Would you let your average/above average child repeat Kindergarten?

[JoyG]

My kids go to inner city public schools. I teach in the same inner city system (at a different school). I can't move to the 'burbs because as a condition of my employment I have to live in the city.

I have picked the "best" inner city school for them to attend that doesn't require an entrance test. We tried for the gifted and talented school but they didn't test into it. I know my kids aren't gifted, but I consider them average and on target for grade level.

Apparently, their current teachers agree. They are both in Kindergarten this year. One is at the top of his class. The other is in the middle of his class. Neither is "failing" or doing unsatisfactory in any area.

We just had them tested for a private, prestigious Christian school in the suburbs.

The school called me (on vacation) to let me know that they will only accept my children if they repeat kindergarten! I am soooo bummed. And I have to confess a knee jerk reaction of, "I can't believe you're telling me (a teacher myself!) my two average/to above average children are not smart enough to go into your 1st grade." (I didn't say that but I was thinking it!)

I know we're comparing inner city schools to suburban private schools...but to have an entire year discrepancy in KINDERGARTEN is shocking.

If my kids are going to repeat, kindergarten is the year to do it. They won't be stigmatized...they probably won't even remember it that well. This Christian school is really top calibur and I do want them to go there.

Should I just get over myself, stop being offended and put them in Kindergarten again?

Can anyone see any negatives to having them repeat K that I'm not thinking of?

ETA: The things the school wanted my kids to be able to do now aren't even in their current Kindergarten curriculum for this year...like read long vowels, vowel blends like "ea" and words with consonent blends "scr". My kids are reading sight words and short vowel words with one consonent.

thanks
Joy

 

[goodeats]

In that situation, yes.

Wait, so if they don't repeat kindergarten, they will never be able to go to this Catholic school?

 

[JoyG]

Right, if they don't repeat they can't get in. If they go to any other school though, they'd be going right into first grade.

 

[MinnieM3]

If this is the school you really want, then bite the bullet and have them repeat. In the long run, I think you'll be glad you did. My DS6 is currently repeating kindergarten (I'm a teacher, too) and he was well above average, just lacked some of the social skills and fine motor skills (he's a young bday). His class knows long vowels and lots of blends, 2 and 3 letter. Hope this helps!

 

[Toby'sFriend]

I don't know about this particular school - but there are many many Private schools that want their Kindergartners to be 6 and 7 years old because the work they do in Kindergarten is more like 1st and 2nd grade work in other schools.

My BIL is a headmaster at a Private College Prep school. They recommend to their families that the kids do a regular year of Kindergarten at a Public school or someplace like a private Montessori school - and then they enter Kindergarten in that building. Also, if the school is that good, they probably do not have many openings in First Grade because most of the slots will be taken by returning students and that could very well be a factor.

Yes, if I liked the school, I would have them repeat Kindergarten.

 

[mtemm]

yes, because it doesn't even seem like they would be repeating...sounds like they would be doing different stuff with different expectations. so even though it is called kindergarten, maybe think of it in different terms?

curious as to the ages of the other children starting at this school...are some of them a bit older, like yours, or would your children be the eldest in the class?

 

[AprilShowers]

I would check with the Christian school to see if they would allow me to get them extra summer help to learn the stuff they don't know.
If you got tuturing, or some summer school, would they let them into first grade?

If that's not an option, I would probably let them repeat Kindergarten, but I would think they COULD have some behavioral issues out of sheer boredom.

 

[ahutton]

The things the school wanted my kids to be able to do now aren't even in their current Kindergarten curriculum for this year...like read long vowels, vowel blends like "ea" and words with consonent blends "scr". My kids are reading sight words and short vowel words with one consonent.

thanks
Joy

I'm wondering what benefit there would be to them repeating K if the things the school they are trying to get into expects them to know? Or is it they will admit them into the school for the upcoming term, but in K instead of 1st?

Since it is a change of schools I would not feel bad about placing them into whatever grade was recommended, as long as the curriculum is going to start at or near where they left off and move them forward from there. I would guess if they changed schools again in the future you could have them test into the appropriate grade level at the new school, meaning they may skip later, right?

 

[JoyG]

I'm wondering what benefit there would be to them repeating K if the things the school they are trying to get into expects them to know? Or is it they will admit them into the school for the upcoming term, but in K instead of 1st?

