Well this takes the cake....I give up.

How rude & your sil doesn't know how to shop!!!! I could easily find things for $25.00 for my kids. Usually mine get $10/GC and we could still find something for that too.
 
For all of you that are saying $25 is plenty and there are tons of things they could buy for that amount, I think you are missing the point. It doesn't matter if the OP sent those kids $25 or $5. The OP took time to come up with something for these kids and gave an amount she was comfortable with giving. If it had only been $5, so be it. It truly is the thought that counts and this point went right over the SIL head.

Honestly, you are a better person than me because I would respond and it would not be pretty. The amount you gave is irrelevant. The rudeness is what I find unacceptable.
Oh I think most posters would agree with you that ANY amount should be accepted gracefully and gratefully (I know i do). I think the reason many pointed out that there is a lot you could get for $25 (it is the reason I did) is, per the OP, the obnoxious sister actually has the OP second guessing the amount and wondering i you really cannot get much or that (see bolded below).
Little background, DF was laid off in April right as I finished school. We relocated here for a job for me, and he recently started working. So we basically had no income for 6 months and had to live off savings and then credit cards and we are now paying both rent and a mortgage. Financially we are not in a great place right now but we are getting by, which we are greatful for. Darling SIL sent me an email today regarding the gifts we sent for Christmas to her kids. I just want to pull my hair out. We sent each child a $25 gift card to Toys R Us so they could choose their own toy. This sis complains each year no matter what we get her kids, but here is a bit of the email I got from her this am. I am really hurt & offended. Is $25 not enough? I dont even know how to respond, I dont think I am going to. What is the going rate for a gift card for a child that is under 8?

Quote from the email:

I wanted to thank you for the gift cards, but just wanted to let you know since you do not have any children you must be unaware that $25 is really not enough for a toy. Thank you for thinking of us, it really is the though that counts. They will be able to save them and put them toward something, we will cover the rest. Merry Christmas.
 
I'm sorry your SIL responded in the manner that she did. However you choose to respond, or not respond, I hope you have a Merry Christmas and that 2011 will be a wonderful year for you and your DF (DH?). :santa:

BTW - I think crazy sometimes skips around in families. The stories I could tell about my family. :dance3:We're a small group in my family that's not crazy. We tend to stick together and ignore the rest.

Best of luck to you!! :goodvibes
 
DH and I budget $25 per niece/nephews for birthdays and Christmas. We could easily spend more but feel they should be able to get something nice for this amount and they get many other gifts. I think your gift was fine and that your SIL was completely ungrateful.

Honestly, this would be the last gift that anyone in that household would receive from me and DF would be responsible for responding to his sister on why this was the case.

Have a Merry Christmas and don't let this get to you...
 

Hold on there a minute, not everyone agrees. I think SIL has a point as OP clearly did not put enough thought into what is clearly the perfect gift for these children. See my previous post, because I think the answer is quite obvious.

OP, I'm very relieved you still have a good amount of time before Christmas to correct your gaffe!

We were posting at the same time. ;)
 
WOW! I am just amazed at your SIL. I can't imagine what she's teaching those children of hers. YIKES! Like others have said, $25 is MORE than generous. I'm sorry you have to deal with those inlaws.

Have a very Merry Christmas with your family!
 
Im a bit flabbergasted at your sis. I have 3 brothers and sisters and between the 4 of us, we have 12 kids. It was getting ridiculous the amount of gifts they were getting each year so 3 years ago we started "secret santa:. Each family buys for 3 kids with a $25-$30 limit. The kids are thrilled, the parents are happy and it just makes Christmas more about the season than the gifts.

We've never had an issue with the price and most importantly, we take the opportunity to teach our kids its not about WHAT you get!

To think that a sister would send that kind of acknowledgement to a gift that not only came from the heart, but was sacrificed for, while thinking about HER children is beyond me! My best thoughts to you! Im thankful when someone thinks of my kids and makes them a batch of cookies!
 
I totally agree.

I would actually respond and ask for the gift cards back.

"Dear SIL,

I'm sorry that I underspent. If you will return the gift cards to me, I'll give it another try and send something more appropriate. There's still plenty of time before Christmas Eve. Thanks!"

If she actually does send them back, go to Toys R Us and spend them on toys for Toys for Tots (you can get a lot for $25). Make a list of all the toys you were able to purchase for children who would, otherwise, not have a Christmas and send it, with some home-baked cookies or handmade something, to the kids with a note that says:

"I got a note from your mom earlier this month and it helped me see that this year, with money so tight around the country, it would be most meaningful to make my holiday gifts for family and friends and to donate the money I normally would have spent to help provide gifts for kids in the community who would otherwise have nothing to open on Christmas morning. I have, therefore, donated $25 to Toys for Tots in each of your names. I hope you enjoy the homemade gifts I've sent as well as the priceless joy that your donation will give a needy child. Merry Christmas!"

I don't think a gesture like this punishes the kids, particularly if you send it along with something inexpensive that you've made that speaks directly to each kids' interests. Besides ... they're under 8. They won't be scarred for life. And -- if there are still Christmas miracles out there -- maybe your SIL will finally "get it". Not only will she see how much you can actually get for $25, but she will be trumped in the "Christmas spirit" department. She may never admit it, but she'll know.

:earsboy:

I really love this idea:thumbsup2
 
:eek:

That's just SHOCKING! W T F?
Her behaviour is horrendous! I would be pissed if I got an email like that! I'm so offended for you!

