What would you do...son's website!!

[LindsayDunn228]

I think some of the posts sound flamish and I applaud the OP for stating her concerns and the polite way she has answered the people who are
sneaking in little digs at her and her son.

I'm not sneaking in digs at her son. Just stating my opinion that there should be some accountability.

 

[magicmirror]

I think some of the posts sound flamish and I applaud the OP for stating her concerns and the polite way she has answered the people who are
sneaking in little digs at her and her son.

I agree.

To me it boils down to the fact that, at 13, he can't realize the dangers lurking on the internet. Children are immature and naive; they are not "just short adults", this is why we call them "children". Because of this what's "real" for a child, is usually that which they can see. They need adult guidance and supervision. At his age he can't fully understand how aweful people can be, how little pieces of information, potentially, could be used by someone. As adults, we know that the dangers of putting personal information on the internet are very real. Children are told this. Some still put too much out there. He did what he was told to do. It was the teacher's responsibility to overlook his work, and ensure his private information wasn't made public. I will step down from my soap box now.

 

[kimmar067]

All I meant by that was you are going to do what you are going to do, it's your kid, not mine. No need to be upset about it. That wasn't a flame.

...if it LOOKS like a 'dig', and SOUNDS like a 'dig', and SMELLS like a 'dig', and ACTS like a 'dig'........

 

[robinb]

...if it LOOKS like a 'dig', and SOUNDS like a 'dig', and SMELLS like a 'dig', and ACTS like a 'dig'........

Yes, you're right. Your post is a dig.

 

[Mom2Ashli]

Kathy - I am so sorry this happened to your family. I would be very upset also.

The teacher's assignment was a good one but she DIDN'T have to post it on the internet for WHOEVER to see. She used poor judgement putting it out there.

 

[slo]

I'm just stopping by this thread to show my support for eeyoresmountainpals

I don't have time to respond to all the posts here, but I do want to say that I have known the OP for awhile now and she is not an overreactor She is a wonderful mother and wife that wants to keep her family safe. Please put yourself in her shoes if your child's teacher did the same thing with your child's information. I would think teacher's would be teaching about not putting info on the internet as much as they are teaching to not do drugs. This teacher made the mistake, not the child.

Now you all can say he's 13 and he should know better - but he didn't know what was to totally become of this assignment. Can you imagine how confused the poor boy feels right now. He did what he was told by the teacher because he wanted a good grade. But in turn, it was wrong and now his parents are upset - not with him, but still upset. How confusing for a young boy. I feel bad for him and I hope eeyoresmountainpals gives him a hug from me

Please stop giving the OP a hard time about this. She's an excellent mom and is coming for the DIS for help and advice - not for flames . I have no problem with people not agreeing with her - we all have to agree to disagree at times. But I think we can disagree with people w/o hurting their feelings or making them feel bad.

Gotta run - have a good day everyone!!

 

[momof2inPA]

I think bringing it to the attention of the school and making sure the info was removed is an appropriate reaction. Anything beyond that is excessive and overreacting, IMHO.

Exactly. She's just whining at this point. The teacher made a "mistake." The only people who never make mistakes at their jobs are the people who do nothing, but apparently the OP only wants responses that say the school needs to pay for what they have done. Maybe she could ask the school to install an alarm system in her home or, better yet, hire a body guard for her son.

 

[DISUNC]

Exactly. She's just whining at this point. The teacher made a "mistake." The only people who never make mistakes at their jobs are the people who do nothing, but apparently the OP only wants responses that say the school needs to pay for what they have done. Maybe she could ask the school to install an alarm system in her home or, better yet, hire a body guard for her son.

I see NO evidence of the OP whining on this thread or asking for any financial compensation AT ALL! In Fact I see all of her responses are highly commendable in the face a some very nasty and 'uncalled for' comments!!!!

 

[eeyoresmountainpals]

I see NO evidence of the OP whining on this thread or asking for any financial compensation AT ALL! In Fact I see all of her responses are highly commendable in the face a some very nasty and 'uncalled for' comments!!!!

Thank you!!!

 

[eeyoresmountainpals]

I cannot believe some of the responses here. I never intended this thread to become a forum for some of you to personally attack me and my family.

I am not "whining." I am simply stating that something was done wrong. The teacher did something that could have put our son in danger and let's not forget that in doing so she violated school policies. The teacher should be held accountable for her mistake and she should try to make it right with our son.

I do not want the school to "pay" for what has been done. If that were the case I would be sitting in a lawyer's office. I am not out for the teacher's job. I don't want her fired. I never claimed that the school or the teacher need to "pay" for this (unless you consider an apology "payment").

Yes, the website was taken down. But I still feel that the teacher should apologize to our son. (I think she owes my husband and I an apology for it as well but if she spoke to our son about it and explained to him that she was wrong but took action to correct her mistake then I would be fine with that and not care about an apology to DH or I.)

