Who would be comfortable with this?

[BeachGirlFLA]

Absolutely not...you were totally within your rights and I would do the same thing if my husband had any ex-girlfriends (he dated two girls in college but I'm the only woman he's ever been in love with, which I absolutely love )

 

[Magic Mom]

I'm alittle confused with some comments placing all blame on this woman and saying she may be sneaky and up to no good.....it was the op's husband that contacted her. I believe that the husband is encouraging this woman to call and is enjoying the attention. How can he be oblivious? Just not buying that! I'd wonder if he was telling/encouraging her to call. How many times did he call her? I also don't think his response to his wife's feelings were to have this woman stop calling. Instead of backing off and not seeming interested he stated that his wife was uncomfortable with the situation whih leads me to believe they will continue behind her back. It may just be me but I smell something fishy and it isn't just from the old gf!

I don't think the intial call was a big deal, but once he saw that she was being more aggresive than just a friendly catch-up call now and then, he should have told her to back off. That is HIS fault. If he kept accepting the phone calls, he was giving the "old friend" a mixed signal. And he definitely gave her the wrong message when he told her the reason she can't call anymore is because his wife doesn't like it...not because HE thought it was unacceptable.

 

[babyrich]

Honestly my DH is a bit of an idiot when it comes to these things too. I often wonder how the heck he and I got together because when it comes to women, he is totally clueless.

 

[wdwmom0f3]

I don't think the intial call was a big deal, but once he saw that she was being more aggresive than just a friendly catch-up call now and then, he should have told her to back off. That is HIS fault. If he kept accepting the phone calls, he was giving the "old friend" a mixed signal. And he definitely gave her the wrong message when he told her the reason she can't call anymore is because his wife doesn't like it...not because HE thought it was unacceptable.

 

[ForAandA]

I hate to say this OP, but check his cell phone records, emails, and FB. Betcha they have been in contact more than you think.

Hope I am wrong.

 

[Buckalew11]

I'm alittle confused with some comments placing all blame on this woman and saying she may be sneaky and up to no good.....it was the op's husband that contacted her. I believe that the husband is encouraging this woman to call and is enjoying the attention. How can he be oblivious? Just not buying that! I'd wonder if he was telling/encouraging her to call. How many times did he call her? I also don't think his response to his wife's feelings were to have this woman stop calling. Instead of backing off and not seeming interested he stated that his wife was uncomfortable with the situation whih leads me to believe they will continue behind her back. It may just be me but I smell something fishy and it isn't just from the old gf!

Well, I said she may get sneaky because I was being nice.

Actually, I think they'll both get sneaky if they want to continue the talking.

After going through this with my sister and BIL, I feel like I may be analyzing everything more and differently. He, too, told the GF that his wife didn't like their interaction. So, they snuck around. When I comforted him, he said he *had* to sneak so that he did not hurt my sister's feelings. Uh...you're cheating...

Not that the OP's DH is cheating-- but the connection's been made. I'd be on my toes. Just saying.

 

[bumbershoot]

I also agree with Skywalker's comment. He chose his words poorly. Now the wife has been painted the bad guy.

Yes.

 

[StephMK]

I hate to say this OP, but check his cell phone records, emails, and FB. Betcha they have been in contact more than you think.

Hope I am wrong.

I'm sorry but I would tend to agree with this. I'm not a very jealous person but I am naturally suspicious. I can't picture a scenario where it would be necessary to catch up innocently 10 days in a row. FB is easy to chat & send msgs, it doesn't sound like it's stopping, just moving venues.

I know a good friend of mine rekindled an old flame through FB and it led to cell calls & other downward slide activities that resulted in a divorce. Both families found out but one is still married, one divorced. I would never have suspected it if my friend didn't tell me and I know the spouse was trusting until evidence was found.

As much as you trust your DH, keep your eyes open. If someone else is more persistent, things don't always end well.