Worried

[chrisf1961]

Well its only one more day tomorrow before we head down south and we have been talking with our little boy Ben (hes 5) about his trip, being Autistic even the slightest not normal things throws him and the latest is that he doesnt want to go to Folkestone! As you can probably guess thats where we are staying in the Premier Inn ( he calls it the Mr Moon shop) with their logo and we are just dreading trying to get him into the hotel as this can result in a meltdown. We are staying at the Cheyenne mainly becasue there are 4 of us going, but also because Ben loves riding the buses!
Yes we are only a day or so away from our hols but we are already stressed out before we go,think next year we will just stay at home and do the normal boring things he does in his routine and not upset him !

Keep saying chill Chris chill take a chill pill lol

 

[claireybella]

oh bless him and bless you for worrying - im not going to lie or pretend but i am not an expert when it comes to autistic children - just try and relax - what time you getting to hotel? do u think if u left a bit later he will be so tired from the trip down it wouldnt be so out of routine?

 

[chrisf1961]

oh bless him and bless you for worrying - im not going to lie or pretend but i am not an expert when it comes to autistic children - just try and relax - what time you getting to hotel? do u think if u left a bit later he will be so tired from the trip down it wouldnt be so out of routine?[/QUOTE

Hi and thanks for replying, its about 6-1.2 hours from here ,have to go to pick my eldest daughter up in St annes first, then off down south,yes we have left it as late as possible,most likely we will get to Folkestone around 5-6pm so its ok that way as he goes to bed about 7.30- 8pm ,its just that we havent been to the hotel for a number of months and that even though he will remember it it could throw him into a meltdown at reception! God help them if it happens ...poor lad just getting him out of the car can be a trial for him ......

 

[claireybella]

if you went on the website and showed him could that help ?? x

 

[chrisf1961]

Hi yes we normally do that, its kinda like preparing him for what and where we are going.Ive just put a picture of the Cheyenne up on the desktop so he can see it. Ben gets upset with anything new l even though hes done these things before its not happened recently.We are going on the Tunnel and he will get worked up as we go on but once hes on hes fine...its such a complex condition ...i still cant get my head around it .......what is normal and exciting for a normal child to go to a place like Disney and travel there...to Ben its a frightening unexpected journey( even though he knows we are going ) ....

 

[megarasweet]

My younger brother is autistic, and while I know that every case is different, I thought I could offer some small comfort.

Ever since he was a toddler he's struggled with the unfamiliar, and new places can send him into a meltdown, however with family holidays he's always surprised us. We'd just make sure he was surrounded with familiar things; his favourite toys, blankets, books, and plenty of paper and pencils (he loves drawing). When we first took him to Disneyland, age eight, we took it at his pace, and let him take as long as he needed to settle into the hotel room and get used to different areas of the park. The first day was hard on him, but by the second day he was more familiar with his surroundings, and managed to relax.

Incorporate the normal things that are part of his routine into the journey to make everything feel more familiar. If you're worried about checking into the hotel, then perhaps one of you wait outside with him playing a game (or watching buses if he loves riding them!) while the other checks in. Then when you go into the hotel you can get him straight up to your hotel room

Good luck and have a wonderful time!

 

[scampbunny]

totally agree with the above, always find that surrounding with familiar helps, and of course staying at the car until u can go straight to room is good....

we have only ever been to 2 places on holiday, but had multiple holidays lol i do just find it easier to go to familiar places but always use the distraction technique on him!!

it is so hard tho, and he is still young and one day will surprise u - might even be tomorro!! i know mine surprises us all the time, and we have learnt never try and predict his response, *** hell always do the opposite!

and obviously, try and not worry - *** he will totally pick up on ur stress and worry, and that will upset him more!!

have an amazing time xxx

 

[Ware Bears]

Hope all goes well, Chris, and that you all have a fantastic time.

 

[chrisf1961]

Thankyou everyone,sorry not replied to you before now ,lifes a bit hetic and stressful this end. Bens being saying all morning dont want Disney ! dont wanna go ! ...... im just hopeful that when we go through it with him later and telling him we are going for Sarah he will be fine....

Hi Scamp! not seen your name for a while ...yes i totally agree he does pick up on me ( especially me being stressed) i have a lot to learn on that score as i find his condition harder to handle than Sam does ( its the age!! ) lol

Thankyou Sweet for your post as well...sometimes i think its just us who have a autistic child ....just seems seems that way as being locked into Bens world is so damned hard at times i find it hard to break free into the normal world ....

Again many thanks everyone for your comments

Chris

 

[cherrymarzipan]

Hi Chris

I’m probably too late with this as we only got back late last night so have only just seen your post but for what it is worth we have a son with severe learning difficulties and definite autistic tendencies and have found showing YouTube clips of new attractions, shows etc. beforehand helps familiarise him. Like you we find that that once our son has been persuaded to try something he will love it – probably obsessively in our case! This trip’s obsessions were the Tarzan show, BTM and Star Tours.

As usual we had the meltdown on the journey home – life would be so much easier if we could live at Disneyland!

Hope all goes well for you.

 

[JohnnySharp2]

It's a small world, St Annes is only a few miles up the road from us.

I totally relate to what you are going through, our son is autistic and non verbal.
We somehow have managed to take him to Florida 8 times now and actually trying DLRP for the first time next month, partly because the travelling to the US is getting harder for us now with him.

To be honest despite his autism we have had many great times on holiday with him, like you say familiarity is a big thing, even staying at a different villa development can cause issues.

Our main worry in staying at Hotel New York as we haven't stayed in a hotel with him since he was 2, he is now 14.

The only thing I would say, and I know you understand your child better than anyone, but I would never avoid trying anything, our Joshua has had many meltdowns in the past at malls, theme parks etc - you need the holiday as much as the child does, and more importantly once you break through that barrier you will probably find your boy copes very well with it.