Since it is a change of schools I would not feel bad about placing them into whatever grade was recommended, as long as the curriculum is going to start at or near where they left off and move them forward from there. I would guess if they changed schools again in the future you could have them test into the appropriate grade level at the new school, meaning they may skip later, right?

That's the thing, if this school doesn't work out for whatever reason, I don't think they would be able to "skip" a grade later. In 10 years of teaching in my district, I've never seen anyone skip a grade. If I kept them behind in K, they would be forever that year behind other kids their age.

 

[JoyG]

If this is the school you really want, then bite the bullet and have them repeat. In the long run, I think you'll be glad you did. My DS6 is currently repeating kindergarten (I'm a teacher, too) and he was well above average, just lacked some of the social skills and fine motor skills (he's a young bday). His class knows long vowels and lots of blends, 2 and 3 letter. Hope this helps!

Really? Long vowels and blends? What kind of school does your son go to? Private? Suburban? City?

That's not in our curriculum. I've looked! That's a shame, b/c if other school districts are doing it, we should be too!

 

[bengalbelle]

If this is the school you really want, then bite the bullet and have them repeat. In the long run, I think you'll be glad you did. My DS6 is currently repeating kindergarten (I'm a teacher, too) and he was well above average, just lacked some of the social skills and fine motor skills (he's a young bday). His class knows long vowels and lots of blends, 2 and 3 letter. Hope this helps!

I agree. I don't mean to turn this into a public vs. private debate, but generally the private schools in our area are ahead of the same grade level in public school. It's possible they'll be doing more advanced work than they would in the public grade 1.

I also think it's better to hold back in Pre-K or K rather than the higher grades. Lots of parents in our area decide to start their children late or hold back, particularly if they're close to the cut off for birthdays. If this is a nationwide trend, I don't think your boys would be out of the ordinary.

 

[budbeerlady]

I don't know about this particular school - but there are many many Private schools that want their Kindergartners to be 6 and 7 years old because the work they do in Kindergarten is more like 1st and 2nd grade work in other schools.

My BIL is a headmaster at a Private College Prep school. They recommend to their families that the kids do a regular year of Kindergarten at a Public school or someplace like a private Montessori school - and then they enter Kindergarten in that building. Also, if the school is that good, they probably do not have many openings in First Grade because most of the slots will be taken by returning students and that could very well be a factor.

Yes, if I liked the school, I would have them repeat Kindergarten.

I would not see a problem with them repeating. I started DD in kindergarten when she was still 4, she has an Oct birthday. She was very ready but some issues did arise when most of the children in the class are 6 or almost 6. That is a huge age difference. She is doing alright but we really did have to work on it.

She is doing things that my friends kids are no where near doing this year. Counting by 2's to 100. Reading and writing words like Mother, Father, all the colors, etc. When she isnt challenged she loves to talk and be a kid, so I dont think this was "bad" for her to have to work at. But I was surprised by what is expected of her.

Have you been able to review what is required of your kids at the end of K? Also some of that request might be due to bible memory work, bible stories, etc that the kids need to be familiar with. DD is spitting out Matthew 28 1-15 for Easter. Good thing she is an easy memorizer, that is a huge chunk for a K student. (My parents about fell over when she spouted it out one day when playing there.)

Good luck with your decision. If you feel it is best for them socially and on an education level then go for it.

 

[bengalbelle]

Really? Long vowels and blends? What kind of school does your son go to? Private? Suburban? City?

That's not in our curriculum. I've looked! That's a shame, b/c if other school districts are doing it, we should be too!

DS is transferring to a semi-public school next fall and if they're not reading by mid year of K they'll be placed in Reading Recovery. The lowest grade I taught was 3rd, but I really had no idea K's were expected to read by mid-year.

 

[tar heel]

The independent school my two older children attended had pretty tight standards for K admission. They were looking for kids to be at least 5 years and nine months developmentally. Since K always had a waiting list, they didn't need to bend. One of my son's friends was moved from public K in the middle of the year, and he was placed in junior K.

This is a tough call, and I don't know what I would do if I were you.

 

[budbeerlady]

Really? Long vowels and blends? What kind of school does your son go to? Private? Suburban? City?

