What Would You Do ?

[vanillarum]

Here is my dilemma: We are booked for the All Star Music in Aug.'07. This will be our 4th trip to the world. We are a family of 4, myself, DW,DD9,DS15. On our previous 3 trips we have all flown. We live in Mass, btw. The problem is that my DW is petrified to fly. Has been since the kids were born. Bc (before children), we flew to the Carribean, Hawaii, all over with no problem. But now, actually last 14 yrs, my DW needs prescription meds and alcohol to get on a plane, and she still hates it ! So she has decided that she will take the train in Aug. and my DD has agreed to accompany her, while my DS and I fly. We talked about driving down, and my DW would prefer this, but I don't really want to do it. She says she doesn't mind taking the train and is actually looking forward to it. I'm feeling a little guilty about not driving, but my DW is a very nervous passenger, and even sharing the driving, it might get ugly ! My kids travel relatively well, but our longest drive has only been 8 hours. I would greatly appreciate any insight or advice ! Thanx gang.

 

[flying_babyb]

I would say let your Dw and DD take the train. your DW is cool with that and It will be good to let her and DD spend some Mother dauther time together.

 

[JESW]

Does you DW know WHY she doesn't like to fly? Is she afraid of the plane crashing? This may sound extremely morbid, but I also hate to fly. The way I figure it, if the plane crashes then most likely we will all die. If we split up and some drive, fly or take a train, then I would worry endlessly about the ones who weren't with me.

I am also from MA and so far I haven't flown anywhere else other than to Orlando as it is just under 3 hours and I can handle that. I loved flying SONG as they had the little tv's and headphones and I could turn on HGTV and zone out for the flight. Our next trip we are flying Jet Blue.

I would prefer to get there fast instead of driving or going on a train...but that's just me.

I hope that you can come to some resolution. (Once flights open up for august I will be booking for then)

Jill

 

[flying_babyb]

thinking about it, this even sounds odd to me but why not have her hypontised?

 

[dsnymomof4]

IMHO, whatever you decide, I think you should all travel together! If she really wants to take the train, then why don't you all take the train? Make that a fun start to your vacation. If you do decide to drive, that could be fun too. We've driven from NJ several times and the kids were fine. We like to drive overnight, so kids sleep most of the way. But, I really think (again, just my opinion) that since this is a family vacation, you should all stay together.

 

[A&CsMom]

My DH also hates to fly. He has only flown twice - once to the east coast of Canada and back when he was in the army (before I knew him), and once on our honeymoon from Toronto to Orlando and back. That is when I found out that he hates to fly. We had only done fairly short driving vacations while we were dating due to financial constraints. For him it is the lack of control - he also usually drives when we are in the car together. He said if he could fly the plane he would be okay with flying. Like your wife, he thinks that if something goes wrong, it is highly unlikely anyone will survive. So, we drive to Orlando from Ontario. However, we both like the drive and I take over for a few hours per day, at least. Growing up, I went to Florida about 6 times with my family, and we only flew once, so it's not a big deal to me. My feeling is that if your DW is okay with taking the train, and your DD, let them. My DH has offered to drive down by himself and me, DS and DD fly and meet him there, but personally like I said, I don't mind the drive and I consider it part of our vacation. My DH and I have some of our best conversations during long drives. Do what works for your family, even if it means you all don't travel together, as long as everyone is comfortable with their decision.

 

[hollyb]

We all go together, wouldn't be able to live with myself if anything happened.

 

[3princesses+aprince]

I would never put half of my family on a plane either, you never know. That said, I am NOT flying either...

We are taking the Amtrak train, we are in RI so it will be 1 day on the train, but i've already started thinking about what I was going to buy for entertainment on the train, and what kind of games we will play. I'm not trying to fool myself, I know it will get rough at times, but i'm trying to make it part of the vacation. My kids have never been on a train before, so they will be excited about it anyway, and none of my kids enjoyed the plane either , all of their ears hurt when we went about 2 years ago. If your wife wants to take the train, give it a try. I'm really looking forward to it . Good Luck.

 

[Disneydreaming6]

I too am afraid to fly. I have driven to disney 9 out of the last 10 times we've been. I love the drive, we make it part of the vacation by stopping off along the way on the way back. I did fly this last time with the help of meds. It wasn't so bad since I kept telling myself it's only 2.5 hrs, only another 1 hr left, etc and the time did go by very quickly. About putting half the family on the train, and the other half flying, I would prob do it, but the whole time I would be worrying if the other half is alright, and not enjoy the trip, soooo, if I'm going to worry myself sick might as well take the plane at least it would be over quicker.

