Your Kids Doing the Soulja Boy Dance

[MyManGoofy!]

OK, I'll step up. I don't think I've posted about this particular subject yet. I'm fairly liberal and yes, I let my kids listen to Soulja Boy and other things they probably shouldn't. But it's for the music, not the lyrics. I can't imagine that any parent would really allow their kids to listen to anything. Yes, I will "censor" songs. If we're listening to a CD or satellite radio, I'll turn down the volume when a swear word comes up. And there are some songs that I will turn off completely. But as far as the regular radio goes, I pretty much let them listen to everything there. As long as I like it. If I don't like, I change the channel. With many songs, I generally don't understand what's being said, much less any vulgur or hidden meaning behind. I'm fairly sure my 3-and 6-year-olds don't either.

I am very liberal myself and I am kind of the opposite. I do not censor for swearing, but I do for content. When there is a song (like the song in the OP) that talks about degrading women or treating them with disrespect, I do not care how good the beat is - that song does not get played. Same goes for any song that glorifies abuse/intolerance/degradation of any class/group of people.

My son is a teen now, so I do have to worry that he understands the lyrics. In fact, he is the one that usually lets me in on it. But, I never underestimated his ability to "get" a message - hidden or not - no matter what his age. Because of that, I never wanted him to think that I condone these kinds messages by bopping along to the beat instead of turning them off/not buying them etc...

 

[Beth76]

I guess I just can't see singing or dancing with my DD to a song that says "ho" in it.

But on the radio, they don't say "ho" they say "oh". I don't intend to buy the CD and listen to it with my kids.

 

[JunieJay]

I am very liberal myself and I am kind of the opposite. I do not censor for swearing, but I do for content. When there is a song (like the song in the OP) that talks about degrading women or treating them with disrespect, I do not care how good the beat is - that song does not get played. Same goes for any song that glorifies abuse/intolerance/degradation of any class/group of people.

My son is a teen now, so I do have to worry that he understands the lyrics. In fact, he is the one that usually lets me in on it. But, I never underestimated his ability to "get" a message - hidden or not - no matter what his age. Because of that, I never wanted him to think that I condone these kinds messages by bopping along to the beat instead of turning them off/not buying them etc...

And see I would use this song as a stepping stone to talk about how we like this song because we like the beat, not so much its message. Which would springboard us into the discussion why the message is wrong. I'd much rather them have the discussion with me then hear the song at a school dance and left to wonder on their own what it means. They like this particular song for the dance but they think the singer is a thug.

I really don't believe in sheltering my kids...I want them to have a little experience under their belt when I set them free. I was not sheltered as a child. I've got nothing but respect for people who feel otherwise, imo we are all doing the best job we can using the tools we were taught from our own parents and drawing on our own life experience. You'll never catch me wagging my finger at someone else and the way they parent, but I do wonder those on this thread who are wagging their finger - are you teaching your children to do the same?

 

[kerrynic78]

But on the radio, they don't say "ho" they say "oh". I don't intend to buy the CD and listen to it with my kids.

I hear you. I'm so used to satellite radio where they don't censor the songs and the few times I have heard this song, they didn't say "oh". Hopefully my DD will want to listen to the Wiggles until she is 18!

 

[MyManGoofy!]

And see I would use this song as a stepping stone to talk about how we like this song because we like the beat, not so much its message. Which would springboard us into the discussion why the message is wrong. I'd much rather them have the discussion with me then hear the song at a school dance and left to wonder on their own what it means. They like this particular song for the dance but they think the singer is a thug.

I really don't believe in sheltering my kids...I want them to have a little experience under their belt when I set them free. I was not sheltered as a child. I've got nothing but respect for people who feel otherwise, imo we are all doing the best job we can using the tools we were taught from our own parents and drawing on our own life experience. You'll never catch me wagging my finger at someone else and the way they parent, but I do wonder those on this thread who are wagging their finger - are you teaching your children to do the same?

Oh believe me - there have been plenty of extremely open discussion regarding why the station was changed or why a cd could not be purchased. My child is by no means sheltered from anything. I just refuse to support those kinds of messages. For me the seriousness of the message far outweighs any kind of enjoyment I get out of "the beat".

Am I "wagging a finger". No. But I am surprised because of how conservative this boards appears to be in most other aspects that this had been treated so "Eh - I like the beat so - whatever." JMO.

 

[Mr. & Mrs. Smith]

I think this song is absolutely disgusting and completely inappropriate for kids. I'm actually surprised that more adults aren't offended by it. And I'm even more surprised that so many people listen to songs without even questioning what they are about. I have to know that lyrics of a song. That's just the way my mind works.

How about AC/DC's shook me all night long, my parents loved that song.. oh yes and for awhile my favorite song was Physical! I was about 4 running around singing that all the time!

I don't see what's wrong with either of these songs. They aren't endorsing abuse and degradation of women. Same with many of the other songs people listed here. Like She Bop. It's about ************. That's not a bad thing. Again, it's not about being sexually explicit. And for those who say, "This is nothing new," with all due respect, I completely disagree. I think this kind of disrespect in music only came around in the last couple of decades.

