Why would they do this--sports team related?

[FireDancer]

Seriously?? I think you are going WAY out on a limb by saying that her not participating in this tournament may determine her teammates' futures.

Unless the punishment for losing is death of course.

 

[Tinker'n'Fun]

Unless the punishment for losing is death of course.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

I could easily turn it around and say, "versus a family commitment." See what I did there?

Of course I see it. It's what's been done throughout this entire thread.

What happened to "we don't know"?

The graduation parties I've been to have been just that:

 

[ICF]

This thread may last longer than the girls golf season......

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Seriously?? I think you are going WAY out on a limb by saying that her not participating in this tournament may determine her teammates' futures.

The limb I'm going out on relates to what was said in this thread about scholarships. Those don't determine futures?

IT'S NONE OF HER BUSINESS!

I beg to differ. If her daughter's future is affected by it, it is her business.

 

[Pea-n-Me]

Hey, it's been a fun discussion. Off to honor my commitments now.

 

[Toad_Passenger]

It could well be that Grandpa turns into a pumpkin after dark, so yes, if that were the case, than by all means she would need to be there before that occurs. And yes, I'm being sarcastic to make the point of ridiculousness that there would be such dire circumstances at this girl's home that night during the party that she couldn't arrive two hours later than planned, after she fulfilled her obligation to play golf with her team that day.

You make jokes, but there are circumstances that could be that "dire" although that's not the term I'd use. My grandmother was in a VA hospital. They had strict time periods when the patients could be "signed out" and when they had to return to their room. So while your "turns into a pumpkin" routine may seem farfetched, in actuality, situations do exist where time is of the essence.

And, again, I'm 100% sports guy. I coach, play, and am bringing both of my kids up to be involved with sports. Although the only thing DS(3-months) can do is join the "rolling over" squad right now. So I'm not being anti-sports. I'm just saying it is a HUGE stretch to say that because of this ONE instance (which we don't even know the whole story behind) that this girl is some sort of quitter or unreliable person. Especially when her other accolades seem to say otherwise. Of course this is the DIS and "stretches" and hyperbole seem to be the only means of debate around here.

 

[SeaShelley]

The limb I'm going out on relates to what was said in this thread about scholarships. Those don't determine futures?


I beg to differ. If her daughter's future is affected by it, it is her business.

I could be mistaken, but I believe that scholarships have already been determined and awarded to graduating seniors - at least to the seniors I know. As for sports scholarships, I was under the impression that these were based upon individual performance - not how well the team does.

It's not the scholarship that determines a person's future...the person does that all on their own. Does it help? Possibly.

I have a known a few kids who received wonderful scholarships, only to get to college and be so overwhelmed by the experience that they either flunked out or chose to come back home. Conversely, I have know several kids who didn't get anything...academically or athletically, in the way of scholarships, made it through college and have incredibly brilliant futures ahead of them.

 

[luvsJack]

Come on, luvsJack, that's not what I asked you.

Touche'

Ok, let me approach it another way. If I asked him and he came to me with that statement, I would take what he said into consideration and then say "but this is why you have to miss the game. . . " And I would expect him to miss the game. Would I be proud that he felt he should honor his commitment? Yes. Would I want him to honor that commitment only to dishonor one to his family? No

There are reasons to have to break an agreement, miss a commitment, or break a promise. If the girl had been missing games all year and had not acted serious about playing or being on the team the whole time; I would be in agreement with you; I just don't see missing ONE tournament as being a serious flaw in the girl's character.

 

[golfgal]

Actually this is very easy for me to answer. DS plays on a team with 17 very talented players who each play a small part in the "whole" of the team. This team succeeds with or without absent players because it was set up that way, on the premise that a child should always follow the family, school, sports rule. My DS's future will not be determined by a single "soccer" game.

On the other hand, DD's achievements in school were comprised of "her" hard work for 4 years as an individual (for the most part, I realize that she may have had certain assignments in groups) but ultimately her grades were achieved by her work as an individual. She was being honored for this hard work. She has 1 ceremony for this achievement, not a 16+ game season.

Ultimately, I believe that my children will succeed in life from their education first and foremost. That is why I have included articles about percentages of children that will go to college on sports scholarships. The vast majority of all children that go to college do so on academic scholarships and grants.

Forgot to answer your first question: If someone prevented DD from getting the award (and this is really the only feasable way) would mean they earned it and deserved the award more than my daughter. I would have no hard feelings for this person, but definetely would be happy for them, and would comfort my daughter if she needed me.

It is a lot easier to equalize with 17 players then it is with 6. The hole they leave is a LOT bigger.

