Why You Should Charge Your Friends/Family to Stay on Your Points!

[Kickapoo Joie Juice]

We've all seen (and I've participated in) the threads where people bemoan the fact that after we've committed points to a reservation, our friends and or family members then ditch, leaving DVC members stuck with reservations they can't fully utilize. For years I thought it was just that I have a particularly stinky group of friends and family, but I just read this book and discovered that it's NORMAL for people to do this !

Check it out:

For a 1985 research paper entitled "The Psychology of Sunk Cost", scientists conducted an interesting real-life experiment. They randomly distributed discounts to buyers of season tickets to the theater. One group paid the normal ticket price of $15, a second group received a $2 discount per ticket; and a third sampling of lucky theater lovers recived $7 off each ticket.

The result? The people who paid more for their tickets ended up attending the performances more often than those who had received discounts.

The scientists labored mightily to explain why sunk costs have such a powerful effect on people, beyond the obvious, though irrational, notion of loss aversion: If people didn't go to a performance, they likely equated the unused ticket with a loss.

Therefore, the higher their ticket price, the greater the loss to be averted and the greater the likelihood that they would expend effort to see the performances.

Logically, there should not have been any difference in attendance. Not only did all the groups have similar inclinations to attend when they bought their tickets, they were all prepared to pay the same ticket price and they all had the same tickets in hand.

Ok, now I feel better about asking people to pay for their ressies. I'm actually doing them a favor!

 

[Kickapoo Joie Juice]

what? nobody else thinks this is interesting? I'm such a geek...

 

[JaxDisneyFans]

It totally explains why my DSis has bagged on concerts after I have purchased the tickets and why I have had to practically drag her to WDW after she was the one that wanted to go.

 

[Buckeye Fan]

This is just me, but I've never understood people backing out. Whether I paid full price or someone was kind enough to give it to me, something REALLY big would have to come up for us to back out.

I think the article perfectly sums it up, though. IF family members forked out $3,000+ for reservations and Joey had a baseball camp he couldn't miss, the parents would tell the coach they already had a commitment and he couldn't make it. When you don't have as much invested, it's a little easier to make different decisions.

Funny thing is...I only have one set of family members who understands our DVC obsession, AND they were DVC members before us! Thanks for posting!

 

[allshookup]

I can never seem to get family members to commit & I have quite a few that live in Florida. They also think I am completely nuts because my vacations are planned 1 to 2 years in advance, but they have no idea how things book up in WDW. If I ask them to join me, they always say "Oh I don't know if I can get the time off, or what I'll be doing, etc." I try to explain that I NEED to know, but it doesn't help so I usually give up. Problem is they tend to tell me a few weeks beforehand that they'd LOVE to come visit us in Disney & then I'm scrambling to try & find them a studio & it's never the same resort we're staying.

I recently asked my niece (lives in St. Pete) if her & her DD would join us in August & she said, "Oh I'm not sure because DD might be out of state visiting her father & I'm not sure I can get the time off, but we might come over on the weekend." I just ended up biting the bullet & booking a 2 BR figuring DS & DD can each have their own bed & if they DO end up joining us, I'll just add them to the reservation & put DS in the livingroom, but it is such a pain & more points than we would normally use. I would hate to charge anyone & I know my niece doesn't have much money & could not normally go to WDW otherwise, but my only wish is that family members would be more understanding of my need to know well in advance. But I do see how because they are not paying or booking, it is not something they HAVE to commit to so why bother.

 

[JasonDVC]

My theory is... take care of yourself. Give people a deadline for answer. If they can not commit then forget them. But, explain to them why you have to be so strict

 

[Kickapoo Joie Juice]

My theory is... take care of yourself. Give people a deadline for answer. If they can not commit then forget them. But, explain to them why you have to be so strict

My explanation would be "I have to be so strict because you won't pay me otherwise"...

 

[BEASLYBOO]

I think most studies are a waste of money! Everyone, including family and friends that I have invited to share my DVC accomodations have accepted and been appreciative. No one has ever cancelled at the last minute or left me holdig the bag. By the same token, I don't extend an invitation to anyone that I don't like or enjoy spending time with. Furthermore, if I accept someones invitation to travel then I go, I dont' cancel at the last minute. I don't get it, what's so hard about committing to a vacation.

Short of illness or death, I don't get it!

 

[homedad]

sorta OT- but I have relatives that were supposed to travel out of country with friends, the week before trip they said(my relatives) said "opps can't find passport I guess we can't go" and that was it. Not sorry, and wondered why friends were mad. Some people just don't get it.

