Women: Do you want male coworkers commenting on your appearance?

[JunieJay]

Not too long ago an adult in our congregation made that comment to my husband about our teenage son. It was a compliment, but I was clueless about what it mean.

I'm still a bit confused about it, to be honest. He was looking pretty happy about it all, so I assumed it was a compliment, but I had never before or since heard that expression!

 

[TxDsnyGrl74]

Not too long ago an adult in our congregation made that comment to my husband about our teenage son. It was a compliment, but I was clueless about what it mean.

So did you ever figure out what they meant by the comment? Odd to me that an adult would make a comment about a teenage boy? Hopefully it was an innocent comment.

 

[sweetandsassyfl]

Junie, I found an etymology discussion website that defines it but it has a bad word on it in another place so I'm not going to link it....but these are a couple of the things I found:
"after a long, hot and humid day in the South, there's nothing like a tall cold glass of water. I think that's the long and the short of it: when a woman is so outstandingly good-looking that she evokes that same feeling. It's a matter of contrast: hot day, thirst, then a tall glass of water. Normal looking people, working with sweaty men all day, then you see a beautiful woman."

"I've heard it in reference to men and women: someone tall, slender, and attractive in a cool, laid-back way"

 

[Tigger&Belle]

So did you ever figure out what they meant by the comment? Odd to me that an adult would make a comment about a teenage boy? Hopefully it was an innocent comment.

No I didn't, but I should do some research and figure it out. I'm sure it was an innocent comment...my son had said something memorable/funny in front of the whole congregation as a part of the service and this person said it in response to that, however it was still odd.

 

[Disney Doll]

I have no problem with a compliment.

Like every stupidly over the top PC thing, sexual harrassment complaints have gotten way out of hand. A person of the opposite sex saying "That's a nice dress" or "Gee, I like your tie" is not sexual harassment. They are compliments.

Most normal people know the difference between sexual harrassment and a compliment. It is not sexual harrassment for a person of the opposite sex to notice a change in your appearance. Cutting 10 inches off your hair (which is what I recall the other post's OP said she did) would be a noticeable change and I would expect some comment on it from both my male and female colleagues.

 

[JunieJay]

Junie, I found an etymology discussion website that defines it but it has a bad word on it in another place so I'm not going to link it....but these are a couple of the things I found:
"after a long, hot and humid day in the South, there's nothing like a tall cold glass of water. I think that's the long and the short of it: when a woman is so outstandingly good-looking that she evokes that same feeling. It's a matter of contrast: hot day, thirst, then a tall glass of water. Normal looking people, working with sweaty men all day, then you see a beautiful woman."

"I've heard it in reference to men and women: someone tall, slender, and attractive in a cool, laid-back way"

Well it sure as heck isn't that I am so outstandingly good looking, trust me.

I took it to mean I'm tall and slenderish (although it was a few years ago and I've put on a few pounds since then). He asked me several times how tall I was. I was so embarrassed I honestly felt like I was going to cry. I dunno, maybe it stems back to the days of being the gawky girl who was taller than all the boys. I do think he meant it as a compliment but it didn't go over too well. It wasn't just me who was uncomfortable, all the people in the room (with the exception of the guy who said it) looked uncomfortable.

 

[hlane]

I don't mind comments such as "your hair looks nice" or "I think that color looks good on you" or something but I have a male co-worker that takes it too far. Luckily I only work the weekends so I just ignore it (and the fact that he's in his late 60s ) But he's always saying he's gonna steal me from my husband, making "mmmmmmmmmm" noises when I walk by, saying all kinds of things along those lines. I find it really creepy and it grosses me out. It's not just me though, he's says that stuff to every female that works there.

 

[KariC]

??Ummm, ya DON't wanna look hot?

(So WHY did you buy the Jeans??)

GP---you're rotten! Hey, maybe you're one of those guys I worked with that I had to get after....

I guess I had to get the hot jeans to take away from the not-so-hot steel toed boots that I had to wear!

It was interesting....I traveled to Mexico very frequently for work, and it was expected to receive comments there. When women didn't, they were upset. Imagine their surprise when they discovered i understood (and did not appreciate) what the men on the mill floor were saying!

 

[Shugardrawers]

Personally, I don't mind things like a mention of a haircut. One of my last jobs, I wore scrubs daily and I rarely wear makeup. One day I changed into a dress, did my hair and makeup for a special occasion shortly before getting off work. One of the men commented that I looked very nice. To me that's great. It was a radical change from the every day and it was general enough not to be taken in a sexual harassment kind of way. I appreciated the compliment and thanked him. I can see where it might be hard to know the difference though. Once, I lost about 30# and was so proud of myself but was very disappointed no one at work said anything. My boss said he wasn't sure if it was ok to do so when I brought the subject up. I can see why he'd be afraid I'd think that was inappropriate to comment on my body. I'd actually rather a male coworker said nothing for fear of offending me than assume he can make any comment he wants regarding my appearance.

