What do you think about putting children on a leash?

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Zeebs

DIS Veteran
Joined
Oct 8, 2007
Clearly I fit into the most terrible parent catogory. I cannot watch my two children 100% of the time, I like to look at things when out and about, I have to stop to scratch thus letting go a hand.


Now I have not had to use reins thus far, but I am expecting a new member to the family. I don't have enough hands and if I have to resort to one then I will.

I am just questioning the reason people give a flying fig what other parents do with their children.

You don't like it fine don't do it with your kids, if it makes you feel better to believe you are a better parent for not using them then go for it.

My kids love me despite all the "crappy" parenting decisions I make and they are happy so I will just continue on my merry way.

Kirsten
 

Cosmo.Kramer

The jerk store called...
Joined
Jun 18, 2009
Clearly I fit into the most terrible parent catogory. I cannot watch my two children 100% of the time, I like to look at things when out and about, I have to stop to scratch thus letting go a hand.


Now I have not had to use reins thus far, but I am expecting a new member to the family. I don't have enough hands and if I have to resort to one then I will.

I am just questioning the reason people give a flying fig what other parents do with their children.

You don't like it fine don't do it with your kids, if it makes you feel better to believe you are a better parent for not using them then go for it.

My kids love me despite all the "crappy" parenting decisions I make and they are happy so I will just continue on my merry way.

Kirsten
I wouldn't worry - I fall into that category as well. :rotfl2:

I takes my child on trips to WDW, care for her, feed her and treat her to toys every so often, but so help me! She steps out of line and the monkey goes on the back! :hippie:
 

ampc3

DIS Veteran
Joined
Aug 7, 2006
I think it is horrible to put a child on a leash, I have 2 kids and if they run off or wander away its my fault for not watching, if they are a runner or wanderer that is because I raised them that way and let them get away with it. I know I will get thats kids being kids or you cant watch them every second of the day and other flames but if my child ran/wandered or was uncontrollable that I had to put a device that is used on an animal on them to control and watch them I would look in the mirror.
I wasn't going to respond to this thread, b/c I think it is silly.. parent's have to do what they think is best.. don't judge others , you usually don't know the whole story!

but reading that specific comment got to me and is just plain ignorant IMHO
my DHs brother when they were little, were standing on a busy street corner (in chicago ) HOLDING his father's hand waiting for the walk signal.
When only God knows why he did this, his brother yanked his hand away from his father and darted into the middle of an oncoming car, also in front of his mother and himself HOLDING his mother's hand, and died 2 days later of internal bleeding, he was only 7~ so to judge and say it is the PARENTS fault if you have a runner b/c YOU ALLOWED it , is crazy... and rude.

That all happened in a blink of an eye!
 

TraceyL

Always planning........
Joined
Nov 7, 1999
Never heard safety reins called a 'leash' before - they certainly aren't called that over here :confused3
Suppose the nickname conjures up a certain image & that contributes to the strong views.
 

JDUCKY

Local Yocal
Joined
Dec 13, 2008
Not at all. The comment that larryz found ironic was indeed very ironic. It was clear ducky wasn't talking about safety at all, but about control when he said "strap them in":



His backpeddling after getting called out on it was pretty politician-like, though. ;)



I haven't chimed in with my own thoughts, yet, and only read the first and last couple of pages, so I'm sorry if I'm repeating anything. I am also one who thought leashes/tethers were ridiculous when I had just one child. My mellow child. :rotfl:

When I had my second, I realized why so many parents use them. By one year old, she could run faster than me, and since she was tiny enough to run directly under tables, handrails, squeeze between people, she could easily be gone in seconds flat. She could wiggle out of the five-point stroller harness and climb out in the blink of an eye as well.

We got a tether for her. It gave her more independance and freedom than the stroller or holding hands did, and it sure saved me many a backache. I'm only 5'4", but my hands are still too high for a toddler to hold without me walking around bent to one side, and the toddler's arm straight up over her head. Talk about uncomfortable for both of us!