I'd never censor the music my kids listen to, or the books they read. My parents felt the same way. I turned out o.k. (for the most part ).

Quite a few people on this thread have said that. But isn't censorship a part of parenting? There are certain things I would hope you would shield your children from seeing. I don't imagine you would take them with you to help clean-up after a deadly car wreck so why would you let them watch one on television, for instance? Is it just the matter of trying to be "cool" parents?

Apparently he does since he turns down ALL parties where the client wants to choose their own music..and I thought that was the purpose of hiring a DJ..to hear the music you wanted to dance to lol

He didn't say that. He said he turns down parties that would require him to play music that he doesn't wish to support. Good for him for actually having standards.

I really don't believe in sheltering my kids...I want them to have a little experience under their belt when I set them free. I was not sheltered as a child.

Sheltering would imply that you are keeping them away from something that they really should learn about for the real world. I don't see how it's necessary for them to know about abusing and degrading women. If that was so important they would teach it in school. If you want to give them life experience, take them to an art gallery and show them some of the beautiful life drawings/sculptures there. Travel with them so that they get exposed to all kinds of things. I don't see how giving them access to this music does much in the way of life experience. Trust me, it's not going to help on their college applications.

 

[transparant]

I think this song is absolutely disgusting and completely inappropriate for kids. I'm actually surprised that more adults aren't offended by it. And I'm even more surprised that so many people listen to songs without even questioning what they are about. I have to know that lyrics of a song. That's just the way my mind works.



I don't see what's wrong with either of these songs. They aren't endorsing abuse and degradation of women. Same with many of the other songs people listed here. Like She Bop. It's about ************. That's not a bad thing. Again, it's not about being sexually explicit. And for those who say, "This is nothing new," with all due respect, I completely disagree. I think this kind of disrespect in music only came around in the last couple of decades.



Quite a few people on this thread have said that. But isn't censorship a part of parenting? There are certain things I would hope you would shield your children from seeing. I don't imagine you would take them with you to help clean-up after a deadly car wreck so why would you let them watch one on television, for instance? Is it just the matter of trying to be "cool" parents?



He didn't say that. He said he turns down parties that would require him to play music that he doesn't wish to support. Good for him for actually having standards.



Sheltering would imply that you are keeping them away from something that they really should learn about for the real world. I don't see how it's necessary for them to know about abusing and degrading women. If that was so important they would teach it in school. If you want to give them life experience, take them to an art gallery and show them some of the beautiful life drawings/sculptures there. Travel with them so that they get exposed to all kinds of things. I don't see how giving them access to this music does much in the way of life experience. Trust me, it's not going to help on their college applications.

 

[Kath2003]

They played it at the pub tonight, we all sang along

None of us had enough co-ordination to do the dance though!

To be honest, the idea of anyone being 'supermanned' conjures up some darn hilarious imagery...and no, it doesn't offend me as a woman. I know no one would dare even try it on me!

 

[Papa Deuce]

Apparently he does since he turns down ALL parties where the client wants to choose their own music..and I thought that was the purpose of hiring a DJ..to hear the music you wanted to dance to lol

Nope. You don't get it. I don't censor ANYTHING. You can choose to listen to whatever you want. "Artists" can create whatever they want. I just have no idea WHY a woman would want to listen to music that denigrates them.

If you were building a brick porch, would you hire a builder who doesn't build brick porches? No. You would look for one that is compatible with what you want.

As a business owner, I have the right to turn down clients that do not fit my liking in the exact same way you don't have to hire one that you don't agree with. Shame on you if you don't ask the right questions, or shame on the DJ who doesn't explain his policy.

I don't surprise my clients by just showing up and not playing music that they want to hear. We discuss it TOTALLY. And they also initial their names on the contract that they understand my policy. If they weren't OK with that, they wouldn't sign it, right?

 

[disneyjunkie]

I just have no idea WHY a woman would want to listen to music that denigrates them.

Did you ever stop to think that maybe they don't find it degrading?
I don't understand how people could have a problem with this song, but not other things that could be considered degrading to women.

(porn and the Sports Illustrated swim suit edition)

 

[Papa Deuce]

Did you ever stop to think that maybe they don't find it degrading?
I don't understand how people could have a problem with this song, but not other things that could be considered degrading to women.

(porn and the Sports Illustrated swim suit edition)

Women volunteer or are paid to do porn or be on Sports Illustrated. It is something THEY CHOOSE to do. They don't have a choice as to whether someone else wants to write a degrading somg about women, only the choice to not listen, or not be offended.

Now, if some women DON'T find it degrading, well.........

 

[disneyjunkie]

Women volunteer or are paid to do porn or be on Sports Illustrated. It is something THEY CHOOSE to do. They don't have a choice as to whether someone else wants to write a degrading somg about women, only the choice to not listen, or not be offended.

Now, if some women DON'T find it degrading, well.........

Just because they choose to do it, doesn't mean it isn't degrading.

Women choose to dance in rap videos.

