Why do people bring nanny's?

[Nancyg56]

I don't know - I haven't always been the model mom -- but my DD thinks I've been pretty fun -- I don't think she'd trade me. I don't think you need to be sad for her. And I'm sure everyone is , um , kidding about being worst mom...

I think you rock, Aunt Polly!


I bet the people joking about "worst Mom" have nothing to worry about in the parenting department. They can make light of themselves. I also have made mistakes along the way, and I know that my adult children haven't dragged me onto Oprah yet. I can also joke now, because they are finer adults (who still let me know where I scarred them for life, something about corderoy pants, the wrong sneakers, and red socks)

Now my daughter, a working mom.....yes she works, no she will not cook, and yes she hates to clean.....is a fabulous mother. In her family, she provides the benefits, the excellent retirement program, the college tuition program, and yes, if something happens to her DH, she can provide a safe and strong home for herself as well as her daughter. Her DD has never stayed one day in daycare, but they heard all kinds of snippy remarks because her DH was the caregiver (cooked too). Now I care for my beautiful DGD, and she hears that I am not an educator.

These are personal decisions, and I cannot understand how it is possible to really know what is the best way for any other family to raise their kids. It is only possible to know what works for you and your family.

Oh well, off my soapbox

 

[Aidensmom]

I can't believe how some of these posts making jokes about 'being the worst' parent. How sad for your children.

My son is actually one of the happiest children you ever met. And what I said in my previoius post is true. He goes to daycare while his father and I work, and we are leaving him home when we go to WDW for the weekend at the end of the month. And there is nothing sad about it.

 

[ToriLammy]

I can't believe how some of these posts making jokes about 'being the worst' parent. How sad for your children.

Not sad at all. Most normal children understand their parents are simply human and all that comes with that. I think my children would be proud of me for not trying to fit someone elses' mold of the "ideal parent." It in fact gives them the ability to lead their lives without succumbing to peer pressure and unrealistic ideas of what they are "supposed to do." While not the greatest parent according to some on the DIS I am a good role model for my two teenage children and I know they wouldn't want me to be any other way

 

[Mickeyhugger]

Now my daughter, a working mom.....yes she works, no she will not cook, and yes she hates to clean.....is a fabulous mother. In her family, she provides the benefits, the excellent retirement program, the college tuition program, and yes, if something happens to her DH, she can provide a safe and strong home for herself as well as her daughter. Her DD has never stayed one day in daycare, but they heard all kinds of snippy remarks because her DH was the caregiver (cooked too). Now I care for my beautiful DGD, and she hears that I am not an educator.

Sounds like a great situation. Your daughter's DH is wonderful too, to have been the caregiver and to cook. No 'snippy' remarks here. I think it's good when mom or dad is at home.

 

[dis ms.]

I can't believe how some of these posts making jokes about 'being the worst' parent. How sad for your children.

Umm, how should I say this so that it's really clear?: it's...a...joke. I think these children are fortunate to have parents with a sense of humor!

Now, with that said, I'm a SAHM. Do you guys think it would be bad for me to get a nanny so that I can DIS? These two kids bugging me for snacks and storytime makes it hard for me to focus on riveting threads such as this one. (inserts grinning eyes smiley to convey a joking tone).

auntpolly, you never cease to crack me up!

 

[yyzgurl]

I'm sorry but if you think I'm bashing so be it. I also think its crazy to send a 2 yo old to "school". He will be in school half his life, why start so young. He may like it now, but to me thats just the quicker he'll get burned out on it. And good for you that you have someone to cook , clean and do your laundry so you can spend"quality" time with your son. We don't have the money for a nanny or au pair or whatever you call it, so I'm the poor slob who has to do it myself. Like I said before, I like spending time with my children. They grow up wayyy too fast. And when my kids do something for the 1st time, I don't want the nanny telling me about it, I want to see it myself.

I have been there for every one of the DS' "firsts". No one had to tell me about them, as I have stated before that he spends 90% of his time with me. I doubt he will have burnout by being a fun preschool setting this early in his life. The entire 2 hours he's there a day is hardly "too much" for him. I can attest to what a benefit preschool has been for him. He was a painfully shy toddler, but after a couple of months of school, he's a little social butterfly. He has truly blossomed in school and has learned so much in his Montessori setting. If children who enter school early "burnout", you would have an entire society full of burnouts as such a large majority of the population use daycares, preschools, and such.

