blue to you, it did to me, too. Come to find out, my husband had been mulling this over for a year, thinking about it, deciding, making plans, etc. Try for counseling, it may not get you back together, but it might help.

Always, always take the high road. Your children will thank you for it. Again, I am so, so sorry.

 

[chris1gill]

I'm sorry

Now, if that vacation is paid for, I'd take it! Especially for your 12 year old, what possessed your husband to just tell the 12 year old right out of left field like that??

So glad your father is coming today to be with you.....