who has put their kid in a backpack harness?

[lan3]

I used them once with my triplets, one is autistic. They were pulling in three different directions and I didn't care for it. I ended up using the stroller when they were young and I always felt bad that other kids can walk around and they couldn't.
As for the judgments on this board, please do not let it get to you. People here are incredibly rude and not worth your time or energy. There is no reason to compare children with dogs or say parents should be on a leash or that kids shouldn't get to go to Disneyworld if they are runners. There is an appropriate way to give opinions and harsh judgmental ways. As I said, I did not care for the harnesses but I expressed it in a way that did not make others feel awful. It is possible if our intent is to not make others feel awful but I unfortunately think many people on the Dis try to make others feel badly about their parenting. I just don't understand why.

 

[CaliKT]

When my older son was a toddler, he was fast and fearless. He would take off in the direction of something that interested him and wouldn't turn back to keep track of me. When he was 1 and 2, I used a harness backpack with him in crowded places like Disneyland or the zoo. It gave him the freedom to explore that he craved while keeping him safe. I never would have dreamed of using one with my second son. It simply wasn't necessary; he did not bolt off and was always aware of where I was. If my kids hav been born in the opposite order, perhaps I would have judged parents using harnesses harshly and assumed they had not taught their children properly.

(and yes, FWIW, my older son was later diagnosed as being in the autism spectrum.)

 

[mjkacmom]

Totally agree! It actually makes me sad to see

Local 2 year old recently died of cancer here - now, that is sad. A parent I know walked her 5 year old ds (no special needs) in a stroller to kindergarten orientation - not sad, but a little weird.

Personally, I'd rather see a toddler on a leash than forced to be immobile in a stroller for hours on end. I know my active twins, when given a choice, would chose a leash over the dreaded stroller any day.

Not every family has enough adult hands to hold, and not every child wants to keep holding hands (don't blame them).

 

[smitch425]

Local 2 year old recently died of cancer here - now, that is sad. A parent I know walked her 5 year old ds (no special needs) in a stroller to kindergarten orientation - not sad, but a little weird.

Personally, I'd rather see a toddler on a leash than forced to be immobile in a stroller for hours on end. I know my active twins, when given a choice, would chose a leash over the dreaded stroller any day.

Not every family has enough adult hands to hold, and not every child wants to keep holding hands (don't blame them).

I agree with most of this except the bolded, not every child in a stroller is "forced" to be sitting in one. Some kids actually enjoy it.

 

[Hannathy]

Personally, I'd rather see a toddler on a leash than forced to be immobile in a stroller for hours on end.

And many who don't use leashes also don't keep them in strollers all day, or make them hold hands constantly. They can walk without leashes and come home safely. It isn't a one or the other.

 

[harrowgirl]

My son is 3... he is a wild man and loves to run off. Im thinking about getting him a backpack harness for our upcoming trip... my husband thinks its ridiculous and he will just not let him out of his site. any experience with them? i agree they are a little ridiculous but i guess it beats him running of in a crowd.

I have tried them with my son, who is 2 and a runner. He refuses to be held, or hold my hand when walking - so he doesn't get out much unless he can be restrained in the stroller I joke that he is on house arrest.

He hates the harness - he tends to fling himself on the ground and won't walk when wearing it- but we are going to keep working with him because we want to go to Disney in May and with the crowds, I am too worried about him running away and getting lost.

I'd rather be thought of as one of "those" parents with their kid on a leash than be frantic searching for my 2 year old at Disney that ran off and got lost in a crowd, or have a miserable time constantly trying to restrain him/fight him to prevent him from running away.

Safety is my number one concern. I don't care what others think. It isn't fair to punish the rest of the kids (i.e. not travel and do things) because their brother is a hooligan


My daughter, on the other hand, LOVED her Elmo harness and would ask to wear it (though we rarely ever used it)

 

[mjkacmom]

And many who don't use leashes also don't keep them in strollers all day, or make them hold hands constantly. They can walk without leashes and come home safely. It isn't a one or the other.