I agree that I am extremely lucky to be able to afford a nanny to help with the household and to send my DS to preschool. I would make do without if we couldn't afford it. I don't find these things ESSENTIAL. I know they are a luxury but people shouldn't be berated for having these luxury. Having a nanny or putting your child in daycare does not mean that you are a poor parent. And this might just make you fall over, but I am a SAHM and enjoy it immensely.

 

[allie&mattsmom]

Personally, I don't care either way if someone has a nanny or not. We don't have a nanny but like another poster said we too have "Grannies" and we get a lot of help from our moms. And everyones situation is different. I can't say if we had no family close and I worked full time what I would do. Our friends are always telling us how lucky we are because we've never had to once hire a babysitter, and our children are 8 & 10. My mom & DH's mom live close by and love to have our kids. We (and our kids) are spoiled by the Grandmas. Our friends are right, we are lucky. We also take the mom's to Disney with us most of the time. We even took DH's mom to Hawaii last year and are going on the Disney cruise in May with my mom. Don't get me wrong, we don't treat them like hired help, we take them on trips b/c we enjoy spending time with them. Do they help with the kids on trips? You betcha, but we don't expect it and we certainly would never treat them like hired help. I look at our situation as a win/win situation, the grandmas enjoy helping with the kids and it gives me and DH some time to do our own thing. We're going on one of our first "just the four of us" trips to Disney in a few weeks, no grandmas are going. I hope we survive (Just kiddin')

 

[dis ms.]

You know what I think is sad? That so many people on this thread feel they have to defend the choices they have made for THEIR children. So what if you have a nanny? So what if you don't? So what if you take a *GASP* non-family member on a vacation with you? So what if you don't?

Why the attacks? If you don't agree with someone's choices for THEIR child, don't make those choices for your own children, but don't bash other parents because they don't do it your way.

There aren't many absolutes in parenting. My kids didn't come with instruction manuals. I do the best I can to be the best parent I can. All of us here do, I think.

So, there!

(dis ms. carefully steps off her soapbox...)

 

[Tracey1974]

My little (21) sister is coming with us next month to help us with our then 3 month old. We are driving down from PA and could use the help in the car. Hubby and I may go out to dinner at our resort one night by ourselves. We just hosted an infant CPR class at our house through a friend at the Red Cross for anyone that would be watching our son (family and friends) and that is the only way we would leave him with someone.
I don't know who is more excited about going, her or me!

I was a nanny (not live-in) to a family for 4 years and working for them helped me to put myself through school. It is because of how they managed with both parents working and how close they still were as a family that I don't feel as bad having to return to work next month after being home on maternity leave with my son since June. I'd love to be able to stay home, but it just isn't in the cards yet. At least now that I am going back to work, we can hire a cleaning lady!

I wouldn't get one if I wasn't working!

 

[madge]

hi
i will probably get flamed for this but why take very young children to disney at all. why not wait until they canwalk,talk eat and sleep at a reasonable time? i am amazed at the number of really tiny babies we see at parks. also mistified at the number of threads on various forums asking which rides they can take their 6/7/8/ 10 month baby on. why bother? i realise a large family could wait a long time but they could all enjoy it together

at what age do you consider a child "old enough" to enjoy a WDW vacation? If I wanted until my youngest DD was "old enough", her oldest brother would likely be in college. Hardly fair to him, I think. My youngest DD will never remember her earliest experiences--vacations, holidays, etc....but I will. She LOVED everything about WDW at 8 months--the colors, music, etc. We considered leaving her with the grands while we took the older boys, but in the end decided that it wouldn't be the same without her. And it wouldn't have been--

DD turns 4 during our Fall vacation, and I'm not sure who is more excited about the celebration, DH & I, DD, or her 2 older brothers, LOL!

 

[EsmeraldaX]

How do you know they were nannies and not aunts, cousins, older siblings, etc.? Just a question, not a flame.

Maybe it was the CM who plays Mary Poppins giving them a guided tour??

Good question though. I've never met a nanny who wore an I am a Nanny shirt around.

