Wedding Disaster STRIKES!

[TheSawas]

Well . . .

I obviously chose the wrong icon form my thread (as I am SO NOT happy).

Our wedding was scheduled for March 14, 2008 at the Wedding Pavilion. Obviously we were having trouble finding a priest who would perform our ceremony in a non-denominational church. Well, we were fortunate enough to find a priest to do our ceremony and then the "snag" happened. Our date is in the middle of Lent next year. No Catholic weddings are performed during Lent. The obvious solution is to move our wedding date but we don't have much flexibility. DF is finishing law school next year. We chose our wedding date to fall during his spring break. After finishing in May he takes the BAR exam in the summer, finds a job, not to mention it's Disney's peak season (too much $$$). My sister is getting married October 20, 2007 so moving our date earlier isn't really much of an option. This is just one of those pulling-the-wedding-out-from-under-your-feet kind of moments (although I am sure others have had much worse).

DF just told me "Don't worry about it" but I am FREAKING OUT. I don't like the idea of waiting until next fall 2008 or later. I don't know what I hope to accomplish with this post, but I know the boards are good for group hugs and things like that.



The sad smilies really aren't attractive.

Jenny

 

[prncesaurora21]

i'm sorry that this happened to you! maybe you could find a non-denominational officiant to do your Disney wedding and do a small Catholic ceremony after Lent is over? A vow renewal of sorts so that you are official in the eyes of the Church? I'm not sure how that works...I stopped practicing long before I got engaged.

Good luck!

 

[Gina Loves Disney]

I have the same scheduling problem with myself and law school, we will be getting married Jan 2009 of my last year, winter break.... but I digress.....


How important is a Catholic Priest to you really? I mean, don't take this the wrong way I mean no disrespect, but if it was that important to you wouldn't you not want to get married during Lent anyway?

Anyway, I hope you find a solution!

 

[pooh98378]

I'm sorry! It'll be ok!!

My DF and I had a similar problem minus the priest issue. I will also be finishing law school next year (hopefully). We were originally thinking of getting married right after I graduate in May. But, then we discovered that we would only have two weeks for both of us to graduate (he's still in school too), get married, go on a honeymoon, and move because the bar review classes start around June 1 here. So -- we decided to get married in early January, when we are both still on Christmas break. It's not exactly what we wanted because we wanted to finish school first, but we decided it would be WAY too much stress for all of that within two weeks.

I'm sure it will all work out for you too!

 

[beckyb29]

Jenny, I'm so sorry this has happened to you....I wish there was more I could do, but a group hug may have to work for now!

I wish I had more advice, but all I can offer you is that several of the officiants down there are very willing to perform any sort of ceremony you would like. Unfortunatly, it still won't be recognized by the church.

It may not seem like it now, but everything will work out eventually-you will marry your sweetheart and live happily every after!! And just remember-we're here for you no matter what!

 

[TheSawas]

I have the same scheduling problem with myself and law school, we will be getting married Jan 2009 of my last year, winter break.... but I digress.....


How important is a Catholic Priest to you really? I mean, don't take this the wrong way I mean no disrespect, but if it was that important to you wouldn't you not want to get married during Lent anyway?

Wow! You guys are fast! Thank you for your words.

We chose our date a couple of weeks ago and didn't realize Lent started so early next year (didn't even know Easter was in March). It's these little details that were overlooked (mostly on my part) that are causing big problems. I used a plain calendar that listed no holidays. The fact of the matter is now that we know we CAN'T get married during Lent (no question about that) and our March 14 date no longer exists. I am an anxious bride without a wedding date.

I did just receive my Jack Pack in the mail yesterday (was very excited) but DF says the wedding only happens with a priest and I can respect that.

 

[Gina Loves Disney]

Wow! You guys are fast! Thank you for your words.

We chose our date a couple of weeks ago and didn't realize Lent started so early next year (didn't even know Easter was in March). It's these little details that were overlooked (mostly on my part) that are causing big problems. I used a plain calendar that listed no holidays. The fact of the matter is now that we know we CAN'T get married during Lent (no question about that) and our March 14 date no longer exists. I am an anxious bride without a wedding date.

I did just receive my Jack Pack in the mail yesterday (was very excited) but DF says the wedding only happens with a priest and I can respect that.

IDK if this is a realistic option but what if you were to have a catholic ceremony at home, before the actual wedding, and then the disney wedding becomes a VR? IDK if you can even do that but it might fix the problem if you can!

Hope something works out!

 

[TheSawas]

It may not seem like it now, but everything will work out eventually-you will marry your sweetheart and live happily every after!! And just remember-we're here for you no matter what!

So true! That really did make me smile.

pooh98378: It seems you and I are rowing in the same boat and I think you may have given me an idea. Thank you so much.

Jenny

 

[TheSawas]

I just wanted to say thank you to everyone who has posted (and so quickly too). DF is going to read these post before he goes to bed so we can discuss some of the options everyone is providing us with. Thank you all so much for the ideas and your unique opinions.

Love you guys!

Jenny

 

[DVCGirl49]

Sorry, I';m not Catholic so I need to ask....why can't a wedding be perfomed during lent?

