1 Year after a relatives wedding & still no thank you...WWYD?

[tuckerkeys]

I'm just curious on what you guys would do in my situation...

My cousin got married last year. I gave a gift of money ( $150 to be exact ) 1 year has come and gone & I still have not gotten any thank you. no email, card, nothing. She did cash my check promptly tho after her wedding

In October, she also had her 1st baby. Yes, she was preggo while she was getting married, call it what you may. Anyway I sent baby gifts of new clothing, I'd say at least $75 worth of items all through the toddler years. I also included a few hand me downs that my daughter used that were too cute to just do away with. I know she got them b/c my Aunt commented to my mom how cute everything was. Yeah, no thank you for these gifts either. My mom did casually say something to my aunt, who then said my couz. sent me an email, thanking me for the gifts. I never got said email....

Anyway, should I mention to my cousin that I think it's in poor taste that I never got any thank you's? Her mom tells my mom she's VERY busy. Yeah, well so am I, WAIT so is the entire WORLD! She's a normal girl, nothing weird or anything regarding her situation. I guess she's just lazy? It just disappoints me I went out of my way & nothing.......

 

[DisTeach1]

No, I wouldn't say anything NOW, however, I would not give another gift for any occasion, nor would I attend the occasions. When asked why, I would tell the truth.

 

[happygirl]

I'm just curious on what you guys would do in my situation...

My cousin got married last year. I gave a gift of money ( $150 to be exact ) 1 year has come and gone & I still have not gotten any thank you. no email, card, nothing. She did cash my check promptly tho after her wedding

In October, she also had her 1st baby. Yes, she was preggo while she was getting married, call it what you may. Anyway I sent baby gifts of new clothing, I'd say at least $75 worth of items all through the toddler years. I also included a few hand me downs that my daughter used that were too cute to just do away with. I know she got them b/c my Aunt commented to my mom how cute everything was. Yeah, no thank you for these gifts either. My mom did casually say something to my aunt, who then said my couz. sent me an email, thanking me for the gifts. I never got said email....

Anyway, should I mention to my cousin that I think it's in poor taste that I never got any thank you's? Her mom tells my mom she's VERY busy. Yeah, well so am I, WAIT so is the entire WORLD! She's a normal girl, nothing weird or anything regarding her situation. I guess she's just lazy? It just disappoints me I went out of my way & nothing.......

No, I wouldn't say anything.

 

[gina2000]

I would positively, absolutely do nothing. I'd move on. I don't sweat the small stuff.

 

[MIGrandma]

No, I wouldn't say anything NOW, however, I would not give another gift for any occasion, nor would I attend the occasions. When asked why, I would tell the truth.

This is exactly what I would do as well.

 

[surfergirl602]

I would positively, absolutely do nothing. I'd move on. I don't sweat the small stuff.

I agree!!! I don't remember the last time I got a thank you card. I don't let it eat me up. I really don't think its that big a deal.

 

[es45]

While it was impolite not to thank you, remember that gifts should be given without expecting anything in return. I understand your expectation of what is common courtesy but you should let it go.

 

[ICF]

let it go....

 

[dislaney]

While it was impolite not to thank you, remember that gifts should be given without expecting anything in return. I understand your expectation of what is common courtesy but you should let it go.

I totally agree! You also have the option of not giving anymore gifts in the future if that is what you choose to do.

 

[Liberty Belle]

What would I do? If I knew she got the gifts, I'd do nothing. I don't give gifts for a thank you. If an occasion came again where I felt like I wanted to give a gift, I would.

Yes, she should have sent you a thank you note, but she didn't. I'd let it go.

 

[WizardLarz]

Why don't you e-mail her. Be polite, "I understand how busy you must be! Hope everything is going great with the baby! Your Cousin,........"

She just may be overwelmed!

 

[Muushka]

While it was impolite not to thank you, remember that gifts should be given without expecting anything in return. I understand your expectation of what is common courtesy but you should let it go.

