Wedding disaster

[Shleedogg]

OP I am so sorry your family is having to deal with this. How deceitful of the banquet manager. I have to wonder how many others have had this "stunt" pulled on them as well.

A few thoughts.....

Can the time of the ceremony and reception be adjusted so folks can catch that last ferry? This might help some but I don't think the cost of the rooms is the biggest issue....its the cost of the reception, correct?

Our friends' daughter does the events at The Grand Hotel on Mackinac and in looking at their prices compared to what you are being offered, your deal looks to be very good. Small comfort I know.

I pulled up Mission Points pricing on line and it looks like there should be a lot more included than what you listed or I missed the details in your posts. It references a number of extras before the wedding, during, and after including a one hour bar and a champagne toast. Are they including that still in your price? If so, then the price really does not seem high at all for the area. In looking at that online pricing guide it is kind of confusing as it says the bar is included for one hour in one place and in another quotes it at $18/per so I would really make a copy of that online listing and say "look! it says it is included". Cost after that at $8/hour is super cheap and their prices for "consumption" are also low for a resort out on the island.

As regulars of this establishment, I totally concur with the suggestion to contact the owners and let them know what has happened. They may do nothing or they may do something. Either way, either the woman listed as the event planner needs a talking to or the manager needs a talking to. This is still going to end up being a hurtful experience for the kids and that more than anything is what bothers me. I would so not to want to look back on my wedding day and always think about what I was promised and how I got burned. And I hear what you say about this being her dream to get married there, but I would "gently" ask if the location is more important versus who they will be able to have attend. Awful but true.

My best wishes to them and you as you go through this. Weddings are stressful enough without having issues like this.

Wow, after reading your post, I checked it out too.

http://www.missionpoint.com/pdfs/Wedding_Guide_2010.pdf

OP have you compared the costs here and what you're getting vs what you were quoted? I'd save an offline copy of this and bring it to management if you're getting short changed and/or overcharged.

 

[Lewisc]

A cash bar is tacky. Reducing the number of guests is unlikely to save very much money. The resort probably has a minimum guarantee. I wouldn't be surprised if the minimum is 100 guests. Given the economy, and the increased room rate, you might not even meet the minimum.

Can you change the date? The resort may be more flexible, come close to your original rates, if you move from a peak time. Mid-week. Shoulder season.

Let me speculate. The manger gave you the "best rates" offered. Probably not to be offered on a peak date. You're probably not supposed to get all of them. Either a discount on the dinner or a deeper discount on the hotel rooms.

edited to add:

Two months is a long time to negotiate without signing a contract. It's possible they missed an "early booking" discount. Also possible bookings at the resort improved over 2 months and discounts that might have been available 2 months ago are no longer available. Wait another month to sign and the rates you have today may not be valid.

I see a PP provided a link. Looks like many of the packages only have a 50 person minimum. Still may be an issue. Invite 60 people and you may wind up with less then 50.

The OP really needs to itemize other expenses. Tips (possibly maitre 'd) not included. Flowers....

JMO but I think you're either going to have to find a way to pay more $$$, change the date or change the location. I don't see anyway you're going to be able to do the wedding at that resort for the price you thought was available.

 

[surfgirl]

think creatively!

If it has to be at Mission Point (I've stayed there but didn't have a great experience... we were give a "suite", which was basically 2 dorm rooms with a bathroom in-between. bleck. It became a running joke. The whole resort is beautiful tho.), then find other things to give on.

- does it have to be sit down dinner for all ?
=> can she do extra hors d'oeuvres for longer ?
=> how about afternoon tea and champagne ? Then, if people wanted, they could catch the ferry back to the mainland ... or you could have a rockin' band at somewhere cheaper ?
=> can she do the buffet instead of sit-down ?

If everything is 'non-negotiable' then I guess it is... suck it up and pay. No other options!