Also, I'm wondering why the OP cares? Maybe the children are special needs and the nanny is actually a nurse? Maybe the nanny has been with the family for years and the children wanted her to go. Maybe the parents wanted to take the nanny as a special treat. Who cares.

 

[allie&mattsmom]

at what age do you consider a child "old enough" to enjoy a WDW vacation? If I wanted until my youngest DD was "old enough", her oldest brother would likely be in college. Hardly fair to him, I think. My youngest DD will never remember her earliest experiences--vacations, holidays, etc....but I will. She LOVED everything about WDW at 8 months--the colors, music, etc. We considered leaving her with the grands while we took the older boys, but in the end decided that it wouldn't be the same without her. And it wouldn't have been--

DD turns 4 during our Fall vacation, and I'm not sure who is more excited about the celebration, DH & I, DD, or her 2 older brothers, LOL!

I 100% have to agree with you madge. We've been taking our kids since DS was 6 mos & DD was 2. They may not have the memories, but we do. Plus, all of the fantastic photos that are displayed everywhere in our home. I wouldn't change a thing. IMO, you're never too young to go to disney!

 

[roque]

People such as that shouldn't have children then. Why did they have them? Their children a loving parent at home to take care of them as much as any other child. That's self-centeredness.

DISCUSSION OVER........"THESE PEOPLE' SHOULD NOT HAVE CHILDREN

 

[Blueeyes101817]

the family that i babysit for--not quite nanny, but would watch the kids every day from 3-8, took me with them to disney--i gotto be good friends with the family and they wanted to bring me..i did help out but didnt do everything--we would do baby swaps so i could go on the rides too...it was one of the best experiences!

 

[DVCLiz]

Boy, there was a time when this kind of thread would have had me in tears about my choice to work and have child care for my daughters - now it just makes me laugh. Anyone who is so self-righteous as to declare their choices the only right ones are the bad parents, in my opinion.

I've found that most families function very well, whether or not they take young babies to WDW, take those trips as a family or with childcare, do their own cooking and cleaning or have it done for them, etc., etc., etc.

There's really not going to be any difference between kids raised by a SAHM or by a working mom, between kids whose moms cooked every night and those who ordered pizza, or those who went to Nana's house while Mom and Dad partied down on a trip or those who went to WDW with or without a babysitter along. They are all going to grow up to be fine citizens and loving people.

 

[Steamboat Girlie]

I'm not having kids unless we can afford a Nanny. And she'd go *everywhere* with us. In fact, no she wouldn't. She'd stay at home with the kids while DH and I romped our way through WDW!

 

[Missy1961]

You know what I think is sad? That so many people on this thread feel they have to defend the choices they have made for THEIR children. So what if you have a nanny? So what if you don't? So what if you take a *GASP* non-family member on a vacation with you? So what if you don't?

Why the attacks? If you don't agree with someone's choices for THEIR child, don't make those choices for your own children, but don't bash other parents because they don't do it your way.

There aren't many absolutes in parenting. My kids didn't come with instruction manuals. I do the best I can to be the best parent I can. All of us here do, I think.

So, there!

(dis ms. carefully steps off her soapbox...)

I totally agree with this post. Well said!

 

[huey duey & luey]

People such as that shouldn't have children then. Why did they have them? Their children a loving parent at home to take care of them as much as any other child. That's self-centeredness.

If I spent all of that time, energy, determination, dedication and money on becoming a dr, there is no way I would not practice medicine. Maybe, I wouldn't work full time but I can't se doing all of that work and not be a practicing dr. I don't think it is selfish at all.

 

[poohandwendy]

LOL, this thread cracks me up. Thanks pollyanna, for the heads up, I really needed this....

LOL, I am amazed at the amount of people who really think they are all-knowing in how others should parent. That there is one correct way and that others who do things differently 'self-centered'. Not only that, but they think they shouldnt even have kids? Wow, who made y'all God? Incredible.

 

[DawnCt1]

Only 2 of the families had more than 3 kids. The rest were the 2 kids. And I saw both parents there. So one wasn't back in the hotel with the kids.

Again, I am not trying to come down on people. Just curious.

Maybe they wanted to show their appreciation for a nanny who works hard for them all year.