WBRepo-Ship of Thieves-Remember the Magic Pt 19

[Tink rules]

Off to go sell popcorn. Ugghh. I have the WORST cramps in the world and am growling with irritation over having to spend time with bratty kids. Not a good day for this, but........it is what it is. At least it's not raining. It's chilly and windy, but that won't bother me. 2 of the 3 boys who will be there were horrible last time, running all over the parking lot, totally misbehaving. I kept telling them to stay on the sidewalk, etc. Their mom was on the other side of the parking lot selling from a different location, so she kept coming over to yell at the kids. Total chaos. I will NOT be babysitting them today. I should have been there 20 minutes ago, but oh well. They can take a longer lunch break.

Gee, can ya tell I'm crabby today?

Channel that PMS energy into popcorn sales!!!!! (just don't chase any customers away...)

 

[Tink rules]

Trying to clean the kitchen 5 minutes at a time. Every time I go out there for a drink, I make sure I pick up a few things. Hopefully that will help me get through it.

I'm doing the house that way...

 

[HollyTyler]

I'm doing the house that way...

Too overwhelming for me to think about the whole house. I spent about a half hour stretch in the kitchen (was on a roll), ended up with a big trash bag of stuff and put 4 items on craigslist, and the kitchen still looks the same.

 

[HollyTyler]

Wow, I would never have felt comfortable having Tyler do a sleepover at a classmate's house when he was in kindergarten. Too many crazy things in today's world can happen. I have a friend who is talking about this on FB and saying she's leaving that decision up to her 5yr old. Yikes!

 

[HollyTyler]

Trying to come up with a good punishment for Tyler for tomorrow. He's suspended from school for the day. There was no punishment at dad's because Tyler told him he didn't do anything and his dad believed him and told the school that. The teacher then told me she had a talk with Tyler about why he'd tell that to his dad. She didn't share with me the whole conversation, but the gist is that Tyler knows I will be mad, but knows he won't get in trouble at his dad's. Great lesson dad is teaching him and I'm ticked off at Tyler for manipulating that way. I have to tell his dad that Tyler is walking all over him, or should I even bother? He won't believe me anyway because he believes Tyler.

Oh, I know......maybe part of the punishment should be for Tyler to write a note to his dad telling him he lied. Plus I'm going to make him do math all day. He needs to know he doesn't get a fun day off. No TV or playing outside either. And I'm considering having him reimburse me for a portion of the pay I'm losing for having to miss work. Too harsh?

 

[EllaEnchanted]

Trying to come up with a good punishment for Tyler for tomorrow. He's suspended from school for the day. There was no punishment at dad's because Tyler told him he didn't do anything and his dad believed him and told the school that. The teacher then told me she had a talk with Tyler about why he'd tell that to his dad. She didn't share with me the whole conversation, but the gist is that Tyler knows I will be mad, but knows he won't get in trouble at his dad's. Great lesson dad is teaching him and I'm ticked off at Tyler for manipulating that way. I have to tell his dad that Tyler is walking all over him, or should I even bother? He won't believe me anyway because he believes Tyler.

Oh, I know......maybe part of the punishment should be for Tyler to write a note to his dad telling him he lied. Plus I'm going to make him do math all day. He needs to know he doesn't get a fun day off. No TV or playing outside either. And I'm considering having him reimburse me for a portion of the pay I'm losing for having to miss work. Too harsh?

Great idea to have Tyler write the note to dad telling him that he lied. That takes care of dad too and you don't have to confront him yourself. Definitely do school work all day, no play day. I'm not so sure I would charge him for the money that you lose. It's a good concept for him to learn but I think you can just tell him. You can tell him that if it continues then you will charge him next time. Give him a warning on that one. I would make him do chores around the house too. Something that he doesn't like to do. Make sure it's not a play day. Great punishments though....very creative and teaching lessons. Awesome!

 

[HollyTyler]

Great idea to have Tyler write the note to dad telling him that he lied. That takes care of dad too and you don't have to confront him yourself. Definitely do school work all day, no play day. I'm not so sure I would charge him for the money that you lose. It's a good concept for him to learn but I think you can just tell him. You can tell him that if it continues then you will charge him next time. Give him a warning on that one. I would make him do chores around the house too. Something that he doesn't like to do. Make sure it's not a play day. Great punishments though....very creative and teaching lessons. Awesome!

Thanks Deb. Unfortunately, I haven't yet found any chores around the house that he doesn't like to do, because he likes cleaning so much. He enjoys it all because it's calming and soothing, no matter how yucky the job. He's backwards in that regard. But schoolwork is his enemy, especially writing and math, so that's why I picked those.

The money thing, I did warn him last school year that I would do that next time, but it's surely not fresh in his mind, so a warning for next time. Thanks!

The first month of school "honeymoon phase" is over. Back to reality. This was his 2nd rough week, but first out of school suspension this school year. He partially did the right thing though, so I do have to acknowledge that. When the kids were lining up to come in from recess, a boy shoved Tyler out of line and then punched him (I have no idea whether Tyler did something to instigate this), Tyler shoved the boy back and then went to get 2 adults to help. It has taken all these years for him to finally remember to go get help and not just start punching back, so that part is good, but where he went wrong is not stepping back to let the adults do their jobs and handle it, he still jumped in and punched the kid.

It's a tough call. On one hand, you don't want your kid to be a punching bag and labeled a tattler by the other kids, but on the other hand, rules are rules because if this happened as adults, they'd both go to jail. Hard lessons.

 

[HollyTyler]

A coworker suggested making him write "I will keep my hands to myself" or something similar, 100 times since writing is such a chore and at the same time it's further reinforcing that concept. I like that idea. And then make him show that to his principal.