We all make mistakes. But we need to take the responsibility to correct those mistakes, apologize if we have done something wrong to somebody and learn from those mistakes. The teacher has taken care of the first part by pulling the website off the internet - she corrected her mistake. But what kind of a message does it send to our son that it's okay to break rules, violate policies and then go on like nothing has happened. She should have at least talked to him and made a lesson out of this. It would have been a lesson in internet safety in the fact that she could explain why it shouldn't have been put on the internet in the way that it had been AND it could have been a lesson in the proper way to handle taking responsibility for your own mistakes and making them right. In talking to him about the whole situation she could have put herself up there as a role model to show that mistakes are made but they need to be handled correctly when they are made. Mistakes happen but you earn respect for how you handle a situation after the mistake has been made.


I want to thank those of you that have politely responded to my thread, whether you agreed with me or not.

Some of you agreed 100% with me and said that you would react the same way if faced with the same situation.

Some of you said I was overreacting and went on to give your opinion of why you thought I was overreacting and I appreciate the time that you took to respond. Just because we don't agree doesn't mean that either of us is necessarily right or wrong, but just seeing things differently.

I also want to thank those of you that have jumped on here in my defense and stood up for me when others chose use words to attack me and my family.


I have gotten the information that I started this thread for - to find out what others thought. In my heart I feel that I am not overreacting and I feel that I need to do what I feel is best for my family.

I also feel lucky that I have made a few new dis friends through this thread. I've receieved many PMs supporting me and reassuring me that they feel some of the comments posted on here have been uncalled for. It's a shame that a thread can't be started asking for input without people having to post personal attacks against others, whether it be against the me as the OP or against another poster. There have been both of those types of attacks - name calling - on here and that really is a shame. Because of this I am going to ask to have the thread closed.

Thanks again to those of you that politely posted your thoughts.

 

[r3ngels]

I agree... I have never seen such attacks for a Mom who is trying to PROTECT her family .... I would rather have more Moms looking out for their kids than Mom's who could care less-- we have too many of them in this world JMHO

Hugs for eeyoresmountainpals don't let the negativity get you down...enjoy the start of your summer

 

[momof2inPA]

If the teacher has taken the website down, and you have explained to your son why it is wrong to post personal info on the net, why would the teacher need to re-explain the situation? But honestly, if that's what you want, write her a little note or call the office. I'm sure they'll comply and you can happily drop the subject, right? Not so tough. It doesn't seem that you want a resolution to your problem, though. You just want everyone to be aghast at the teacher's mistake. I don't think it's that big of a deal, and many other people suggested you were over-reacting. If you consider that flaming, by all means, round up your troops from the "Last One to Post" thread and have them post in your defense.

 

[grimley1968]

If the teacher has taken the website down, and you have explained to your son why it is wrong to post personal info on the net, why would the teacher need to re-explain the situation? But honestly, if that's what you want, write her a little note or call the office. I'm sure they'll comply and you can happily drop the subject, right? Not so tough. It doesn't seem that you want a resolution to your problem, though. You just want everyone to be aghast at the teacher's mistake. I don't think it's that big of a deal, and many other people suggested you were over-reacting. If you consider that flaming, by all means, round up your troops from the "Last One to Post" thread and have them post in your defense.

The OP had sort of let the subject drop. It was completely off the front page of this forum, until YOU brought it back up with your post.

What does one's participation in the "Last one to post" thread have to do with this issue?

Why does this have to be so personal? I've not seen one bit of whining by the OP. She has simply posted her experience and what she has a problem with. Some people, like me, were bothered that the school allowed personal info to be posted on a public website without making sure it was appropriate for public consumption. Others weren't so bothered and thought the OP needn't worry. However, there's no need for personal attacks.

If anything, YOU are the one coming across as "whiny" with the crack about the "Last one to post" thread.

 

[momof2inPA]

I don't understand why the OP felt attacked. People didn't agree with her, that happens when you post on the internet. I just feel sorry for the teacher.

 

[grimley1968]

I don't understand why the OP felt attacked. People didn't agree with her, that happens when you post on the internet. I just feel sorry for the teacher.

Maybe this will make you "understand" better:

If you consider that flaming, by all means, round up your troops from the "Last One to Post" thread and have them post in your defense

This was uncalled-for, and sure looks like an attack to me.

It doesn't seem that you want a resolution to your problem, though. You just want everyone to be aghast at the teacher's mistake.

This is an assumption on your part, and worded so as to paint the OP in an unfavorable light. The OP was merely soliciting opinions, and got them, and was polite to those who disagreed politely. She never came across to me the way you are describing it. Continually putting down someone in this manner seems pretty "attackish" to me.

