Where do I find a guy?

[monkey68]

I'm just wondering, where do I find a decent Jewish guy around here that isn't a total flake and isn't intimidated by a smart girl? Because I'm starting to believe they don't exist. I've tried not looking, I've tried dating websites, I've tried the getting set up thing, and I'm starting to get all disheartened. I did think maybe I'm being too picky, but is it wrong to want a guy that I can have a conversation with and am at least mildly attracted to and treats me well? I really don't think it's that much to ask for. I'm not looking for Mr. Gorgeous, just someone who looks normal with a good personality and with some idea of what respect means.

Hmmm... anyone on here know of some tall Jewish guy in their 20's who is looking for a relationship with a smart, pretty, funny girl?

 

[LoraJ]

Where do you live?

 

[Breezy_Carol]

DD was dating a nice 23 year old Jewish guy she met in college. Unfortunately she is a nice Methodist girl. It didn't work out so he is available in Maryland.

 

[java]

Yes where do you live? NYC is full of Jewish men. Cute funny ones too! The ones I know are older though so I'm no help. Did you try Jdate.com? one friend of mine found "romance" on there.

Oh and a diser set up a dating site someplace. I don't know their religious backround but at least you'll have disney in common!

 

[Caradana]

Where are you from? Hmm. I miss "the chase" from my single days. I've probably romanticized it in my mind but the pursuit and the catch were SO MUCH FUN. Let's talk strategy for you.

 

[aristocatz]

Jdate.com

 

[monkey68]

I've tried jdate, and I'm so fed up with the guys on there. I am 24, and yet I keep getting messages from fat, balding 40 somethings. Nothing against people with large age gaps, but it's not for me. Or you find the guys who flat out insult you, one guy told me he doesn't think women should be doctors. It says it straight out in ym profile that I'm in medical school, why message someone just to criticize them? And the countless dates that lead to nothing always drive me crazy. You go on what seems like this great date, and then he never calls you, and if you try to call him, he ignores you.

I have a few friends that tell me I should get over the "religion thing" and then I'll have a wider selection of guys to choose from, but it's something important to me, and not something I'm willing to compromise on. I think I'm just getting tired of dating, or at least constantly going on dates with different people. Whatever, I'm just venting about the sad state of my love life right now. C'est la vie.

 

[Cheshire Figment]

Check out www.disdates.com . I'm listed there and qualify for your requirements other than age; I'm probably way out of your interest (but I am not balding).

 

[LoraJ]

I've tried jdate, and I'm so fed up with the guys on there. I am 24, and yet I keep getting messages from fat, balding 40 somethings. Nothing against people with large age gaps, but it's not for me. Or you find the guys who flat out insult you, one guy told me he doesn't think women should be doctors. It says it straight out in ym profile that I'm in medical school, why message someone just to criticize them? And the countless dates that lead to nothing always drive me crazy. You go on what seems like this great date, and then he never calls you, and if you try to call him, he ignores you.

I have a few friends that tell me I should get over the "religion thing" and then I'll have a wider selection of guys to choose from, but it's something important to me, and not something I'm willing to compromise on. I think I'm just getting tired of dating, or at least constantly going on dates with different people. Whatever, I'm just venting about the sad state of my love life right now. C'est la vie.

This is why I am curious as to where you live. I was living in NYC when I was your age. I could not find the right guy at all. And most guys around my age did not want to settle. They wanted to party and have fun. I was a bit pickier at that age as well. I probably let some good guys slip by.

You're still very young. Just relax and enjoy this time in your life.

 

[mpls_mm]

I joined a singles group at the JCC and that was way better than J-Date. I even recognized quite a few guys from the site there. They organized speed dating and all kinds of great things. They had a fantastic disco party on Xmas and I would meet a lot of guys who would come from all over. I eventually moved to an predominately Jewish neighborhood and dated some great guys, it was just too hard to meet observant guys without living in a Orthodox area. I have found that Jewish guys aren't as particular about dating inside their religion so they get more to choose from. I eventually met a nice Catholic boy and we sent the kids to Hebrew school.

