Why would they do this--sports team related?

[golfgal]

DD15 is on the varsity golf team. They have their section tournament this Thursday and Friday. The team that wins goes on to the state tournament. They have a VERY good chance of making it to the state, or I should say they DID. DD told us yesterday that one of the seniors on the team scheduled her graduation party for Friday night which means she can't play in the section tournament at all . Why in the WORLD would they do that??? There are only 6 girls that play at a time. Now they have to bring up a JV player, who is an ok player but not as good as this senior. I just don't get it. This senior is going to college on a soccer scholarship so it isn't like sports are a big part of their lives.

 

[powellrj]

Maybe there was a family reason why she had to have the party when she did. It could have been the only weekend that a certain family member could attend or maybe it was the only weeked the family could work it out.

 

[bgirl29]

Maybe they didnt pay any attention to the golf schedule when they planned the open house? and they had already sent out the invitations before they realized that she should be playing golf instead?? not saying it is right maybe they just made a huge mistake and didnt want to change the date after the invites were sent out???

so if now is golf season in your area when is soccer? just curious because my dd plays both.

 

[schmitty]

How dare this high school girl care more about her own graduation than a golf tournament?!?!?!? What is the world coming too? A gold tournament is one of the most important thing in a high school seniors life? This girl needs to get her priorities in check. What a selfish brat!

 

[golfgal]

Maybe they didnt pay any attention to the golf schedule when they planned the open house? and they had already sent out the invitations before they realized that she should be playing golf instead?? not saying it is right maybe they just made a huge mistake and didnt want to change the date after the invites were sent out???

so if now is golf season in your area when is soccer? just curious because my dd plays both.

Soccer is in the fall, golf in the spring.

How dare this high school girl care more about her own graduation than a golf tournament?!?!?!? What is the world coming too? A gold tournament is one of the most important thing in a high school seniors life? This girl needs to get her priorities in check. What a selfish brat!

She isn't missing GRADUATION, they scheduled a PARTY. Graduation is on Saturday (our oldest is graduating too). She signed up for the team, committed to playing for that team, bumped another girl from the team so she could play varsity, could have given another girl a chance to play varsity if she knew she couldn't commit to the schedule. She also missed another big tournament for another commitment that could have been scheduled around the golf season very easily.

I am sure they weren't paying attention to the schedule but she has been on the team for 4 years, her sister for 4 years before that and her other sister for 4 years before that and the schedule is pretty much the same each year and these section tournaments are scheduled a year in advance and our own schedule has been out since February.

 

[OceanAnnie]

I totally understand your frustration. The player's actions are effecting the entire teams chance for the state tournament.

 

[PatsGirl]

I agree. It's just not right. When you belong to a team, you need to commit to that team. It's a party, not her graduation and she needs to figure out how to fix this.

 

[allison443]

Is the tournament really far away? Because isn't the tournament during the day and you said her party is at night...I don't get the conflict.

My dd had a senior girl on her track team who was one of the top runners but quit part way through the spring season. She was going to college on a basketball scholarship and didn't want to get injured doing track. The team didn't have her for counties and states. That's different than missing one tournament due to a party though.

 

[dis-happy]

Is the school year already finished? I assume so if graduation ceremonies are being held on Sat. I can see how a senior feels done with the whole thing even if it does let the team down. When are the state finals? Maybe she already has plans to be at the beach or a job or something now that school is out and knows she couldn't do the state finals either....in which case giving another player a chance to play in the spot is more fair. ????? Just wondering.....

 

[golfgal]

Is the tournament really far away? Because isn't the tournament during the day and you said her party is at night...I don't get the conflict.

My dd had a senior girl on her track team who was one of the top runners but quit part way through the spring season. She was going to college on a basketball scholarship and didn't want to get injured doing track. The team didn't have her for counties and states. That's different than missing one tournament due to a party though.

Friday is day 2 of the sections. T-times start at 1:30, the course is about 40 minutes away (it is where the state tournament is held too so that is why we drive so far-no one cares about the drive). Her party is scheduled from 5-8. The earliest she could get home would be about 7:00--why not just have the party from 7-whatever???

Is the school year already finished? I assume so if graduation ceremonies are being held on Sat. I can see how a senior feels done with the whole thing even if it does let the team down. When are the state finals? Maybe she already has plans to be at the beach or a job or something now that school is out and knows she couldn't do the state finals either....in which case giving another player a chance to play in the spot is more fair. ????? Just wondering.....

