Would you say "hello"?

[Tigger_Magic]

Why are you confused? Walk down the street of any major city and see homeless people. Tell me that you can't tell that they look down and out. If you can't admit that you think that, then you are lying to yourself.

My parents reared me to never judge a book by its cover. Like others have posted on here, you have no clue what that person's real situation is. Talk about rude behavior...

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I'm not positive what I would have done since it wasn't me making the decision, but I know what I'd like to think that I would have done, based on the kind of person I think I am. Hopefully I would have said "hi" to him. Afterall, how do I know why he looks the way he does. He could have had (or still have) cancer or some other life threatening disease or condition that can take a toll on the body. He could have had all kinds of personal things happen that could have resulted in what he is today.

What harm could have come out of saying hi, as long as it was done respectfully? IE, you wouldn't have wanted to say, "gee, looks like you've seen better days", etc. But a "Hi, are you Jim? Remember me?...". Or even just a simple "hi". Less is more sometimes, but "nothing" might have spoken volumes, as far as he was concerned.

I'll quote my own post! Don't think I've ever done that...

But I don't want to make my same case over again--I'm not a good enough typist for that.

Just was hoping for an answer to my question--what harm is likely to have come out of a simple "hi"?

 

[cardaway]

I don't believe anyone's said they think you have big bucks, just that you talk about big bucks constantly.

They are innocent polls and non-bragging threads. The obsession with money and material things is only our imagination.

 

[Tigger_Magic]

They are innocent polls and non-bragging threads. The obsession with money and material things is only our imagination.

Which must be very fertile!

 

[kidshop]

Just was hoping for an answer to my question--what harm is likely to have come out of a simple "hi"?

I think the 'harm' that was considered was making someone uncomfortable for you to see them in their current state. The split second assumption was that a person in that state would not want to be recognized...it would be embarrassing for them since their life was the way it was. You know, they wouldn't have a good answer to the obligatory "how are you and what have you been doing?" And then maybe you'd have to get into a whole 'thing' with TMI etc. But I hope I would have said 'hi' and smiled at least, and if I had to make a quick exit, I'd deal with that.

 

[Tigger&Belle]

And that's exactly my point--a lengthy conversation wouldn't have to take place, but a simple "hi" would have left the door open and then Papa could have either left it at that or chatted with the guy, depending on what vibes he was getting from the man.

 

[disney4us2002]

I think PD knows he was wrong in not saying hello. He posted here hoping to get absolution. Didn't work that way except for a few.

It seems that when the masses don't conform to what he believes he bails on the post and just waits for it to go away. I'm of the mindset that you should not ask for an opinion if you really don't want to hear what others think. I'm still wondering if his DD's got to be princesses for Halloween or not.

Just my 2 cents.

Sorry, I disagree. It was not wrong to not say hello. The world is full of gray areas, not many absolutes. It's nuts to say there was a clear right or wrong in this situation. As for absolution, I'm pretty sure PD is not Catholic, lol.

 

[Crankyshank]

How on earth is saying hello hurtful? And how do we know the guy even avoided Papa Deuce? He might have not recognized him, or even *gasp* been preoccupied and not noticed him at all.

 

[coach4448]

I think PD knows he was wrong in not saying hello. He posted here hoping to get absolution. Didn't work that way except for a few.

It seems that when the masses don't conform to what he believes he bails on the post and just waits for it to go away. I'm of the mindset that you should not ask for an opinion if you really don't want to hear what others think. I'm still wondering if his DD's got to be princesses for Halloween or not.

Just my 2 cents.

ITA
Seen it happen before, and I'm sure that we will see it again.

 

[drayke]

I saw a guy this morning that I haven't seen in 20+ years. We were friends, but not close friends for about 3 years. Now when I knew this guy, he was all about "style". Everything was designer this, or designer that. He had a car worth about 15,000 dollars in 1978. He had it all maxed out. A show car. Like I said, all about style. And voted "Best Looking" guy in our high school AND our tech school.

So, I saw him today and it looked like he had been to hell and back - twice. I mean he was cooked. But for sure it was him.