As for the people who say "no one used them when I was a kid", just how old are you, exactly? My mom used one on my brother in the early 60's, and I remember seeing them most of my life. She had a picture of her own mom using one with her sister in the 1940's, and I've also read that they were commonly used in the early 20th century, though called walking reins at that time. So maybe your parents didn't feel you needed one, but obviously other parents did, and have for a long time. Not that that even means anything. My mom's car didn't have seat belts when I was a kid, but I don't think anyone here would think that was a good argument against installing seat belts in cars today.
*shaking head in disbelief*
 

Planogirl

I feel the nerd in me stirring
Joined
Aug 11, 2000
Never heard safety reins called a 'leash' before - they certainly aren't called that over here :confused3
Suppose the nickname conjures up a certain image & that contributes to the strong views.
I think that you make a good point. It's all a matter of perception isn't it?
 

Dan Murphy

We are family.
Joined
Apr 20, 2000
The thread title here caught my eye, LOL. It reminds me of when I came to the DIS, back in early '99, another DIS'er, Snoopy, now gone from here :sad2::sad1: had a trip report in which she discussed having her toddler (now a teenager) on a leash. I have not read this thread here, but by the looks of it with the number pages, I would say it is similar to Snoopy's, lots of 'viewpoints', lots of opinions, LOL. :lmao: When I talk with Snoopy, I still reminder of that, as well as her double stroller from hell experience in AK, :lmao::laughing::laughing:

Miss ya, Snoop.
 
  • Mouse House Mama

    Luckiest Mommy in the World!!!
    Joined
    Aug 28, 2004
    I do not like leashes for children at all. If you want to use one that is your business but I will say that every single kid I have seen on a leash is accompanied by innattentive parents. The parents are always looking the other way and not even paying attention to the kid. I always say to myself if that kid wasn't on the leash those parents wouldn't have a clue where the kid was. :sad2: Now I know there will be a barage of parents here who say that they don't do that etc. but that is what I have seen every single time without exception. Do I care if you use one? No, it's none of my business- but I can still have my own thoughts on them.

    One thing though that nobody ever answers when these threads come up is what do you do when your alleged "runner" decides to take off when they have the leash on? Do they strain against it? Do you pull up on it? Do you have a retractable one and let them run 20 feet until someone gets tripped up in it and risk everyone involved getting hurt? I don't get how putting a lead line on a child who will not stand next to you will suddenly make them walk like a little angel. I am really curious about the theory behind that.
     

    JDUCKY

    Local Yocal
    Joined
    Dec 13, 2008
    I do not like leashes for children at all. If you want to use one that is your business but I will say that every single kid I have seen on a leash is accompanied by innattentive parents. The parents are always looking the other way and not even paying attention to the kid. I always say to myself if that kid wasn't on the leash those parents wouldn't have a clue where the kid was. :sad2: Now I know there will be a barage of parents here who say that they don't do that etc. but that is what I have seen every single time without exception. Do I care if you use one? No, it's none of my business- but I can still have my own thoughts on them.

    One thing though that nobody ever answers when these threads come up is what do you do when your alleged "runner" decides to take off when they have the leash on? Do they strain against it? Do you pull up on it? Do you have a retractable one and let them run 20 feet until someone gets tripped up in it and risk everyone involved getting hurt? I don't get how putting a lead line on a child who will not stand next to you will suddenly make them walk like a little angel. I am really curious about the theory behind that.

    Their reasoning is that it gives little Johnny or little Janie the ability to exert their independence and be free to explore!

    hogwash

    A crowded theme park is NOT the place to let the little angels explore about. And what independence are they gaining by walking away 10-20 feet? How are they learning discipline by being allow to start walking away from mom/dad? How rude is it to have other visitors tripping over those little angels (and the leash)?

    Sad.


    Want to let them run about and explore, take them to a playground or a city park where they can be watched easily.
     