 

[Monkeyfeet]

There is a great book, Flying w/out Fear. There is also a good course online and it is free.

Just a FYI, mixing alcohol and prescription meds while in high elevations can be fatal.

 

[PollyannaMom]

I'm with poster #2. It's kind of neat for you each to have a 1-on-1 adventure with one kid, then meet up for your vacation all together. I'd say go with what works for you!

 

[flying_babyb]

I loved one on one adventures with my Divorced parents (who would go on one vacation,the three of us, as a fmaily).

 

[Nascia]

I'm like your wife too. I refuse to fly with the kids. DH and I have flown to London and Greece within the last 2 years and will be flying to St. Vincent in May, but we drive everywhere with the kids, including our 20 hour trips to WDW. My fear isn't so much surviving, but having the kids look to me to help when I am totally helpless. Sorry to sound morbid, but it's something I can't get over, DH understands and always drives with us, even though it takes so much longer.

 

[camdensmom]

Well...there is a happy medium.

When I moved to Orlando (from MA) I took the autotrain. It leaves from VA (just near DC). Basically you drive from MA to VA and they put you and your car on the train. The train left at around noon so I did the bulk of my driving at night and missed NY and PA traffic. Once on the train I read, had a nice dinner, slept and woke up in FL. They let you off in Sanford which is about 45 north of Disney. The best part is that you will have your car down there.

I think you can get info from the Amtrak website. I have also become a nervous flyer since having a baby, but my logic is that the odds of a plane crash are far less than my odds of a train or car wreck so I'll happily take the 2.5 hours on a plane.

 

[MeLaNie9]

I don't like to fly either, but have to sometimes for work. Most of my trips to WDW as a kid were via car. In 2000, DH and I drove also. We made a stop in Savannah and did some sight-seeing for 2 days then headed on to WDW. We flew for our trip in May at DH's insistence. I was about 14 weeks pregnant at the time, just getting over my nausea but was so nauseous before boarding the plane that I had to take anti-nausea medication. I was just so nervous and scared about flying, and especially about flying with our DS2! I had begged DH to drive or take the car train from Washington DC (my brother lives there so we could visit them and then head out on the train) for our next trip to WDW and he agreed until this on-site work conference came up for me in Feb. We will be flying again. I am probably going to have to take some Benadryl before the flight - its at 8am so drinking might not look too good I would say have your DW do what is most comfortable for her. It would be terrible to start off and end the trip with too much anxiety! Some people absolutely cannot get on that plane - I will, but will need a little help!

 

[laceemouse]

I'm like your wife too. I refuse to fly with the kids. DH and I have flown to London and Greece within the last 2 years and will be flying to St. Vincent in May, but we drive everywhere with the kids, including our 20 hour trips to WDW. My fear isn't so much surviving, but having the kids look to me to help when I am totally helpless. Sorry to sound morbid, but it's something I can't get over, DH understands and always drives with us, even though it takes so much longer.

See, this is weird to me. I refuse to fly with just my hubby and me. If the plane went down my kids would be orphans! We have left them to my sis and BIL in our will, but how awful it would be if they lost BOTH of us. We generally drive most trips, but when we do fly it is ALL TOGETHER. I would prefer for us to be all together. Really,the odds of a car crash are so much greater than a plane going down anyway....Dh flys almost weekly for work. It would be terrbile if something happened to him, but the kids would still have me, we have good insurance, ect...He doesn't mind it. We will fly to WDW next month, I just keep thinking two days on the road versus a couple of hours on the plane....it will be so nice to get there quick!!!
You must have great grandparents or something to leave your kids with, when you fly as well as if something happened to you and your dh.

 

[susieq76]

We all go together, wouldn't be able to live with myself if anything happened.

I agree 100%. We are flying this time but the past three trips we have drove down (we're from NY). If you do the trip right (drive during off times and take a lot of breaks) its actually a fun trip.

 

[luvsmickeymouse]

I would say let your Dw and DD take the train. your DW is cool with that and It will be good to let her and DD spend some Mother dauther time together.

This is the way I would go!

 

[nextidiot]

I have been to WDW once but I have been to Florida several times. I would suggest driving as a family. I am about 13 hours from Disney and further from WPB. We leave after work and drive about 7 or 8 hours, stop, then drive the rest of the way on day 2 reaching Orlando around 2P-4P. The drive down is always a blast. OTOH, the drive back can be tiresome with the post-vacation blues and all. Still, I say drive.

 

[flying_babyb]

Driving would depend on the age of the kids, think sceaming 2 year old.