WHY did you have kids?

[Kitty 34]

.......because I wanted to be a Mom.

 

[MosMom]

Well, we decided to play TV Repairman one night and the rest is history.

 

[MAC3]

Originally posted by CJK
VERY interesting thread! Thanks for posting. We don't have children and are still very undecided whether we ever will. We have children all around us and while I DO enjoy spending time with them, I enjoy going back to our quiet, orderly home where we can relax and recharge. I hope that doesn't sound too selfish.

Not selfish! Just honest and you're smart enough to realize it. Not everyone was meant to have children.

 

[momof3disneyholics]

Because we felt like there was something missing. We wanted someone to share Christmas mornings, and trips to Disney and the trips to the beach and good cheesy pizzas, and those Bugs Bunny cartoons we both love and how good it feels to jump in a pool on a really hot day and how good it feels to cuddle under a blanket on a cold night. We were just lonely and felt like it was selfish to keep all the good things in life to ourselves.

 

[JVL1018]

It's really not something that I can put into words.
I was married for 7 years before we were ready to have kids and I enjoyed each and every one of them being alone with my husband..but to *me* we were never a family-we were a couple.
Even after we had our daughter, I didn't feel like a family, I felt like a couple with a baby. When we had our son, I felt Ahhh, finally we're all here- my family.
I don't think there is anything odd about not having kids(my brother..and my BIL each have no kids and don't plan on it), but for DH and I--there was never even a question.
I just never in my life imagined NOT being a mother-it would have broken my heart had I not had this opportunity.

 

[siouxi31]

Knowing the consequences of my actions has never been a strong part of who I am. Knowing what I know now, I probably would think much longer and harder about having children.

I had children for two reasons.

1) I thought it was what I was supposed to do.
2) I couldn't live life not knowing the feeling of growing another human being inside of you and giving birth.

Another factor could be because I was adopted. As much as my parents loved me, I grew up always feeling like I didn't belong. After giving birth, it was the strangest thing to see something that was actually a part of me. At 25 years old it was the first time in my life that I felt connected to a human being.

Many of my friends in their late 30's are just now deciding to have children or not to have children. I respect both decisions. It's not for everyone and I'm still not quite sure it was the right decision for me but I am where I am.

 

[alecam]

These two beautiful faces are exactly why I wanted to have kids!!

LOOK AT THESE FACES!!

 

[jimmalru80]

From the first moment I saw my future wife (at age 17), I knew that this was the person I wanted to spend the rest of my life with, and who I wanted to continue that life with. She was #7 of 9 in a family that came out of a storybook. It felt so right, and as I look back on our family, (DS 20, twin DD's 14), I am so thankful that this is the path we have chosen, as we have been truly blessed. We know that our children can go on and make the world a better place, living their lives to the fullest. It brings us great satisfaction and serenity.

 

[Mimi Q]

My husband and I love children and we wanted some of our own.

 

[birdiesunshine]

My DH and I didn't want to be the only two adults without a child at the character breakfasts anymore!
In all honesty, we wanted a child because we wanted a little part of both of us to enjoy and watch grow up. We have one DD 19 months and not sure if we are having anymore. I'm having too much fun watching this one grow up to share her with anyone else. I'm sick of all the people telling us we have to have more children or our DD will feel lonely. To me, that's not a reason to bring a child into the world! Besides the fact, my DH is an only child and doesn't miss having any siblings.

 

[goofygirl]

When I would speak to my mom about the possibility of not having kids, she snapped, "That's very selfish of you."

Oh dear, I've heard that one too. I guess she does not see that some people have children for selfish reasons. In her mind, I suppose all childfree by choice are selfish, and all parents are selfless martyrs.

Yeah, right.

And if you, or I am being selfish, so what? I readily admit that I like "me first", that I like my time and space to myself, that I like doing what I want, when I want to do it, and spending money on me! Who else is going to live my life except for me, and who else knows what's right for me other than me? If I want to live my life putting me first, than color me "selfish, proud and happy!"