 

[Mom21]

If you live in S FL, I have one for you. He will be 30 next week though if that is too big of an age gap. All he wants is a nice Jewish girl that wants to settle down and have a kid or two. Oh yeah you have to be "hot". Oh how I love him. Really nice guy and he works (thats hard to find these days), and he loves intelligent women.

 

[Uuaww]

I fit your requirements pretty well except for the Jewish part. Probably too far away though due to my unique location. HA

 

[Caradana]

A solid percentage of my girlfriends who are doctors (5 of my close friends in college all headed off to medical school) actually met their husbands/boyfriends through alumni events AFTER we graduated - they hadn't known them at all, or hadn't known them well, in school. If you aren't involved in your university's/graduate school's alumni stuff, sign up! Typically ours does a lot of happy hours and charity projects. It doesn't have to be a huge time commitment.

 

[monkey68]

This is why I am curious as to where you live. I was living in NYC when I was your age. I could not find the right guy at all. And most guys around my age did not want to settle. They wanted to party and have fun. I was a bit pickier at that age as well. I probably let some good guys slip by.

You're still very young. Just relax and enjoy this time in your life.

Sorry, I must have missed the first time you ask. I do live in NY. Maybe it's a NYC thing? I have no clue. And it's not so much that I'm looking to settle down and start a family, it's more that I just am tired of playing the game, tired of waiting to see if someone will call back, tired of constantly making first date small talk.

 

[dakcp2001]

When I first bought my home, I was doing a lot of painting and fixing up, I met a lot of nice guys (as ridiculous as this sounds) at Home Depot and Lowes. I think it was mostly because of my confused look when wandering around looking for things, but a lot of guys would approach and help me, and then once you get talking....lol. But had a BF so all those cuties went to waste. (had my own cutie at home, sadly he is just as home improvment challenged as I am)

Most of them were very handy as well, which I think would be nice. I set one of them up with my best friend, they are still together. He also still helps me at home depot.

I would suggest trying to find a good cause you really love and do some volunteering. Then you will meet people with the same interests as you. We meet a lot of wonderful people volunteering.

http://www.singlevolunteers.org/

 

[freckles and boo]

Sorry, I must have missed the first time you ask. I do live in NY. Maybe it's a NYC thing? I have no clue. And it's not so much that I'm looking to settle down and start a family, it's more that I just am tired of playing the game, tired of waiting to see if someone will call back, tired of constantly making first date small talk.

If you really aren't looking to settle down and start a family then maybe your friends are right. You could be missing the opportunity to meet some really great guys because of your religious criteria. I knew of several Jewish/Catholic couples who dated in college. At least two pairs were still going strong at graduation. I would understand if you were freaking out because the baby fever was hitting, but you claim you aren't.

 

[Shelton123]

I fit your requirements But I'm 14, and kinda taken, so... :/

I agree, most of us are flakes

 

[Disney Doll]

Volunteer for a cause you really believe in and you'll meet like-minded people. Since religion is important to you, perhaps consider finding a cause that is more "Jewish specific"...ie-Tay Sachs disease, Holocaust remembrance.

Your local Jewish Community Center.

A different synagogue? When I was younger, we used to go to the Portestant young adults group once in a while...different group of people kind of opened up your horizons a little. In your case, since the man being Jewish is important to you, consider a different synagogue...you'd be the "new girl" & would generate some interest.

Make sure your friends know you are looking and what you are looking for. Tell them specifically to keep their eyes open at their places of employment and during their leisure activities for men who might be appropriate for you. This widens your "network".

 

[SydSim]

I see that your faith is important to you, as is mine. When I was single, I prayed for a nice, single, working Christian guy to love. I got a lot of jerks, one after the other. I wondered why and came to realize that the common denominator was me! I then changed my prayer and asked God to change ME so that I would attract the type of man that HE thought I should have.

Soon after, i started dating my husband and have been happily married for over 15 years.

Oh, btw, he's Buddhist!

 

[Tweevil]

Try being a 30 something non denominational single mom who is fluffy.... those dating sites are nothing but self imposed punishment.... ask me I know

I wish you good luck, it sounds like you would be a real catch to whomever is lucky enough to connect to you.