  • Planogirl

    I feel the nerd in me stirring
    Joined
    Aug 11, 2000
    The thread title here caught my eye, LOL. It reminds me of when I came to the DIS, back in early '99, another DIS'er, Snoopy, now gone from here :sad2::sad1: had a trip report in which she discussed having her toddler (now a teenager) on a leash. I have not read this thread here, but by the looks of it with the number pages, I would say it is similar to Snoopy's, lots of 'viewpoints', lots of opinions, LOL. :lmao: When I talk with Snoopy, I still reminder of that, as well as her double stroller from hell experience in AK, :lmao::laughing::laughing:

    Miss ya, Snoop.
    :)
     

    kathy884

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Sep 26, 2009
    Parents put children in a leash or harness for safety reasons. Some children (not every child) at certain ages are quite compulsive and inquisitive and think it's fun to explore and don't stay with parents when told to do so. For us we had a period when this was the case. If it weren't for the leash or harness, we would have needed to stay home and not go to large pubic places with our child. With the leash, there were lots of fun things we could do with our child that we wouldn't have been able to do otherwise. These inquisitive kids want to explore, don't want to be in a stroller / prefer to be walking much of the time, will eventually learn that it is important for safety reasons to stay with mom and dad, but just haven't learned that yet. It's not that mom and dad aren't trying to teach this. Different children learn things at different paces. Some children know things intuitively that other children need to learn.

    I bet the people who are critical of this practice never had this experience with one of their own dear children -- watching a child at a department store like a hawk, never taking your eyes off of them, chasing them (being less than a foot away from them with your eyes right on them when you loose them), having them duck under some metal bars you can't get under and under various clothes racks in a store and loosing them for 15 minutes (which seemed like a lifetime) // Getting Security and others in the store looking for the child // child finally found crawling in dressing rooms when woman changing clothes screams when child crawls into her room. This is the personal experience that I had that got me to buy a baby leash. After this happened, I purchased one the very next day, and I'm not exactly sure how long I used it (my son is 14 now), but I think I used it for six months to a year or so. My parents used one for my brother back in the 60s for a period of time too, and they were/are wonderful parents.

    It was great when my darling child changed into someone who knew he should stay with mommy and daddy, who would stay where we told him to if we had to look away for a minute, and who could identify people that work for a store and would have the ability to tell someone his full name, address, and phone number if for some unforseen reason we would be separated.

    I say don't judge others if you haven't walked in their shoes.
     

    disneyjunkie

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Mar 2, 2001
    One thing though that nobody ever answers when these threads come up is what do you do when your alleged "runner" decides to take off when they have the leash on? Do they strain against it? Do you pull up on it? Do you have a retractable one and let them run 20 feet until someone gets tripped up in it and risk everyone involved getting hurt? I don't get how putting a lead line on a child who will not stand next to you will suddenly make them walk like a little angel. I am really curious about the theory behind that.

    As I read this I thought about a Kat Williams skit about kids and leashes. It's not PC and I'm sure many would be offended so I won't post a link.


    I'm still wondering how you keep a leash on an older child. All of the cute ones have claps in the front. A child that wants to run off can just unlock the darn thing and bolt.:confused3
     

    aspen37

    Changes In Latitudes, Changes In Attitudes.
    Joined
    Dec 28, 2006
    This thread was on the DIS Boards podcast and thought I would check it out.
    I'm glad more people are using the safety harness w/leash in the parks. I was with a friend who brought just the wrist to wrist kind for one of her sons, but was not wearing it. We were standing and talking at DTD when he disappeared! He was standing next to me one minute and gone the next. We ran around looking for him and calling him. He heard us but did come over to us. After about 5 to 8 minutes of stress we found him. She used the leash for the rest of our stay at DTD. He was not happy about it, but he loves to run off and hide. Many years ago I thought the leash for kinds was crazy, then I realized they are a great tool to keep kids safe. And anyway who am I to judge other people and what makes them feel safe with their kids. This is just my opinion.
     