Not if you have a runner. Ds9 was my only runner, and I admit we lost him ALL OF THE TIME (except WDW). Rocking Horse Ranch, Hershey, cruises, shopping malls, and he would sneak out of the house (we finally got door alarms). Fortunately, he has an amazing sense of direction, and is a great athlete! And a very strong sense of independence.

Dd11 was the opposite, very clingy.

 

[AndreaA]

I always love it on these threads that the only ones who are allowed to have an opinion are the pro leashers.

Guess what the people who hate them are allowed to feel that way, and just because we do doesn't put us on a "soap box" any more than we could tell you to get off your "soap box" And the same could be said to you about walking in someone elses shoes.

We can hate them and you can love them.

I don't understand the bolded part at all. Those who choose to use a leash are asking you to understand the difficulties they might have with their children. To acknowledge that there are real and valid reasons why they use one. What would I learn about leashes if I walked in your shoes? Other than that you hate them? I mean unless the reason you hate them is that you witnessed a tragic accident involving a child on a leash, I really don't see the connection.

For the record, I tried leashes once for my twin boys when they were younger, and they hated them so the trial was a failure. We ended up just keeping them in their stroller more and taking frequent breaks to let them run around. In a big fairground situation with plenty of free space, that was possible. In DW, not so much, so I can see why people would work harder to make a leash work.

 

[aubreysmom09]

DD2 has a leash. She is not big on holding hands. Her leash is a puppy, and most of the time when we get her stroller she cries for puppy. I think it has helped her learn her boundaries. She knows that she can only go so far. Sometimes she wants to hold hands, and we take the leash part off and put it in the puppy.. We also let her walk with out holding on to the leash or her hand. She normally stays within a safe distance. DD likes it, and I'd rather have her wear it than throw a fit because she doesn't want to hold hands. Most of it is because she is very independent, and this helps her feel more that way. Before kids I use to be against them, but now I like it since she likes it.

 

[chimommy]

OP, are you also planning on taking a stroller? Even if you take a backpack leash, I would still recommend a stroller, even if it a simple umbrella stoller. There is a LOT of walking to be done at Disney. Odds are, your little one will not want to walk, much less run, at some point.

yes we are renting a double stroller... I have a 14month old too. I would never think of going to disney with out one. My son is used to walking/running a lot. We live in a city and walk everywhere. He loves to run and usually runs the whole time we are on a long walk through the neighborhood, going to the store ect. So I can't imagine he wont want to out walk at disney. I was just considering the backpack harness... not sure if it will even work for him anyway because he knows how to undo the buckles. He normally is pretty good about staying with us, but he does like to "surprise" me and try and run off... he thinks its a game. I would just hate from him to "surprise" us and not being able to see him. so I was thinking about our options. Thanks for your advice =) I always like to hear what has worked well for other parents.

 

[twinboysmom]

I always love it on these threads that the only ones who are allowed to have an opinion are the pro leashers.

Guess what the people who hate them are allowed to feel that way, and just because we do doesn't put us on a "soap box" any more than we could tell you to get off your "soap box" And the same could be said to you about walking in someone elses shoes.

We can hate them and you can love them.

You are certainly entitled to your opinion but you can also be a little bit empathetic to other's situations and not so judgemental. You don't have to use them (and I know your child is older). You don't have to like them. But when you make suggestions to others there is no reason to be condescending. Most parents who use leashes don't do so because they want to. Sure, there are lazy folks out there who do and there are lots of lazy parents who don't and do not keep up with their kids. But most are like me. They work with their kids and try to teach them the right way to do things, not to run out in traffic and to stay with mommy and daddy when we walk. For most parents, it works well. For others, their kids take a little longer due to immaturity or developmental problems.

When I harness my children (one more than the other) it is because I love them and don't want them ran over by a car or lost. I don't want them running in front of others at WDW and tripping people. It is our absolute last resort. Our therapists are supportive of the harnesses and encourage us to use them as needed so they can learn the rules of the world and not stay locked up in a stroller. And slowly, it is working and I am hopeful that we will not need to use them at all on our trip to WDW in 2.5 weeks. One of my boys for sure will no longer need it. But my children are not the children that can come home safely without being in a stroller, holding a hand constantly, or being harnessed. I am glad that most children are and glad that YOUR child was this type of kid.

