What are you thoughts on same sex schools? UPDATE POST 64

[mommasita]

My DD has been testing this past month, only one more to go, phew, for High School. There is one in particular that is a fantastic school, one of the top 20 in the country, and it is all Girl. This is the school we REALLY would love to see her in. After attending the open house, we were even more impressed. DD also is in love with it. We get the results online Nov 18th and midnight.

However, isn't there always one , some members of our family have their opinions. Now, it is NOT their child, so really NOTB, but I do appreciate opinions, and weigh what people say, IF it is said in the right manner. They don't agree on the same sex issue, implying basically that "Girls go wild" after HS. Now, I went to a public Co Ed HS, and saw plenty going wild there. I don't think you need the same sex issue for that.

They have monthly dances with a local all boy HS, and obviously have members of the opposite sex as friends. They would not socialize on a daily basis, as in CoED schooling.

I just wonder what others think?

 

[mamacatnv]

I know there have been a lot of studies about how boys and girls learn differently and how separating the sexes for educational purposes can really benefit girls, especially in the maths and sciences.
However, I think you are referring more to the things that your DD could perhaps miss out on by attending an all girl school.

I went to a co-ed public school so I have no first hand knowledge. I also have a son who is a Jr in college and let me just tell you that college Freshman regardless of where they went to high school have a tendency to go a bit "wild" when out from under their parents thumb.

If I had the opportunity to get my child into a great school that she wanted to attend that I could afford and that would offer her an excellent education then I would go for it. Good luck, I hope your DD gets what she wants.
If your DD did not want to go that IMO would be a totally different discussion but heck, if she wants it go for it!

 

[WebmasterMaryJo]

I know quite a few girls that went to an all-girls school, and for the most part they love it. These are girls who graduated a few years ago to last year. They tell me that they don't have to worry about dressing up for boys, they don't care about make-up, etc., and they enjoy the school. They also concentrate more on their studies.

They didn't miss out on sports games/dances because they did have mixers/socials, etc., with the nearby boys' shool.

They're doing quite well. The younger sister of one of these girls told her parents that an all-girls school wasn't for her, and she is going to a co-ed school.

 

[mommasita]

Thank you very much.

At the open house the other evening at the Co Ed HS my son goes to, and the one she would more than likely attend as well, if this does not pan out, I asked the Director why we would chose his school over an other. His response " Well, your daughter would have equal opportunity that boys have here"
My response, " I would like my daughter to have EVERY opportunity boys have here!" He was , and had no banter for that.

Yes, I am referring more to that. I think that I have read and seen enough lately to absolutely clarify (to me) that the education she would receive at this school, would outweigh many of the others. She has a drive, and If we can insure that she is challenged, we believe it is to her benefit.

I do believe that a great amount of children, either sex, do go wild, and honestly don't think that has anything to do with being in a same sex school. That is my belief, and I could be really far off.

Also, we are fortunate that this is on the lower end for private HS's around. Some others have great reports, but are TOTALLY out of our budget, so no bother testing there.

 

[mommasita]

I know quite a few girls that went to an all-girls school, and for the most part they love it. These are girls who graduated a few years ago to last year. They tell me that they don't have to worry about dressing up for boys, they don't care about make-up, etc., and they enjoy the school. They also concentrate more on their studies.

They didn't miss out on sports games/dances because they did have mixers/socials, etc., with the nearby boys' shool.

They're doing quite well. The younger sister of one of these girls told her parents that an all-girls school wasn't for her, and she is going to a co-ed school.

You hit on an excellent point, and one I have mentioned at home quite a few times. I know that social interaction is extremely important, but when it comes between your schoolwork, I think the opposite sex is a definite distraction for many, not all, but many. I know it was for me a few times. I also can remember not wanting to answer things, for fear the boys would laugh at me, etc, etc.
All our HS's are uniform, regardless of private or public, so that is a non issue. I just love the mentality of this school. The more I hear, the more I like. It is extremely strict. They are not allowed off campus at lunch, they can roam ON IT, but not leave the grounds, NO makeup EVER, small earrings, clear polish, etc, etc.

 

[ilovepcot]

I went to private school (boarding school actually) grades 9-12. First year off at school was an all girls school. I did *far better* in an all girl environment that co-ed. I was one of the people who was easily distracted by the opposite sex.

 

[superme80]

I was homeschooled for high school so it was just my sister and myself. I did wonderful. I was not distracted with boys like I was in jr. high. I say go for it!

