Would you say "hello"?

[Crankyshank]

I probably wouldn't say hello to a DISer but I would say hello to an old acquaintance if I ran into them. I know the acquaintace - I don't know the DISer

 

[Papa Deuce]

Another comparing status thread - shocking.

Imagine that. You getting on me. Now there is the shock of the century. Just like always.

Ya know what I find funny? People like you who I have never seen offer a kind word -- maybe you have, but I haven't seen it -- who like to jump on people like cheetahs. At least I am always trying to help people. I don't invade other people's posts JUST to give a hard time like you do.

Scare me away? Not likely. Just makes me more determined to be here.

I'll be here taking abuse or verbal jousting til the day they remove me from these boards. And at least I can go to sleep at night knowing that almost without exception, I have treated people with respect. I'm sure that I may have slipped once or twice.

But how many of you can say that you treat people with respect? And, even better, how many of you hide behind alternate screen names when you want to get nasty? So not only are you rude, but cowardly too.

Hey, for better or worse, I put the real me out there. No games. No illusions. But one thing is for certain.... I ain't going away unless I get banned.

 

[Papa Deuce]

]I think PD knows he was wrong in not saying hello.[/B] He posted here hoping to get absolution. Didn't work that way except for a few.

It seems that when the masses don't conform to what he believes he bails on the post and just waits for it to go away. I'm of the mindset that you should not ask for an opinion if you really don't want to hear what others think. I'm still wondering if his DD's got to be princesses for Halloween or not.

Just my 2 cents.

No, I don't really think that at all. I made my choice and am ok with it, though I had questioned myself. There is no "right" or "wrong" in this, just what I chose to do.

 

[Papa Deuce]

gee....maybe he was in the middle of a home remodeling project and ran out for more supplies, or something. How in the world can you tell that someone is down and out financially by one look?

Why are you confused? Walk down the street of any major city and see homeless people. Tell me that you can't tell that they look down and out. If you can't admit that you think that, then you are lying to yourself.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I probably wouldn't say hello to a DISer but I would say hello to an old acquaintance if I ran into them. I know the acquaintace - I don't know the DISer

But how will you get to know me if you don't say "hi"?

 

[Bob Slydell]

Why are you confused? Walk down the street of any major city and see homeless people. Tell me that you can't tell that they look down and out. If you can't admit that you think that, then you are lying to yourself.

So the guy was homeless now?

 

[cardaway]

Ya know what I find funny? People like you who I have never seen offer a kind word -- maybe you have, but I haven't seen it -- who like to jump on people like cheetahs. At least I am always trying to help people. I don't invade other people's posts JUST to give a hard time like you do.

We rarely cross paths because I avoid silly polls. When we do it's because we share some of the same interests.

And this thread is certainly helping people. Helping people see the real you one indirect stereotype at a time.

 

[MosMom]

Was this man panhandling on the street? You can typically tell a homeless person because they are holding a sign saying that they are!

Your friend looked like a bum but for all you know he is a millionaire.

 

[gr8tpanther]

20 years can do a lot to change a person's perspective on life, though. I imagine quite a few of us were/are concerned with style and outward appearance in our teens and early twenties. Life experience does a lot to change that, probably even more so for someone who has gone through difficult times. Yes, I would have said hello.

ITA!

 

[jipsy]

And at least I can go to sleep at night knowing that almost without exception, I have treated people with respect

Treat people with respect? You saw someone who was, at one time, a really good friend of yours and you couldn't bring yourself to say hello to him on the street?

I hardly see that as treating someone with respect.

 

[Papa Deuce]

Treat people with respect? You saw someone who was, at one time, a really good friend of yours and you couldn't bring yourself to say hello to him on the street?

I hardly see that as treating someone with respect.

No, not a really good friend. Read the first two lines before jumping in, will ya?

 

[Zurealsoon]

Why are you confused? Walk down the street of any major city and see homeless people. Tell me that you can't tell that they look down and out. If you can't admit that you think that, then you are lying to yourself.

First you say he looks 50 rather than the 44 you both are. Now he looked like a homeless bum on the street, and you are sure it was him?

 

[Papa Deuce]

First you say he looks 50 rather than the 44 you both are. Now he looked like a homeless bum on the street, and you are sure it was him?

whatever.

 

[Zurealsoon]

He had a car worth about 15,000 dollars in 1978. He had it all maxed out. A show car."?

In 1975 I know someone who bought an imported British sports car for $5k and that was big $$ back then. Do tell what car your friend had. please.

 

[JulyGirl]

I honestly don't know how you could make the judgment that this guy was near homeless. My Uncle owns his own car dealership and is quite successful. He loves working on cars and often does at his dealership's garage. I've seen him on those days. He can look pretty crazy. He wears his old, ratty hooded sweatshirt and grimey jeans. If you saw him on those days, you wouldn't know about his huge bank account. Can't judge a book by a cover. If it were me, I would have at least said "hello."

 

[arminnie]

Several of you have mentioned that it is not fair to judge someone on how they look on one day.

