what's the usual etiquette

[luvmyfam444]

when you have to cancel a baby shower - the day before??

The mom to be went to the dr today & they won't let her travel 6 hrs down for tomorrows shower.

Should we still have it since every one has bought their gifts & have planned to be there (and the food is made...)

OR do we just reschedule it for after baby's old enought to travel in Jan or so?

 

[lulugirl]

I would still have it! Why waste the food?
I would videotape it and call the mom while all the guests are there.
Is there someone who can transport all her gifts to her?

 

[mrsltg]

If the Mom-to-be can't attend I would cancel it. People will understand. Conversely, can a couple of people take the food and some gifts to the mom at her home?

 

[pearlieq]

Can the shower come to her? I know not everyone could make it, but I bed you'd be surprised at the people who would!

 

[BevS97]

I would go for some people visiting the mum - she will probably be feeling down about not being able to attend, so if some guests could travel up to see her that would probably be a boost.

 

[luvmyfam444]

Nope doubt anyone could travel the 6 hours to visit her..and having guests wouldn't be good for her it would cause her blood pressure to go up even more from the stress I'm sure... actaully they are still contemplating putting her in the hospital or not if her #s go up anymore (she'll be checked again tomorrow I think)...

 

[sugarpie]

I would just have the party, then. Videotape it for her if you can.

 

[golfgal]

I would just have the party, then. Videotape it for her if you can.

That is what I would do and then have someone bring her the gifts. I would have someone open the gifts in her place at the party and then have whomever bring them to her house. Everyone will understand completly.

 

[holycow]

My SIL couldn't make her shower and we still had it. Video taped everyones baby advise and then took pics of everyone and their present. (they actually opened the presents for her and took the pic of the item with the person who gave it.) Put it in a nice photo album for her.

(if she has High BP this might be the way to go...less stress!)

Good luck!

HC

 

[hlbtimes2]

I would call the guests and let them know what is going on. Tell them you would still love to have the shower. Take a lot of pictures and video tape things as well. Get a nice little book and have guests write messages to the mom to be.

Ask the guests to bring the gift unwrapped, along with some baby wrapping paper (no gift bags allowed!). Let the guests all show their gifts to the other guests. Then as a game, blindfold them and have them wrap their gift. Who ever does the best job wins a prize.

My mom was in New Mexico when she had my sister (43 years ago). Her friends and family were all in WA. They did the blindfold wrap game and sent the gifts and pictures to my mom. Of course with an explanation of why the packages were wrapped so messy!

 

[4cruisin]

My SIL couldn't make her shower and we still had it. Video taped everyones baby advise and then took pics of everyone and their present. (they actually opened the presents for her and took the pic of the item with the person who gave it.) Put it in a nice photo album for her.

(if she has High BP this might be the way to go...less stress!)

Good luck!

HC

I think that's the way to go. It's such short notice to cancel and I'm sure would rather have everyone get together to celebrate even if she can't be there. A phone call so she could talk to everyone (if she feels up to it) would be nice too.

I hope she feels better soon.

 

[CEDmom]

If it's possible to reschedule I'd try to do that. If not, could a few of you make the drive to the mom-to-be's house along with some food, gifts etc? You could do a mini shower there while the rest of the people get together at the main shower and get eachother on the phone.

I just saw your other post about not being able to go to her. Chances are she may be on bedrest for the remainder of her pregnancy so rescheduling could be tricky. I'd have the shower, video tape it and also call during it.

 

[agnes!]

Here's my idea...
If she's well enough to stay at home, see if some kind of webcam(or someone can bring their video/cellphone?) could be set-up so she can "attend" while the party is going on. Video the party, take lots of pics & then have someone go up to her place taking gifts/photos/videos to her in a more low-key setting.
(Maybe overnight some goodies or call up a bakery/restaurant & arrange a lunch delivery. That way so she can eat a few goodies while the party's going on.)

agnes!

 

[NMAmy]

When I was pregnant with dd, my ex was in the military and we had just moved to a strange town all the way across the country. My mom had a baby shower back home with all the family. They brought unwrapped gifts and my mom provided wrapping paper, ribbons, bows, etc and they had a wrapping party and videotaped it for me. It was wonderful--and they all got to ooh and ahh over the gifts before they were sent to me.

It was so great to know that everyone was thinking of me. Perhaps this is a possiblity?

 

[Tricia1972]

I love the idea of having the shower with a webcam or video taping it. I also really like the idea of wrapping the gifts at the shower and then sending them to the mom with the video tape.

Could you go to the dollar store or factory paper store and buy a bulk of baby shower paper. Ask the guests to bring their gifts unwrapped and you could have a wrapping party at the shower.

I would suggest calling everyone though to let them know the change in plans, explaining that the mom is too sick to come down.

How far out is the mom to be? Hope that her numbers are OK and she can go to term!

 

[mtemm]

I would call the guests and let them know what is going on. Tell them you would still love to have the shower. Take a lot of pictures and video tape things as well. Get a nice little book and have guests write messages to the mom to be.

Ask the guests to bring the gift unwrapped, along with some baby wrapping paper (no gift bags allowed!). Let the guests all show their gifts to the other guests. Then as a game, blindfold them and have them wrap their gift. Who ever does the best job wins a prize.

My mom was in New Mexico when she had my sister (43 years ago). Her friends and family were all in WA. They did the blindfold wrap game and sent the gifts and pictures to my mom. Of course with an explanation of why the packages were wrapped so messy!

omg, I love this. or you could not unwrap the gifts, but still videotape everyone...have them leave a message of hope or of advice for the mom to be. hopefully someone can drive the gifts to her and she can open them herself

I came very close to missing my shower due to pih. thankfully my bp held steady enough that my dr. allowed me to attend, although it really had skyrocketed by the time the shower was over. I would have been so sad to miss it, but would have loved it if people still came and made me a video diary of it.

 

[luvmyfam444]

thanks for all the replies! Loved all the great ideas !!

my dh ended up making the decision (its his sis)...he decided we should reschedule it since it may be her only kid & this ould be her only shower so he'd hate for her to miss the experience - which of cpurse made sense. her inlaws will be traveling to see her now & will bring their presents - so @ least she'll get something....

btw she's 34 wks & they're hoping she can make it to 37 then they'll take baby then...so well have the party 8 wks or so later -I guess....then I'll ask y'all again how to handle things....do you try to buy same invites? change them? or what?

 

[hlbtimes2]

While I can see your husbands side of it- it sort of sucks. Now people are going to have to return any small size clothing they bought, and SIL might not have some of the things she needs.

I had showers for both of my kids after they were born, but we were able to have them within 2-3 weeks of their births.

 

[froglady]

While I can see your husbands side of it- it sort of sucks. Now people are going to have to return any small size clothing they bought, and SIL might not have some of the things she needs.

I had showers for both of my kids after they were born, but we were able to have them within 2-3 weeks of their births.

I agree. It might not be doable for a while, and many people may have purchased gifts that will be needed as soon as the baby gets home...bath towels, tub, newborn clothes, etc.

You may not be able to find another convenient date, especially with the holidays coming up.

And if she's on bedrest, opening the gifts and looking at them will give her something to do, and help keep her eyes on the prize.

 

[froglady]

thanks for all the replies! Loved all the great ideas !!


btw she's 34 wks & they're hoping she can make it to 37 then they'll take baby then...so well have the party 8 wks or so later -I guess....then I'll ask y'all again how to handle things....do you try to buy same invites? change them? or what?

That would be Thanksgiving week, so it might be better or worse, depending upon your family and friends.