Why do parents do this

[BigAlsGal]

My first post came off string just surprised that parents are telling there kids so young these days, so it is not that I am not over it just surprised, think about it if you tell your kids at2 that is only 48 months of them believing. Sorry if u come of judgmental that is the last thing I want to be but I am just trying to understand where the parents are coming from

They were coming from Nunya. Lol

 

[sb682]

So at what age do they figure it out

It varies. There is no specific age when a child figures out that characters aren't real or Santa doesn't exist.

I have a vivid memory of reading my mom's copy of Parents magazine when I was about 4 1/2. It had caught my eye since I saw "How to talk to your kids about Santa" or something along those lines on the front cover. I read over the parts I understood and then brought her the magazine and asked her what they were thinking; of COURSE Santa, the tooth fairy and the Easter bunny were real! Who would think otherwise?

I finally figured it out when I was 6 or 7, I don't remember exactly when. But by then, I had younger siblings and I could appreciate how fun the illusion is, so I played along for their sakes.

I would never tell a child the characters weren't real! If they believe they're real, let them believe it. They have the rest of their lives to find out things aren't as magical as they seem. My sister slipped and made a comment in front of my 3-year-old a few weeks ago, mentioning her friend used to be Mike Wazowski. I shot daggers at her over his head and asked her how that was even possible and she changed the subject.

 

[tinkerbellandeeyor]

Really, You find it unusual that a 6 year old wouldn't know that they were looking at costumes rather than actual mice, dogs, or whatever?

A 4 year old, maybe but by 6 I'd be worried about my child's development if they didn't recognize costumes. No need to point it out to anyone in the parks but I would expect that they had developed an understanding.

Gearing mor towards the four year old

 

[RIDisneyFan]

The first time we went to Disney out DDs were 6 and 8. They knew Mickey, Minnie, Chip, Dale, etc. were just people in costumes. But they weren't so sure about the princesses! It was so much fun that year when they were still excited about meeting the characters. Now they are 13 and 15 and don't care much about the characters, even though I still love to see them! I would never spoil it for other children, and I make sure my DDs don't say anything when we are in the parks just in case there are any little kids around that still believe.

 

[scrapquitler]

Why would you tell your 4and6 year old that it is a waste to see the characters, that they are just people dressed up and not to bother. Story I witnessed a parent do this a few years ago and gave not gotten over it.

Not everyone believes that the characters are fun. To each his own.

My daughter was scared of the characters when she was 2 or 3(heck, if I was 2 or 3 and confronted with a 7 foot tall rat, I'd be scared too!). By the time we took her to Disney for the first time at age 5, she knew they were people in dressed up and SHE told US that she didn't want to bother standing in line for that. So we didn't do characters. Which was fine with us.

 

[tinkerbellandeeyor]

Not everyone believes that the characters are fun. To each his own.

My daughter was scared of the characters when she was 2 or 3(heck, if I was 2 or 3 and confronted with a 7 foot tall rat, I'd be scared too!). By the time we took her to Disney for the first time at age 5, she knew they were people in dressed up and SHE told US that she didn't want to bother standing in line for that. So we didn't do characters. Which was fine with us.

That understand

 

[lovelygirl1975]

This conversation is so interesting to me. I am not a parent but I do teach 4 & 5 year old children. Their levels of belief in any of this varies. I have some who believe in all of it- Santa, Easter Bunny, etc whole heartedly and will not be swayed. I have others who are more in a unsure mode, and some who don't believe a word of it. So I just play it by ear; but, I do try to protect the ones who believe. I tell the non-believers that I know too and it's our little secret so we just won't mention it. It's funny when I read a book about Santa and the non-believers are giving me this look like "yeah right". While the others are grinning happily. It's always interesting when this kind of talk comes up in the classroom.

 

[squirrel]

And this is why I like taking kids to Disney when they are young. It's so much more fun when they believe.

I'll never forget my niece's face when she saw DL for the first time just before she turned 4. Everything was magical. She thought we were going just for a Mickey Ice cream. After eating it she thought we were leaving to go home.