 

[chimommy]

I used them once with my triplets, one is autistic. They were pulling in three different directions and I didn't care for it. I ended up using the stroller when they were young and I always felt bad that other kids can walk around and they couldn't.
As for the judgments on this board, please do not let it get to you. People here are incredibly rude and not worth your time or energy. There is no reason to compare children with dogs or say parents should be on a leash or that kids shouldn't get to go to Disneyworld if they are runners. There is an appropriate way to give opinions and harsh judgmental ways. As I said, I did not care for the harnesses but I expressed it in a way that did not make others feel awful. It is possible if our intent is to not make others feel awful but I unfortunately think many people on the Dis try to make others feel badly about their parenting. I just don't understand why.

I think people are always going to judge others "parenting skills"... its the nature of the beast... I never take it to heart. i dont know anyone who has all the right parenting answers =) Thanks for your input! I talked with a couple of my friends who have tried them out before and it sounds like they didnt really work well for them. maybe I will just rent a gps tracker for him =)

 

[Hannathy]

You are certainly entitled to your opinion but you can also be a little bit empathetic to other's situations and not so judgemental. You don't have to use them (and I know your child is older). You don't have to like them. But when you make suggestions to others there is no reason to be condescending. Most parents who use leashes don't do so because they want to. Sure, there are lazy folks out there who do and there are lots of lazy parents who don't and do not keep up with their kids. But most are like me. They work with their kids and try to teach them the right way to do things, not to run out in traffic and to stay with mommy and daddy when we walk. For most parents, it works well. For others, their kids take a little longer due to immaturity or developmental problems.

When I harness my children (one more than the other) it is because I love them and don't want them ran over by a car or lost. I don't want them running in front of others at WDW and tripping people. It is our absolute last resort. Our therapists are supportive of the harnesses and encourage us to use them as needed so they can learn the rules of the world and not stay locked up in a stroller. And slowly, it is working and I am hopeful that we will not need to use them at all on our trip to WDW in 2.5 weeks. One of my boys for sure will no longer need it. But my children are not the children that can come home safely without being in a stroller, holding a hand constantly, or being harnessed. I am glad that most children are and glad that YOUR child was this type of kid.

And the pro leashers need to not announce that they love their children more and unlike those who don't use leashes want to bring their children home safely.

Sorry but it is always the pro leashers who bring out the "we love our children more" lines in these discussions. That isn't being judgmental?

 

[twinboysmom]

And the pro leashers need to not announce that they love their children more and unlike those who don't use leashes want to bring their children home safely.

Sorry but it is always the pro leashers who bring out the "we love our children more" lines in these discussions. That isn't being judgmental?

I don't see anyone saying they love their kids more than any other parent. I (and I will assume the others as well) am saying that I love my children and I do not want them to be lost or injured because they lack the communication skills required to understand not to run away. So no, I don't think this is a judgemental thing to say. I think people who don't leash their child love their kids just as much but fortunately, they have a child who they don't feel they need to harness. I will say it again, if I didn't need to use it, I wouldn't. I think this probably encompasses the thoughts of the vast majority of those who use a harness as well. Now it you can find someone who said that they love their children more than someone who doesn't use a leash, I would agree that it is a judgemental thing to say. I reread the thread and didn't see any post saying that.

 

[disneyfan123]

And the pro leashers need to not announce that they love their children more and unlike those who don't use leashes want to bring their children home safely.

Sorry but it is always the pro leashers who bring out the "we love our children more" lines in these discussions. That isn't being judgmental?

Where did someone say that pro harnesses love their children more?

 

[LazyDaisy]

I am pro-leash... for MY OWN kids. I could care less what other parents do for THEIR kids.

I don't have a need to judge parents walking with kids at their sides and think, dang, they must not love their kids, why aren't they wearing a proper leash??

I think when we talk about bringing OUR kids home safely - we're not generalizing. We're not making passive aggressive hints that YOUR well behaved child will not be arriving home safely with you, so we love ours more. It means that to keep OUR kids safe, we do what we feel is best.

