Who do some parents force kids on attractions if they are afraid?

[kaw1218]

Because we're mean!(and they have to have something to tell their therapist )

 

[momof2inPA]

My DSon-in-law forced my 5 yr old grandson to go on The Dinosaur ride in Animal Kingdon. Scared the be-jeebers out of him and refused to go on another ride the rest of the week. That was our first day.....nice, huh.

I forced my five year old to go on Dinosaur on our last trip. He sobbed while I carried him to the ride. When we were done, he made me ride it over and over-- and I did (the line was really short). He also had to be forced to ride Test Track, which he loves, too. He didn't like Splash and Big Thunder Mountains, which his brother talked him into riding. He doesn't like anything with a drop.

 

[deekaypee]

An anecdote: A few years ago, I was waiting in line behind a family of 3 in a relatively long queue for PotC (this was before FastPass, by the way). The child, a boy of about 8, got increasingly anxious, which makes a lot of sense if you think about how the queue--c'mon, a dark dungeon! Dad was pretty assertive in insisting the family stay in line, reminding the child that they'd talked about the attraction and how it wasn't real, that the ride would be fun, and that the family had already waited in line for a long time. Mom was silent in this exchange, from what I remember.

But this information was of no comfort to the child, who had started to cry. It was that near-hysterical, rapid-breathing kind of crying that's really quiet--and to me, pretty scary. He kept saying how dark it was and how he was scared of the dark.

Well, Ms. Buttinsky that I am, I offered the child this little flashlight that I was carrying in my daypack (long story). Before he could take it, Dad firmly but politely refused, saying a flashlight wasn't necessary because Son knows Dad always "has his back" and that Son was a "big boy" who didn't need to cry or carry a flashlight. At this, the child sort of swallowed his tears and buried his face in his father's body. At the time, I was feeling rather judgmental and ungracious towards Dad, feelings I'm now ashamed to admit I harbored.

Once we got on the ride--all of us on the same boat, with me able to watch the whole experience unfold--Dad turned into Uber-Supportive Dad. His arm was around Son for the whole ride, which immediately calmed Son down. (Mom was doing some of this, too, but it really was a father-son moment.) And I could see/hear Dad point out interesting parts of the ride and explaining its story, while Son got more and more interested in PotC. By the time we got to the burning & pillaging scene--which now that I think of it, the ride should gives me issues beyond its "dark-attraction" scariness--Son was fully engaged.

The last time I saw Son, he was in the PotC giftshop, excitedly wielding a plastic sword and begging his parents to go on the ride again. And from this experience I learned that I knew nothing about parenting. (I'm child-free and don't have a lot of sustained interaction with children.) I also silently apologized to Dad and promised myself that, unless I saw something much more egregious or downright abusive, that Ms. Buttinsky wasn't go to interfere with other people's family dynamics again. (Not entirely successfully, I have to admit, but I make a good effort the majority of the time.)

 

[autumnbaby9]

I have had to "force" my DD5 on all the rides at DL and WDW that she is tall enough to go on (she hates doing anything new and would sit at home staring at the tv all day if I didn't make her try other things). After every ride I always got a "can we ride that again?" If after trying a ride she still didn't like it I wouldn't force her on it again but children do have to try new things, even amusment park attractions.

However I don't feel like doing the anxious child game this next trip so I'm being a mean mommy and leaving her at home with Nana while I go enjoy a week at DL by myself .

 

[BurkeTribe]

It's all relative to the moment, but if you have enough kids, odds are you will have to take one crying onto a ride eventually. I personally would never take one kicking and screaming, however.

This past Saturday my son (6) started crying as the rest of us got in line for BTMRR. I told him it was like Goofy's Barnstormer (one of his fav's) but he still was crying. I told him "look, your sister (4) can't wait to ride it!" (she later cried-- when she was told she was too short to ride ExEv). He was still sniffling a little as we climbed in the traincar. After the FIRST little droploop, he yelled out:"I LIKE IT!" and didn't stop laughing for most of the ride

Sunday at MGM, he wouldn't even get out of the stroller for the Tower of Terror. After I rode it alone, I tried to talk him into doing it, but this time his mother wasn't going to ride, so for 10 minutes I offered him rewards ("ride it and get a toy in the shop"). After 10 minutes, we could tell not to push him, and his sister decided she wasn't going to ride if he didn't. Next time we all probably will ride it together, and I am sure he will laugh and yell "I LIKE IT"

Of course on Wednesday he road EE twice, with no struggle to get him in line, when I said it was like BTMRR and Goofy's Barnstormer.