Women also write and perform songs with explicit lyrics.

 

[Kath2003]

Well guess what, women (or anyone else) don't get a choice in the actions of women OR men. So if you're degraded by something - porn, sexual lyrics in songs, whatever - be degraded by it, but short of utter censorship, you can't stop it. I'm not degraded by any of it because it doesn't reflect on who I am. Just because some woman puts herself around on the internet naked, it doesn't mean that's okay for me. Just because some guy uses a, very comical, sexual term about women, it doesn't mean it's okay to do it to me. And I think people have enough common sense to realise that 3 minutes of rap music or some $7.99 porn isn't going to change women's place in society...

 

[scheddj]

Anybody listen to the Doors when they were younger? "The men don't know but the little girls understand" and "father I want to kill you, mother I want to ---- you". I'd call that a little sexually deviant and we were all listening to it.

 

[disneyjunkie]

Well guess what, women (or anyone else) don't get a choice in the actions of women OR men. So if you're degraded by something - porn, sexual lyrics in songs, whatever - be degraded by it, but short of utter censorship, you can't stop it. I'm not degraded by any of it because it doesn't reflect on who I am. Just because some woman puts herself around on the internet naked, it doesn't mean that's okay for me. Just because some guy uses a, very comical, sexual term about women, it doesn't mean it's okay to do it to me. And I think people have enough common sense to realise that 3 minutes of rap music or some $7.99 porn isn't going to change women's place in society...

 

[graygables]

And I think people have enough common sense to realise that 3 minutes of rap music or some $7.99 porn isn't going to change women's place in society...

however, if enough people had the guts to not buy or listen to it, maybe THAT would "change women's place in society". Why is it so difficult to just admit that some things are simply WRONG?

 

[Aidensmom]

We let our child watch and listen to some things that other parents we know, and even more so those on the DIS don't think is appropriate, but I have to be honest and say, I think that some parents go a bit to far with the "I'm not going to censor my kids". Kids need to be censored. That is what a parent is for.

Someone said it would be hypocritical for them to censor what their kids do because their parents didn't. Um, no, it wouldn't be hypocritical, it would be called making your own decision. It is not inherintly BAD to limit what your children can do. We don't put kids out on their own at age 8 to take care of themselves, WHY? Because we think they still need guidance. It's not bad to give it to them.

As far what this thread is concerning, nope, no way in Hell "Ho" is an acceptable concept here. Like I said, we are a bit more liberal than a lot of parents we know in what our child watches or listens to, but we do have things we consider unacceptable, and will pull the parent card and say "No". It scares me a bit that there are parents who don't.

 

[MyManGoofy!]

Sorry - it posted twice.

 

[MyManGoofy!]

however, if enough people had the guts to not buy or listen to it, maybe THAT would "change women's place in society". Why is it so difficult to just admit that some things are simply WRONG?

Exactly! It is so sad that so many do not get this.

Did you ever stop to think that maybe they don't find it degrading?
I don't understand how people could have a problem with this song, but not other things that could be considered degrading to women.

(porn and the Sports Illustrated swim suit edition)

Personally, my circle of friends (men and women) all find the things described in this song to be degrading and disrespectful to women. I am not sure that I would want to know people that think this kind of stuff is ok. Porn also fits in this category.
The swimsuit issue is a little different to me. It depends on the shot/pose. I have nothing against the human form whatsoever - so just a scantily clad or naked body does not necessarily translate as degrading IMO.

To be honest, the idea of anyone being 'supermanned' conjures up some darn hilarious imagery...and no, it doesn't offend me as a woman. I know no one would dare even try it on me!

By saying no one would dare to try it on you - you are saying that you do not find it acceptable. But you think it would be funny if it happened to someone else. Really? So, you would still find it hilarious if someone did that to your best friend? Your sister? What if a man did that to your mother? I am betting you wouldn't think it funny then. So, why would it be funny for any woman to be treated this way?

As far what this thread is concerning, nope, no way in Hell "Ho" is an acceptable concept here. Like I said, we are a bit more liberal than a lot of parents we know in what our child watches or listens to, but we do have things we consider unacceptable, and will pull the parent card and say "No". It scares me a bit that there are parents who don't.

I think that is because for so many they think liberal = anything goes. That is SO not true in my household. I lean so far to the left that on the one political scale I am past Ghandi and the Dalai Lama. But that does not mean that I abdicate my responsibilities as a parent to make that my son is taught right from wrong. And for me, allowing women to be viewed in this light - whether implicitly or explicitly - is wrong.

 

[Kath2003]

By saying no one would dare to try it on you - you are saying that you do not find it acceptable. But you think it would be funny if it happened to someone else. Really? So, you would still find it hilarious if someone did that to your best friend? Your sister? What if a man did that to your mother? I am betting you wouldn't think it funny then. So, why would it be funny for any woman to be treated this way?

I wouldn't expect anyone to be treated that way, but it's just a song lyric. And to be honest, I'd expect any of those people to be strong enough to have high enough standards to not allow it in the first place, or to kick some butt if it did.