That's not in our curriculum. I've looked! That's a shame, b/c if other school districts are doing it, we should be too!

Wow, now I know DD's school is advanced! I was just comparing it to local public schools in the area. The local public school told my cousin her son had to repeat Pre-k. He couldnt write his name, only wrote a couple of letters, etc. She was upset, but the poor kid wouldnt have stood a chance in DD's school.

Walking in the door she knew (and wrote) all letters uppper and lower case, letter sounds , numbers 1-15, simple math skills in addition and subtraction numbers 1-10, what vowels are, etc. And she really had to work on her words. She is trying to hard to sound out the words and she misses the actual sound of the word together. (If that makes sense) So its f-a-th-er but she doesnt quiet get it turned into the word father after she sounds it out. She gets stuck on some c words if we read curious george or something like that. But she is doing stuff I swear we didnt do untill 2nd grade.

 

[auntpolly]

If you like the school then you should trust it. At this age it will be no big deal and I just don't see how it can hurt. They must have some reason for suggesting it.

When DD (a bright little girl, she's done so well in school and getting ready to graduate college summa cum laud from a challenging school, and it seems like a lifetime ago that they told her she couldn't take advanced math in middle school. There were so many parents that got the same verdict and argued with the school, the school caved, and the kids got into the program without the test scores. I told DD, if you aren't ready for advanced math, then that's just not where you should be. Let's trust that the school knows what it's doing. Beyond a few kids bragging they were in a higher math level that their moms had gone crying to the school (I know this for a fact because the moms told me so), it was really the best thing.

She ended up scoring even higher in math than verbal on her SATs!!! We were so proud!!!

The goal is for them to learn. Keep your eye on the prize, and don't let this stuff get to you!!!

 

[Disney Doll]

I guess it depends on how badly you want them to go to the Christian school.

It seems like a condition of their entrance to the Christian school is to repeat Kindergarten. Soooo...I guess if yo really want them to go there, they would have to repeat Kindergarten.

 

[chris1gill]

Well, I think I would in this case... if it will give them a stronger foundation for first grade, I think that you should allow them to repeat kindergarten.

I say this, in part, because our kids go to a top notch private school, and there are four kids out of a total second grade population of 32 that are currently being tutored (our DD is in second grade)... One of the students transferred in this year and as a result of the need to tutor her, I guess the family has decided not to send her back next year... I think if she'd been better prepared, perhaps she would have been successful, I can't say for certain. But, certainly in your case, you really want to your children to be successful, and I bet the school you are looking at wants the same (I would hope)

 

[mickeyfan2]

If you want them to go to that school then yes have them repeat. If you don't want them to repeat, then you will either have to find a different school or keep them in the public school.

 

[ticktock]

I had thought of keeping my son from starting school when he did. He is a borderline birthday and it would have been no big deal at the time. My SIL had issues with her son and kept him back a year which helped (sending him to a private school helped more). This is what gave me the idea. But everyone else I talked to said, oh no! just send him, if it doesn't work out he can repeat.

I let him start that year, and every day of school I wish I hadn't. He is in a gifted school and he has no academic or social problems, but he is sooo unorganized and unmotivated. At the end of the K year I talked to the teacher and the principle, they were shocked that I would consider keeping him back, he tested in the top 1% in the K class, he's a very sweet boy, never a problem,why would I want to keep him back?

He is now in his first year of middle school. It is a struggle everyday to get him to get it together. He had a 89 in history last semester, I thought fine a B, I won't be one of those obsessive moms. A B is fine. I talk to his teacher, she says, your ds should be getting an A in my class, I'm very dissappointed in his grade, he should excell in this class, he has the brain, just not the will.

I have to say that every year he gets a little better, a little more self disiplined, a little more organized. It always seems to me that his maturity level is where it should have been the year before, to deal with the challenges of the school. Of course this is a gifted school, but it sounds like the private school your intrested in has a higher curriculum as well. I would be GRATEFUL for the chance to let my son mature more fully before being asked to perform at such a high level. It is not always an intelligence issue or a behaviour issue. Sometime's kids just don't have the drive it takes to excell. Wiegh all the factors, don't let your pride (or other people's ) get in the way. Good luck with your choice.