And don't call me sweetie

[wvjules]

You being on the phone was probably super annoying to her too..

I doubt she noticed. I had in the earpiece while I was listening to the elevator music. She probably didn't even know I was on the phone. When I finally got to a person I went outside.

ETA: I wasn't offended. I was annoyed. There is a difference.

 

[mhsjax]

I doubt she noticed. I had in the earpiece while I was listening to the elevator music. She probably didn't even know I was on the phone. When I finally got to a person I went outside.

ETA: I wasn't offended. I was annoyed. There is a difference.

So annoyed that you wanted to "slap her"? I would hate to see you if you were really ticked off.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

Out of all of the things wrong in the entire world, I think being called "sweetie" is not something worth being annoyed about.

 

[shortbun]

Never said that they meant anything bad by it. However, it still annoys me. Stick with Sir or Ma'am. No need to be all cutesy with me. I'm a customer.

And yes, I'm aware I'm well on my way to being a crotchety old lady.

I hate it too! Low class, too familiar and boundaryless. Let's stick with polite conversation when I don't know you-ok? I am NOT your honey or sweetie!

 

[happygirl]

I hate it too! Low class, too familiar and boundaryless. Let's stick with polite conversation when I don't know you-ok? I am NOT your honey or sweetie!

How is it low class

 

[turkeymama]

Can't speak for where you live, and don't know where it is, but it definitely isn't a fad in south LA. It is as deeply ingrained in our conversations as *y'all*. I love it, doesn't bother me a bit. There are certainly worse things to be called

Agree, it's not an appropriate professor/student exchange. Never heard of that before. Sounds like someone trying to be cutesy and failing.

Not a fad up here in north Louisiana either. I've heard it all my life. My mom can't stand it. Personally, I like it. And I agree about the professor/student thing. Just forced and inappropriate.

 

[WowLookAtThat]

I admit I was usually called "Miss" in my home state and my grandfather (from Alabama) would use "Darlin' ". I was called "Angel", "Sweetheart", "Honey" and "Ma'am" for the first time in Georgia and I didn't find it a problem. At first it was weird, not bad weird but just unexpected to be called those terms but I felt like it was nothing to be annoyed about. I kind of thought it was sweet.

 

[beatlesblonde]

It's funny because being called "sweetie", "honey", "darling", "sugar" ect annoys me too, but I'm usually being called it by my customers not the other way around. I'm wearing a name tag, read it. If my back it turned feel free to use ma'am or miss. I'm not in the south and I work in a predominately male work environment and most of the time it comes off as flirty and I don't find it flattering at all (and my husband doesn't either )

 

[PizzieDuster]

I do the opposite. I'm the one who says it too much to a server (on the phone).

If I order a to go on the phone, I always say "thank you sweetie for all your help!" Then I immediately wanna slap myself on the forehead. I don't know why I do it, I'm just always glad they help me out with my order (especially if I forget the sides). I never do it in person, just over the phone. Go figure.

 

[indimom]

It's all in the intent for me. If I feel like I'm being talked down to, I'm going to be annoyed. If it's just a friendly/kind tone or greeting, I've got no problem with it.

Just from this thread, it seems like we should allow some slack. After you remove all the "titles" listed in this thread that offend people, there's not much left to call a person when you don't know their name.

 

[bunkkinsmom]

I have called people terms of endearment names my entire life. When I was a bartender, I called people that until I could remember their names. My children are taught to say Please and Thank You and Ma'am and Sir. The thought that honey or sweetie would offend someone is so foreign to me. I do have a couple of Starbucks stories about it:

I had a regular customer that came in daily and one day he was SUPER early, like still dark outside. He walked in and I said "Good Morning Sunshine! Grande coffee today?" He looked me straight in the eye and said "Not one minute of my life has ever been sunshine. Don't call me that." I just said the first thing that came to my head....... which was, "Oh, that's awful! I'm so sorry for you! Do you need room for cream?"

Second story is much worse, and I have to say that I really wanted to get loud but I didn't. I just removed my employee from the situation. I had a long time employee who travelled extensively and worked for Starbucks in other states and countries. Her home base was my store. She had just gotten back from about 8 months in Scotland, and for some reason had picked up the phrase "My Lady". A woman in her 60's came in with a problem with a purchase. She wasn't irate or agitated, just wanted the problem handled. Well my employee said "I am so sorry about that My Lady, I'll be happy to fix it for you". The woman FLIPPED OUT! She started yelling at my employee saying, "Don't you be condescending to me! I am not YOUR LADY! Don't you speak to me that way!" My employee started apologizing and I interrupted. "You don't need to apologize, you didn't do anything wrong. Go on and head to the back and I'll take care of this." I said it calmly and not angrily. When my employee went to the back, I fixed the problem and they left. Meanwhile my employee is a train wreck in the back room. I told her to shake it off, we don't know what happened to that customer before she walked in the door. I had to reassure her that she didn't do anything wrong. Over "My Lady"?