 

[dmadman43]

I got tired of mowing the lawn, taking out the garbage, washing the car. Wife got tired of vacuuming, cleaing bathrooms, making beds. So, we had kids to take over the chores.

 

[trishy]

Same as him ^

 

[slo]

We had children to truly make our lives completely fulfilled with love, joy and laughter. To bring a smile to my face every morning when I wake up and to bring a smile to my face every night when I kiss them goodnight. I just can't imagine what life would be like, if we didn't have our adorable DD's here.

 

[Disneyland_emily]

Well my first batch (triplets) were not expected in the least (and were not made out of love) and my hushand had also had a trial by fire approach to his son so one day we wondered why everyone said that having kids was fun so we decided to have a kid who we didnt have to go to court over and DD Nicki was born-

Well then fate gave us the nasty hand and now 6 years later we only have Jake (the others are all angels) and we are in that stage now of do we try again? In someways yes we want to to prove that we can get another kid to kindergarten but in other ways no because how do you move on and continue like the others never existed-Our family will always be broken it can never be complete again-

We've left it up to fate (and the adoption agencies) if we are ment to add to our family so it will be-

-em

 

[Pooh93]

I just always knew I wanted to be a mom. Perhaps, I wanted to see if I could be a better mother than mine was to me, but that's for another thread.

Being a parent is not easy and no one seems to tell you that before you have kids. Having kids is a decision no one should take lightly because it is a LIFETIME commitment and so many people don't seem to get that. However, I like to look at it as the one love affair that is guaranteed to last a lifetime and beyond.

I love watching my dd's grow and change. They are like watching a movie to me. It can go from a drama to a comedy to suspense to an action packed film in a matter of minutes and I'm sure it will be a very long time before I see how it ends.



LOL about having kids to mow the lawn, take out the trash etc. Once my oldest dd was complaining about doing her math flashcards and I told her that was the "one reason I had her was to do math flashcards." However, she didn't see my humor. Poor kid, she's humor challenged.

 

[aprilgail2]

I have always loved kids...as a kid I would babysit for other kids because I loved being around kids. It is so awesome to see everything again through a childs eyes now that I have my own...and heck..I need someone to take care of me when I get old and sick!! I am just kidding about that but I have friends who are childless and the only thing they say they regret about not having kids is that they are worried if they get old and one dies they won't have anyone that cares about what happens to them. I can't imagine me never not having a child, I would feel I missed out on one of the best things in life. I did my own thing and traveled etc until Iwas 35..then decided I wanted more out of life and had my daughter and don't regret it in the least, she is the light of my life.

 

[dvcgirl]

Like many of the posters here, I always thought I'd be a mom. My DH always thought he'd be a Dad. We could fully envision our lives with kids. I think most of us just grow up thinking we'll be parents, get married and have kids. I'm quite sure we would have ended up in the same category if we didn't hit a roadblock. We started trying a year after we were married and encountered fertility issues. I even went through a couple of surgeries to prepare for Invitro Fertilization. We had the IVF appointment scheduled, and then we postponed it. We did this a few times before we both realized that our big urge to have children was fading. We realized that we really enjoyed the freedom in our lives and started to really think about giving that up for the next twenty years or so. Our parents had us when they were younger.....in their mid twenties. We'd be having children in our mid thirties. We knew we'd be close to 60 before our children finished with college/grad school and that for those 25 years our lives would be incredibly different. We decided that it wasn't for us after all. We love children, and "borrow" our nieces, nephews and little cousins if we feel the need to have some kid time. But to be perfectly honest, for us, I don't think life would be nearly as much fun, fulfilling or stress free if we had decided to go down the parenthood path.

 

[JKanownik]

This thread is really interesting. DH and I have been married for 2 years and wont be having kids for at least another 3 years. We are really enjoying married life right now. I am excited to be a mom someday, but right now we just want to enjoy each other.

 

[DISJAZZ]

Because God blessed me with a wonderful wife and a precious child. They are both the gracious answer to a broken and lonely man's prayers.