 

[winterman]

Two weeks ago we were at Star Tours. There was a boy about 4 or 5 in the last row who started freaking out as soon as the doors started to close. He was crying and yelling " I want to get off " over and over again. A cast member went over to him and did a wonderful job of trying to calm him done. It didn't work but his dad insisted that they would stay on. The CM told dad that they would be watching and if he waved they would shut the ride down. So after a 10 minute delay we took our tour. The boy continued yelling " I want to get off " thru the whole ride.

DH and I were disgusted. I don't know what Dad was trying to prove. When our son was young he needed some strong encouragement to ride some things but never on a level approaching this boys fear. And if he had we would not have forced him.

 

[tinknme]

We attended MNSSHP on the 5th. We were outside of HM waiting for the doors to open. There was a family of 4 in front of us & the younger girl was crying saying she did not want to go on this ride. The mother was not very nice to the girl & told her she was going to go on it. The father said nothing the whole time. Once the doors opened the girl got really frantic & was crying louder stating that she did not want to go on this ride. We went in ahead of them & before to long here comes the mother dragging(I am not kidding)the little girl into the stretching room. A cm walked over to them & apparently said that they would not let them ride. When we got off the father was standing by the exit with the little girl waiting for his wife & son to get off.

I felt so sorry for this girl & really had to bite my tounge. No ride is worth this type of aggravation for a child. If they are kicking & screaming & you are dragging them to the ride, that should be a clue to not bother with it. I was happy the cm stepped in & helped this little girl out.

 

[Zippa D Doodah]

Does anyone else resort to bribery? DS6 is a pretty fearless little guy; he loves RnRC, all the mountains, Star Tours, etc. He is about to bust a seam he is so excited about rding EE on our upcoming trip. However he usually skips HM and ToT. We don't force him, but do try to coax. DD9 is our precious chicken. She likes Splash Mt, but is mortified about coasters or anything with a drop. But HM is her favorite ride. Go figger .

The bribery part is that I offer to buy them a pin for any new ride (that they previously refused) they do. I tell them I want them to have the pin as a way to remember that they can overcome and sometimes enjoy just about anything in this life. This is how I got DD to ride Splash a couple years ago. Now she adores it.

 

[kvogel11202]

We attended MNSSHP on the 5th. We were outside of HM waiting for the doors to open. There was a family of 4 in front of us & the younger girl was crying saying she did not want to go on this ride. The mother was not very nice to the girl & told her she was going to go on it. The father said nothing the whole time. Once the doors opened the girl got really frantic & was crying louder stating that she did not want to go on this ride. We went in ahead of them & before to long here comes the mother dragging(I am not kidding)the little girl into the stretching room. A cm walked over to them & apparently said that they would not let them ride. When we got off the father was standing by the exit with the little girl waiting for his wife & son to get off.

I felt so sorry for this girl & really had to bite my tounge. No ride is worth this type of aggravation for a child. If they are kicking & screaming & you are dragging them to the ride, that should be a clue to not bother with it. I was happy the cm stepped in & helped this little girl out.

OK, and let me add, if my child was small (under 6 years old) or actually physical fighting me about the ride- we wouldn't do it. I'm not trying to completely freak them out, just make sure they experience stuff!

 

[tinknme]

I hope you do not think my post was aimed towards you or anyone else on this thread. I am sorry if that is the way you took it. I was telling what I saw & how it made me feel for this paticular little girl.

OK, and let me add, if my child was small (under 6 years old) or actually physical fighting me about the ride- we wouldn't do it. I'm not trying to completely freak them out, just make sure they experience stuff!

 

[supersuperwendy]

I'm already trying to prepare mine for our trip in regards to HM! They are 9, 6, & 5. My 5 year old is my hold out. So recently we watched a video of it on youtube...the whole ride. I gave them a play by play! "ok kids...see the paintings getting taller? ok..here the lights go out and everyone looks at the ceiling!!! look, it's a funny joke of someone hanging from the ceiling..ha ha what a joke!" right now they think it's funny...we'll see when we actually get there!

I have them saying the following along with me..."Please drag your wretched bodies to the DEAD center of the room"! all in the sake of preparedness!

 

[sameyeyam]

Yes I'm one of those horrible mothers that forced my child onto a ride he didn't want to go on. He was actually starting to cry. Basically I told him not to worry, sit down and shut up.

He was 6 years old at the time and terrified. Want to know why I did it? Because I really don't think any 6 year old boy should be scared of It's a Small World!!