How difficult is it to say 2 words, Thank You?

I have been to 3 weddings in the past 2 years. No thank you note from any of them. I have no idea if these people even got the gifts I gave them at the wedding. For all I know, they may think I didn't even get them anything.

One of the cousins (sister of 2 of the 3 non-thank-you people) is getting married this May. Nope, not going to give a gift, not going to the wedding. (in case you think this is not nice, we barely know these people).

 

[surfergirl602]

While it was impolite not to thank you, remember that gifts should be given without expecting anything in return. I understand your expectation of what is common courtesy but you should let it go.

Well said.

 

[minkydog]

She has no manners but you do. Say nothing. It will only make you look rude. I wouldn't send her another thing. Send the kids something small if you want, but I wouldn't do one more thing for her. People like that have a sense of entitlement. She doesn't see any reason to send thank you notes and she's not going to change her ways now. Let it go.

 

[smschex]

While it was impolite not to thank you, remember that gifts should be given without expecting anything in return. I understand your expectation of what is common courtesy but you should let it go.

I agree with this. Yes, she is violating several rules of etiquette, but you have no control over her behavior, so don't let it affect yours.

At least you know she did receive the gifts. The ones I worry about are the gifts that I don't have proof of receipt. What if they never received what I sent and they think I am the rude one!

 

[SKWDW]

While it was impolite not to thank you, remember that gifts should be given without expecting anything in return. I understand your expectation of what is common courtesy but you should let it go.

My thoughts exactly!

Your cousin is rude, but I wouldn't stress over it.

 

[brockash]

I'm just curious on what you guys would do in my situation...

My cousin got married last year. I gave a gift of money ( $150 to be exact ) 1 year has come and gone & I still have not gotten any thank you. no email, card, nothing. She did cash my check promptly tho after her wedding

In October, she also had her 1st baby. Yes, she was preggo while she was getting married, call it what you may. Anyway I sent baby gifts of new clothing, I'd say at least $75 worth of items all through the toddler years. I also included a few hand me downs that my daughter used that were too cute to just do away with. I know she got them b/c my Aunt commented to my mom how cute everything was. Yeah, no thank you for these gifts either. My mom did casually say something to my aunt, who then said my couz. sent me an email, thanking me for the gifts. I never got said email....

Anyway, should I mention to my cousin that I think it's in poor taste that I never got any thank you's? Her mom tells my mom she's VERY busy. Yeah, well so am I, WAIT so is the entire WORLD! She's a normal girl, nothing weird or anything regarding her situation. I guess she's just lazy? It just disappoints me I went out of my way & nothing.......

WWID?? I'd get over it. I mean it's been a year, let it go. I'm sure she didn't mean anything by not remembering to thank you, so I wouldn't let it offend me. I definetely wouldn't say anything to her, because that's even ruder than her not remembering to send a thank you IMO. If you're so upset about it all a year later, maybe you should just stop sending her things for these types of occasions (since you're obviously not just giving them without looking for something in return,) or maybe just send a card from now on wishing her the best.

 

[DVC~OKW~96]

It is extremely bad manners to not thank someone for a gift. Period. It's not a matter of giving a gift with the hope of getting a thank you.

It's a matter of caring enough to send a gift at all. Period.

That she has horrible manners does not of course, mean you get to point it out.

If you give her another gift, you would be reinforcing the rude behavior.

Take care now! May the rest of your gifts go to people with good manners!

 

[Acklander]

The only manners I concern myself with are my own, and those of my children. So, no - I wouldn't do anything - that's not my place.

 

[Christine]

Considering that there has not be ONE acknowledgement of your gifts, I would never get her another gift. I don't care how someone thanks me--it doesn't need to be a formal letter/card; however, some type of e-mail or anything is warranted. You have gotten NOTHING. Especially for the baby clothes. I mean, really, how hard is it to pick up the phone and tell you how cute they were. If she didn't want to do that there is e-mail.