Wrong number: How would you handle this?

[Corwin12]

So, about three weeks ago I get a phone call from a name and number I don't recognize. I didn't answer it. The same person tried to call me three more times that day. I figured it must be someone who really wants to talk to me, so I finally answered. It was an older gentleman looking for his nephew (who happens to have the same name I do.) I politely tell him he has the wrong number. He apologizes and I figure that is the end of it. The next day, he calls again. When I got home home from work, I check the phone and notice he tried to call four times. He never leaves a message. My wife calls the number back and an older woman answers. My wife tells her they keep calling the wrong number. She asks what number they are calling, corrects them, and then assumes ... Now, it is over with.

To summarize: three weeks later, the calls still keep coming. Some as early as 6:00 am, some as late as 11:00 pm. I've stopped answering and correcting them ... but I am getting very frustrated. If they didn't sound so nice I would have already screamed at them, but my patience is wearing thin. I've looked the number up, but there is only a name, no address. It is in the same town as me though. I am thinking of asking my brother (he's a cop) to track them down and pay a visit to them. I was going to go to Wal-mart and buy one of those phone with the HUGE numbers on it for him to deliver to them. Anyway, thanks for reading. Any advice?

 

[ducklite]

Is there a listing for the nephew? I'd try and get in touch with him and let him know that they are trying to reach him, and explain the situation. See if he'll handle it. Their confusion might be a symptom of Alzheimers or dementia, and it might be good to make the family aware.

It seems that is a kinder thing to do than to have a police officer go to their door.

Anne

 

[Demosthenes]

Can you put a call block on that number?

 

[Corwin12]

No, I cannot find any number for the nephew. I don't even know if he would have the same last name because it might be the women's nephew. They do not answer questions when I tried to ask, so I am limited to how much I can help them in that regard. BTW, part of me is wondering if this a joke ... but only a small part.

 

[NMAmy]

Is there a listing for the nephew? I'd try and get in touch with him and let him know that they are trying to reach him, and explain the situation. See if he'll handle it. Their confusion might be a symptom of Alzheimers or dementia, and it might be good to make the family aware.

It seems that is a kinder thing to do than to have a police officer go to their door.

Anne

I agree. I'm sure it would scare the heck out of them to have a cop come to the door. And giving them a phone with bigger numbers isn't going to help and seems a bit rude. They obviously have no problems DIALING, it's just getting the right number they're having an issue with.

 

[ducklite]

Maybe your brother might be able to find out who the nephew is and handle it quietly without going to their door?

Anne

 

[Regina]

I can sympathize. We have a number that's similar to a medical imaging center and a pool company. I dread the arrival of Spring since I know I'll be getting the pool calls. (It's amazing how early people call.)

I do find that older people tend to keep trying the same number when you tell them that they've misdialed.

If your brother can get their address for you, perhaps you can send them a note about the calls. That helped with the imaging center. (A lot of the calls were from within the medical center, and they'd hang up on me.) A strongly worded letter to the head of the Med center cut down on that dramatically.

Good luck.

 

[FayeW]

Well, I think you have no choice but to be firm with them the next time they call. Tell them: "Look, you have called XXX times in the last 3 weeks. I have told you twice you have the wrong number. Stop calling me!"

Asking the police (even if it is your brother) to pay a visit rather than you just picking up the phone seems extreme to me.

 

[Corwin12]

Well, I think you have no choice but to be firm with them the next time they call. Tell them: "Look, you have called XXX times in the last 3 weeks. I have told you twice you have the wrong number. Stop calling me!"

Asking the police (even if it is your brother) to pay a visit rather than you just picking up the phone seems extreme to me.

I've already done that. He apologizes profusely and then hangs up. I am thinking he has no short term memory because he acts surprised every time I did this. I am telling you, this is like Groundhog Day: I have the same conversation with him every time he calls. At what point do you have to be extreme? Having the phone ring at night like that is nerve wracking (I have aging parents myself and am dreading a call like that .... my wife already got the 11:30 pm call that her mom died.)

 

[marshallandcartersmo]

I feel sorry for you. This happened to my parents last year but it was a little girl that kept calling......often late at night, early in the morning. At first they thought it was a joke, but after the 10th call it got irritating. My parents called back several times but never got an answer when they called. They ended up calling 911 and gave them the phone number and had them call and see if there was anything wrong (this was after the little girl had called very late at night asking for her grandparents). She didn't call back after that......