    KPeveler

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Dec 17, 2006
    I am sure that my potentially using a safety harness will be least of my problems when it comes to other people judging my parenting skills! :rotfl: :lmao:

    I am a young woman in a powerchair married to another woman, and I will be the "stay at home mom." I expect to find enough problems with people judging me, so I think the leash will be the least of my problems!
     

    JDUCKY

    Local Yocal
    Joined
    Dec 13, 2008
    This thread was on the DIS Boards podcast and thought I would check it out.
    I'm glad more people are using the safety harness w/leash in the parks. I was with a friend who brought just the wrist to wrist kind for one of her sons, but was not wearing it. We were standing and talking at DTD when he disappeared! He was standing next to me one minute and gone the next. We ran around looking for him and calling him. He heard us but did come over to us. After about 5 to 8 minutes of stress we found him. She used the leash for the rest of our stay at DTD. He was not happy about it, but he loves to run off and hide. Many years ago I thought the leash for kinds was crazy, then I realized they are a great tool to keep kids safe. And anyway who am I to judge other people and what makes them feel safe with their kids. This is just my opinion.
    ah...inattentiveness.


    Seems to be the most common cause (that and a lack of willingness on parents to actually enforce discipline and be a parent instead of wanting to be a playmate/friend to their child)
     

    kathy884

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Sep 26, 2009
    I saw some posts about wander off husbands and had to laugh as that describes mine. My solution is that I make sure that I am the one with the rental car keys. That means my husband has to find me and the kids rather than me and the kids having to find him. Works out sooo much better / so much less stress on me.
     

    Zeebs

    DIS Veteran
    Joined
    Oct 8, 2007
    ah...inattentiveness.


    Seems to be the most common cause (that and a lack of willingness on parents to actually enforce discipline and be a parent instead of wanting to be a playmate/friend to their child)


    People are people. I am glad you can watch your children 100% of the time, and clearly nothing has ever happened to them no bumps, cuts, trips to hospital, etc. Excellent. What a great parent you are. I suppose you are able to enforce discipline as well without yelling, smacking, and all the other stuff that all the "good" parents can do.

    I am just a Mum who tries her best. I discipline my children (but also probably would end up on a Dis board thread for having to gall to do it at Disney of all places)

    If you want to judge me for my methods of parenting go ahead I don't care I learned a long time ago you can't please everyone especially people that don't even know me.

    Kirsten
     

    JDUCKY

    Local Yocal
    Joined
    Dec 13, 2008
    People are people. I am glad you can watch your children 100% of the time, and clearly nothing has ever happened to them no bumps, cuts, trips to hospital, etc. Excellent. What a great parent you are. I suppose you are able to enforce discipline as well without yelling, smacking, and all the other stuff that all the "good" parents can do.

    I am just a Mum who tries her best. I discipline my children (but also probably would end up on a Dis board thread for having to gall to do it at Disney of all places)

    If you want to judge me for my methods of parenting go ahead I don't care I learned a long time ago you can't please everyone especially people that don't even know me.

    Kirsten
    My girls have had plenty of scrapes and bumps and bruises. I was never afraid to spare the rod. I didn't beat them, of course, but a swat on a diapered butt or a smack on the hand got their attention and they learned. That's how discipline is instilled. They need to know that crossing boundaries will have consequences.

    I also know that I, as the parent, have the responsibility of making sure my kids stay within my sight and don't wander off. I made sure they didn't pick up something off the ground and eat it. I made sure they knew to stay quiet in a movie theater (or else I'd leave so as not to annoy others). You see, I taught my children to respect others and to know what their boundaries were.

    I was a .... parent.


    Going, "Oh, no, Johnny. Please don't do that." will only result in the child ignoring the parent and continuing to do what they want. Why not? There's no consequence in it for them!


    edit: And what's making it worse these days is the ever-present cell phone. Can't tell you how many times I've seen a parent busy talking on the phone or texting someone while the children were running to and fro or doing something that they would normally be disciplined for.
     
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