Where have all the manners gone.....

[SplashLover93]

LynTh i know what you mean we went to a rally and were going to leave now my dad wasn't with us so it was me my mom and my bro and my mom had to carry my bro and all these people were pushin to get to the bus the police were pushin em back lets say it wasn't nice and my poor mom was tryin not to lose me so these people got in a line and hel people back for us when a girl next to us fainted and people were still getting in front of us and the poor girl was out and no one would move finally more people made a line to hold others back and we went into the bus no problem we were so happy because it was 90 degrees and we thanked the people many times before we got on i even got yelled a shut up because i was yelling for the people to move so the husband to get through with his passed out wife i think that dday was on ill never forget its funny when its hot and crowded how rude people get

 

[metta4]

I don't think anyone should have to give up their seat on any WDW transportation. It wouldn't even occur to me that those who got on the bus FIRST should offer me a seat, pregnant or not. You wouldn't expect someone to offer you their spot on SM if they got in the queue first...

I've been to WDW pregnant, and with a high risk pregnancy, and I just didn't feel more entitled to a seat than those who had been right beside me in the parks all day...

I guess I don't understand why this issue continues to irk people.

I think its common courtesy to give your seat to someone who may need it more then you (eldery, pg, person wih small child, etc). If you are able bodied and in good health then I thinkyou should do the poliet thing and offer your seat. I am pretty sure I recall seeing postings in the buses and monorails about giving seats to those who may need them and have special needs.....

JMHO......

 

[Adrienne]

the problem that i have is that i would love to be able to give up my seat for ppl, and i look completely able bodied, but i have chronic fatigue syndrome and walking around the pk and waiting in lines are hard enough without giving up my seat on bus/mono etc. I'm sure that at times there are a lot of ppl who think i'm just lazy/ignorant /rude etc cause i am young (25) and not giving up my seat...

grr sometimes i wish that i had a visible disability instead of a invisible disability.... maybe i should wear a sign around my neck LOL

Adrienne

 

[LuluLovesDisney]

Adrienne, I agree with you about the invisible disabilities. No one can see that you are not able to give up your seat. However, I know most people that are frustrated with this take that into account.

I don't get angry at particular individuals who do not give up their seat, because I have no idea of their capabilities unless they make it obvious to me. You bring up a good point, which is don't assume someone is able bodied and should give up their seat, which is true. No one *should* have to give up their seat. It's more of the idea of the situation in general- that 25 or so people are sitting and law of averages means that there are most likely quite a large percentage of able bodied, healthy people who just don't care. My thoughts usually are "I can't believe no one will offer a seat!"

The only times that specific people bother me with this is when someone places a small (say under 2) child in his/her own seat and not on a lap when many people who could use that seat are standing. I actually saw one child crying "Mommy I want to sit on your lap!" in a situation like this. She turned red, said "no" and hid her face in a travel guide the rest of the ride. It also bothers me when preteen to teenagers "play" or horse around on a crowded bus, knocking into people. Not only have they not offered a seat, while older or less able people are surrounding them, but now they are *accidentally* banging into those people. One situation, my mother kept having her hip banged into by these boys horsing around. My mother was very overweight (has since lost 125 lbs) at that time and she was so embarrassed, angry and exhausted from standing she just cried when we got off.

People do not realize how their actions really do impact others. When I was at Disney when I was younger I always wanted a seat. I hated standing. Now, as an adult, I have the mindset that I *will* be standing. If it's empty and I get a seat = *bonus* That has helped me to enjoy the bus rides a lot more. Maybe if I hadn't grown up seeing the way my mom was treated in various situations, I wouldn't be so sensitive to issues of inconsideration. I think without her as a mother, I would have been more selfish than I am.

I also have to say reading this board is an excellent way to get advice on proper etiquette, for any level of abilities.

 

[taximomfor4]

I totally agree with you, no flames here! I really must say that 99% of the time people were courteous, but, when people were bad, boy they were bad! I had a couple of disturbing situations. The first that comes to mind was one night staking out a spot for Spectromagic. We sat there in our spot 2 hours early. When about 30 minutes before the start, this woman shows up, and starts squishing us all! I know this happens, I understand, everyone wants to see the parade, but this woman was so pushy! She kept saying "my grandchildren need to see the show, can't everyone make some space"! And to add insult to injury she kept shoving my kids into each other! I finally had to tell her to calm down, and that her grandchildren were no more important than my children who had been patiently waiting for almost two hours, and whose parents had to foresight to get a spot early. Needless to say, she wasn't too pleased, but jeez was she kidding or what? I had to deal with her grumbling the rest of the time. Another thing too, so many people just do not feel the need to give up their seats on the buses/monorail. I mean I was brought up and so was my husband to give your seat up to anyone that needs it more than yourself. I juggled holding my daughter on one arm, and keeping my other daughter from falling to the ground, while able bodied people just watched. Meanwhile my husband gave up his seat continually.

