Washing Feet at Wedding

[tlbwriter]

Some people may consider you "primitive" and "stuck in 1860" because you have a promise ring. Don't be so quick to judge others.

And some people may consider you a <bad word> because you had your first kiss at age 12...

 

[bombygriz]

x

 

[Allison]

Does your mom ever read your threads to know the supposed personal information you are posting here?

It's pretty easy to put together a lot of information about you-name, age, hometown, job,etc.

 

[morethananyonex]

*sigh*

YES, I was in an abusive relationship for FOUR YEARS. Doesn't matter that I'm fifteen, it's possible to be in a relationship that young. Obviously, in the beginning, it wouldn't have been a serious relationship, but as time went on, things changed. I was naive, but the boy in question was 100% controlling. It took me a good six months to finally get out, because I believed the whole time that he was going to commit suicide if I did anything out of line. I was also abused in other ways. I went through hell and back, and you have no right to think that it never happened or that it wasn't that bad. The whole story is just too complicated to post here.

I was never offering 'relationship advice'. I was offering my take.

In my time, I have done things that may make me seem like a '****'. What people don't know is that I never did anything willingly. I was raped.

End of story. Stop getting off-topic to be cruel to me.

I've read many of your posts over time, and I have one thing to say to you. Don't dish it out if you can't take it, simple as that.

 

[dngnb8]

End of story. Stop getting off-topic to be cruel to me.

You mean like your quote about grammar?

Seems a bit "do as I say, not as I do" if you ask me.

 

[snapppyd]

*sigh*

YES, I was in an abusive relationship for FOUR YEARS. Doesn't matter that I'm fifteen, it's possible to be in a relationship that young. Obviously, in the beginning, it wouldn't have been a serious relationship, but as time went on, things changed. I was naive, but the boy in question was 100% controlling. It took me a good six months to finally get out, because I believed the whole time that he was going to commit suicide if I did anything out of line. I was also abused in other ways. I went through hell and back, and you have no right to think that it never happened or that it wasn't that bad. The whole story is just too complicated to post here.

I was never offering 'relationship advice'. I was offering my take.

In my time, I have done things that may make me seem like a '****'. What people don't know is that I never did anything willingly. I was raped.

End of story. Stop getting off-topic to be cruel to me.

Was it reported to the police??

 

[Magic Mom]

Uhm...they waited to have their first KISS until the wedding?! I was twelve! Jeez.

That all seems a bit...off. Washing each other's feet as a submission ritual? Primitive.

This seems like a VERY conservative wedding. Not my style, lol.

Soooo judgemental for someone so young with so little life experience. I have a friend that did the foot washing thing with her husband. They are both professional (she works in performing arts), modern people who just happened to want to express to each other that from that point forward, they were each other's servants (figuratively speaking.) I was really very touching. It was in no way primitive.

And just because you were playing tonsil hockey at age twelve doesn't mean that every one else should be doing that as well. Maybe it isn't their "style."

 

[Missy1961]

Does your mom ever read your threads to know the supposed personal information you are posting here?

It's pretty easy to put together a lot of information about you-name, age, hometown, job,etc.

I hope so.

 

[Plannin'Shannon]

Does your mom ever read your threads to know the supposed personal information you are posting here?

It's pretty easy to put together a lot of information about you-name, age, hometown, job,etc.

Agreed. I sincerely hope her mother is reading her posts.

 

[Magic Mom]

Agreed. I sincerely hope her mother is reading her posts.

Let's hope so.

 

[tlbwriter]

Uhm...they waited to have their first KISS until the wedding?! I was twelve! Jeez.

That all seems a bit...off. Washing each other's feet as a submission ritual? Primitive.

*sigh*

YES, I was in an abusive relationship for FOUR YEARS. Doesn't matter that I'm fifteen, it's possible to be in a relationship that young. Obviously, in the beginning, it wouldn't have been a serious relationship, but as time went on, things changed. I was naive, but the boy in question was 100% controlling. It took me a good six months to finally get out, because I believed the whole time that he was going to commit suicide if I did anything out of line. I was also abused in other ways. I went through hell and back, and you have no right to think that it never happened or that it wasn't that bad. The whole story is just too complicated to post here.