I was going to say hello, but then it occured to me that maybe I shouldn't because he may get embarrassed. He was dirty and disheveled. And he would be 44 years old, but helooked well over 50.

I did want to say hello, but I think he may have been terribly uncomfortable for him, and to an extent, me.

So, would you have said, "hello"?

Sounds more like your sense of his possible embarrassment is transference of your own. Only you can answer your own question, however, you might want to look at your sig line and frame the question from there.

 

[RitaZ.]

For all we know, this scenario was made up and didn't happen at all. The only fact that we know is that PD says it happened.

 

[coach4448]

Sounds more like your sense of his possible embarrassment is transference of your own. Only you can answer your own question, however, you might want to look at your sig line and frame the question from there.

 

[Tigger_Magic]

Sorry, I disagree. It was not wrong to not say hello. The world is full of gray areas, not many absolutes. It's nuts to say there was a clear right or wrong in this situation. As for absolution, I'm pretty sure PD is not Catholic, lol.

You are correct... greeting or not greeting someone you meet is not a moral absolute. It is courteous to greet someone you know and to return the greeting of someone you do not.

However, when one begins making assumptions about someone's current status when you know/knew them based solely on a few seconds of observation... and then to decide to avoid them... JMO, that's rude. Not morally wrong, but definitely not nice.

 

[DVCLiz]

I saw a guy this morning that I haven't seen in 20+ years. We were friends, but not close friends for about 3 years. Now when I knew this guy, he was all about "style". Everything was designer this, or designer that. He had a car worth about 15,000 dollars in 1978. He had it all maxed out. A show car. Like I said, all about style. And voted "Best Looking" guy in our high school AND our tech school.

So, I saw him today and it looked like he had been to hell and back - twice. I mean he was cooked. But for sure it was him.

I was going to say hello, but then it occured to me that maybe I shouldn't because he may get embarrassed. He was dirty and disheveled. And he would be 44 years old, but helooked well over 50.

I did want to say hello, but I think he may have been terribly uncomfortable for him, and to an extent, me.

So, would you have said, "hello"?

I don't know, ya'll - someone I knew as a friend but not a close friend twenty years ago, exhibiting a radical and complete change in appearance, actually dirty, according to the OP - it just doesn't strike me as a safe thing to engage this person. If I had had no contact with this person, as the OP clearly hasn't (or else he would presumably know what circumstances led to these changes), I really think I would have had the same reaction, at a minimum. Our three year friendship twenty years ago wouldn't have been enough to make me feel comfortable with this person today.

I know it is possible that this person was really a millionaire cancer survivor, but honestly, it's much more likely from this description that he wasn't, don't you think??? I know everyone's having a little fun ripping this one to shreds, but pick a person you knew in these same circumstances twenty years ago, and ask yourself if you'd really be willing to speak. AND to continue the contact, once you'd initiated it, if the person wanted to do more than just make eye contact and exchange a brief smile.

 

[Papa Deuce]

Sorry, I disagree. It was not wrong to not say hello. The world is full of gray areas, not many absolutes. It's nuts to say there was a clear right or wrong in this situation. As for absolution, I'm pretty sure PD is not Catholic, lol.

recovering...

 

[Papa Deuce]

For all we know, this scenario was made up and didn't happen at all. The only fact that we know is that PD says it happened.

Gee, wouldn't that be true of EVERY SINGLE POST on the DIS?

 

[RitaZ.]

Yes, that can also be said of any post. But, certain posters have credibility, others do not. PD, IMO, you have no credibility.

 

[Cindy's Mom]

Yes, that can also be said of any post. But, certain posters have credibility, others do not. PD, IMO, you have no credibility.

wow, that's harsh

ETA, IMO

 

[Dare2Wish]

How could saying "hello" be uncomfortable. Chances are the guy might not even remember you to begin with. I always greet "old friends". Even if I don't like what they're wearing.

 

[Tigger_Magic]

wow, that's harsh

RitaZ did say it was "in my opinion." After a while you can see trends in what people post. I think that's all that some are addressing in this thread.