Would like advice on what to do please.

[The Mystery Machine]

He is very immatue. He is not even legally recognized here as my son's father because he never legitimized him after the paternity test proved he was the father. We were never married. There is no court ordered visits or anything. I only let my DS go because he said he wanted to start a relationship with his dad at that time.

Last actual contact before this mess started was July 08.

Does he give you regular child support for your son?

 

[Serena]

He sounds like a nut with an ulterior motive somewhere to me.

Again, but it bears repeating, document everything. Time, dates, what was said, how it was said, what was said in response, the mood, how it affects your children. How you called other people to get the truth, etc etc. It wouldn't hurt to mention what everyone was doing before and afterwards as well.

I don't believe he will sue for custody, he is wanting to scare you. But I am curious to why he is harassing you all of a sudden.

 

[Inigo]

He is very immatue. He is not even legally recognized here as my son's father because he never legitimized him after the paternity test proved he was the father. We were never married. There is no court ordered visits or anything. I only let my DS go because he said he wanted to start a relationship with his dad at that time.

Last actual contact before this mess started was July 08.

Have you ever gone to Court in this matter? Was he Court ordered to pay child support? If so, then he is legally recognized as the father.

If there is no Court ordered visitation plan or custody plan in effect, you do not have to allow him any visitation with your son. That's true even if he was ordered to pay support.

If he does go after custody, don't worry. There is no Court in the US that is going to take custody away from you since you have been the sole caregiver for most of this child's life. He may get Court ordered visitation, but you should request that it be on a supervised basis, and that it only be allowed to progress to unsupervised if the father uses that supervised visitation on a regular basis.

You can go to http://forum.freeadvice.com, and ask questions about this matter there. There are child custody and child support forums there with very knowledgeable posters. Make sure to give the name of your state in your initial post.

Oh, and dad's new wife/bed buddy has no say in this matter. She is a legal stranger to the child, so refuse to even talk to her about your son. If this goes to Court, ask the judge to order that all conversations about your son be between you and the father, not her.