When my son was young, I had the full approval of his therapists to literally lock him in his room at night - because he was a flight risk and left the house by himself in the middle of the night, or would just leave into various parts of the house and do dangerous things. Child gates could not keep him out. If I put that out there just in general, "oh yeah, I lock my kid in his room at night" - omg imagine the responses. Yet we had a full sit down discussion with several therapists who agreed that I had to do what I needed to to keep him safe. I had one mother tell me that I should just not sleep when he was awake. He slept for MAYBE 4 hours in a 24 hour period back then. He also had a little sister who did not always sleep at the same times. When exactly was I supposed to sleep? Instead he was safe in his child-safe room with lots of toys, and if he DID cry I would hear him in a nanosecond. But at least that way he was safe. It's so easy to judge another parent when your child has no issues with abc that theirs is struggling with. My mom could not understand that my son was just, well, harder to parent than I was when I was a kid. And it wasn't due to her superior parenting skills, but because of our personalities. It sometimes just happens that way. Bah.

Now let's all sing kumbaya and group hug.

 

[jessc79]

I might use a harness for convenience and enjoyment for my DS. I don't have to and he does not have special needs. I also yank my huge dog on his leash when he needs it. So I guess I'm worst of all!

 

[disneyfan123]

I am pro-leash... for MY OWN kids. I could care less what other parents do for THEIR kids.

I don't have a need to judge parents walking with kids at their sides and think, dang, they must not love their kids, why aren't they wearing a proper leash??

I think when we talk about bringing OUR kids home safely - we're not generalizing. We're not making passive aggressive hints that YOUR well behaved child will not be arriving home safely with you, so we love ours more. It means that to keep OUR kids safe, we do what we feel is best.

When my son was young, I had the full approval of his therapists to literally lock him in his room at night - because he was a flight risk and left the house by himself in the middle of the night, or would just leave into various parts of the house and do dangerous things. Child gates could not keep him out. If I put that out there just in general, "oh yeah, I lock my kid in his room at night" - omg imagine the responses. Yet we had a full sit down discussion with several therapists who agreed that I had to do what I needed to to keep him safe. I had one mother tell me that I should just not sleep when he was awake. He slept for MAYBE 4 hours in a 24 hour period back then. He also had a little sister who did not always sleep at the same times. When exactly was I supposed to sleep? Instead he was safe in his child-safe room with lots of toys, and if he DID cry I would hear him in a nanosecond. But at least that way he was safe. It's so easy to judge another parent when your child has no issues with abc that theirs is struggling with. My mom could not understand that my son was just, well, harder to parent than I was when I was a kid. And it wasn't due to her superior parenting skills, but because of our personalities. It sometimes just happens that way. Bah.

Now let's all sing kumbaya and group hug.

We have to do the same thing with our 5 year old. Keeps him safe, the pets safe and his sister (who needs way more sleep than him due to medications). I understand.

 

[littlebit0863]

Not if you have a runner. Ds9 was my only runner, and I admit we lost him ALL OF THE TIME (except WDW). Rocking Horse Ranch, Hershey, cruises, shopping malls, and he would sneak out of the house (we finally got door alarms). Fortunately, he has an amazing sense of direction, and is a great athlete! And a very strong sense of independence.

My kid also would constantly sneak out of the house! He could undo a deadbolt and the doorknob lock and walk right out before he was two years old. We also had to get an alarm system, and there is a chime if any door or window opens, in case we forget to set the alarm.

 

[Srbright]

We leashed our daughter at Disney. Call me worst parent of the year bit 6 months prior to our trip to Disney we lost her at the Michigan Renaissance Faire. Fot those that have never been there, imagine 25,000 people is a space a fourth of Epcot. Most of them in garb of some sort. I let go of her had and she was out of my sight for 20 seconds (not just me but also DH and two close friends). We found her 20 minutes and 1/4 of a mile later at the entrance trying to leave.

The weaver gave me a thread and I tied her to me for the rest of the day. Thankfully she is older and thats no longer an issue. But I would rather be safe than sorry.

Stacy