First of all, $25 is wonderfully generous for a child that age! My son would be THRILLED with that. We have so many people to buy for and a tight budget that I spend aboud $25 each on my niece and two nephews and a grand total of $10 on each of my small cousins and they are always so thankful and happy. These kids aren't dirt poor or anything, they've just learned to be thankful and appreciative. I shudder to think what your SIL's kids will be like as her values and attitude rub off on them as they get older.

I would absolutely call her out on her terribly rude behavior. I'm sorry but people like her should NOT be allowed to bully in that passive aggressive way. If it were me, I'd respond with something like "Hmmm, actually, all my friends with children thought that less was appropriate for a child that age but I wanted to spend a little extra. I looked in the TRU store and there were hundreds of things for much less than that. I'm sorry you feel it isn't enough but I find your comment rude and offensive. Merry Christmas."
 
I can't believe how rude and ungrateful that is. $25 is plenty for a child or an adult for that matter, especially given your situation.

good grief!
 
I would send a note to SIL and suggest that she teach the kids a lesson of charity and have them try to pick up as many gifts as they each can with their $25 gift card to donate to Toys for Tots since there isn't anything that they would want for themselves in that price range.
 
Little background, DF was laid off in April right as I finished school. We relocated here for a job for me, and he recently started working. So we basically had no income for 6 months and had to live off savings and then credit cards and we are now paying both rent and a mortgage. Financially we are not in a great place right now but we are getting by, which we are greatful for. Darling SIL sent me an email today regarding the gifts we sent for Christmas to her kids. I just want to pull my hair out. We sent each child a $25 gift card to Toys R Us so they could choose their own toy. This sis complains each year no matter what we get her kids, but here is a bit of the email I got from her this am. I am really hurt & offended. Is $25 not enough? I dont even know how to respond, I dont think I am going to. What is the going rate for a gift card for a child that is under 8?

Quote from the email:

I wanted to thank you for the gift cards, but just wanted to let you know since you do not have any children you must be unaware that $25 is really not enough for a toy. Thank you for thinking of us, it really is the though that counts. They will be able to save them and put them toward something, we will cover the rest. Merry Christmas.

$25 is more than enough to buy a nice gift for a child (or adult) of any age. In my family, we budget $25 for the niece/nephew gifts. BUT, we go one step further!!!! HORRORS! We don't give gifts to each one!! We draw names! Boy are we cheap. :lmao: We also have a $25 limit on the adult gift exchange. I've never had a problem finding something nice and heartfelt for that.

Don't give her another moment's thought, except to go out and find that book on etiquette you can send as her gift. Make sure you find one on a clearance rack and leave the price tag on!!!
 
Wow, what a rude... I can't think of a polite word.

$25 is plenty for anyone.
 
I totally agree.

I would actually respond and ask for the gift cards back.

"Dear SIL,

I'm sorry that I underspent. If you will return the gift cards to me, I'll give it another try and send something more appropriate. There's still plenty of time before Christmas Eve. Thanks!"

If she actually does send them back, go to Toys R Us and spend them on toys for Toys for Tots (you can get a lot for $25). Make a list of all the toys you were able to purchase for children who would, otherwise, not have a Christmas and send it, with some home-baked cookies or handmade something, to the kids with a note that says:

"I got a note from your mom earlier this month and it helped me see that this year, with money so tight around the country, it would be most meaningful to make my holiday gifts for family and friends and to donate the money I normally would have spent to help provide gifts for kids in the community who would otherwise have nothing to open on Christmas morning. I have, therefore, donated $25 to Toys for Tots in each of your names. I hope you enjoy the homemade gifts I've sent as well as the priceless joy that your donation will give a needy child. Merry Christmas!"

I don't think a gesture like this punishes the kids, particularly if you send it along with something inexpensive that you've made that speaks directly to each kids' interests. Besides ... they're under 8. They won't be scarred for life. And -- if there are still Christmas miracles out there -- maybe your SIL will finally "get it". Not only will she see how much you can actually get for $25, but she will be trumped in the "Christmas spirit" department. She may never admit it, but she'll know.

:earsboy:

I like this idea, but would probably substitute a couple of children's books about good manners instead of the homemade items. If their mother is this unappreciative, the children will need to learn graciousness elsewhere. Twenty-five dollar GCs are nice gifts and most children would be thrilled to get them.
 
OP I am upset for you just reading this.

My kids get $25 gift cards from their aunts and uncles and they are THRILLED!!! It is more than enough, it is very much appreciated, and they always always find something they want.

I don't know what kind of person sends an email like that. I am just floored.
whether you have a 6 figure income or a 4 figure income, those gift cards were perfectly fine for those kids.
heck my kids are even thrilled when someone puts a $5 bill in a card for them, and guess what they can even find a toy for $5!!!!!!!!

I don't know what I would do, but I think my snarkiness would really be rearing its ugly head very quickly.

:hug::hug:
 
This is a truly, truly a case for me of just when I think I've heard it all.

Your SIL (is she your brother's wife, or your husband's sister?) is beyond rude....as others have said, I can't type what word best describes her here. :o

I do feel for the kids, but I have a feeling that the kids have probably already picked up on this type of behavior from the their mother, and that's unfortunate. In any case, I sincerely hope you will not offer up any gifts of any kind in the future for any member of that family. They don't deserve them.
 


Disney Vacation Planning. Free. Done for You.
Our Authorized Disney Vacation Planners are here to provide personalized, expert advice, answer every question, and uncover the best discounts. Let Dreams Unlimited Travel take care of all the details, so you can sit back, relax, and enjoy a stress-free vacation.
Start Your Disney Vacation
Disney EarMarked Producer






DIS Facebook DIS youtube DIS Instagram DIS Pinterest DIS Tiktok DIS Twitter

Add as a preferred source on Google

Back
Top Bottom