What do you think of this wedding gift?

[Alexander]

OP only you know the couple. If you think they would like the GC then give it to them. I have a feeling we are seeing a huge divide here and a bit of it is primarily based on age and hometown. It is really difficult to get a fair opinion from people you don't know, don't know how old they are or where they live. Ask around your workplace or other friends who may be attending the wedding.

I think groupon is trendy and trendy tends to be a younger hip crowd, and I think maybe the nay-sayers are not part of that group. Honestly, I'm not either, but can see beyond my own likes and needs and recognize that I have no idea who the couple getting married is, but they just may like the groupon gc.

 

[Gumbo4x4]

If you're trying to introduce them to fun things in their new city, maybe a gift card to a restaurant for $50 and $50 cash?

Another vote for this.

 

[gillenkl]

I would prefer cash over a groupon any day.

 

[Ciao Mickey]

OP only you know the couple. If you think they would like the GC then give it to them. I have a feeling we are seeing a huge divide here and a bit of it is primarily based on age and hometown. It is really difficult to get a fair opinion from people you don't know, don't know how old they are or where they live. Ask around your workplace or other friends who may be attending the wedding.

I think groupon is trendy and trendy tends to be a younger hip crowd, and I think maybe the nay-sayers are not part of that group. Honestly, I'm not either, but can see beyond my own likes and needs and recognize that I have no idea who the couple getting married is, but they just may like the groupon gc.

When you give a gift--any gift for any occasion--the gift given should be what the receiver would like and use--not what the giver likes and uses. If you do not 100% know that they would like what you get them, then play it safe and give $$.

If you (not you in particular) want to think *outside of the box,* do it on your own dime and with a gift you are buying for yourself.

 

[dreamin_disney]

just give $100 or $100 giftcard to wal-mart or target or to somewhere else.
Dh and I had been together for 10 year and already lived together in our home for 10 years. The best gifts we got were giftcards to wal-mart, target, dinner and cash.

I rather get a $50 giftcard to somewhere i will go and use it then $100 to somewhere I'll feel forced to use or not use at all. I dont groupon

 

[cornflake]

just give $100 or $100 giftcard to wal-mart or target or to somewhere else.
Dh and I had been together for 10 year and already lived together in our home for 10 years. The best gifts we got were giftcards to wal-mart, target, dinner and cash.

I rather get a $50 giftcard to somewhere i will go and use it then $100 to somewhere I'll feel forced to use or not use at all. I dont groupon

Gift cards are the exact same problem as the Groupon though - in that you should know for sure the people involved will avail themselves of that retailer.

I don't know what I'd do if someone gave me a Walmart gift card, I won't set foot in the place. Hence, cash or an actual gift, imo. Yes, I know people may not like or use an actual gift too but that's different I think. A gift is a gift, giving a gift card is basically cash with a coda.

As for the OP - I'm with the majority with the no groupon, too many people don't like it and they're free to use the $100 on it themselves. The stuff you saw you might buy in Pitt... if they're doing photos wouldn't they already have a photo book deal included in that or planned? And as for restaurants, people are picky. It's funny you say it's hipsterish though, I tend to think of groupon as more of a suburban mom/dad thing than a hipster thing, heh.

 

[dreamin_disney]

Gift cards are the exact same problem as the Groupon though - in that you should know for sure the people involved will avail themselves of that retailer.

I don't know what I'd do if someone gave me a Walmart gift card, I won't set foot in the place. Hence, cash or an actual gift, imo. Yes, I know people may not like or use an actual gift too but that's different I think. A gift is a gift, giving a gift card is basically cash with a coda.

As for the OP - I'm with the majority with the no groupon, too many people don't like it and they're free to use the $100 on it themselves. The stuff you saw you might buy in Pitt... if they're doing photos wouldn't they already have a photo book deal included in that or planned? And as for restaurants, people are picky. It's funny you say it's hipsterish though, I tend to think of groupon as more of a suburban mom/dad thing than a hipster thing, heh.

You're right but we only had close family and friends to our wedding so they know ww or target would be fine with us. I know a lot of people invite distance relatives or friends of the parent so i can see it being harder to know what giftards to buy.

I know sometimes for gift i dont have cash and i really dont know what certain people like but i can charge a giftcard. If i have cash i will give it.

 

[HookedOnDiz]

The couple will be living in Pittsburgh, which is a Groupon town, and I thought it would be a fun way to encourage them to enjoy themselves with the $100 (and they'll get at least $200 worth of value for using it, because of how Groupon works).

This isn't a slam because I know you mean well, but don't try to dictate what they do with your gift. Just give them cash and let the decide whats best for them

 

[sookie]

I don't understand why people ask for opinions and give what their preference is (for instance, in this case, the Groupon), but then come back when the majority by far says "cash" and then hems and haws and says "gosh, that is a lot to think about"... what? a lot to think about? how so?
Either get them a physical gift from the registry or get them cash. It's wedding manners, people.

 

[Pixieflip]

There it is right there...wedding manners. A gift off the registry or cash.

 

[KCMiller]

Wait, so if someone is invited to a wedding, they have to give either a very specific gift that the couple registered for or cash? That's it? Wow, I had no idea that there were laws governing this sort of thing.

I'm just not sensing a lot of love or happiness or appreciation for creativity or gosh, ANYthing positive or joyous from most of these responses. I mean, a lot of you sound absolutely miserable - 'dang it, DH, another wedding invitation - let's drag out the manual. We'd better toe the line or we'll be scoffed at, and isn't that the important thing?'