 

[msmayor]

I'm Catholic, and I got married during Lent (two weeks before Easter, as a matter of fact). Our only restriction was one floral arrangement on the altar, which had to be removed immediately after the wedding (there are no plants, flowers or decorations at all in the church during Lent.). My understanding is that Holy Week is the only time during Lent when marriages cannot take place. If your date is outside of Holy Week, then perhaps its a problem with the specific Priest or parish you are dealing with.

The reality is that it's rare to find a priest that WILL marry a couple outside the doors of a Catholic Church at any time. There are traditions and standards that the Church has which require a marriage ceremony to take place on a blessed altar. I know there are some who think this is silly, and don't understand why, but it is what it is. There are rare parishes that will accommodate, but most will not.

 

[myprincessgirlisa]

I dont really have much to offer since im not catholic, DH is.

I hope things work out for you

Although....you could do an Intimate DFTW ceremony & a second at home ceremony with church, family & reception..the whole works....& you could have pics & video from the DFTW at the at home reception for people to see.

Lots of girls seem to do DFTW & at home stuff...worth checking out

 

[prprincess]

I really wanted a Catholic wedding when I got married, so what I did was hire Rev. Jack and he preformed a Catholic ceremony outside of mass. Then he signed our marriage license as a justice of the peace, I believe, and not as a reverend because we had planned on covalidating the marriage with our church upon our return.

Four years later, and we still haven't gone through with the covalidation. Only because after our Disney wedding the urgency for our wedding to be Catholic just flew out the door for some reason. Go figure.

Anyway, my point is, talk to the priest at your parish. Most are happy to covalidate destination weddings once you get back home.

 

[JJClemson]

Could you have your wedding next year during your DF's winter break?

I'm also Catholic and have had many problems w/ the whole marriage and Catholic church issue. I'm sorry you have to go through this. Everything will work out

 

[ForKeeps]

I'm another law student who got married over winter break. It actually worked out really well because people already had time off...and it was during the "value" season, so the rooms were cheaper.

We had a great time!

I hope you find a solution...

 

[happylalagirl]

I did just receive my Jack Pack in the mail yesterday (was very excited) but DF says the wedding only happens with a priest and I can respect that.

I respect the fact that your DF wants to be married by a priest. Did you think of doing a private ceremony at home before Lent and then going through with it again in Disney? I had a friend who got married 3x. Once was a civil ceremony at city hall. One was in India where most of her DF's family was and then she had an AMerican ceremony for her friends and family over here to attend. Just a thought...

 

[LIGrumpyGirl]

Well . . .

Our wedding was scheduled for March 14, 2008 at the Wedding Pavilion.

I was married March 14, 1998 ( first marriage seems like ages ago) during Lent. I married into a very religous family and their church was ok with the wedding during Lent. We just couldn't decorate anything in the church other than bows on the pews.

Maybe check again? Otherwise my suggestion is what others say...marry first at home...make Disney a VR.

 

[TheSawas]

Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. A billion times thank you. What a lengthy post that would be eh?

I spent my time at work today wedding troubleshooting. Making phone calls on my restroom breaks, giving my mother information and having her make some phone calls, sharing these posts with my DF. Been busy and stressed because I have grown into a worrier. We already have an at home wedding reception planned, nothing formal. DF is really being picky about specifics and logistics although he usually doesn't even make sense. If we want a Catholic ceremony so badly we should have it at home in a church not during Lent . . . but DF knows how badly I want a Disney wedding so we compromise. That's what couples do. Catholic ceremony (we do have a priest who will do it) at Disney is our compromise.

Our current solution is move the wedding date from March 14, 2008 to January 5, 2008. It's getting shoved closer to my sister's wedding but it seems like the better solution for us (plus we'll have more time for a Disneymoon afterwards). I called my EM today and she said I can still have everything I wanted for March 14. She'll give me my confirmation TOMORROW as the date is less than a year away. I still feel worried for one reason or another but I am sure I'll get better sleep tonight.

Again thank you to all who have offered support, advice, and opinions. You didn't let Bridezilla take over. Thank you happylalagirl (that's my follow up plan ), ForKeeps (thanks for showing me some more positives ), JJClemson (hug for you ), myprincessgirlisa (it's in the works ), and msmayor (that's interesting. ourpriest is flexible enough to marry us at Disney but not during Lent).

This post is longer than an Oscar acceptance speech. Y'all are like therapy for the DFTW brides and grooms.



With thanks!

Jenny AND James

 

[ForKeeps]

Oh I'm glad you're feel better! I had so many similar tensions and initially planned for May 2007. Then the Law Society of Upper Canada decided they were going to change around their liscencing program and alotted the month of May for self study with our bar exams at the end. (gulp!)

When that all happened we were waiting for the 8 month mark to hit. All of a sudden we had to make a decision and bumped it all to January 4th, 2007. Within a week the wedding, the flights, the hotel rooms....and even the ADRs were booked (sometimes I like to think of myself as a lean mean planning machiene!)

I found winter holidays to be a great time because I had no school stress at all. Plus...if I remember correctly the parks completely died down by January 6th. The one thing I wanted to let you know to be careful about is the marathon. We happened (by chance) to be in parks that weren't affected by the marathon -- but our guests were frustrated.

I'm really glad things are looking up...

 

[DisneyFairy19]

HI ... I am so sorry you must be so stressed. here is a hug for you.. I hope everything will work out for you.. Can Disney move it to February or April???