We got into the habit of giving up our seats on the way to the park, and waiting for SEAT room on buses or monorails after the parks. Might be considered rude by some people, but if we chose to park our doopahs on the ground and wait for the second or even third bus, so we could sit, we did that. And sat, except dh who is a perfectly healthy young man. The kids, I wanted in seats. Some of our bus drivers were CRAZY -- sitting in seats AND holding on, the kids were nearly thrown more than once. This, however, certainly is not EVERYONE on every bus! But if I felt that we really needed seats, we waited extra. Then we got seats.

 

[LuluLovesDisney]

if we chose to park our doopahs on the ground and wait for the second or even third bus, so we could sit, we did that.

Tell me you're Polish, too! I don't think I've seen that word on a thread yet!

 

[taximomfor4]

The only times that specific people bother me with this is when someone places a small (say under 2) child in his/her own seat and not on a lap when many people who could use that seat are standing. I actually saw one child crying "Mommy I want to sit on your lap!" in a situation like this. She turned red, said "no" and hid her face in a travel guide the rest of the ride.
QUOTE]


My 2yo sits in her own seat, holding onto a bar, with me keeping an arm in front of her holding onto the bar also. I am not being rude, it is how we figured out she seems the most steady. That way my other arm is free to help one of my other young children if necessary (sharp turns, etc). Yes, we were glared at. Massively. We got lots of not-so-whispered insults aimed our way. Nobody knows us, what our needs really are, and why we are seating ourselves how we are. Just putting it out there that being rude and inconsiderate comes from BOTH sides...the sitters and the standers.

 

[taximomfor4]

Tell me you're Polish, too! I don't think I've seen that word on a thread yet!

LOL...not polish, Irish and Slovenian. But my ex had a Polish side to his family. My oldest dd's nickname was Doopie when she was tiny,playing on the word Doopah.

About the whole rudeness thing, its definitely NOT just at WDW! And I have to wonder how much of it is cultural. Not much of it, but surely some??

We were jsut in Niagara Falls, and the shoving and pushing was truly awful. I saw a man pushing an older woman in a wheelchair to the bus stop. As the bus approached, people swarmed the curb...spread out their families to take up the whole curb front. We waited until another bus, but when we left, the man and wheelchair-bound woman were under a tree in the shade, waiting for yet another bus. MOST of the people on the first 2 buses came well after those people, they just pushed onto the buses anyway.

RUDE!

 

[Duckfan-in-Chicago]

I guess my wife and I treat people how we would like to be treated, and yet at the same time, don't expect other people to treat us that way so act accordingly. We wouldn't expect anyone on a crowded bus to offer my wife a seat when she was pregnant so we didn't put ourselves in those situations in her later months. We would give up our seats to a pregnant woman or to someone older or injured, though. My son will be on our laps if someone else needs a seat until he's old enough to stand. Then he'll only be in a seat if the place is empty or he's still kinda young and exhausted.

I find it interesting that some people on this thread talk about men giving their seats up for women like the good old days. I think men deferring seats to women came from a time when women were thought to be inferior/weaker than men, just like giving up a seat to an elderly man. I only have a son right now, but I have plenty of neices who play baseball, soccer and do other very physical stuff. If I ever did have a daughter I don't know how I could justify my son giving up his seat to his sister and then saying that they're both equals.

 

[Tinkerbellmom33]

Disneyjunkie, I think you missed the part where I said we did wait for other buses, but how long should we wait? Someone else pointed out we're with tired children and sometimes you can't wait for that next bus. Maybe the other person you dealt with waited and couldn't wait anymore.
Why bother giving up the seat and then fake a smile and be annoyed. Do it and feel good about it or don't bother doing it at all. It's not the other persons fault you feel your son was put out.
I wouldn't expect anyone to do it for me, but if they did in that situation I think it would be really nice of them. I think it's just common courtesy to do something nice for someone else. I don't think the OP expected special treatment, she was just making an observation. Random acts of kindess put everyone in a good mood!

 

[TinkABoutIt]

I juggled holding my daughter on one arm, and keeping my other daughter from falling to the ground, while able bodied people just watched. Meanwhile my husband gave up his seat continually.

Same thing with me on the bus from Coronado to the parks......

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Well said TInkerbellMOm33!