I would keep FOB out of this. Have him write a check to the kids for what he is willing to pay and have them manage the budget. Otherwise, every little other thing is going to turn into, "oh, its a problem". And trust me, FOB have no clue about the cost of dresses, hair, makeup, shoes, etc etc etc.

 

[LuLuO]

Yes, as PP stated what about having an early wedding and afternoon reception? That way the guests could still catch a ferry back to stay in a lesser expensive hotel if they choose. The buffet lunches looks very tasty and reasonable as does the Afternoon Tea.

Also, as far as guest accommotadions I just read that "most weekends require a two night stay" so would your guests be looking at about $400 to be able to attend/stay at the resort, or do you have that worked out that there is not two night minimum. Something to consider if you haven't already.

 

[hinodis]

OP here. I have been online all morning trying to find alternative locations. I do have one prospect. I am waiting for someone to contact me. The resort changed their wedding package to fit my budget. In my opinion, the things that took out did not add up right to the change in price. I get the feeling from some of the postes that some may think that the bride and groom are being brats and insisting on an over budget wedding at the resort. Nothing could be farther from the truth!! Mackinac is a very special place to them (they got engaged there) and it is where they want the wedding. Neither one has EVER asked us to pay more money.As far as an earlier wedding....can't do it. There are already other weddings booked that day. Changing the date will not work either. Alot odf the wedding party are still in school, including the bride and groom. Both of my son's ( groom and best man) will be in school this summer. The groom is in a graduate program. Everything was all set before this fiasco happened! They have just stripped it down to bare bones. The bride and groom's parents were supposed to have comped rooms for the night of the wedding...nope took that away as well. I am so fed up with the whole thing. I am now looking at the Island House.

 

[OceanAnnie]

OP here. I have been online all morning trying to find alternative locations. I do have one prospect. I am waiting for someone to contact me. The resort changed their wedding package to fit my budget. In my opinion, the things that took out did not add up right to the change in price. I get the feeling from some of the postes that some may think that the bride and groom are being brats and insisting on an over budget wedding at the resort. Nothing could be farther from the truth!! Mackinac is a very special place to them (they got engaged there) and it is where they want the wedding. Neither one has EVER asked us to pay more money.As far as an earlier wedding....can't do it. There are already other weddings booked that day. Changing the date will not work either. Alot odf the wedding party are still in school, including the bride and groom. Both of my son's ( groom and best man) will be in school this summer. The groom is in a graduate program. Everything was all set before this fiasco happened! They have just stripped it down to bare bones. The bride and groom's parents were supposed to have comped rooms for the night of the wedding...nope took that away as well. I am so fed up with the whole thing. I am now looking at the Island House.

Good luck! I hope they will be more accommodating! I do hope everything is resolved satisfactorily soon. I know it's very stressful to you all.

 

[LuLuO]

OP here. I have been online all morning trying to find alternative locations. I do have one prospect. I am waiting for someone to contact me. The resort changed their wedding package to fit my budget. In my opinion, the things that took out did not add up right to the change in price. I get the feeling from some of the postes that some may think that the bride and groom are being brats and insisting on an over budget wedding at the resort. Nothing could be farther from the truth!! Mackinac is a very special place to them (they got engaged there) and it is where they want the wedding. Neither one has EVER asked us to pay more money.As far as an earlier wedding....can't do it. There are already other weddings booked that day. Changing the date will not work either. Alot odf the wedding party are still in school, including the bride and groom. Both of my son's ( groom and best man) will be in school this summer. The groom is in a graduate program. Everything was all set before this fiasco happened! They have just stripped it down to bare bones. The bride and groom's parents were supposed to have comped rooms for the night of the wedding...nope took that away as well. I am so fed up with the whole thing. I am now looking at the Island House.

Good luck OP. Weddings are stressful enough without vendors making it even more stressful. Let us know what works out.

 

[SweetPeasMom2]

Sent you a private message.