And I'm not even talking about the Groupon anymore - that ship has sailed. But the mercernary streak in this thread has saddened me, and made me sort of glad I don't personally know a lot of folks who think like this, at least not in person (real people, as opposed to online - y'all know what I mean).

As Mickey is my witness, I vow to encourage my children to accept lovingly whatever anyone wants to give them to celebrate their weddings, and to think of those offerings as GIFTS, not as payback, not as a toll for the reception, not as something to judge and perhaps be snarky about - just as a loving gesture from beloved friends and family as they begin their married lives.

That being said, I'm outta here.

KC

 

[pixiewings71]

There it is right there...wedding manners. A gift off the registry or cash.

No, you aren't required to buy from a registry or just give cash. For years people didn't even have registries! I have two of my best friends getting married in just about 2.5 weeks, we went wine shopping yesterday, DBF and I got them 2 bottles of sparkling wine for them to drink with dinner and for the toast, she told us she didn't want us to give them anything else, just the 2 bottles of wine. They both had complete households before they moved in together so they have pretty much everything they need, I do plan to try to find them a good photo frame but if I can't I'll stick with the wine and they will both be thrilled with that.

 

[MinnieM4]

maybe i am super traditional, but i cannot stand getting just cash or gift cards for gifts. i think that the thought that someone puts into a gift, however bizarre it is, is truly what makes it a "gift" and not just "GIMME MONEY!"

go for it! it is unique, and for the amount of money that people typically get for a wedding, this will not make a huge dent if they cannot "spend it right away" because it isnt cash.

maybe make a nice card with it that says that these are for date nights or something. typically groupon does things like that a lot, dinners and things.

i find that my husband and i never go out to dinner unless we are invited, or receive a groupon as a gift from my mother in law (which we do for birthdays and anni's and stuff)...

go for it!

 

[daisyduck123]

Personally, I would not enjoy that gift. I would rather have the money to do what I want.

I do not care for groupon.

Same here.

I would end up giving it to my mother to use. She would enjoy it.

Just write a check for $100 & be done with it.

 

[kaytieeldr]

This isn't a slam because I know you mean well, but don't try to dictate what they do with your gift. Just give them cash and let the decide whats best for them

But the gift giver "dictates" what the giftee must do with the gift any time it's not cash (and often 'suggests' what should be done when it is: "Put this toward an air conditioner") - just by dint of what the gift is. Have you ever known anyone to say, "Oh, awesome, a blender; now I can iron the sheets right on the bed!"

Wait, so if someone is invited to a wedding, they have to give either a very specific gift that the couple registered for or cash? That's it? Wow, I had no idea that there were laws governing this sort of thing.

Um, no? The registry is a suggestion. It's what the couple wants (or, sometimes, thinks they want or need as determine by seeing everything that store/site offers ).

 

[kaytieeldr]

Same here.

I would end up giving it to my mother to use. She would enjoy it.

Just write a check for $100 & be done with it.

While it's likely the wedding at issue has come and gone... and I'm using this post for convenience only... it's occurred to me how interesting it is that so many people had/have been pushing the OP to spend money she may not have had available for a gift. But she had the Groupon gift card. I know this wasn't the case, but it could have been.

If she had given the gift card, and the couple truly had no use for it, there's always the quoted example: regifting.

 

[MickeyP]

Gift cards are the exact same problem as the Groupon though.

I don't know what I'd do if someone gave me a Walmart gift card, I won't set foot in the place.

I'm sure you don't go to Walmart for a reason and I'm also betting everyone you know, knows why. I find it odd someone wouldn't know what they's d do if they got a GC. You'd either;

1) use it
2) give it away/sell it
3) not use it for whatever reason

I'm not a fan of groupon, so I wouldn't go out of my way to use it (as one would have to) so I'd probably tuck it away with the cards and find it years later... expired.

 

[addicted2dizney]

While it's likely the wedding at issue has come and gone... and I'm using this post for convenience only... it's occurred to me how interesting it is that so many people had/have been pushing the OP to spend money she may not have had available for a gift. But she had the Groupon gift card. I know this wasn't the case, but it could have been.

If she had given the gift card, and the couple truly had no use for it, there's always the quoted example: regifting.

OP had stated she had $100 slated for the gift. Her intentions were if she gave a groupon they would perhaps be able to double this money by using the groupon deals. I think most of the posters were going off OP's $100 gift amount, not asking her to spend more money.

 

[MickeyP]

I just have to share this story.

I got married over 25 years ago. My DH worked with several guys he wanted to invite to our wedding. So, we all know, WHO buys the gift, right? Well, from this particular YOUNG couple, we received a set of old, mmmmm probably not used, but clearly not a modern pattern of wine glasses- 12 of them. I also found a trace of a different patteren of wrapping paper on the bottom of the box. CLEARLY, a re-gift from their wedding- 2 months earlier.
UGLY was the word I was looking for. And CHEAP.

Fast forward, we became great friends and about a year and a half later, she says, "Sorry, we got you such a crappy gift, but we didn't know you guys that well." The gift never came up, she just said this out of the blue. I really didn't know how to respond. DH said I should've said, "That's ok, we threw them out." I didn't say this, because we did throw them out.

 

[Bob NC]

Wait, so if someone is invited to a wedding, they have to give either a very specific gift that the couple registered for or cash? That's it? Wow, I had no idea that there were laws governing this sort of thing.

I think the main theme is a GROUPON is not an appropriate gift for many folks on this board.

"Laws?" LOLOL