Who pays for Prom?

[HopperFan]

When DS went, one year with GF and one year with Friend.
GF - He paid for tickets, had family member with antique car drive them there, her folks covered dinner at the club, bought each others flowers
Friend - He paid for dinner, she paid their share of party bus, each bought their own ticket and bought each other flowers

When DD went, with a "BF" kinda like OP situation, she was firm that she could pay her own way.
Each paid for their own ticket, each paid their own way in limo (stretch with group), he paid for dinner (she only had rice ... group picked restaurant), bought each other flowers.


Prom is crazy expensive for one person to pay. OP: If they both want to go together they should each cover their own and split the rest. If he doesn't really want to go with her (and based on what he heard I wouldn't want to) then find a group of people to go together and each pay their fair share.

Well we were going to pay for DS ticket ($75.00 ea) for him and girlfriends (shes a junior) . Not sure when it is but is moot anyway. He asked her to go a couple of weeks ago. She broke up with him this week. Ah well part of life but I feel bad for him. Wife said she hopes he just goes an hangs out with his buddies. I doubt he he will though.

Be glad. Around here they have some nickname for the week after prom (I can't remember). It's when the girls who got their whole thing paid for dump their boyfriends. They only hang in that long to get to go to prom without paying. Sad.

 

[gopack]

My DS asked a friend to their prom. He paid for her ticket. She offered to pay for it but I insisted he (meaning me) pay for her ticket and dinner before the prom. They bought each other the flowers. Their group hung out at her house after the prom and they did not take a limo because they were both nominated for prom king/queen and had to be there super early to get ready for a dance all of the nominees did as a group.He was on the fence about going but had a great time.

My DD’s date paid for her ticket and dinner. I think they each paid a portion of the limo.

 

[luvsJack]

Dd’s Junior year she went with a senior. She was prepared to pay for her ticket but he paid. The mom’s of all the boys in his group paid for the party bus and arranged and paid for a special dinner.

Her Senior year, she asked the boy. She paid for the tickets. He paid for dinner. They took her car and he bought breakfast after prom.

 

[runwad]

Oldest DD was asked by a boy, he bought the tickets, she paid for the majority of her dress, I helped a little. I bought the boys corsage.

Second DD asked a boy, she paid for tickets, she paid for the majority of her dress, I helped a little. I bought the boys corsage.

DS will be a senior next year, we'll see. But if he asks the girl he'll pay for the tickets and buy his own tux (I'm not helping him, it's not as much as the girls dresses, he can handle it) and I'll buy his dates flower.

 

[Summer2018]

Who paid for your or your child's HS Prom? If you have a boy, did he (you) pay for his date's ticket? If you have a girl, did her date pay for her, or did she pay for her own?

DS had a girlfriend for a while that he thought he would ask to Prom; they are still "sort of" dating, but it's kind of fizzled out to the point that she said to a mutual friend that she would "still say yes if he asks me, but I really just want to hang out with my friends while we are there"

OK, that's fine, but now DS doesn't want to ask her/go with her because it is $90 per ticket, $180/couple and he doesn't want to pay that much, plus a tux, limo, etc, for her to go have a playdate with her girlfriends.

I told him to ask her to go but she pays her own ticket. He wasn't sure about that. He also has a couple other girls who he says have been flirting with him lately that he could ask, but he isn't really dating any of them per se, they are all just friends. If he asked one of them, how would that work?

I don't care about the ins and outs of the 17/18 year old dating world, lol, I just want to know how much I should expect to have to shell out for prom this year. He's my oldest. We haven't done this yet!

DD went with her boyfriend at the time who was in college. They split the cost of the tickets. He rented his own tux. His travel agent mother got a deal on the hotel room. We, of course, paid for her very expensive gown, shoes, jewelry, makeup, and hair appointment. He drove his car, so no limo rental. The cost ended up being even for both.

 

[mnrose]

DD has bought her own ticket every year (she's gone three previous years). The first, she went as the "date" of a female friend, and the last two with her boyfriend. They are both students, and their mutual belief is that they should "share" equally in the costs of all their dates. So, they each pay for their own dinners, etc. Tickets for prom here are VERY cheap ($25). She pays for her dress. Boyfriend pays for his tux. They buy each other flowers. It's fair. And, they go in his car. No limo. Ever.

Limos are rare in our district.

 

[Colleen27]

DD is going with friends, not a date, so we're paying for her ticket. I doubt there will be transportation expenses; limos for prom really aren't a thing in her school, especially not for juniors and the kids from "the sticks" (DD is both), so she'll probably just ride with friends. And the ticket includes dinner at the venue, which is known for excellent food, so other than maybe hanging out at B-dubs or Dennys after, there's not really a "spending money" element either.

When she's had dates for formals, she still prefers to pay her own way. Few of her friends/boyfriends work - between the academic and athletic load that is normal at her school, it just isn't something most find practical - so splitting the cost is more comfortable all the way around. And usually it is her expense to pay, but she doesn't work during the school year and is saving last year's summer earnings for her summer exchange trip to Japan, so we're covering the dance tickets this year.

ETA: My son didn't go to his prom so I have never and will never have to navigate this as a parent of a boy.

 

[luvsJack]

Posting again to add, when my sons went to prom they paid for everything except her dress. Or to be exact we paid. Back then tickets were cheap so the biggest expense was their dinner. My oldest and his date and their friends all had a picnic before prom.