 

[sookie]

if they are old enough to get married, these kids aren't stupid. they know the situation with increased prices and they do realize that they are asking you to proceed with a much higher price. so yes, if they are asking you to proceed at that specific resort, they are asking you to pay more.

i would offer to do other things on the island if the island is special to them.

i would tell them that if you can't get it straightened out, they will need to pay the gap. my husband and myself - 20 and 25 (when we married) - while parents helped, we paid for over 90% of our own wedding, and I knew what the costs involved were and how to handle them. there were no blinders involved, and even if family paid for 100% of it i would have been integral to making sure that it didn't financially harm anyone.

i would say dont even do the alcohol. i think having alcohol at a wedding is tacky anyway. i dont need alcohol to have fun at a wedding with my family - i have fun spending time with them. thats just my thoughts though.

 

[Lewisc]

Everyone wants to blame the place but the OP is at fault. You want the wedding at a specific place and on a specific date. The bride and groom don't want any place else. There isn't another date that works for the wedding party.

Why did you wait to place a deposit and sign a contract? Forget about the price and package, the resort could have booked another wedding. It sounds like you made a lot of plans but skipped the part where you and the resort commit to a date and a price.

The place wants to make a minimum amount of money for your affair. Cutting back only saves the "wholesale" price of whatever items you're deleting. That's why it doesn't add up. It might make more sense to just find a way to pay.

Of course you lost the comped rooms. Generally a business offers something for free in exchange for a customer not getting a discounted price.

edited to add--I agree with the pp. Unless the kids are voluntarily agreeing to contribute enough extra to cover the increased costs they are asking, or expecting, you'll pay the extra.

Alcohol is generally included in weddings. Skipping alcohol is tacking.

OP here. I have been online all morning trying to find alternative locations. I do have one prospect. I am waiting for someone to contact me. The resort changed their wedding package to fit my budget. In my opinion, the things that took out did not add up right to the change in price. I get the feeling from some of the postes that some may think that the bride and groom are being brats and insisting on an over budget wedding at the resort. Nothing could be farther from the truth!! Mackinac is a very special place to them (they got engaged there) and it is where they want the wedding. Neither one has EVER asked us to pay more money.As far as an earlier wedding....can't do it. There are already other weddings booked that day. Changing the date will not work either. Alot odf the wedding party are still in school, including the bride and groom. Both of my son's ( groom and best man) will be in school this summer. The groom is in a graduate program. Everything was all set before this fiasco happened! They have just stripped it down to bare bones. The bride and groom's parents were supposed to have comped rooms for the night of the wedding...nope took that away as well. I am so fed up with the whole thing. I am now looking at the Island House.

 

[maxiesmom]

After re-reading the OP's first post, I think her anger is misplaced. She should be angry at the wedding sales manager who apparently offered things she could not guarantee getting. Shouldn't she have known ahead of time what kind of rates would be approved or not approved?

OP--I also am not sure of where in Michigan you are. But at the most you would be a 5 hour drive from Mackinac Island. With something as important on your plate as a wedding, I do think you share part of the blame if you couldn't take the time to arrange some sort of face to face planning meeting to make sure you were getting what you were planning on. I'm sorry, but you the blame for the mess up is not just the fault of the resort manager.

 

[hinodis]

Thank you for being so kind and blaming me. It was the wedding managers decision to have us sign the contract when we returned to the island in October. A contract that was not even finished and approved when we arrived at the resort. (I am sure this was my fault somehow, right?) Why do you all think the kids are asking for more money?? They understand that the number of people that can be invited correlates with the budget and the price per person. I SPECIFICALLY called the wedding manager and told her we are printing the save a dates, do you have room prices for the guests yet? She said I will call you back with them. She called back and gave me the rate. Why would I think it would change? SHE offered the free rooms to the parents AND it was in the contract. But it is my fault. I am not surprised by some of the comments.