Another pretty personal attack from earlier:

Exactly. She's just whining at this point. The teacher made a "mistake." The only people who never make mistakes at their jobs are the people who do nothing, but apparently the OP only wants responses that say the school needs to pay for what they have done. Maybe she could ask the school to install an alarm system in her home or, better yet, hire a body guard for her son.

Hyperbolic sarcasm can be fun to read, when not done at another's expense. But I find it to be pretty unpleasant when aimed at someone like the above.

I, for one, appreciate the OP's post. It points out, to me, that we can't rely on our kids' teachers in all the ways we would like to, such as the common sense of realizing that 13 YO kids aren't always going to realize how dangerous it is to post personal information on a website.

 

[Good Ol Gal]

If the teacher has taken the website down, and you have explained to your son why it is wrong to post personal info on the net, why would the teacher need to re-explain the situation? But honestly, if that's what you want, write her a little note or call the office. I'm sure they'll comply and you can happily drop the subject, right? Not so tough. It doesn't seem that you want a resolution to your problem, though. You just want everyone to be aghast at the teacher's mistake. I don't think it's that big of a deal, and many other people suggested you were over-reacting. If you consider that flaming, by all means, round up your troops from the "Last One to Post" thread and have them post in your defense.

this is just uncalled for. I proudly consider myself on of the LTP sisters and I haven't come on here yet, but I was the FIRST person to know about this problem.

Why did I not come on here??? Because I already shared my thoughts with the OP on this matter and she was looking for others thoughts and opinions.

As for me, I was a victim of childhood abuse and I am proud of the OP for doing what she felt was necessary to take care of her child and keep him safe. I only wish my mother had her eyes open when I was a child and took such an interest in my well being.

I came by here today b/c my friend is feeling attack by members of a family board. I think it's shameful.

I may not agree with everything in every post by every person but I hope that when I do disagree I do it respectfully.

 

[Stephieann]

On a larger issue, I find it interesting that schools often have the policy of NOT publishing names with photos of students on the school website, yet a school (or parents, coaches, community members) will submit a photo and names (and articles) to the local newspaper for publication - and that article and photo gets printed in traditional print form AND ends up in the online version of the newspaper (and therefore archived) - and we don't think a thing about it.

I dont know about your schools but at ours at the begining of the year we have to sign permission forms for our children getting on the internet, going on field trips and EVEN TO PUT PHOTOS AND INFO IN THE LOCAL PAPER!!! At first i thought the newspaper permission was kinda crazy but now i understand.

 

[spaceacewannabe]

I dont know about your schools but at ours at the begining of the year we have to sign permission forms for our children getting on the internet, going on field trips and EVEN TO PUT PHOTOS AND INFO IN THE LOCAL PAPER!!! At first i thought the newspaper permission was kinda crazy but now i understand.

Here, any picture that shows a child's face can only be shown (beyond district staff) with written parental permission. If a teacher needs to look for a new job and is using photos of class activities in a portfolio, the teacher needs permission from the student's if their faces are shown.
We as staff cannot discuss a student in an identifiable way with other staff via e-mail if we are accessing our school e-mail from home as it is not secure, and we must have permission (going to be written starting next year) to communicate via e-mail with parents because it is not fully secure.

Now, to the OP, I agree that it's disturbing but I also agree that probably almost no one has seen it, so try not to worry Most school websites aren't interesting enough to linger, and hopefully your husband's enemies aren't very resourceful I really think from that end, you'll be okay, but I'd be freaking out. My dad is also in law enforcement and actually teaches about child safety and online child predators.

To be totally honest, I haven't waded through this whole thread, but I see it's getting heated and I don't really know why. I think the OP was just looking to share something that she was stressed about...this is my first time on the community board, but I thought the idea was to provide some emotional support and an outlet?

As far as wanting more of an explanation from the teacher, I suggest contacting her. She may be eager to explain or apologize, and she'll appreciate it (at least I would) if you go straight to her instead of stewing over it or going over her head to complain. And she may already have been disciplined. Maybe I've missed something, but I'm not feeling too sorry for her. If you'd like an apology, though, don't ask for it (since I know that's not how you want it, and I can't blame you), but maybe just call her and ask if you could sit down and talk sometime? She's probably very embarassed and maybe can't get up the nerve to take the initiative, but I would hope she is sorry and I'm betting it won't happen again on her watch (but it would probably be nice to hear it!)

As far as punishing the child, how was the OP's son to know it was actually going to be posted? Eeks. You can make a website without putting it on the internet, and I think I'd have interpretted it the same way he did. If it's just for the teacher, it's NOT too much info. To me it sounds like he'd have known better had he known that it was going to be a *live* website.

Anyway, if I'd made a huge boo-boo like that with a student, I'd be embarassed and mortified but I'd also want the opportunity to apologize.

Edited to add to it once I read the rest of the thread.

 

[The DIS Moderator Team]

Thread closed at OPs request.