The last day of school for seniors is Friday, Graduation is Saturday night, the rest of the kids get out June 11th. If she knew she wasn't going to compete at regions or state she should have opted to play JV all season and let one of the JV kids get the experience at playing varsity all season so a JV kid isn't thrown into their first varsity match for SECTIONS on a team that has a good chance of qualifying for the state tournament.

Side note, not sure how relevant, this is the same girl who's mom kept putting up a stink about our DD playing varsity ahead of her for the past 3 years and now this??? Your scores are what they are and our DD is the #1 player on the team and this girl is #6.

 

[Magic Mom]

Friday is day 2 of the sections. T-times start at 1:30, the course is about 40 minutes away (it is where the state tournament is held too so that is why we drive so far-no one cares about the drive). Her party is scheduled from 5-8. The earliest she could get home would be about 7:00--why not just have the party from 7-whatever???



The last day of school for seniors is Friday, Graduation is Saturday night, the rest of the kids get out June 11th. If she knew she wasn't going to compete at regions or state she should have opted to play JV all season and let one of the JV kids get the experience at playing varsity all season so a JV kid isn't thrown into their first varsity match for SECTIONS on a team that has a good chance of qualifying for the state tournament.

Side note, not sure how relevant, this is the same girl who's mom kept putting up a stink about our DD playing varsity ahead of her for the past 3 years and now this??? Your scores are what they are and our DD is the #1 player on the team and this girl is #6.

Meh, if she's #6 on the team, it won't be a huge deal to bring up the top JV player. If her mom had to fight for her place on varsity, I can't see why it would be a big deal for her to not be there. I'm sure the girl realized this too and it factored into her decision.

 

[ksjayhawks]

What the senior girl and her family did is not right--she is letting the team down. They may think since she is the number 6 player that it doesn't matter if she is there or not.

I thought at first you were talking about the number 1 or 2 player, not the number 6 player on the team. So, hopefully the number 7 player can step up and meet the challenge. You may be surprised.

 

[golfgal]

Meh, if she's #6 on the team, it won't be a huge deal to bring up the top JV player. If her mom had to fight for her place on varsity, I can't see why it would be a big deal for her to not be there. I'm sure the girl realized this too and it factored into her decision.

What the senior girl and her family did is not right--she is letting the team down. They may think since she is the number 6 player that it doesn't matter if she is there or not.

I thought at first you were talking about the number 1 or 2 player, not the number 6 player on the team. So, hopefully the number 7 player can step up and meet the challenge. You may be surprised.

Even at #6 she can still fire off a good score to help the team if need be. She is #6 in overall scoring average but the spread between #1-#6 is just under 5 strokes. Their last tournament she had the lowest score on the team-DD didn't play because of a wrist injury. While this JV player MIGHT have a couple good rounds the likelihood of her breaking 100 is slim (she has yet to do that on a regulation course) where as this senior will shoot somewhere between 85-90 most likely. It is a big difference. They take the top 4 scores so it is possible they would not need her score but having her in the line up gives them 6 players that can score low vs 5--it just really improves the odds and given that one or two strokes WILL make a difference for the section tournament, it is a big deal.

 

[Stacerita]

Let the girl have her party on Friday if that is what she wants. There may be a million reasons why she needs to have the graduation party on Friday. You say your DD is #1 on the team, so who cares if #6 isn't there. She is graduating and will not be in high school anymore. Let it go and move on. Worry about your own kid and not others and what their family has decided to do for a graduation party.

 

[aduck126]

who is more upset about this, you or your daughter?

 

[Mickey's Minion]

DD15 is on the varsity golf team. They have their section tournament this Thursday and Friday. The team that wins goes on to the state tournament. They have a VERY good chance of making it to the state, or I should say they DID. DD told us yesterday that one of the seniors on the team scheduled her graduation party for Friday night which means she can't play in the section tournament at all . Why in the WORLD would they do that??? There are only 6 girls that play at a time. Now they have to bring up a JV player, who is an ok player but not as good as this senior. I just don't get it. This senior is going to college on a soccer scholarship so it isn't like sports are a big part of their lives.

Soccer is in the fall, golf in the spring.

