Would you say something (neighbor friend related)

[roliepolieoliefan]

My neighbor has a Memorial Day party every year. We have been invited in the past but didn't get an invite this year. She had it. We seen and heard the people there and just confirmed it with another neighbor this morning.

I wouldn't call us best buds but we are friendly , say Hi , talk. We have kids the same age and are invited to alot of different different functions we are both at.

I like her and her husband and can't imagine why we weren't invited this year. Would you say something? Its really bothering me. Did I do something to tick her off or was it an oversight? I'm not sure but I would feel bad if she's mad at me for some reason I don't know about.

 

[golfgal]

Maybe she just assumed you knew to come. Maybe the invite got lost in the mail or blew off the door or whatever.

 

[luvmy3]

No, I wouldn't say anything to a neighbor about not being invited to their party.

 

[LilyWDW]

I wouldn't approach them to say something about this. If you are having a conversation about something, maybe slip in a "So, how was your Memorial Day party this year?". I mean, you really don't know what could have happened, so no use starting anything over it, kwim?

 

[It'sWDW4me]

My neighbor has a Memorial Day party every year. We have been invited in the past but didn't get an invite this year. She had it. We seen and heard the people there and just confirmed it with another neighbor this morning.

I wouldn't call us best buds but we are friendly , say Hi , talk. We have kids the same age and are invited to alot of different different functions we are both at.

I like her and her husband and can't imagine why we weren't invited this year. Would you say something? Its really bothering me. Did I do something to tick her off or was it an oversight? I'm not sure but I would feel bad if she's mad at me for some reason I don't know about.

Was the party scaled back as far as number of guests from years past? Maybe they had to shorten the list of invitees. You don't mention it in your post but do you have parties that they're invited to? Maybe they're feeling things are a little one-sided?

If you do like these people, maybe start building a stronger friendship this summer. Invite them over for a cookout - just their family and yours. Get the rapport really flowing so that, in years to come, you'll be the "couldn't possibly have a party without them" neighbors.

 

[LuvOrlando]

Ouch, that would definitely hurt my feelings but I wouldn't say anything about it to the neighbors, that's just me though. If it was a lost invite or something I'm sure they will bring it up and ask you why you never showed. If they say nothing I'd assume it was deliberate.

 

[Rora]

Personally, I wouldn't say anything but I would continue to be friendly with the neighbor, just to be nice.

Regardless, this situation stings. Don't take it too personally OP!

 

[lillygator]

how are invites normally handled?

 

[roliepolieoliefan]

how are invites normally handled?

Last couple years by email so I know it wasn't lost or anything.

 

[emma'smom]

I'd be a bit offended too. However, since it sounds like these are casual friends, I probably wouldn't address it directly and stir things up. I'd just continue to be pleasant to them. However, if I was chatting with them in passing I might say something like "Did you have a good Memorial Day?" just to see what response they give. However, I wouldn't push the issue if they didn't mention the picnic.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Are there other "signs" that she's angry about something or otherwise wanting to put the friendship on ice? Not calling? Kids not invited to play with their kids, etc? If so, then she might just be wanting some space. If not, then she might have just wanted to have family over or had to make choices due to space or finances, etc. If it's the former, then it's a difficult situation since you are neighbors. I don't know if I'd specifically ask about the party, but next time I see or talk to her I might try to see if something's bothering her. I really wish if people are upset about things they talk to eachother about it. Hang in.

 

[merekc]

Personally, I would have asked her prior to the party. If nothing has happened to make you think she would be mad at you, I would have asked what they had planned for the weekend (not specifically the party).

It is very easy when sending out email invites to accidentally leave someone off as you are checking people's emails. Also, did you change your email address during this past year?

At this point, I'd let it go. Don't dwell on it and cause issues where there probably aren't any. You are as much responsible for any miscommunication if you failed to address your concerns prior to the event. I'm not saying this to be harsh, but if there are no issues between you and you are typically invited and you are friends(neighborly) then I think you could have asked without being rude.

 

[DizBelle]

I would say it is weird if you were invited to the Memorial Day party in years past but not this year. Can you ask any of the other neighbors that were there if they got a clue while at the party?

 

[arminnie]

Have you ever invited her to something you are hosting? Party, dinner, lunch, coffee, etc.?

A friend of mine has given a big crawfish boil for years and years. This year she cut back and didn't invite anyone who only shows up for this event and never asks her to do anything.

It wasn't done out of anger - she is getting older and needed to cut back. It was just easiest to cut out those who never call her to do anything.

 

[Silent1CB]

I would not say anything. Many reason why you may not be invited. Maybe they had less funds for party this year & had to cut back on how many people to invite?