Well I'm happy to say he survived the entire trip, the song didn't get stuck in his head for the rest of his life and he actually enjoyed the ride. I have no idea why he was terrified of it, what he thought was going to happen. I made him go because there was only a 2 minute wait and I needed to sit down, my feet were tired!

Now this hysteria was coming from a kid that had no problems with Haunted Mansion, Pirates otC, etc... See sometimes Mom does know what's best!

 

[i'dratherbe@wdw]

Yes I'm one of those horrible mothers that forced my child onto a ride he didn't want to go on. He was actually starting to cry. Basically I told him not to worry, sit down and shut up.

He was 6 years old at the time and terrified. Want to know why I did it? Because I really don't think any 6 year old boy should be scared of It's a Small World!!

Well I'm happy to say he survived the entire trip, the song didn't get stuck in his head for the rest of his life and he actually enjoyed the ride. I have no idea why he was terrified of it, what he thought was going to happen. I made him go because there was only a 2 minute wait and I needed to sit down, my feet were tired!

Now this hysteria was coming from a kid that had no problems with Haunted Mansion, Pirates otC, etc... See sometimes Mom does know what's best!

 

[CherCrazy]

Yes I'm one of those horrible mothers that forced my child onto a ride he didn't want to go on. He was actually starting to cry. Basically I told him not to worry, sit down and shut up.

He was 6 years old at the time and terrified. Want to know why I did it? Because I really don't think any 6 year old boy should be scared of It's a Small World!!

Well I'm happy to say he survived the entire trip, the song didn't get stuck in his head for the rest of his life and he actually enjoyed the ride. I have no idea why he was terrified of it, what he thought was going to happen. I made him go because there was only a 2 minute wait and I needed to sit down, my feet were tired!

Now this hysteria was coming from a kid that had no problems with Haunted Mansion, Pirates otC, etc... See sometimes Mom does know what's best!

DB was at WDW and forced his DS to go on some rides. The kid LOVED them. I think most parents know what their kids can handle. And they know the difference between crocodile tears and real ones.

 

[luvthemouse71]

Do I think that parents know their kids well? Undoubtedly. But sometimes, this parental "radar" can get skewered by a parent thinking how much they paid to go to WDW or that they don't want to miss out on the ride themselves. I'm talking specifically about the parents who ridicule their kids in public. I saw quite a few kids having to be carried off of Dinosaur! in complete hysterics and one kid actually barfed all over his mom, he was so upset. Have to say, I was kind of chuckling over that, especially since she was not very nice about him being scared to ride. I see nothing wrong with bribery or persuading in a nice manner, but those parents that belittle the kid need a smack in the head! This is a touchy topic. I just don't think anyone should experience WDW in a state of terror-kills the Magic, you know?

 

[MSSANDRA]

You are right and there is a big difference. Dinosaur seems to be one those rides that for some reason parents want to force their kids on. In addition to knowing your child, you have to know about the rides. Dinosaur is SCARY! We saw a mom not only force a crying child on, but she held his head up during the ride so he had to see what we happening. He was not a little child, maybe 10 or so and I have no clue what had went on before hand BUT It really upset a lot of other people on the ride with us and someone spoke to a CM about it We left so no clue what happened. LOTS of WDW rides are not what you expect them to be. It is so important to get a good guid book before you go and know what you are putting your child on.

 

[kvogel11202]

I hope you do not think my post was aimed towards you or anyone else on this thread. I am sorry if that is the way you took it. I was telling what I saw & how it made me feel for this paticular little girl.

No, no personal offense taken, I was just clarifying that I don't think it's ok to literally DRAG the child kicking and screaming! My 11 year old does tend to be the kid whose cries, and it scared of dark rides, but is OK once we get on! Totally agree with you!

 

[babar41]

When my children were small I forced them to eat their vegetables, brush their teeth, clean their room, do their homework... When we went somewhere like WDW we went to have a good time. If one of my kids did not want to ride a ride, I would ask why. Then try and address the problem. Were they scared? Maybe telling them about the ride, what to expect would help. If not, that's OK. We are there to have fun. Maybe this child just wasn't ready to ride this ride. There were other things to do and enjoy, things this child was ready for!

I'm sorry folks, but the theme that is running through this thread... a parent knows their child and after forcing a child they liked the ride... I just don't understand. Yes, I knew if my child tried the ride their was a good chance they would love it. But NO ride was worth "45 minutes" of crying while waiting to ride just to prove what an all knowing parent I was.