 

[james'mommy]

I'm renting points to my sister for Nov 10. I'm not about to finance her deluxe resort stay but i am willing to rent her the points at fair market value so that she feels secure about her ressie. DH said the only way we can do it though is if sis thinks once we book the points that they are not refundable and that we won't book until she pays for the rental. A few little white lies won't hurt and it will keep her from screwing me out of money which she has done before.

 

[lacool]

I have had family members back out within the 30 day window. I guess they think it makes no difference to us whether we use points for a 1 bedroom or 2 bedroom, because the timeshare is prepaid. They just don't get it.

That said, we did end up spending a couple of nights at the AKL-concierge, something I would never have spent the points on willingly, but at that late stage it was "use 'em or lose 'em." We did enjoy the luxury.

 

[disfanforlife]

I agree, but am a little different situation. We will be staying in a two bedroom - that is our plan for every visit. We invited MIL to go with us on our next trip and are not charging her. We would be using our points for the same villa anyways we are not getting a bigger one for her. She will be buying her own airline ticket, park tickets, and food.

 

[bobbiwoz]

I understand, but I don't want to charge and I won't. The people I invite are important to me, and being with them is the main thing. Another consideration is only a very few of our guests can get to WDW without flying, and they usually need ME, so we know if someone isn't coming before 31 days out. If anything happens differently in the future, I'll deal with it, we would probably just spread out more in the villas that were booked.

Right now, I have a DCuz who has to have a cash room, she's paying, because she only found out 5 weeks ahead that she could come. If I could get her a room, I certainly would.

Bobbi

 

[dianeschlicht]

I wouldn't feel right charging someone I have asked to join us. To me, the ability to "give" them the palce to stay that they would not likely be able to afford otherwise, is the best part. Oh, and we have only had one couple back out on us, and THEY will not be asked to join us again.

 

[littlestar]

My family never backs out on me. If it's free (and it is), they will be there - I can always count on somebody to use our points or our Marriott week. I am a very popular aunt with my nieces and nephews and naturally, the world's greatest mom, too, according to the kids. (Laughter).

 

[curan69]

After several years of inviting friends to our cottage and having them back out (or just not show up!!) i came up with a plan.

I sent out formal invitations with an RSVP date. I made them up like a wedding invitation. When it was more formal it seemed i got a timely response and they were less likely to back out.

if they did back out (without a darn good reason) they got scratched off the list for the next year.

 

[ahalla]

We asked my sister and her family to join us on our October vacation and they were extremely excited, and yes they would come and no they would not back out. They reassured us the same thing, just before we borrowed most of our points from 2010 to get them their own room. We of course asked for nothing in return. Yep, you guessed it. They bailed on us. They are in Jamaica right now w/out their kids, cause well they could! We have learned our lesson well!

 

[disfanforlife]

We asked my sister and her family to join us on our October vacation and they were extremely excited, and yes they would come and no they would not back out. They reassured us the same thing, just before we borrowed most of our points from 2010 to get them their own room. We of course asked for nothing in return. Yep, you guessed it. They bailed on us. They are in Jamaica right now w/out their kids, cause well they could! We have learned our lesson well!

That is so rude! If my brother ever did anything like that to me, I would be livid!

 

[Alexander]

Nope--don't charge family either. We all fly, so once their flights are booked, I know they are committed. Something really big would have to come up for any of us to cancel. If it were something that big, we really wouldn't care about the points.

 

[Kickapoo Joie Juice]

OP here.

From what I understand from the books I've been reading on behavioral economics, what our friends and family are doing is changing something that is a social contract into a market contract.

Social contracts are not broken because it would bring shame/humiliation/family anger. Sort of like standing up at the Thanksgiving dinner table and pulling out a couple of benjamins, handing them to Grandma and saying, thanks for the terrific dinner, Grandma! You can see how most of us would be *really* insulted by it.

Market contracts are broken all the time because they're about money, not about societal bonds. The only consequence is that you *might* lose out on some money, and since you're not the DVC owner, you probably lose out on nothing because it's somebody else's points.

We, as owners, consider the DVC vacations that we're sharing as a social contract. If your friends/family consider it a market contract, then you're going to be in trouble unless you invoke the Sunk Cost principle-where it doesn't matter whether they regard it as a social contract or a market contract, because the money out of their pocket is too much to change their minds.

So the secret is, I think, having a *very* clear understanding of whether your friends/family regard your invitation as a social contract or a market one.

In other words, if they've ever bailed on a social engagement on you before, they definitely don't value social contracts in general and would probably look at your DVC invitation in market terms...