 

[Mom2six]

My DD6 (almost 7) is ardently clinging to the belief. She came up with her own philosophy about the magic of Disney. Outside of Disney, the characters are just characters in a story. But the magic in Disney World (or Disney Land etc) brings them to life. They get to be real at Disney because of magic. So they are both real and not real. She believes in Santa though and has never once doubted it. Especially since he calls her and remembers if he has seen her at the mall.

My DS5 loved, loved, loved the characters (and still does) last year when he met them. He was 4, characters are his favorite thing in the whole world. He also has autism. He had it figured out real quick - he must have seen the person inside. There he is meeting Mike and Sully, peering in Mike's mouth and then he tries to reach inside and grab the person. Mike's backing away and my son is following, trying to see in his mouth. It was pretty funny. My son still loves to meet them, but I don't think he believes they are real??? He can't tell me so I don't really know.

 

[tjmj9801]

Why would you tell your 4and6 year old that it is a waste to see the characters, that they are just people dressed up and not to bother. Story I witnessed a parent do this a few years ago and gave not gotten over it.

NO WAY!!! Wow!!

That's the reason we keep taking them back while they're so young, so they'll believe in the magic. So very sad for those children. Those are very selfish parents.

Edit: Now that I've read all replies, please don't jump down my throat about different parenting beliefs. I get it. But blatantly stripping the magic because *you* don't want to stand in line is just wrong.

 

[WantToGoNow]

At 4 my Dr announced to an entire row of kids at a egg hunt that the bunny had a zipper up its back. Kids are more observant than you think.

 

[CuteAndFluffy]

At 18 months old, my kid tried to pry off Winnie the Pooh's head to see who was in there.

Some kids truly believe, some kids suspend their disbelief, some kids play along, some kids will point out the Emperor has no clothes.

So if the question is "Why would a parent tell a kid there is a person in there?" the answer can range from because the kid already knows to the parent is OVER the whole costumed character thing.

If the question is "Why would a parent say that loud enough to be overheard?" the answer could range from they were having a personal conversation at a totally appropriate volume that you accidentally eavesdropped on to because they are a particularly jerky kind of jerk. It doesn't sound like they were shouting it from the rooftops, so....

 

[tinkerbellandeeyor]

NO WAY!!! Wow!!

That's the reason we keep taking them back while they're so young, so they'll believe in the magic. So very sad for those children. Those are very selfish parents.

Edit: Now that I've read all replies, please don't jump down my throat about different parenting beliefs. I get it. But blatantly stripping the magic because *you* don't want to stand in line is just wrong.

That is kinda what I was thinking

At 18 months old, my kid tried to pry off Winnie the Pooh's head to see who was in there.

Some kids truly believe, some kids suspend their disbelief, some kids play along, some kids will point out the Emperor has no clothes.

So if the question is "Why would a parent tell a kid there is a person in there?" the answer can range from because the kid already knows to the parent is OVER the whole costumed character thing.

If the question is "Why would a parent say that loud enough to be overheard?" the answer could range from they were having a personal conversation at a totally appropriate volume that you accidentally eavesdropped on to because they are a particularly jerky kind of jerk. It doesn't sound like they were shouting it from the rooftops, so....

No she did not do do this she was at her house I was just visiting

 

[luvmy3]

NO WAY!!! Wow!!

That's the reason we keep taking them back while they're so young, so they'll believe in the magic. So very sad for those children. Those are very selfish parents.

Edit: Now that I've read all replies, please don't jump down my throat about different parenting beliefs. I get it. But blatantly stripping the magic because *you* don't want to stand in line is just wrong.

To be fair not every child needs to think the characters are real to feel the Disney magic. It never occurred to me to let my kids believe that they were real, so if we were discussing whether or not to stand in line to meet Goofy or take that time to stand in line for Haunted Mansion, I'd tell him that standing in line to meet some guy in a dog suit is a waste of time too. Of course my kids enjoy the attractions so they'd agree.
Don't assume that a parent is blatantly stripping away the magic, it may not have been there in the first place

 

[Ceryssa]

To be fair not every child needs to think the characters are real to feel the Disney magic.

