What Drives Me Crazy as an Elementary School Secretary...

[Sleestack]

People complain here all the time who work at restaurants and retail stores. I'm sure they realize that everyone who reads here shops and eats out, but they still vent. What's the difference? OP, vent away. This is the community board!

I dont think Ive EVER vented here without SOMEONE telling me what I felt was wrong. Some people are just so blasted smart they they KNOW EVERYTHING.
I agree. Vent away. But know one thing... people here love to eat your feelings for lunch. Ignore it and vent to those of us who will actually listen.

 

[Planogirl]

As the OP I am more informing about what might slow down my day. Is it a big deal? Not at all. That's what I'm there for. To treat your children kindly and lovingly as you do. Even more than my own kids.

With this, I'm trying to explain to you that your children should know their phone number. Not for my sake, but for their own. What if they were to get lost, or heaven forbid get abducted. They should be able to tell time. Parents can have communication about their teacher and what happened during their day. Are we so busy that we can't accomplish these?

I'm not going to get defensive. I get paid to do my job, I love it. I adore your children and love it when they say Ms. Deb I need help. I may get frustrated but not because I have to look up a number, but because kids should know this information.

Don't let them get to you and vent away. I appreciate it when someone in a profession posts advice (and yes, this was good advice). SOME parents truly are clueless at times.

 

[OceanAnnie]

I dont think Ive EVER vented here without SOMEONE telling me what I felt was wrong. Some people are just so blasted smart they they KNOW EVERYTHING.
I agree. Vent away. But know one thing... people here love to eat your feelings for lunch. Ignore it and vent to those of us who will actually listen.

Sad but true. Not all but certainly enough.

 

[scrapquitler]

I guess what I wonder is why children don't know their own phone numbers. Like I stated previously, wouldn't you want your children to know who to contact in case of an emergency?

Yes, I do get paid and I earn every penny of it.

Well I must be a VERY bad mom then.

I don't know my own 14 years old child's cell phone number I just can't seem to memorize it, even though I am usually very good with phone numbers. I have her number programmed into my phone's speed dial, so I never ever dial it. And same with her and my cell phone number: she has to look in her phone to tell you what my cell number is.

And my 7 year old son has no idea of our home phone number. I practice it every day with him, but he just can't seem to remember it. Firstly, he's dyslexic, so he just can't seem to get his brain around it. Besides that: there's two phone lines in our house, mom's cell number, dad's cell number, big sister's cell number. So yeah, it's pretty confusing for little guys even if they aren't dyslexic. It's not like when we were little and there was ONE phone number to know. Now there's a pile of them with cellphones, and they even need to know the area code (in my area, we have to dial the area code always, and starting in a few months, the person across the street might be in a different area code than my house)

 

[dairyou]

Well I must be a VERY bad mom then.

I don't know my own 14 years old child's cell phone number I just can't seem to memorize it, even though I am usually very good with phone numbers. I have her number programmed into my phone's speed dial, so I never ever dial it. And same with her and my cell phone number: she has to look in her phone to tell you what my cell number is.

And my 7 year old son has no idea of our home phone number. I practice it every day with him, but he just can't seem to remember it. Firstly, he's dyslexic, so he just can't seem to get his brain around it. Besides that: there's two phone lines in our house, mom's cell number, dad's cell number, big sister's cell number. So yeah, it's pretty confusing for little guys even if they aren't dyslexic. It's not like when we were little and there was ONE phone number to know. Now there's a pile of them with cellphones, and they even need to know the area code (in my area, we have to dial the area code always, and starting in a few months, the person across the street might be in a different area code than my house)

No one ever said that this qualifies you as a bad mom Of course there are legitimate exceptions in every case.

Deb

 

[DisneyScraps]

I am shocked by any parent that doesn't know the teachers name. Do you realize how much time that person spends with your child, how much influence they have on them?

I know more than I need to about my DDs teacher . We talk about school all the time. This teacher is chatty and share her personal information with DD and she tells me.

Lisa

 

[MamaLema]

OK, so now when I go to pick my kids up for a dentist appointment, I have to worry about the secratary judging me.

I have 3 kids and all 3 have a teacher that starts with the letter "B" and they all sound similar. Add to this that the older ones have had the teachers before and everyone changes grades, and I guess I'm one of *those* mothers.

When I picked one child up, I did have to think about the teachers name for a minute. I know their teachers' names but when you have 3 teachers with very similar last names, sometimes you need a minute!