 

[maxiesmom]

Thank you for being so kind and blaming me. It was the wedding managers decision to have us sign the contract when we returned to the island in October. A contract that was not even finished and approved when we arrived at the resort. (I am sure this was my fault somehow, right?) Why do you all think the kids are asking for more money?? They understand that the number of people that can be invited correlates with the budget and the price per person. I SPECIFICALLY called the wedding manager and told her we are printing the save a dates, do you have room prices for the guests yet? She said I will call you back with them. She called back and gave me the rate. Why would I think it would change? SHE offered the free rooms to the parents AND it was in the contract. But it is my fault. I am not surprised by some of the comments.

The wedding planner has the main fault here. She shouldn't have promised you anything without making sure she could deliver on it first. It sounds like she really screwed up! But, when planning something as major as a wedding, you really need to sign a contract and spend some face to face time planning. Not spend all your time negotiating. Kind of like how you can research hotels on line, but that price is not guaranteed until you pay for it. Any quote you get is not guaranteed until you sign the contract.

 

[hinodis]

Good luck! I hope they will be more accommodating! I do hope everything is resolved satisfactorily soon. I know it's very stressful to you all.

Thank you OceanAnnie, you always have such nice things to say to everybody on here.

 

[Anne34]

Wow, after reading your post, I checked it out too.

http://www.missionpoint.com/pdfs/Wedding_Guide_2010.pdf

OP have you compared the costs here and what you're getting vs what you were quoted? I'd save an offline copy of this and bring it to management if you're getting short changed and/or overcharged.

I can't believe you were quoted such a high rate for food -- their web site definitely does say different things. Their prices are really going up for 2011 if those are the prices. I would switch to a buffet (cheaper) or continue looking at other options.

Just saw you are looking at Island House. We have stayed there and really liked it -- good luck with this mess. Mackinac is very pretty in summer!

 

[Fly4free]

Unfortunately this is a tough learning experience for you and your family. Most of us do not negotiate weddings and receptions on a regular basis. I don't see why all the negative criticism from posters.

I am glad to hear you are looking into other options. This way it will either reinforce that the price you are getting at the original location is appropriate, or give you some bargaining leverage. I would definately write a letter to the manager explaining that the price difference you were originally quoted is way too far off the current price. The worse that can happen is he/she says sorry, can't offer any more discounts. It is always good to leave a paper trail with any correspondance.

Best wishes to you and no matter the outcome it will be a wonderful day.

 

[OceanAnnie]

Thank you OceanAnnie, you always have such nice things to say to everybody on here.

You're welcome and thank you.

IIRC, didn't I see the pictures of your son and Fiance shortly after they got engaged? I'm thinking I did. They were near a wheel in a old fashioned building? They are a lovely couple! I know how much you want this for both of them. It's a once in a lifetime event.

It will all work out. You will find a way.

 

[Purseval]

Thank you for being so kind and blaming me.
(snip)
I am not surprised by some of the comments.

Thank you for reacting so well to constructive criticism. Nobody blames you for what happened but you are fully responsible for what's happening now thanks to your and the wedding couple's inflexibility. So break out the charge cards, pay up and enjoy the reception. You really don't give yourselves any other choice.

 

[hinodis]

The wedding planner has the main fault here. She shouldn't have promised you anything without making sure she could deliver on it first. It sounds like she really screwed up! But, when planning something as major as a wedding, you really need to sign a contract and spend some face to face time planning. Not spend all your time negotiating. Kind of like how you can research hotels on line, but that price is not guaranteed until you pay for it. Any quote you get is not guaranteed until you sign the contract.

I agree, but it is not an easy task when you are far away. Face to face is always better but in this case is not always possible. That is why we made the plans to go back. Of course, the contract was not ready. At this moment the resort is CLOSED for the winter. Heck almost the whole island is closed. There is not even ferry service. Maybe I will wait till the lake freezes and cross over on the ice bridge on my snowmobile.

 

[dunbarfamily]

Yes, Mission Point! Have you stayed there?

No, but I've been past it a bunch of times. They have some really great deals pre- and post-season. I always hope the stars will line up and we'll be able to go, but it hasn't happened yet! Friends of mine have stayed there a few times and LOVE it!!

Small world, isn't it?