 

[RunDanceSkate]

I don't want anyone commenting if I dye my hair. I'm doing it to cover up the grey and I want it to look as natural as possible. Unless I go bright pink, then they can comment.

However I like to hear "nice dress", "your hair looks great", "new outfit?" from anyone.

 

[KariC]

I also think it can be a generational thing. The man who called me a "long cool drink of water" was older, perhaps in his generation that was acceptable. I was mortified and made to feel humiliated, but I don't think he really meant for me to feel that way. KWIM? For that reason, I let it go during the meeting and kinda laughed it off, even though I was dying of embarrassment inside.

hey, grumpy pirate----is this true???

 

[Miss Jasmine]

If it's a sincere compliment and not a harrassing, pervy, or creepy comment I have no problem with it.

I feel the same way. Heck, I have been known to tell male coworkers that I like their tie or comment on a new suit.

 

[addicted_to_WDW]

I want, no darn it, I demand, that my male coworkers tell me how hot I am at the beginning and end of each day.



Nah, but when I cut off 75% of my hair I want them to notice. I spend more time with these people than I do with my family.

 

[jodifla]

I have no problem with a compliment.

Like every stupidly over the top PC thing, sexual harrassment complaints have gotten way out of hand. A person of the opposite sex saying "That's a nice dress" or "Gee, I like your tie" is not sexual harassment. They are compliments.

Most normal people know the difference between sexual harrassment and a compliment. It is not sexual harrassment for a person of the opposite sex to notice a change in your appearance. Cutting 10 inches off your hair (which is what I recall the other post's OP said she did) would be a noticeable change and I would expect some comment on it from both my male and female colleagues.

Exactly! But leave it to the PC crowd to ruin compliments for the rest of us....

I'd be kinda ticked if the folks I worked with 10 hours a day didn't say something if I had a new haircut/great new outfit/lost 25 pounds.

It's common courtesy and a part of human interaction!

 

[Mr. & Mrs. Smith]

I also think it can be a generational thing. The man who called me a "long cool drink of water" was older, perhaps in his generation that was acceptable. I was mortified and made to feel humiliated, but I don't think he really meant for me to feel that way. KWIM? For that reason, I let it go during the meeting and kinda laughed it off, even though I was dying of embarrassment inside.

I think that phrase can mean two different things depending on the context and, don't worry, neither of them is creepy. 1. It means a person is tall and their height is seen as attractive. 2. The person is refreshing, like a drink of cold water on a hot summer's day.

 

[GRUMPY PIRATE]

Grumpy, you are soooo gonna get yourself in trouble!

Ummm, wouldn't be the first time (Wont be the last! )

 

[Tigger&Belle]

I think that phrase can mean two different things depending on the context and, don't worry, neither of them is creepy. 1. It means a person is tall and their height is seen as attractive. 2. The person is refreshing, like a drink of cold water on a hot summer's day.

This is basically what I learned when I googled it.

 

[GRUMPY PIRATE]

hey, grumpy pirate----is this true???

Maybe for a "generation" person that has been living under a rock! I like to joke about it but I think that particular comment is inappropriate, especially to a young male. If someone would have said that to anyone I was with, I would simply asked him what he meant. He might not know that it is a mild sexual innuendo, and could be embarrassed beyond belief!!

He simply might have meant that the boy was a tall, bright, well spoken person of a good wit!

I have also noted, as some other posters in this thread have said, that many people do not know how to give a compliment, Ya Hot babe ya KariC

 

[LiLIrishChick63]

to me it really doesn't matter. women comment on things like hair or shoes or make-up, so it's not a big deal to me if men do it, too.

 

[JunieJay]

I think that phrase can mean two different things depending on the context and, don't worry, neither of them is creepy. 1. It means a person is tall and their height is seen as attractive. 2. The person is refreshing, like a drink of cold water on a hot summer's day.

Maybe so. As I said, I did think he meant it as a compliment, it was the way he singled me out that made me feel so embarrassed. I walked in the room where there were other people I had never met, along with a few of my co-workers, my director and our VP. He very loudly said, "wow, aren't YOU a long cool drink of water!" and then asked me how tall I am. I really didn't want to answer him to be quite honest - I mean, I wouldn't ask him how old he is or how much he weighs, why does he think its appropriate to ask me my measurements? But I answered anyway. So then he reiterated the whole long cool drink of water thing. It made me feel uncomfortable and I'm usually not the squeemish type. I grew up with 7 brothers for goodness sake. I guess for the setting (a business meeting and a sales pitch on his part) it just seemed higjhly inappropriate.