 

[barkley]

parent semi-vent (or p.s.a. for school admin staff as i prefer to call it-and i used to be in this category)-


if you want me to know who my child's "teacher" is-tell me. my kids end up with multiple teachers, student teachers and the like. i've gotten rude treatment from school staff when i've called about something (or e-mailed) using the ONLY name i've ever been given as my kid's "teacher" when come to find out it's someone else entirely. my kids are pretty good about telling me which teacher is which, but esp. at ds's private school-when there's multiple "mrs. smiths" (all who seem to be related b/c when you straighten it out you get "oh, that's such and such's cousin's dd's sil....), or the kids are not given the teacher's last name ("miss first name") and there's 15 different teachers all with that same first name

if you want my address or phone number look at the piles of papers i gave you. i was specific on what numbers and addresses to use; barring an absolute emergency there is nothing at school that my address is needed for that someone can't look it up (if the puter's down-look at the hard copies). and for gosh sakes-please also look and take note of that the box THE SCHOOL put on the papers for me to check saying i do not want my phone number/e-mail address/ physical address being given out to anyone or printed for public distribution. i should'nt have to highlight it, then deal with the fallout after i've even reminded the school that i've opted for this and they go ahead and print up something that distributes it to whomever gets ahold of it after it leaves the building. when you work in certain fields like social services, law enforcement and the like-the safety of yourself and your kids is dependant on confidential information remaining confidential. when you tell me not to worry b/c it only went home to my kid's classmate's home i am precluded by law in telling you that one of my kid's classmate's mom is one of my clients-and thus far i've successfully kept her from realizing our kids are in the same class, because if she knew she would SO like my private contact info. b/c the last time she threatened my life she was very specific in telling me she is in the process of "hunting me down" that's also why dh and i would get so upset when we repeatedly told the school/individual teachers not to share what line of work we were in with anyone- only to have another parent approach us at a school event (or a birthday party) with that info. and when we ask how they knew-being told the teacher or someone in the office just mentioned it "in passing"

that's the major consideration with my private info- but getting added to some parent's 'scentcy' or other business e-mailing list, having some idot student thinking it's my kid's e-mail (vs. the private one for myself) and mailing me questionable crap, or deciding to make prank calls to my unlisted home phone (and i pay for that service) is equaly annoying.


all that said-

i give HUGE kudos to the public school dd goes to. they have an automated system with all the phone numbers in it-if it were a whole school emergency all three of my listed numbers as well as the emergency contact get auto dialed and sent the identical info. if that system's down at the school then the district office handles it cuz cell phones are'nt an option-even if someone wanted my kid to call me from their locked down classroom they could'nt, their school is situated in a geographic location where no matter what cell phone provider you've got-there is no service. i get at bare minimum 2 e-mails a week, one from the superintendant and one from the principal (mass info. mailing to all parents), but in reality i average at least 2-4 a day because her school is EXCELLENT on providing information on schedual changes, teacher changes (or introducing new student teachers and telling what courses they will be in) and everything that's going on. their staff is phenominal at looking to their own records before ever contacting us for information-and the information stays in the files year to year, so if a situation comes up they can look and see if it's occured in the past and maybe, just maybe they already have whatever info. on hand

 

[barkley]

OK, so now when I go to pick my kids up for a dentist appointment, I have to worry about the secratary judging me.

I have 3 kids and all 3 have a teacher that starts with the letter "B" and they all sound similar. Add to this that the older ones have had the teachers before and everyone changes grades, and I guess I'm one of *those* mothers.

When I picked one child up, I did have to think about the teachers name for a minute. I know their teachers' names but when you have 3 teachers with very similar last names, sometimes you need a minute!

the pediatric dentist my kids go to got tired of parents getting flack from some schools about missing class for appointments so they did outreach to the schools and explained that while they tried to keep afterschool hours/more hours during school breaks available for routine appointments and exams the reality is that there are not enough afterschool/during school break hours in any year that could accomodate every kid they serve. they get all the school calendars and purposely slot as many opening around class time, but they told the schools that if they were going to help in this way the schools needed to be reciprocal and not give the parents flack b/c if a parent was calling about an appointment during class time the likelyhood was it was either an emergent need or something that absolutly could'nt perform late in the day.