 

[Diznygrl]

I went to an all-girl high school and loved it. Like others have said, even though you're not going to school with boys, there are still PLENTY of opportunities to interact and socialize with them. Dances, theater, band, sports, etc. It's not like you're hidden away and forbidden access to members of the opposite sex for 4 years. It was wonderful to go about the school day without being distracted by all that drama that can occur in a co-ed environment. I loved not having to fuss over hair and makeup because I was worried about how some boy would view me. You could even go without shaving your legs, and nobody cared!


I think if a girl has it in her to "go wild", she's going to do it whether she went to an all-girl school or not.

 

[SydSim]

I attended an all-girls, academic magnet high school for both 9th and 10th grades. I absolutely loved the sisterhood environment. Personally, it seemed as if we were all pulling for each other to succeed, not competing for a boy's attention (or shying away from showing our intelligence in front of them). At an all-girls' school, the student body president, vp, secretary and treasurer are ALL GIRLS! How empowering is that?

That being said, I attended a public co-ed high school for 11th and 12th grades. It wasn't a magnet school, but I was in the honors classes, so the academic focus was similar. TOTALLY DIFFERENT! More focus on boy/girl stuff. Definite "role" assignments (self-imposed), such as who ran for what position, etc.

I didn't go wild when I left the all-girls school. I was actually quite calm and focused. I did, on the other hand, attend college with kids who had attended co-ed high schools who were going wild!


I highly recommend same-sex, educational environments for girls. Can't ya tell?

 

[Deon.Newmankgyxc]

i dont the same sex schools

 

[mhsjax]

I attended an all-girls, academic magnet high school for both 9th and 10th grades. I absolutely loved the sisterhood environment. Personally, it seemed as if we were all pulling for each other to succeed, not competing for a boy's attention (or shying away from showing our intelligence in front of them). At an all-girls' school, the student body president, vp, secretary and treasurer are ALL GIRLS! How empowering is that?

That being said, I attended a public co-ed high school for 11th and 12th grades. It wasn't a magnet school, but I was in the honors classes, so the academic focus was similar. TOTALLY DIFFERENT! More focus on boy/girl stuff. Definite "role" assignments (self-imposed), such as who ran for what position, etc.

I didn't go wild when I left the all-girls school. I was actually quite calm and focused. I did, on the other hand, attend college with kids who had attended co-ed high schools who were going wild!


I highly recommend same-sex, educational environments for girls. Can't ya tell?

I guess I just don't get it. If you have to go to an all girls school so you won't be focused on boys, then what do you do in college, what do you do when you get a job. Seems to me that on a Dis board filled with such it up and learn how to deal with stuff, that this is going against the grain.

I also don't understand this dumbing down because of boys. Some of the popular girls where the ones with a brain.

I would never let a boy dictate what I did and neither does my DD. So in short, I wouldn't let my DD go to an all girls school, she need to learn to deal with distraction, if there was any for her, and I don't think there will be.

 

[WhateverLolaWants]

I'm a graduate of an all girls school (went there from 8th grade through senior year). Everything is so low key, drama wasn't that high, and for the most part everyone got along because there was no such thing as cool and uncool girls. I don't know if this is just my imagination, but I think we grow out of the pettiness quicker than our co-ed counterparts. I'm 25 now, and I am amazed at how females who went to co-ed schools treat each other in adulthood.

The best part of all girls schools is only having to shave your knees since knee socks and skirts cover the rest.

 

[mhsjax]

I'm a graduate of an all girls school (went there from 8th grade through senior year). Everything is so low key, drama wasn't that high, and for the most part everyone got along because there was no such thing as cool and uncool girls. I don't know if this is just my imagination, but I think we grow out of the pettiness quicker than our co-ed counterparts. I'm 25 now, and I am amazed at how females who went to co-ed schools treat each other in adulthood.

The best part of all girls schools is only having to shave your knees since knee socks and skirts cover the rest.

Just in case you were not kidding about the shaving part. And as I read the whole thread, I see another post about not having to shave. Geez. I am sorry but no wonder some need an all girls school. If you are that concerned about a boy seeing your unshaved legs then yes there is a problem. You should shave or not shave for yourself not for anyone else. it matter I shave because I like the way my legs feel with no nasty stubble, not because of some guy. Sorry, but I have an image of a bunch of girls running around without shaving wild ugly hair and no makeup, all because of boys. I hate to think that girls out there only want to look nice because of boys. Sorry but that is the way SOME, not all of these posts are sounding.

I also don't buy into the co-ed being a cause of pettiness. you see it long before boys are involved. I see girls as young as 1st grade starting this.