My point is- in the END (after high school) who is going to remember this one tournament? Who's life is this ONE tournament going to change forever? I have friends who played and won state championships- now that we are adults it matters SQUAT. It only still matters to those who hit their peak in high school.

Participating in high school sports- or band- or drama- or chess etc is great for a student- missing one tournament game is not the end of the world.

Frankly, I do think the girl should play. The fact is her parents made a decision, their reasons are theirs. She can't be forced to participate- get over it.

This is the tournament that decides who makes it to the state tournament, ONE tournament IS a big deal.

Day one of the tournament is over. The JV girl, as predicted shot a 100. The course they play tomorrow is even more difficult so that score will be higher. The girl in question came to watch today, but complained all day about missing a dodge ball tournament they were having for one of her classes .

 

[Mermaid02]

It is a lot easier to equalize with 17 players then it is with 6. The hole they leave is a LOT bigger.



This is the tournament that decides who makes it to the state tournament, ONE tournament IS a big deal.

Day one of the tournament is over. The JV girl, as predicted shot a 100. The course they play tomorrow is even more difficult so that score will be higher. The girl in question came to watch today, but complained all day about missing a dodge ball tournament they were having for one of her classes .

I think said senior girl has bowed out because of the drama surrounding this golf team. I know I would.

 

[golfgal]

I think said senior girl has bowed out because of the drama surrounding this golf team. I know I would.

There was no drama until she created it...

 

[Mermaid02]

There was no drama until she created it...

Sorry, diet pepsi just came out my nose...........

 

[SaraJayne]

Sorry, diet pepsi just came out my nose...........

That's what I was thinking.

 

[AshleyW]

There was no drama until she created it...

What the heck? She made a decision (or her parents did) to schedule her graduation party during a golf tournament. Fine. Does it stink? Maybe, but that's certainly not creating drama. It sounds like the only "drama" is her team mates and certain parents talking so much smack about her behind her back. I'm sure the golf coach would be SO impressed to hear how the girls and parents have been talking. Very classy.

 

[mumom95]

There was no drama until she created it...

Now that's funny.

We have how many pages of internet drama going on right here about the poor girl and I don't remember her posting on it once.

Sorry, but I'm not going to believe for one minute that if you would go to the hassle of starting this thread and continuing to post on it, that you aren't also creating a good amount of drama about the topic in real life also.

 

[Toad_Passenger]

It is a lot easier to equalize with 17 players then it is with 6. The hole they leave is a LOT bigger.



This is the tournament that decides who makes it to the state tournament, ONE tournament IS a big deal.

Day one of the tournament is over. The JV girl, as predicted shot a 100. The course they play tomorrow is even more difficult so that score will be higher. The girl in question came to watch today, but complained all day about missing a dodge ball tournament they were having for one of her classes .

Thanks for more "second hand" information, that is irrelevant to the conversation anyway.

Also, how could she watch? When I played Varsity golf, the only people allowed on the course were the players and that was a rule directly from the State High School Sporting Authority.. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.

 

[Mermaid02]

Thanks for more "second hand" information, that is irrelevant to the conversation anyway.

Also, how could she watch? When I played Varsity golf, the only people allowed on the course were the players and that was a rule directly from the State High School Sporting Authority.. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.

Sustained.

Sorry- too much Law and Order.

 

[golfgal]

Now that's funny.

We have how many pages of internet drama going on right here about the poor girl and I don't remember her posting on it once.

Sorry, but I'm not going to believe for one minute that if you would go to the hassle of starting this thread and continuing to post on it, that you aren't also creating a good amount of drama about the topic in real life also.

Actually, since I have this lovely outlet for the "drama" no one has said one word in "real life" to anyone on the team, it wasn't brought up at the tournament, no one talked about it. I had a lovely conversation with this girl about when she leaves for college, what classes she will have freshman year. How much fun it is going up 2 weeks early and having the campus to yourself. See, there is this thing called MATURITY.

Thanks for more "second hand" information, that is irrelevant to the conversation anyway.

Also, how could she watch? When I played Varsity golf, the only people allowed on the course were the players and that was a rule directly from the State High School Sporting Authority.. No ifs, ands, or buts about it.

Spectators are most certainly allowed on the course. We watched as well. Spectators are not allowed to talk to players nor are they allowed to interfere in the game. They ARE allowed to help find lost balls and that is it.

 

[Toad_Passenger]

Spectators are most certainly allowed on the course. We watched as well. Spectators are not allowed to talk to players nor are they allowed to interfere in the game. They ARE allowed to help find lost balls and that is it.

I played with a couple of guys who would've benefited from this immensely.