Yes, it is important to encourage children to try new experiences. BUT there is a big difference between encouraging a child and forcing an obviously upset child to ride a ride. And I don't care what ride we are talking about. There are adults on this board that refuse to ride Small World because the dolls scare them.

And, if for no other reason, how about having pity on those around you. The other guest of WDW that are standing in line with you and your obviously frightened child, having to witness the tears and sobs, the repetitive "I don't want to ride". In case you are unaware of this let me tell you, it does not add to the magic.

 

[Teresa Pitman]

Let me just add my two cents to this discussion.

I think one of the things we want to do in raising our children is teach them to listen to their feelings! This is what they will need to rely on in making future decisions. Then if someday in the future, someone asks them or tries to coax them to do something inappropriate (whatever that might be, from another kid offering drugs or criminal activity or a child molester seeking to get them alone), they will feel uncomfortable and know it is okay to respond to that feeling by walking or running away. Or they will avoid getting themselves into danger because they notice the street they usually walk down has burned-out streetlights or a worrying-looking crowd of people or whatever.

We cannot prepare our kids for every possible danger or bad situation. Fortunately, most of us have pretty good built-in "danger detectors" that help protect us - if we listen to them. How often have you gotten into a situation or a relationship that went bad and afterwards thought "you know, I had a gut feeling that this was a bad idea but I ignored it?"

If one of my kids (or grandchildren) is afraid of a ride, he or she doesn't go on the ride. I'm happy to offer more information about the ride, if that would be helpful. But I think it is important to respect the child's expressed fears whenever possible. There are always plenty of other things to do and enjoy at WDW!!

Yes, sometimes (like in a medical situation) we have to insist on something that the child doesn't want to do or is frightened about. But that is NOT the case in Disney World! And you know, next time you go, the child might be ready to tackle that ride and hop right on. I think it gives them a real sense of accomplishment when they've been able to think it over and decide that now they are ready.

Just my thoughts on this.

Teresa

 

[BlindTyldak]

Let me just add my two cents to this discussion.

I think one of the things we want to do in raising our children is teach them to listen to their feelings! This is what they will need to rely on in making future decisions. Then if someday in the future, someone asks them or tries to coax them to do something inappropriate (whatever that might be, from another kid offering drugs or criminal activity or a child molester seeking to get them alone), they will feel uncomfortable and know it is okay to respond to that feeling by walking or running away. Or they will avoid getting themselves into danger because they notice the street they usually walk down has burned-out streetlights or a worrying-looking crowd of people or whatever.

We cannot prepare our kids for every possible danger or bad situation. Fortunately, most of us have pretty good built-in "danger detectors" that help protect us - if we listen to them. How often have you gotten into a situation or a relationship that went bad and afterwards thought "you know, I had a gut feeling that this was a bad idea but I ignored it?"

If one of my kids (or grandchildren) is afraid of a ride, he or she doesn't go on the ride. I'm happy to offer more information about the ride, if that would be helpful. But I think it is important to respect the child's expressed fears whenever possible. There are always plenty of other things to do and enjoy at WDW!!

Yes, sometimes (like in a medical situation) we have to insist on something that the child doesn't want to do or is frightened about. But that is NOT the case in Disney World! And you know, next time you go, the child might be ready to tackle that ride and hop right on. I think it gives them a real sense of accomplishment when they've been able to think it over and decide that now they are ready.

Just my thoughts on this.

Teresa

To an extent. it's also our responsibility as parents to sometimes show them - a little more firmly than they would like - that whether they are ready or not sometimes it's GOOD to do things that you are afraid to do. if mom or dad gives you that little extra "nudge" to do Kali River Rapids, which they know will be a fun and positive experience, a child can get accustomed to saying "I hear this will be good for me, and I'm scared, but let's do it anyway". Yes, being able to talk one's way through things to one's self is a good skill to learn, but it's a skill that young children take a LONG time in gaining (that's something that most people don't pick up past "I don't wanna until mom makes me" until their teens) and one that if parents don't help them get over the hump good and early with positive reward sometimes, will hamper them in life. I know too many adults who won't try new things, like look for a new job, because it makes them uncomfortable as it is.

Me, personally? Did pick up my DD sobbing and bring her onto SE. it was her very first Disney attraction and she didn't understand that although it was pitch black, it was not scary and she could see everything as well as I tried to explain it to her. We went on it 8 times in 4 days after that.

My DH wants us to ride IASW this trip, and my DD and I have discussed it, and we both plan on crying and screaing in line to try to get out of it.