Yes, I lost it

[tampaguys]

Okay, I admit it...this thread made me go all carnival-ape crazy.

http://disboards.com/showthread.php?t=1324919

If I get banned from the boards for taking the webmaster to task for being a self-hating homophobe, it was lovely knowing you all.

 

[NewJersey]

What an excellent post!!!!

 

[tampaguys]

What an excellent post!!!!

Yer no slouch yerself.

 

[Saxton]

Every year at this time the Gay Days posts start to appear. They usually have one of two themes - they are worried about the crowds or they have a homophobic family member (I guess it's better than saying they don't want to be around us!). Then as the thread continues the nasty comments begin to grow. After posting on a few of them last year and feeling as though I was bashing my head into a wall I made a pledge to never post again ... although my fingers have hovered over the keyboard a few times! It's easy to go "ape crazy" when we're looked upon as a subhuman species or when comments are made questioning why a Gay Day is needed. I thought the posts from both of you were good - pointed but not nasty. All we can do is keep trying to educate people even though the message may never get through to many of them. On the plus side, those threads usually bring out the CSPs (Cool Straight People)!

 

[tampaguys]

On the plus side, those threads usually bring out the CSPs (Cool Straight People)!

I love Cool Straight People.

 

[DVC~OKW~96]

Actually, I thought you did an admirable job of explaining your position and not going carnival ape crazy! It is a very difficult thing to watch this year after year (the thinly veiled insults) and not go off the deep end.

I've managed to avoid most of those threads any more. I really don't have the patience, so I sincerely appreciate and respect someone like you who does. {{{hugs}}}.

Thank you.

 

[debbi801]

Can I appologize for all the intollerant straight people out there? Reading posts like that make me embarrassed to be heterosexual. How hard is it to explain to a child that sees to people holding hands or kissing that they hold hands or kiss because they like/love each other just like mommy and daddy hold hands / kiss because we love each other. It just isn't that difficult.

I'm truly sorry for all the intollerant and insensitive people out there. If my kids' schools got out before the end of June, we'd go during Gay Days without a second thought.

Debbi

 

[tampaguys]

Can I appologize for all the intollerant straight people out there? Reading posts like that make me embarrassed to be heterosexual. How hard is it to explain to a child that sees to people holding hands or kissing that they hold hands or kiss because they like/love each other just like mommy and daddy hold hands / kiss because we love each other. It just isn't that difficult.

I'm truly sorry for all the intollerant and insensitive people out there. If my kids' schools got out before the end of June, we'd go during Gay Days without a second thought.

Debbi

Simply put, you rock.

 

[Mama Twinkles]

You did a great job, tampaguys, and you have nothing to fear. Pete already knows legions of readers find his article homophobic. Maybe one day even he will celebrate his rightful claim to equality and pride. He did give us this board, after all.

Keep on speaking up to those who have not yet seen the light if you have the energy. Some of us don't have as much after years of seeing the same misguided threads, but we are very much with you.

 

[crashbb]

Tampaguys - you did a great job on the other thread. You managed to get your point across without bashing anyone (other than the author of the article) and continued to do so in response to other messages.

I agree with debbie801 - why is it any harder to explain two guys (or two girls) hugging/kissing than it is to explain a heterosexual couple doing the same thing? My parents managed during our yearly trips to Provincetown (sorry if that is an old stereotype, but when I was a kid it seemed that there were many guy couples there). I did completely embarrass my mother though, by loudly proclaiming that two guys kissing meant twice the cooties! In my defence, I was about six and still thought that boys had cooties.

Anyway, I hope that those of you who do go to Gay Days enjoy them to the hilt!

 

[tampaguys]

I did completely embarrass my mother though, by loudly proclaiming that two guys kissing meant twice the cooties! In my defence, I was about six and still thought that boys had cooties.

That's ridiculous. Everyone knows that girls are where cooties come from.

Thanks to all who posted supportive responses. After almost 20 years of activism, I haven't grown tired of these fights yet. If anything, the years have taught me that we have little hope of transforming the homophobic sectors of the straight community until we first address the problem of self-hating, homophobic gay people.

I am embarassed every time I see a gay person do what Mr. Werner did in this article...choosing embarassment and pandering over pride and integrity. He needs to wake up and smell the lavender.

 

[Tony-NJ]

I am embarassed every time I see a gay person do what Mr. Werner did in this article...choosing embarassment and pandering over pride and integrity. He needs to wake up and smell the lavender.

Anyway - great response Tampaguys!

 

[huizarst]

Don't sweat it tampaguys. I hope more people will show up and continue to build upon the tradition. It was amazing my first time to look out at the sea of red and know that we are one community.

Now that my partner and I are DVCers, we hope to go every year and support this event. It a great chance to bring new people with us, and make new friends when we are there.

I learned, like many, it can be a difficult process to come out and be who we are without guilt or shame. I find it very heartwarming to see lgbt families with children, spouses, and friends expressing who they are in the most magical place on earth. No apologies needed.

Steven

 

[Tiggernut_jadie]

Can I just agree that you handled the situation really well - I don't know that I could have been as polite!