 

[Tink rules]

I wouldn't "charge" him for the time you had to take off...but somehow make him understand that he won't be getting any treats (day trips, etc) because you lost money having to stay home with him.

I like the idea of him writing to his dad... AND make HIM give it to him... and if there's a problem.. have the teacher back you up with it.

And he can come clean my house if he wants...

 

[HollyTyler]

I wouldn't "charge" him for the time you had to take off...but somehow make him understand that he won't be getting any treats (day trips, etc) because you lost money having to stay home with him.

I like the idea of him writing to his dad... AND make HIM give it to him... and if there's a problem.. have the teacher back you up with it.

And he can come clean my house if he wants...

 

[HollyTyler]

So I guess I get no time with Tyler today. He's still not home and it's almost bedtime. His dad DID text me to ask if he could drop him off later, like 6:30 or 7, because they had a long drive. He took Tyler up north for "guy time" at grandpa's new cabin for the weekend, but just because he's not going to school tomorrow doesn't mean he gets to stay up later.

 

[Tink rules]

Straight to bed and then get him up and writing tomorrow!!!

In sympathy.. I'll have Planky try to write "I will not steal Shell's credit cards..." (at least once... it could take all day... )

 

[HollyTyler]

Straight to bed and then get him up and writing tomorrow!!!

In sympathy.. I'll have Planky try to write "I will not steal Shell's credit cards..." (at least once... it could take all day... )

Yup, he had to go right to bed. I also held off on grocery shopping so I can make him go with me. I usually do it before picking him up because he hates it so much, so that's why I saved it this time.

 

[HollyTyler]

I wonder if I can get the police to come scare the tar out of him. My head is pounding from the screaming tantrum that's been going on for 2 hours now after writing 6 sentences. "I'm not doing this and you can't make me". How do you make a 100 pound 5 ft tall strong kid do something?!?! I'd like to knock him into next week, but of course I can't do that. I'm sitting on my hands to literally keep from lashing out. I fully expect the neighbors to call the police because of how loud he is. No exaggerating.

 

[mishoe01]

I wonder if I can get the police to come scare the tar out of him. My head is pounding from the screaming tantrum that's been going on for 2 hours now after writing 6 sentences. "I'm not doing this and you can't make me". How do you make a 100 pound 5 ft tall strong kid do something?!?! I'd like to knock him into next week, but of course I can't do that. I'm sitting on my hands to literally keep from lashing out. I fully expect the neighbors to call the police because of how loud he is. No exaggerating.

 

[mishoe01]

Holly - is this b/c his meds were reduced?

 

[HollyTyler]

Holly - is this b/c his meds were reduced?

No, we haven't had that appointment yet. I had to reschedule it because I was on call for jury duty, then it was moved to tomorrow, but that's during MEAP testing, so I have rescheduled for 11/1. This is just fuel for my argument for NOT reducing meds. This started out as extremely willful defiance. It's behavior completely in his control, at least in the beginning, the med is supposed to stop him from escalating out of control into extreme rage. I'm just not equipped or trained to help him stay in control like his teacher is. I just kept making him pick up whatever he threw and then made him sit back down with his paper and pencil. When he crumpled the paper after 6 sentences I made him start over. I finally told him he could have a break if he wrote 5 sentences, so he screamed through the 5 and fell asleep.

He is so mad! That tells me I picked a good punishment. I will have him write more while I fix his lunch and then he has to get back to writing. And he still has homework to do that his dad didn't even have him touch over the weekend. At one point he told me he'd rather go to jail than be here with me because I'm so mean. Good, that means I'm doing something right!

 

[mishoe01]

No, we haven't had that appointment yet. I had to reschedule it because I was on call for jury duty, then it was moved to tomorrow, but that's during MEAP testing, so I have rescheduled for 11/1. This is just fuel for my argument for NOT reducing meds. This started out as extremely willful defiance. It's behavior completely in his control, at least in the beginning, the med is supposed to stop him from escalating out of control into extreme rage. I'm just not equipped or trained to help him stay in control like his teacher is. I just kept making him pick up whatever he threw and then made him sit back down with his paper and pencil. When he crumpled the paper after 6 sentences I made him start over. I finally told him he could have a break if he wrote 5 sentences, so he screamed through the 5 and fell asleep.

He is so mad! That tells me I picked a good punishment. I will have him write more while I fix his lunch and then he has to get back to writing. And he still has homework to do that his dad didn't even have him touch over the weekend. At one point he told me he'd rather go to jail than be here with me because I'm so mean. Good, that means I'm doing something right!

Hang in there....you're doing the right thing.

 

[HollyTyler]

Hang in there....you're doing the right thing.

He even asked at one point, "What are you gonna do, hit me?" I honestly told him a part of me would like to because of how angry I was but that it would be the wrong thing to do. Then he was laughing about it, and saying nasty things, so the dish soap came out, there was spitting and yelling involved, I made him clean it up and get right back to the table. Uggghh....this sucks.

Well, he slept for 2 and a half hours, ate lunch, so now I have to get him back to it. Not ready for more screaming. Can't wait for this day to be over. It was such a nasty day already, hopefully it will prevent him from actions causing future suspensions.

There's a lot of evil in the air here today. Horrible.

 

[Tink rules]

Holly..

Call your ex immediately and tell him to get his collective A$$ over there and deal with is son with you.. Tyler is NOT your responsibilty alone. And then make Tyler tell his dad to his face that he lied to him.

And then have his dad sit there until Tyler finishes his writing. Let him see him in a full rage...