 

[lillygator]

I have been to WDW MANY times while pregnant = by my own choice....and have encountered many rude folks along the way.....I would NEVER expect anyone to give up a seat simply because that is not how the world works today....everyone doesn't have manners and I understand that and would not expect - we are all paying the same to be there/ride this...etc.....

 

[lillygator]

We visited WDW June 5-10 with our 2 year old and 1 year old. We got so many dirty looks from people every time we went to sit down for dinner. My girls were actually being pretty good considering their ages. One woman actually had the nerve to say to me at MK "I don't mean to sound rude but your kids are awfully young to be here ". I couldn't believe that she would say something.

Now I would have said - ummmmm you'reawfully OLD/UGLY/RUDE to be here...........










SOME PEOPLE ARE JUST *****!!

We have taken D #1 to WDW and CG since she was a little over a year and she has been the best behaved in the restaurant at most times...I am now at the point where I am SICK of being NICE and ACCOMODATING to others....this is MY family,MY vacation and WE ARE GOING TO ENJOY IT whether you run me down, give me dirty looks, cut in front of me in line or whatever cuz now I am GOING TO KICK YOUR A## and fight BACK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I am so sick of the rude visitors.....list goes beyond WDW - we live at the beach in Sarasota and there are tons of RUDE tourists here....it is awful....I realize not many people want to visit Podunk, Wherever, but once you get to my neck of the woods you better be nice, cuz I am sick of you treating my fellow workers, neighbors, associates like CRAP!

 

[TNKBELL]

We visited WDW June 5-10 with our 2 year old and 1 year old. We got so many dirty looks from people every time we went to sit down for dinner. My girls were actually being pretty good considering their ages. One woman actually had the nerve to say to me at MK "I don't mean to sound rude but your kids are awfully young to be here ". I couldn't believe that she would say something. We are at the MK. It is for kids. I had already seen many newborns and she was complaining to me about my toddlers who were sitting in their strollers eating their snacks while my husband rode Splash mountain. I just don't get it.

On a positve note, we were at MGM at the Soarin show when just as we were leaving it broke out into a huge rainstorm. I didn't have a poncho and ofcourse I was wearing a white tshirt. Well this 10 year old boy came running up to me and said "Maam here you go, please take this" It was so sweet. I probally gave him too much of a show and it scared him so there are still some nice people at WDW

I had to share a similar story, Dh & I took the train to DL in 2002 and so many people would say I can't believe you are taking 3 children on the train like this!(now we have 4!) When we went to eat in the dining car, so many people were staring and whispering and the waiter seemed very upset, and when I asked what kind of maccaroni and cheese was on the kid's menu, (apparently a very blue collar question, but my children have discriminating taste, the cheaper the brand the better and they absolutely hate fancy "gourmet" restaraunt kind) he just huffed, rolled his eyes and snottily said "Kraft". However after the meal, the snobby waiter said that he couldn't believe how well-behaved the children were and how neat we had left the table and seemed very apologetic for assuming that we were going to wreck the place.(or maybe he realized that in order to get a tip you must be somewhat cival) Sometimes people just assume that if you have kids you are going to be leaving messes in your wake, but when you don't they seem surprised. I have always loved kids and the look on the face of even a very young child is priceless and nobody had a better time at WDW last year than our 11 month old!!

 

[daisy_77]

Some people have no manners. The filter between their mouths and brains is defective.
They are NOT HAPPY people and they try to make others miserable-just like they are! I say take your little ones, Disney is for everyone! I am taking my little girl next year for her 2nd birthday and I can't wait. Cranky people: bring it on!

 

[pms122765]

People are like that all over the world. I would hate to be in WDW during thw summer & have to deal with the crowds & heat. I have a feeling I might snap at someone after a long, hot day.

What I do not like is the baby strollers that hit your ankels more than twice. I myself have had my kids at WDW many times in strollers & cannot remember ever hitting someone in the back of the leg, besides my wife. You can tell when you have hit something.

Better luck next time.