 

[MushyMushy]

I have to laugh about parents who don't know the teachers' names. I knew them, but there were any number of reasons I'd freeze up about it in the main office: Because Mrs. Smith was Miss Jones when I had her back in the dark ages. Because I just got finished talking to my son's teacher and now I'm going to see my daughter's teacher. Because I'm having a brain fart. Because I'm flustered and got her name mixed up with someone else (hey, I even do that with my kids and dogs -- don't you ever yell out the wrong one's name?).

You know what bugs me about school secretaries (and I'm not saying YOU, but this has been my experience over the past 6 years at my childrens' school)

*please don't make me feel unwelcome in my childrens's school. I have a legitimate right to be there. I'm volunteering/meeting with a teacher/etc. I know some parents drop by all the time with frivolous requests, but that is not my purpose.

*if you don't like dealing with parents, then why bother working in a school. I mean really!!

vent over. Sorry OP, but you touched on a nerve.

karenos

Oh yes. I have to give kudos -- most of the secretaries at my kids' schools were fantastic. You could tell they were juggling a million things, but still had a smile or time to be polite when you walked through the door. And I know they have to deal with a lot of crazies on a daily basis. But there was this one, she just made you feel like you were scum of the earth and how dare you walk into her office. The sad part is, she seemed to "follow" my youngest up through the schools! So she was there when my oldest was there in 1995. By the time my youngest went from elementary to middle school, she moved to that school. This year when DD went to high school, guess who moved to the high school. I'll have put up with this miserable woman from 1995 to 2014 when DD graduates.

 

[OceanAnnie]

I have to laugh about parents who don't know the teachers' names. I knew them, but there were any number of reasons I'd freeze up about it in the main office: Because Mrs. Smith was Miss Jones when I had her back in the dark ages. Because I just got finished talking to my son's teacher and now I'm going to see my daughter's teacher. Because I'm having a brain fart. Because I'm flustered and got her name mixed up with someone else (hey, I even do that with my kids and dogs -- don't you ever yell out the wrong one's name?).

Me too. One big reason I'd freeze up is there have been some teacher's names that are not pronounced as they are written. I take a few extra seconds to pronounce it correctly. I have two names in my mind for the same person and I have to access it quick. Or I'm in a rush and I have more than one thing and/or teacher in mind.

 

[tlbwriter]

I don't know my own 14 years old child's cell phone number I just can't seem to memorize it, even though I am usually very good with phone numbers. I have her number programmed into my phone's speed dial, so I never ever dial it. And same with her and my cell phone number: she has to look in her phone to tell you what my cell number is.

I can't manage to memorize my child's cell phone number either. But if I need to contact her and don't have my phone, I can always track her down. I can call the school. I can call her friend's mom. I can call my husband who has these numbers in *his* phone. She, on the other hand, doesn't necessarily have those resources, so she needs to know my cell and her father's cell. And if she couldn't memorize those because of dyslexia or some other issue, I'd have them on her, in writing, at all times. It's not difficult at all to make a laminated card to stick in a pocket, write the number on a rubber bracelet, etc. A disability is not an excuse to not do something, in this case - it's a reason to find a better way of doing it.

 

[jrmasm]

I admit it, I don't know my DD15's teachers names. I suck! But if I need something, I'm smart enough that I can figure it out.

I do know DD6's teacher's name.

 

[erincon23]

to the PP who said their child couldn't memorize the phone number because they were dyslexic -- how are they at memorizing song lyrics? When my DS was little, we knew he didn't have a problem like dyslexia, but he just wasn't getting the phone number. So I made it into a little tune (no other words, just the numbers) and sang it to him -- he got it in a snap. The teachers all thought it was so funny that when he had to put his phone number down for something, they'd hear him singing quietly first! He's 18 now and can still sing it to me! (this should have been an indication -- he's a music major now...)

 

[scrapquitler]

to the PP who said their child couldn't memorize the phone number because they were dyslexic -- how are they at memorizing song lyrics? When my DS was little, we knew he didn't have a problem like dyslexia, but he just wasn't getting the phone number. So I made it into a little tune (no other words, just the numbers) and sang it to him -- he got it in a snap. The teachers all thought it was so funny that when he had to put his phone number down for something, they'd hear him singing quietly first! He's 18 now and can still sing it to me! (this should have been an indication -- he's a music major now...)

That's a great idea. We'll give that a try. Sometimes he's pretty good with song lyrics, other times, not so much. But definitely worth trying