When to tell the children We are going to Disney

[Brenda Kim]

My friend needs help, she is planning a trip for her newly adopted foster children aged 11 and 13 to Disney this fall. Since I am the resident Disney expert I have been helping her plan the trip however I need your assistance on one thing. When should she tell the kids about the trip, should she tell them now, 30 days prior or last minute. Please let me know how and when you told your children and how they reacted.

 

[pigletgirl]

I would tell them now. 30 days isn't too terribly long and they could get excited for what is to come!

 

[Mousemommy1]

We have only surprised our kids once, when they were 4 and 6. All other times they have known in advance. We have AP's so they
always know another trip is "around the corner". I like to let the excitement build.

 

[JustCallMeMommy]

At that age, I would let them know sooner rather than later so that they could participate in the planning.

 

[Pesky]

I would tell them now. Given their ages and with what they might have been through, best to allow some adjustment time. Plus, as pp pointed out, they can help with planning and what they do and don't want to see.

 

[Brenda Kim]

Thank you all I really appreciate your responses. I love the helping them plan where they want to go and what they want to do.

 

[Thing 1]

I think "newly adopted" is the key. If they have been in this family as foster children for a long time, and are typical children, I would tell them now or very soon. If they have not been in the family long, and are still having huge adjustments to make, I would wait a bit longer. If they are not typical in function, I would take that into consideration. If changes are difficult for them, I would avoid telling them around the time school starts, especially if new schools are involved. For typical children that have been living in the home for a long time, planning is half the fun and I would fully include them from the start.

 

[andiraye]

I would avoid a surprise trip, especially for newly adopted kids. I told my Disney loving, Disney experienced non-adopted son about our trip and he got upset instead of happy. I admit I don't know much about adoption, but I would think the early stages of adopting older kids involves a lot of trust building and that even what the grownups view as a happy surprise can shake a fragile sense of security. Plus with all Tweens and teens it is a good idea to get input on what they want to do.

All that being said, what a lovely, lovely thing for this family to do, and what a wonderful way to start off a new life as a family!