She isn't missing GRADUATION, they scheduled a PARTY. Graduation is on Saturday (our oldest is graduating too). She signed up for the team, committed to playing for that team, bumped another girl from the team so she could play varsity, could have given another girl a chance to play varsity if she knew she couldn't commit to the schedule. She also missed another big tournament for another commitment that could have been scheduled around the golf season very easily.

I am sure they weren't paying attention to the schedule but she has been on the team for 4 years, her sister for 4 years before that and her other sister for 4 years before that and the schedule is pretty much the same each year and these section tournaments are scheduled a year in advance and our own schedule has been out since February.

Friday is day 2 of the sections. T-times start at 1:30, the course is about 40 minutes away (it is where the state tournament is held too so that is why we drive so far-no one cares about the drive). Her party is scheduled from 5-8. The earliest she could get home would be about 7:00--why not just have the party from 7-whatever???

The last day of school for seniors is Friday, Graduation is Saturday night, the rest of the kids get out June 11th. If she knew she wasn't going to compete at regions or state she should have opted to play JV all season and let one of the JV kids get the experience at playing varsity all season so a JV kid isn't thrown into their first varsity match for SECTIONS on a team that has a good chance of qualifying for the state tournament.

Side note, not sure how relevant, this is the same girl who's mom kept putting up a stink about our DD playing varsity ahead of her for the past 3 years and now this??? Your scores are what they are and our DD is the #1 player on the team and this girl is #6.

You are right, completely irrelevant.

Even at #6 she can still fire off a good score to help the team if need be. She is #6 in overall scoring average but the spread between #1-#6 is just under 5 strokes. Their last tournament she had the lowest score on the team-DD didn't play because of a wrist injury. While this JV player MIGHT have a couple good rounds the likelihood of her breaking 100 is slim (she has yet to do that on a regulation course) where as this senior will shoot somewhere between 85-90 most likely. It is a big difference. They take the top 4 scores so it is possible they would not need her score but having her in the line up gives them 6 players that can score low vs 5--it just really improves the odds and given that one or two strokes WILL make a difference for the section tournament, it is a big deal.

First of all, how does the coach feel about this? If he approved it, it makes absolutely no difference how you feel about it.

While I don't agree with somebody bailing on a team that they made a commitment to, there may be reasons she has to have this party.

By your own admission, there are 6 girls on the team and they only take the top 4 scores. This girl is #6 of 6, so rather unlikely that her scores will be included. It doesn't sound like it will be that much of a hit to the team. The top 5 girls will just have to play smarter to make sure their scores are the top 5.

This sounds more like you have an intense dislike for this family and it is more a personal vendetta than something that will likely impact the team much.

Give the JV girl a chance.

 

[krcit]

I'm with you OP. Being on a team is a commitment.

 

[Tink888]

I understand your frustration but IMHO I don't find anything wrong with what the senior did. In her mind, she probably figures she's graduating and she's moving on with the next phase of her life. The party might not have worked well for the team, but it might have been what worked best for her and her family and that's what's important.

I wouldn't expect any senior to plan their life around the off chance that they might have a really good season in a particular sport they participate in.

If your DD's golf team bombs in sectionals it won't be because of one player, it will be because of the entire team, just as if they won it would also be due to a team effort.

 

[Hillbeans]

I'm with you OP. Being on a team is a commitment.

I completely agree...especially in High school where there are things like Scholarships on the line.

My 9 YO plays sports and his schedule of games is not the most convenient (7 Saturday's in April and May along with mid-week games). I think it's important to not miss games but we did have a few rain-outs this year and they rescheduled the last game on the day DS4 graduates from pre-school. We're going to try and get DS can go to the game for 1 hour - at least we're trying to fit everything in even if it means a lot more running around.

 

[dis-happy]

Sounds like the team made the finals because she was on there; if she had stepped off the team back in Feb. to let the JV player have the spot the team wouldn't even be going (possibly) to state finals, right? Really not seeing what the big deal is other than the disappointment that she chose her graduation weekend (once in a lifetime) over the match.

We started the season with 6 (the very minimum needed) tennis players. One dropped out shortly into the season. Even though we played almost the entire season with 2 losses up front (one singles match, one doubles match forfeited) we still won almost every time in our lineup, due to the fact that you win starting at 5-4. As someone else pointed out, it's up to the WHOLE team, not just one person. The strong players will still carry the day.