WE've never visited in June - November is 'our' time - but we were stood next to a gay couple in the line for Peter Pan a couple of years ago. These guys were holding hands (as were my DH and I) and my DD (who was 4 at the time) spent ages staring at them. Eventually she asked the one guy "Is he your Handsome Prince?" (She's VERY into Princesses my DD! ) and the guys both laughed and said "Yep". My DD replied "How Lovely!" and then started talking about the Parade we'd just watched. I was SO proud of her - I've always taught her to accept people for who they are and those lessons have obviously paid off. We kept seeing these guys round and about all day, and they always said Hi to my DD.

Later that day we were watching Wishes and who should stand behind us but these guys. My DD was over the moon to see them again and stood with THEM to watch the fireworks instead of with DH and I. The one guy had one of those lightup Mickey toys and (after asking our permission) he gave this to my DD. She was thrilled and when she plays with this at home now, she always says the "Hamdsome Prince" gave it to her!

I tell this story to anyone who's 'scared' of Gay Days or whatever - di this experience scar my daughter for life, or is it one of her favourite memories about WDW.....I'll leave it to you to decide!!!!!

 

[tampaguys]

Can I just agree that you handled the situation really well - I don't know that I could have been as polite!

WE've never visited in June - November is 'our' time - but we were stood next to a gay couple in the line for Peter Pan a couple of years ago. These guys were holding hands (as were my DH and I) and my DD (who was 4 at the time) spent ages staring at them. Eventually she asked the one guy "Is he your Handsome Prince?" (She's VERY into Princesses my DD! ) and the guys both laughed and said "Yep". My DD replied "How Lovely!" and then started talking about the Parade we'd just watched. I was SO proud of her - I've always taught her to accept people for who they are and those lessons have obviously paid off. We kept seeing these guys round and about all day, and they always said Hi to my DD.

Later that day we were watching Wishes and who should stand behind us but these guys. My DD was over the moon to see them again and stood with THEM to watch the fireworks instead of with DH and I. The one guy had one of those lightup Mickey toys and (after asking our permission) he gave this to my DD. She was thrilled and when she plays with this at home now, she always says the "Hamdsome Prince" gave it to her!

I tell this story to anyone who's 'scared' of Gay Days or whatever - di this experience scar my daughter for life, or is it one of her favourite memories about WDW.....I'll leave it to you to decide!!!!!

Can I just say that I love you and your husband and your daughter? People like you make the fight worthwhile.

I, and particularly my partner, are pretty gregarious, and we are always striking up conversations with people while waiting in ride lines or sitting in restaurants, or offering to take pictures so that their whole family can be in the picture together. There have been a half dozen or so times that we have been spontaneously adopted by straight couples or families, and we LOVE it. Nothing gives me Disney magic (the feeling, not the boat) like ditching whatever plans we had and spending time with new, cool friends.

 

[Tiggernut_jadie]

You are very, very welcome tampaguys!

 

[meeskamouska]

I just skimmed over all of the posts in these two threads and just want to say that the way the arguement was handled by you , tampaguys, is a definite way to evoke change. By making clear and precise points, and avoiding threating or victim-like language you are able to draw a reader in and then they can absorb the message.
I have no idea how people can still be so closed up in their personal beliefs that they can't see jsut people!!! We teach our daughter that love is love and it makes no difference who that love is for!!!
We also teach her that everybody has a spirit and everyone has a body....sometimes our spirit matches our body and sometimes it doesn't. You can be a girl spirit in a girl body or a boy spirit in a girl body or vice versa. (Our explaination for transgendered individuals, kinda off topic but it is a great way to teach kiddos about difference in a way they can understand, so thought I would share).
I am so glad that these conversations are able to be had and that through amazing interactions we can witness growth!!! Or grow ourselves!

 

[tampaguys]

We teach our daughter that love is love and it makes no difference who that love is for!!!

Someone mentioned that discussions like these tend to bring out the gay-positive straight people, and boy were they right. Your daughter is so lucky to have parents who believe and teach that love is never wrong.

We also teach her that everybody has a spirit and everyone has a body....sometimes our spirit matches our body and sometimes it doesn't. You can be a girl spirit in a girl body or a boy spirit in a girl body or vice versa. (Our explaination for transgendered individuals, kinda off topic but it is a great way to teach kiddos about difference in a way they can understand, so thought I would share).

I love this explanation. I'm stealing it and using it.

 

[desertbloom]

Some of my favorite "girlfriends" are gay men! We can check out guys together, and they give me wonderful insight into the male psyche. I also have an aunt who is a lesbian. What makes me sad is that most gay couples don't feel free to have a PDA at all. Now I am not talking a groping, tongue slobbering PDA, as I feel that is inappropriate for both gay and straight couples. I just know it would really bother me to feel that I couldn't kiss my husband in public when we are sitting under the stars watching fireworks!

 

[tampaguys]

Some of my favorite "girlfriends" are gay men! We can check out guys together, and they give me wonderful insight into the male psyche. I also have an aunt who is a lesbian. What makes me sad is that most gay couples don't feel free to have a PDA at all. Now I am not talking a groping, tongue slobbering PDA, as I feel that is inappropriate for both gay and straight couples. I just know it would really bother me to feel that I couldn't kiss my husband in public when we are sitting under the stars watching fireworks!

I agree totally...if you're going to have a groping, tongue-slobbering PDA, take it where it belongs...in the back row at either Impressions de France or The American Adventure.

My partner and I had a very nice New Years midnight kiss at Epcot. The straight couple who adopted us during dinner at Bistro de Paris even gave us a little "awwwwwww".