What Do You Think???

[ThreeMusketeers]

As gifts for Christmas, I am thinking maybe our family should make a donation on each recip on our xmas lists behalf to the blank charity.

Is that tacky?
Does that seem rude to the recip we are giving to?

If we decided to do this, how would we word it?

For instance:

We really only buy for Dh's family (they have so much), my sister and her family, and my parents. I might get one SMALL supplemental gift to go along with it.

Or maybe even going with a "GO GREEN" theme this holiday season. (???)
Just want to do something more meaningful than..here's the gc to target you wanted..here's the gc to old navy you wanted..you get the picture.
Thoughts??

 

[Par8hed]

My family stopped giving each other gifts several years ago because no one really needs anything and if we want something, we just go and get it.

Now we anonymously "adopt" a needy family each year and give them a Christmas that they wouldn't be able to have on their own.

 

[Disney Doll]

I think both of these are wonderful ideas.

I wish I could convince family & friends to stop with the need for thousands of gifts and do this instead.

 

[RadioNate]

This always goes over well on the Dis but on another board I visit they HATE the 'charity as a gift' gift.

So my advice is to proceed with caution. Make sure it is a cause they support.

It sounds nice in theory but I know it wouldn't go over well in my family.

 

[Par8hed]

I think both of these are wonderful ideas.

I wish I could convince family & friends to stop with the need for thousands of gifts and do this instead.

Well I can tell you that it gave me the "Christmas Spirit" for the first time in a long time. Try bringing it up with them.

 

[Buckalew11]

My side of the family doesn't exchange gifts (except for my mom--which is sorta crazy but, I digress). We usually all adopt individual families that need help and buy for them. It is wonderful to give and give to those who really need it.

 

[tzolkin]

There are two websites I have used. I like them because they let the recipient choose where the donation goes and it's more interactive, so I feel it's more of a gift than just a card saying that we donated to X on their behalf.

markmakers: This one is geared more toward kids, but there are tons of different organizations to choose from so I would think it would work for adults too. Maybe adults with kids as a family activity to decide where the money goes? It's also nice because you can split up the money any way you want. So if you gave someone $10, they could give it all to one organization or give $1 to 10 different ones.

kiva: This one makes loans to entrepreneurs around the world. You can see their profiles and decide who you want to loan the money to. They repay the loan back into your account and you can withdraw the money or donate it to someone else.


DisneyDoll: A friend of mine convinced her family to do this. They each pick a family member's name out of a hat at thanksgiving and they write down their favorite charity. Then each person buys a small present for that one person and makes a donation to their charity. That way everyone has something to open, but they don't wind up with a bunch of gifts they don't need.

 

[Todd&Copper]

Folks might get disappointed if they get cards telling them their gift was a donation int heir name to the Human Fund.

I'd ask the family members what they think of it before hand, rather than people here. Some people like to appear more generous on the Boards than they would be in real life.

Honestly, I'd personally be hurt if I took the time to really think about a gift for someone, something they can use and all I got was a schlipet of paper saying that a donation was made to some cause I would not necessarily support. I am pretty choosy about what groups I give actual money to (as opposed to donating items or time/labor) b/c so many charities have such high administrative costs. Depending on the giver, I'd also be suspicious that any donation was actually made at all. Some of my cousins are kind of shady like that.

 

[a1tinkfans]

We have LARGE families on BOTH sides and then extended family who gets together each year as well. It had gotten so out of hand.

For immediate family we only exchange "kids" gifts, no more, sisters, brothers in laws, nieces nephews, theres just WAY too many etc.

When the extended family gets together, we have already all chosen a favorite charity, tossed it/paper in a hat and then whatever gets pick we all make a donation, usually 20 a person/family. We also gather food for a food pantry and deliver it. Last year we sponsored a family thru the holiday season and that was a WONDERFUL feeling knowing that the family would have food and supplies and toys for their kids WHAT The Celebrating is really all about.

I am already starting to stock up on some food for the pantry, just buy an extra "whatever" when you get a great sale on non perishables!

 

[powellrj]

I adopt a family at Christmas time, give to animal groups and support different charities during the year. I have to be honest and say I would be a little put out to have someone decide that someone would be giving a gift in my name to a charity. I would rather give on my own than to have someone give for me.

I would rather have nothing than to start the whole donation given in my name gift. Its the same as passing gift cards back and forth. At least with the gift cards I can decide what I want to do with them. If I decide to give a gift to a shelter I can use the Target gift card for pet food for my local shelter and not a national group I may not support that would be getting my donation.

 

[hellokitty86]

Folks might get disappointed if they get cards telling them their gift was a donation int heir name to the Human Fund.

That Seinfeld episode was the first thing that came to mind when I read the OP's question.......

 

[Tinijocaro]

My family stopped giving each other gifts several years ago because no one really needs anything and if we want something, we just go and get it.

Now we anonymously "adopt" a needy family each year and give them a Christmas that they wouldn't be able to have on their own.

We do the same thing on my side of the family. DH's family still wanted to exchange, even though we often end up with coffee mugs from the "gift" aisle at Walmart.

 

[nataliela]

That Seinfeld episode was the first thing that came to mind when I read the OP's question.......

Me too! Who celebrates christmas anymore anyway? Its all about Festivus!


I think it depends on the age. If there are a lot of young kids left in the family, they might not understand why they aren't getting gifts, But if its all adults- Why not! You could get together and volunteer at a soup house or pass out handy bags to the homeless

 

[NEVERENOUGHWDW]

My family stopped giving each other gifts several years ago because no one really needs anything and if we want something, we just go and get it.

Now we anonymously "adopt" a needy family each year and give them a Christmas that they wouldn't be able to have on their own.

We do this as well. Every year the "Community Nurse" or our pastor in our town gives us ages & sex of children that are in a needy family. The parents give a list of what the children really "need" & then we add in some fun things.

In our family we have stopped giving gifts (except to our little Santa believers) and the rest of us decided it was about spending time with each other so we all go to a Broadway play and dinner and has turned into a great tradition.

All the adults had a very open conversation about wanting to make Christmas more of what it really needs to be.....it was funny that we all agreed & had all thought about stopping the gift giving but it was just never spoken about...