If you can't have their number blocked (sounds like a good idea to me), I wouldn't hesitate to have your brother go and talk to them. For goodness sake I'm sure he's not going to go in there with guns blazin'!! If he could nicely tell them they have been calling the wrong number for several weeks, he might be able to get down to the bottom of the problem. Maybe it is dementia---or maybe it's someone playing a joke. But you won't know until someone goes to find out.

 

[chell]

Contact your phone company to see what they can do to assist you. The gentleman may have memory and/or hearing issues. Sending your brother out may not be a good option since it could possibly get him in trouble - I know around here it sure would. That just seems too extreme anyway, especially since the caller isn't trying to harass you or anything. Seems like the phone company should be able to do something to help you out.

 

[chell]

By the way is your name Bonnie?

 

[BirdsOfPreyDave]

Try *60. That's the code on my phone system (Cox cable) that allows me to set numbers for automatic rejection.

 

[kristen821]

Next time they call try asking for the last name like when the ask for John (or whatever the name is) ask John who and then say sorry you have the wrong number does your nephew possibly have a different area code? Where is he from? Then maybe you can find the nephew and call him and tell him to call his aunt and uncle.
I am thinking maybe this is the nephews old number they are calling or they need to put an area code in front of the number. I hope it works out for you.

 

[Mady/Sophiemom]

Something like that happened to us a few years ago before we moved. An older woman looking for her son. We would cry, and cry, about how she wished they could put the past behind them, and she wished he would call, or visit. Often it was on our voice mail, during the day when we were at work. Broke my heart.

We called the number from the caller ID. Turns out son had our number, but years ago. She lived with another son, and was at home during the day, and would get lonely. No one had contact w/ the son she was trying to reach. He would appoligize, and DH heard him scolding her about it, during one of the calls.

Anyway, calls slowed, but never stopped. It got to be a joke at our house. The caller ID was B. Cosby, so after awhile, we would just laugh that Bill Cosby was calling again. We stopped trying to call and correct them. I guess I had fears of the son taking the phone away or something. She never called late, or early though. That would get annoying.

 

[Corwin12]

Since I first posted this thread this morning, they have called 4 times. I have tried to talk to them and utilize some of the advice left here, but now they just hang up as soon as they hear my voice. So: rude or not, scary or not, they will be getting a visit from the man in blue to put an end to this.

 

[KikiFan]

I realize how annoying the repeated calls are, I constantly deal with the same thing. My number is one digit off from a local charity organization so I'm constantly getting calls of people asking for rent assistance.

But honestly, calling in the police without giving the phone company a chance to handle it is ridiculous and total overkill. Call the phone co, report them and have them handle it. They'll see how many times you've been called from that number and they'll block it for you. Personally, I'd question any police officer that would actually do that type of thing. imo it's totally inappropriate on his part.

 

[barkley]

call the phone company. we had an issue with a relative who made inappropriate calls to us and found that when we explained the situation to the phone company they were very compliant in putting in a call block for that persons number (multiple calls at inappropriate hours are considered harassing). when they called from their home phone they just got a message that said 'your call is unable to be connected'. from what i understand if they had called the phone company they would have been told the circumstances and legal implications, but in your case the phone company might explain YET AGAIN to them that they were dialing the wrong number.

we had an old phone number and i felt so bad. some elderly lady gave it out to everyone as her own. we got calls from doctors, pharmacies, friends-and she must have belonged to every social group in the state we ended up putting a new message on our machine that said it was'nt her number and just hoped someone who encountered her would point out to her she was mistelling people.

 

[dcgrumpy]

Call your phone co's Annoyance Call Bureau. I wouldn't send the police to an elderly couples home for something like this.



I've had an old lady calling me once a month for 7 years to make an appointment to get her hair done.

I can't imagine what her hair looks like by now.

 

[Corwin12]

I realize how annoying the repeated calls are, I constantly deal with the same thing. My number is one digit off from a local charity organization so I'm constantly getting calls of people asking for rent assistance.

But honestly, calling in the police without giving the phone company a chance to handle it is ridiculous and total overkill. Call the phone co, report them and have them handle it. They'll see how many times you've been called from that number and they'll block it for you. Personally, I'd question any police officer that would actually do that type of thing. imo it's totally inappropriate on his part.

#1, I have Vonage and have already spoken to them (per advice earlier in the thread) and there is no way they can block 1 number
#2, I think you think calling the police is overkill because I mentioned the people calling are elderly. If I said they sounded like young kids, I am sure you'd want the SWAT over there to handle it
#3, why would you question a police officer doing his job? Do you think he is going to go over there and break the door down, yelling and screaming at them? No, he is going to go over there and find out what the situation is in a very respecful manner. So ridiculous or not, it is what is going to happen. I tried everyone's advice here and none of it has worked.