As anyone cal tell, I am against same sex schools. I think people need to have enough self respect and discipline to not care what boys think and not be distracted by them. There will always be distractions, you need to learn to deal with them.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

I think they are awesome. We have tons of all boy Catholic schools here and a few all girls schools.

In the end, it does not matter. I do not understand your inlaws line of thinking. They are just making up stuff I think.

 

[luvsJack]

well, hopefully once you are in college or in the work force you are a bit too old for high school drama! I can certainly see how not having that factor would help someone be sucessful in school and it would certainly teach a girl how to forge close friendships and be supportive of other girls. No competition for a boy's affection going on.

Just from an outsiders observation, the young college kids that go wild are the ones whose parents tried to keep complete control over thier child. We see the girls who were never allowed to date in high school suddenly start hanging on a different boy every couple of days, we see the kids that were never allowed to go out with friends suddenly out partying every night. For these kids there is a certain amount of freedom that happens upon entering college, suddenly no one is keeping tabs on where you are, no one is checking your grades or making sure you get to school at 8--so many do "go wild" and have a HORRIBLE first semester and then they level out and it all works out.

 

[chicagodisneyfan]

Just in case you were not kidding about the shaving part. Why does it matter if boys aren't around, don't you do stuff, (shaving) for yourself also. I never understood this. I shave because I like the way my legs feel with no nasty stubble, not because of some guy.

I also don't buy into the co-ed being a cause of pettiness. you see it long before boys are involved. I see girls as young as 1st grade starting this.

As anyone cal tell, I am against same sex schools. I think people need to have enough self respect and discipline to not care what boys think and not be distracted by them. There will always be distractions, you need to learn to deal with them.

Since you do not appear to be knowledgeable in this area, I would suggest some research.

There are single sex BOY schools too!

It has nothing to do with self discipline and respect and how incredibly narrow minded that you think so. It simply has to do with what is the best environment for learning. For some it may be a coed school, for others a single sex.

OP - I say go for it - the school you are looking at sounds like something your daughter will love.

 

[mhsjax]

You hit on an excellent point, and one I have mentioned at home quite a few times. I know that social interaction is extremely important, but when it comes between your schoolwork, I think the opposite sex is a definite distraction for many, not all, but many. I know it was for me a few times. I also can remember not wanting to answer things, for fear the boys would laugh at me, etc, etc.
All our HS's are uniform, regardless of private or public, so that is a non issue. I just love the mentality of this school. The more I hear, the more I like. It is extremely strict. They are not allowed off campus at lunch, they can roam ON IT, but not leave the grounds, NO makeup EVER, small earrings, clear polish, etc, etc.

Sorry but no school would ever tell me or my DD that I couldn't wear makeup, especially in a public school. I don't think that would even be legal.

 

[The Mystery Machine]

Sorry but no school would ever tell me or my DD that I couldn't wear makeup, especially in a public school. I don't think that would even be legal.

Well then my dd's are going to the wrong school.

How about the other side where they are looked down on because they DO NOT wear makeup.


Double edged sword, you know.

 

[mhsjax]

Since you do not appear to be knowledgeable in this area, I would suggest some research.

There are single sex BOY schools too!

It has nothing to do with self discipline and respect and how incredibly narrow minded that you think so. It simply has to do with what is the best environment for learning. For some it may be a coed school, for others a single sex.

OP - I say go for it - the school you are looking at sounds like something your daughter will love.

I know that there are single sex boys school. Where did I ever sat that there weren't. If you look at the posts it does appear that it has to do with discipline and respect. Sorry, but that is the way I feel. And yes I do know girls that went to all girls school. They didn't like it and it CRAZY after school. Yet my friends that went to co-ed schools with me, we were not boy crazy, I friend of mine is actually a Judge, shocking because we can't let boys think we are smart.

I say if you don't have any good school around and the single sex school is them go for it, but to use it as a crutch to not have to deal with the opposite sex is wrong.

 

[mhsjax]

Well then my dd's are going to the wrong school.

How about the other side where they are looked down on because they DO NOT wear makeup.


Double edged sword, you know.

I don't think it should be either way, I know girls that wear make up in HS and they are very well thought of and I know girls that don't, they are also very well thought of. Neither group has a problem with fitting in and some of the girls in BOTH groups are equally popular and run with the good kids.

As far as the wrong school, I don't know, but everyday that I read stuff here on the Dis, makes me so very thankful that I live where I do and my kids go to the schools that they do. Maybe I have a jaded view of things because of this. And no kid should be looked down upon because of what they choose to wear or not wear.