This is what I'm hoping! My oldest is 6 (almost 7) and we're taking our first trip next year. I wish we'd been able to take them when they were younger but we weren't able to. She's already asked about whether the characters are "real" and I just don't have it in me to lie to her. Since she'll be 8 by then she wouldn't have probably believed in them anyway, but I feel a little bad about it. I tried to kind of play it off by saying it's ok to pretend they're real, especially at Disney World cause it's a magical place I'm hoping it won't ruin any of her enjoyment of going. Hopefully I'm worrying over nothing!

 

[luvmy3]

This is what I'm hoping! My oldest is 6 (almost 7) and we're taking our first trip next year. I wish we'd been able to take them when they were younger but we weren't able to. She's already asked about whether the characters are "real" and I just don't have it in me to lie to her. Since she'll be 8 by then she wouldn't have probably believed in them anyway, but I feel a little bad about it. I tried to kind of play it off by saying it's ok to pretend they're real, especially at Disney World cause it's a magical place I'm hoping it won't ruin any of her enjoyment of going. Hopefully I'm worrying over nothing!

Don't worry! Look at this way, if we adults can enjoy the magic of Disney, an 8 year old child can and will too!
My youngest will be 9 this trip, he was just under 5 when he went the first time. He knew the characters were just people in suits but he had the time of his life and is so excited to go back. Disney just knows how to make magic for everyone to feel it, whether or not the believe they characters are real or not

 

[cobright]

In the spirit the story was given by the OP, the father was using the information to convey HIS sense of value for the character onto the kids.

The father didn't give a damn about the characters, didn't understand why anyone else would either, and didn't want his kids to buy into it. Kind of a d-bag maneuver really (IMO)

It might mitigate my assessment slightly if I learned that the father was phobic of them, but only slightly. A child's childhood is, by necessity, a parents responsibility. I have issues with crowds in general and irrational people in particular but my daughter loves Alice in Wonderland so I walk through WDW and visit the Mad Hatter whenever possible.

 

[Allison]

In the spirit the story was given by the OP, the father was using the information to convey HIS sense of value for the character onto the kids.

The father didn't give a damn about the characters, didn't understand why anyone else would either, and didn't want his kids to buy into it. Kind of a d-bag maneuver really (IMO)

It might mitigate my assessment slightly if I learned that the father was phobic of them, but only slightly. A child's childhood is, by necessity, a parents responsibility. I have issues with crowds in general and irrational people in particular but my daughter loves Alice in Wonderland so I walk through WDW and visit the Mad Hatter whenever possible.

Story? The post was 2 sentences. Where was a father mentioned? You seem to be adding a lot to the information provided.

My apologies if I missed a post. I'm not seeing where you got this information.

 

[cobright]

Story? The post was 2 sentences. Where was a father mentioned? You seem to be adding a lot to the information provided.

My apologies if I missed a post. I'm not seeing where you got this information.

Here is the original post (some punctuation added to reflect how I read it):

Why do parents do this? Why would you tell your 4 and 6 year old that it is a waste to see the characters, that they are just people dressed up and not to bother? Story; I witnessed a parent do this a few years ago and have not gotten over it.

(bold is mine)

What did I add in my understanding of the OP's story? ... I added that it was a father who did this to his children instead of a generic "parent". I don't know why I assumed it was a father she witnessed doing this a few years ago. Maybe because I am a father myself and made this issue personal.

I'm not sure how attaching gender to the OP's recollection makes my consideration of it any less relevant.

 

[MrsTeddy]

My 4 year old very much believes the magic of Disney. Hethinks the characters are real and I hope he still does when we go back in December for his surprise trip!

Yesterday he told me that next time we go to Disney world we should talk to to tinker belle a out using some pixie dust to help keep him and his sister little since i tell the to stop growing all the time.