 

[Mouse House Mama]

Thank you to all the wonderful people who understand what I was originally saying. To the others, let me clarify. I DO NOT expect people to give up their seat for me- BUT- maybe this is old fashioned and not very equal rightsish- I do think that common courtesy among people is not too much to be expected. I NEVER wait for a bus/monorail/boat thinking I will have a seat because someone will be nice enough to stand for me- BUT- when there are 5 adults spread out on seats as well as a bunch of teenagers and noboody can even move over that annoys the hell out of me! That is right up there with the idiots who see me and then start a conversation with me asking how far along I am and how can I take the heat! Now if you don't want to have what I call manners then fine- but if you think I want to listen to you tell me how you don't know how I can stand another minute while you put your feet up you are wrong. I am all for people who have a problem- visible or not that need a seat, but I highly doubt that 50/50 people all have some sort of ailment. When we went last year my ds was 2.5 and dd was 8 months old. We were trying to come back from the boardwalk one night and had to wait an hour for even one bus to come. We had no choice but to take that bus as there was no way we could wait another hour. We knew we'd have to stand and so be it. Here's what annoyed me- this woman and her friend (not elderly mind you) were sitting and had the nerve to tell me - "oh you better hold on to those kids!" Yeah thanks! Then she thought they were so cute and kept trying to talk to me and them. Let me just say this also- there was a wonderful group of young girls who were at a Bath and Body Works convention that week that were on the bus. They hepled me immensely and said out loud that it was disgusting that nobody would give up their seat for a mother trying to juggle 2 small children. They were the sweetest girls ever and I will always remember how nice they were. On the other end of this at the first stop 2 people got off and I quickly ushered my son and daughter with me in the seat when I saw an elderly couple board the bus who definelty needed those seats. The woman looked as if she was about to cry and I knew there was no way that she would be able to stand. So I quickly offered our seats. I had to explain to ds that it was the right thing to do and that was it. No other person moved. I am sorry if you think you are entitled to a seat because you paid for your vaction too, but I am talking about courtesy for a fellow person. It has nothing to do with vacation as I experience this type of rudeness every day. I try my best to be kind and to teach my kids to be the same way. I do not understand what it takes to be nice to someone else. You never know when you might need someone to be nice to you. So while you may not agree with me, that's fine- I just think you are missing my point. I expect nothing- but wouldn't it be nice to be surrounded by happiness?

 

[taximomfor4]

People are like that all over the world. I would hate to be in WDW during thw summer & have to deal with the crowds & heat. I have a feeling I might snap at someone after a long, hot day.

What I do not like is the baby strollers that hit your ankels more than twice. I myself have had my kids at WDW many times in strollers & cannot remember ever hitting someone in the back of the leg, besides my wife. You can tell when you have hit something.

Better luck next time.

I LOVE being the devils advocate, I get to throw this out there. I have hit people in the ankle exactly 3x at WDW. Once was my dh who stopped short in front of me, and twice it was idiots. I was not the rude one for hitting them, they were rude for trying to cut across the front corner of our stroller. When I am pushing the stroller at WDW on a busy day, I really hate when people try to herd me right off the walkway. I will aim straight ahead and walk, and entire large groups start swelling into the tiny space next to me till they eventually have me slanting right off the sidewalk. It gets old. Next time we are there, our plan is to aim straight ahead on the walkway and then have tunnelvision as we walk. Anyone who squeezes next to us and tries to drive us off the path are going to be kissing the side of the stroller their entire walk. GOnna NOT get pushed off the path anymore.

One of those idiots, by the way, was a VERY tall man who was apparently wanting to meet up with his family/friends/acquaintances clear across the walkway in AK. He jumped the front corner of our stroller (while we were walking), and completely flattened my 5yo ds who was walking alongside holding onto the stroller side. The entire crowd kept swelling past, stepping over DS who was lying on the pavement. The man looked back, said "oops" and then met up with his group. My son ended up being carried to First Aid, with blood running down his knee and leg. First Aid cleaned him up, put a big bandage on his knee, gave him a sticker, and then within about 45 minutes we were back at that area again. Guess who was over there, at the same place, with his group, all eating ice cream. THAT GUY. Wanted to go knock him down. He could have at least said sorry, or better yet, checked to make sure DS was ok.

So the warning here is, sometimes if you cut off a stroller, you WILL get hit. And it won't necessarily be the fault of the stroller-pusher!!

Beth

 

[Deafmedic]

I hate to admit it but I am truly shocked at the amount of rude people. Even with hot, humid weather and massive crowds, we should still be civil to one another. Especially towards children which WDW/DL is geared towards.
We always give up our seats to elderly people, pregnant women and parents who have to hold small children.
I've never had anyone to start anything with me. Being 6'4" and 220# and my dw is 5'5" and 118#, people think they can start something with my dw until they see me standing besides her. We are both in professions where we have to deal with stressed out people and are used to recieving threats.
As far as people who knock over strollers or run over feet or ankles with wheelchairs, we have no qualms about running them down and dragging them back to make them apologize to our children or us.
I'm sorry to sound like a total @$$hole but we are raised to believe in common courtesy and we expect the same from others.