 

[chiefmickeymouse]

My parents are from North Carolina and I grew up saying "ma'am" and "sir". I still say it without thinking even though I'm in my 40's. I don't mind being called honey or sweetheart as long as it isn't condescending. I DO mind being called "Mom" by every doctor, teacher, dentist, orthodontist, etc. that my children see. I get it that they don't know my name, but I guarantee they have my name because it is on the 700 forms they just had me fill out!

 

[PebblesMK]

I hate any sort of pet names that people call me, had a boyfriend who called me "Sweetie"...put an end to that one. My brother's gf/person/idiot calls me "deer" (that's how she spells it when she texts me) all the time, so I interrupt her with "HUMAN". But I think I'm more bothered with it because it's usually younger people using those pet names. There is an older lady at one of the gas stations, she has a slight southern drawl and she will call everybody babydoll, sweetie, hunny, darling...and when she does it, I want nothing more than to give her a hug and make her my grandma.

I don't know what it is about the names that bothers me so much. Then again, I HATE being called ma'am, I'm barely 30, not old enough to be a ma'am yet! But I also hate when somebody will look at my ID or credit card and address me by my name. Think I'd be better off being referred to as "HEY YOU!" hahah When it comes down to it though, I really try not to make a big deal out of anything and won't try to correct somebody, I'm annoyed for that moment and then move on just as quickly.

 

[North of Mouse]

It's funny because being called "sweetie", "honey", "darling", "sugar" ect annoys me too, but I'm usually being called it by my customers not the other way around. I'm wearing a name tag, read it. If my back it turned feel free to use ma'am or miss. I'm not in the south and I work in a predominately male work environment and most of the time it comes off as flirty and I don't find it flattering at all (and my husband doesn't either )

That sounds like an entirely different situation and 'meant' differently.

 

[North of Mouse]

I hate any sort of pet names that people call me, had a boyfriend who called me "Sweetie"...put an end to that one. My brother's gf/person/idiot calls me "deer" (that's how she spells it when she texts me) all the time, so I interrupt her with "HUMAN". But I think I'm more bothered with it because it's usually younger people using those pet names. There is an older lady at one of the gas stations, she has a slight southern drawl and she will call everybody babydoll, sweetie, hunny, darling...and when she does it, I want nothing more than to give her a hug and make her my grandma.

I don't know what it is about the names that bothers me so much. Then again, I HATE being called ma'am, I'm barely 30, not old enough to be a ma'am yet! But I also hate when somebody will look at my ID or credit card and address me by my name. Think I'd be better off being referred to as "HEY YOU!" hahah When it comes down to it though, I really try not to make a big deal out of anything and won't try to correct somebody, I'm annoyed for that moment and then move on just as quickly.

Ummm, even your boyfriend couldn't call you 'Sweetie'? Would hate to run into you anywhere then, because I wouldn't know how to address you that would not offend.

 

[TinkerBelled]

I didn't the first time it happened because I was so shocked and I really didn't want to hurt the student's feelings, but now I have a standard response that I use to let them know that it's not appropriate...I smile nicely and in a very polite tone I say....

"You're very nice to call me that, but I think it's best if you refer to me as Dr. xxxxxx since that's what the other students call me."

Hopefully, this gets the point across without me offending them. I know they are just trying to be nice, but they need to know that it's not always appropriate to use these terms.

That is a lot more civil than many professors I know would be--including my aunt, who I think would just glare at them like Maggie Smith (of whom she reminds me, very much). I can't decide if it's a reflection of the entitlement of today's college students or the still-difficult role of women in academia.

Your response is very graceful and kind. If I were a professor, I think I would react in the same way you did the first time, but I couldn't promise that an incredulous "excuse me?" wouldn't pop out of my mouth by accident.

 

[dizcrazee]

That is a lot more civil than many professors I know would be--including my aunt, who I think would just glare at them like Maggie Smith (of whom she reminds me, very much). I can't decide if it's a reflection of the entitlement of today's college students or the still-difficult role of women in academia.

Your response is very graceful and kind. If I were a professor, I think I would react in the same way you did the first time, but I couldn't promise that an incredulous "excuse me?" wouldn't pop out of my mouth by accident.

Hi TinkerBelled, thanks for saying my response was kind - that's what I was aiming for. I really don't think the girls meant any disrespect. Like I said, calling everyone "sweetie" seems to have become a campus fad at my college, especially among the female students, and I think they are just in the habit of saying it. By the way, I don't hear the male students saying it - it seems to be just the young ladies.

To the DIS friends from Louisiana that responded, you are absolultely right - I have heard this expression and others like it, especially "baby", many times down in LA...I have relatives in south LA and it is part of the culture. It's not part of the culture in my area - it just suddenly popped up for some reason...I'm not sure why.

 

[Disney Doll]

Doesn't faze me in the least. I've been a nurse for 30 years. I've been called WAY worse than Sweetie.

 

[Cannot_Wait_4Disney]

And don't call me sweetie

How bout Sugar Plum?

Honey?

Darlin?

 

[micmac727]

I hate when servers refer to you as honey, sweetie, darlin, etc. I had one at lunch today and I wanted to slap her. (It probably didn't help that I was on a 45 minute hold with the IRS. )

But in all seriousness, why do they do that? I know I can't be the only one that hates it. It's not endearing, its annoying!

How about honey boo boo?