Maybe you've been fairly sheltered and haven't come across people first hand who have been ravaged by drugs and alcohol. It's not a look that you have on your worst day of illness or your worst day of yard work.

I nursed my mother through 3 years of terminal cancer and spent a lot of time in chemo rooms with other patients. As bad as some of them looked (and many unfortunately were terminal) - there was still a difference from the people I've seen who have abused their bodies.

There's dirt from working hard for a day and their is grime that is ground in over many days.

It's not just a matter of money. Remember those awful pictures from the SuperDome from Katrina? Many if not most of those people were very poor and certainly were down on their luck - but they did not look like they were in Papa's terms "cooked". And these people had no hygiene facilities for days.

I just got back from New Orleans and made several trips to Home Depot and other hardware stores. They were filled with people coming in for supplies who were doing some of the nastiest clean up work imaginable. Yes, some of them were filthy, but they did not look "ravaged". Big difference.

 

[Papa Deuce]

I honestly don't know how you could make the judgment that this guy was near homeless. My Uncle owns his own car dealership and is quite successful. He loves working on cars and often does at his dealership's garage. I've seen him on those days. He can look pretty crazy. He wears his old, ratty hooded sweatshirt and grimey jeans. If you saw him on those days, you wouldn't know about his huge bank account. Can't judge a book by a cover. If it were me, I would have at least said "hello."

See, this is the problem. I didn't say he was homeless at all. All I said was that he looked like he had been ravaged by something in his life, and " could " be down and out financially. Since alot of you want to get on me about whatver big money you think I have -- and I don't, I am middle class, though probably upper middle class as defined by dollars earned for my area --- I dress like a BUM all the time. I wear sweats. I've been known to even wear a torn shirt in public! GASP!!!! Dang, I haven't even shaved in 3 days and went out in public today.

So, I am NOT making a judgement as to his station in life, like a caste system. But when you see what "could "be the results of drugs ( and I know what that looks like very well... my younger cousin is now permanently in a mental institution from her drug abuse... and she was a BEAUTIFUL young lady, who could now pass for 60, well I have seen it up close ). Or maybe he had some very serious medical problem; I don't know.

All I have out out there are POSSIBLITIES of what I think "could" have happend. Never once did I claim to KNOW what may have happened. And if my "guess" was right, I think if I were in his shoes, "I" would have preferred to be left alone, so I then took a step further and did not say hello.

 

[Crankyshank]

Several of you have mentioned that it is not fair to judge someone on how they look on one day.

Maybe you've been fairly sheltered and haven't come across people first hand who have been ravaged by drugs and alcohol. It's not a look that you have on your worst day of illness or your worst day of yard work.

I nursed my mother through 3 years of terminal cancer and spent a lot of time in chemo rooms with other patients. As bad as some of them looked (and many unfortunately were terminal) - there was still a difference from the people I've seen who have abused their bodies.

There's dirt from working hard for a day and their is grime that is ground in over many days.

It's not just a matter of money. Remember those awful pictures from the SuperDome from Katrina? Many if not most of those people were very poor and certainly were down on their luck - but they did not look like they were in Papa's terms "cooked". And these people had no hygiene facilities for days.

I just got back from New Orleans and made several trips to Home Depot and other hardware stores. They were filled with people coming in for supplies who were doing some of the nastiest clean up work imaginable. Yes, some of them were filthy, but they did not look "ravaged". Big difference.

That's about a huge assumption about the posters here as Papa's 10second psychoanalysis of the guy he ran into.

I've volunteered at homeless shelters, domestic violence shelters, food banks, and have encountered many people ravaged by drug abuse, alcohol abuse, etc... you know what? My 54yr old cousin is heroin thin, looks 10yrs older than he is, and dresses like a homeless man. He looks like he's a heroin addict. Guess what? he's suffering from liver cancer.

Bottom line: Don't judge a book by its cover and don't run and hide from someone you knew once upon a time because they appear to have had a rough life. It's snobbish and I don't know about anyone else but I was raised better than that. a hello won't hurt anyone and might actually make that person's day.

 

[arminnie]

Bottom line: Don't judge a book by its cover and don't run and hide from someone you knew once upon a time because they appear to have had a rough life. It's snobbish and I don't know about anyone else but I was raised better than that. a hello won't hurt anyone and might actually make that person's day.

My bottom line: I put the other person's comfort level first. That's how I was raised. If I've known someone, and think that my actions would be be hurtful to them I don't do it.

Maybe not speaking would hurt them, but maybe it would. That's a judgement call. And the person who knew the person in the past is probably is the best person to make that call. Notice Papa D didn't say that they guy made any attempt to speak to him.

I would never not speak to someone who spoke to me. I speak to the homeless people on the street to try to brighten their day.

 

[Bob Slydell]

Since alot of you want to get on me about whatver big money you think I have -- and I don't, [/B]

I don't believe anyone's said they think you have big bucks, just that you talk about big bucks constantly.