 

[AnnaFloridaLover]

In my neck of the woods the girls (parents) pay for their ticket and dress and the boys (parents) pay for their ticket and suit. They buy each other a flower. Transportation can go either way.

Why the heck should I pay for my son's date's ticket/dress etc? Not going to happen unless she was in financial need of course.

 

[eileenjez]

When we graduated it was either go to prom or Grad Night at Disneyland. Not enough money for both. We chose Grad Night. Those days Grad Night was held right after graduation so we went straight from that to Disneyland and spent the night there at the park. We all fell asleep on the bus coming home. I can't believe it's been 50 years. Oh and he paid for it all.

 

[powellrj]

My kids went to their proms with friends. Everyone bought their own tickets, transportation, dinner before and after prom. I bought all their clothes and flowers.

 

[HeatherC]

My daughter had a boyfriend at the time who she had been dating for two years. He would have gladly paid for her ticket, but like you said Prom is expensive and she (we) paid for her ticket. Nowadays, I think it is sooo expensive and not really fair to expect the boy who is probably not making much money to pay for both tickets...especially if they are not dating.

When my son went, he did ask a girl from another school and bought the tickets himself. But she also insisted on later paying him for her ticket because it was a lot of money and she didn't think it was fair for him to have to cover the cost. I was just proud of him for buying them without expecting her to pay.

 

[sk!mom]

Here it is a Jr/Sr prom and underclassmen can only go if taken by a Jr or Sr.

DD21 went three years.

Sophomore year- she was a dating a Jr and, as I recall, he paid for tickets and a dinner out before and after "breakfast." Her least fun year since it was all spent with his friends and she really didn't know them and the relationship ended up not being a good one.

Junior year- She (we) paid for everything and went with her best girlfriends. They ended up spending the prom and after party in a larger group of about 15 long long time friends. Her most fun year.

Senior year- she went with a new friend/boyfriend (they'd only known each other a few months and had been dating a month.) He paid for everything. It was a fun year because they went with mutual friends. She remembers it very fondly though as now 4 years later she and this BF are about to graduate college and move to a new city together. They've somehow stayed together through 4 years at separate colleges.

I guess IMO, whoever asks...pays.

 

[sasywtch]

This was back in the "olden days" of the 70's. Our school had a junior prom and a senior Ball. For some reason, my best friend and I both had long term boyfriends during high school but never during the prom/ball time. I had just broken up when junior prom was coming so wasn't going to go. My best friends brother who had just graduated said that wasn't acceptable and he was taking me. I may have bought his ticket or he did, not sure but he did buy dinner and a corsage. My senior year, I really liked this guy and was told he was going to ask me to the ball. He came over and we sat and talked for 2 hours but he chickened out and asked a family friend instead : ( (we still talk on facebook all these years later but darn him that he chickened out). Anyway, I asked a friend who was our paperboy. He was a year younger, boy of the year for his class, his junior prom king, etc. I can't remember who bought the tickets and if I remember correctly, they weren't a huge cost back then. Like 15 for one or 25 for a couple. He did however drive, buy dinner and a corsage. We were taking another friend who had asked a guy who said yes. When we drove to his house, no one answered the door. He stood her up. So, my friend date also bought her dinner. (she tried hard to pay but he wouldn't hear of it). I know this is going to sound old fashioned but it was assumed the guy was buying dinner and corsage no matter who asked who to the dance.

 

[Poohforyou]

My daughter went to prom with friends but I told her if she was asked by a classmate she should offer to buy her own ticket. In my opinion, unless a couple is really dating seriously everyone should buy their own ticket. If they are dating seriously this should still be a conversation the couple should have. I don't think a teenager should automatically be saddled with the expense of 2 tickets.

 

[Skywalker]

We always figured if it was two people who would both being going anyway (both seniors who would be going regardless) and they are deciding to go together, then everybody pays their own way. But if one person is only going because they were asked (a lower grade or from another school or whatever) then the one whose prom it is would pay for their guest.

As to all the dinners and breakfasts and party busses I don't know because my sons never did any of that lol.

 

[Marchand63]

We paid.

 

[Hikergirl]

In my neck of the woods the girls (parents) pay for their ticket and dress and the boys (parents) pay for their ticket and suit. They buy each other a flower. Transportation can go either way.

Why the heck should I pay for my son's date's ticket/dress etc? Not going to happen unless she was in financial need of course.

I couldn't imagine paying for someone elses choice of attire, especially a prom dress. Those things can cost as much as a wedding dress!

I can see paying for the date's ticket, if it isn't their prom and they were invited, however if they are both in the same class and school then it is "their" prom and they should each pay their way.

 

[CarolAnn856]

I really can't figure out why anyone is even mentioning dresses/tuxes as part of the question. Who the heck would even wonder if a guy should pay for his date's dress, or if a girl should pay for her date's tux? I figured the question related to tickets, dinner, flowers, and transportation, definitely not what they wear.

 

[Wendy31]

Last year, DS asked a girl to the prom, & he (we) paid for his ticket & her ticket to the actual prom. They went to dinner before the prom w/ a group of friends, & he paid for both his & her dinner. We also ordered & paid for her wrist corsage. She (her parents) paid for his boutonniere.

In addition to the prom tickets, my nephew's parents paid for his date's dress, hair appointment, & pedicure/manicure as well.