I was never offering 'relationship advice'. I was offering my take.

In my time, I have done things that may make me seem like a '****'. What people don't know is that I never did anything willingly. I was raped.

So they are "primitive" and deserve your contemptuous "jeez" because they didn't kiss as 12 yr olds like you did, and at that age you were already deep into an abusive relationship that involved rape? Um, maybe they are the ones doing it right.

 

[mdsoccermom]

I really think it's time mom sat her daughter down for a talk about humility and the inappropriateness of 1) divulging so much information and 2) arguing with adults about mature subjects on the internet.

 

[WowLookAtThat]

*sigh*

YES, I was in an abusive relationship for FOUR YEARS. Doesn't matter that I'm fifteen, it's possible to be in a relationship that young. Obviously, in the beginning, it wouldn't have been a serious relationship, but as time went on, things changed. I was naive, but the boy in question was 100% controlling. It took me a good six months to finally get out, because I believed the whole time that he was going to commit suicide if I did anything out of line. I was also abused in other ways. I went through hell and back, and you have no right to think that it never happened or that it wasn't that bad. The whole story is just too complicated to post here.

I was never offering 'relationship advice'. I was offering my take.

In my time, I have done things that may make me seem like a '****'. What people don't know is that I never did anything willingly. I was raped.

End of story. Stop getting off-topic to be cruel to me.

I really hope your mom is reading this.

 

[Microcell]

Back on topic.. we actually talked about this in church this Sunday! The job of washing feet at the time of Jesus was reserved for the lowman on the totem pole and when Jesus took off his kingly robes at the last supper Peter said that Jesus was his king and could not be reduced to such menial tasks. Jesus told the Disciples to go out and "wash the feet of others" in spreading the faith and to live in a Christian way of helping others.

A little added idea that my pastor gave us was that Jesus was saying that he wasn't going to be a Jewish Messiah, taking an earthly throne, and by taking off his robe and washing the feet of the Disciples he was indicating that his life was meant for service to God and he was not meant to wear that kingly robe here on earth.

Bible lesson over for today!

 

[DWGal210]

This would bug me too. Not because they saved themselves, etc but because they wouldn't shut up about it. Everyone should make the choices that are best for them but that doesn't mean everyone wants you to broadcast it 24/7. I'd also feel the same way about a couple who went on & on about their sex life being so great.

Yes, that was my experience as well. I was in bridal and did a few weddings for so-called "pure" couples. How did I know? Because they announced it and talked about it right from the first five minutes of our interactions and never stopped talking about it. In my opinion, they were the most sexually-obsessesd couples I've ever met and so were their family and friends. It was really uncomfortable because so much of the wedding chatter devolved into very salacious, wink-wink sex talk. There was nothing pure or loving about the way sexuality was being presented. There was also a lot of emphasis placed on the bride's "responsibility" to not tempt her future husband with any displays of "sex", i.e. her body. I felt dirty myself after listening to it and had to hold myself back from asking if actual proof of virginity was required and what would happen if either partner had been raped or molested. I also felt that something that should be private and intimate was being paraded out in order to win points with others who are judging them based upon their physical "purity", when in fact it should be more about emotional and mental cleanliness.


Obviously others may have had different experiences, but those were mine.

 

[BellvilleDad]

I agree. Weddings are all about symbolism and the foot washing and promise rings are obviously very important symbols to them. Saving your first kiss for your wedding day is unusual, but sweet. Some people can't believe you would marry someone without seeing if you are sexually compatible, but some people save that for their wedding nights, too.

Conservative, yes. Primitive, no.

 

[Aisling]

Stuck in 1860, I see. Holding hands is the new being ten feet away from each other-in most (adult) relationships, it's not a big deal. I mean, it's cute and romantic, but nobody really cares about it.

I like you, bombygriz, but "jeez" to wedding day first kisses, "primitive" to ritual foot washing" and "stuck in 1860" for not holding hands is not exhibiting your intelligence. Condescention inhibits ones ability to intelligently analyze information and, most importantly, to learn from it. Intelligence is useless when governed by defensiveness and pompousness. Feed your intelligence, bombygriz, don't cheapen it.

 

[Conservative Hippie]

Stuck in 1860, I see. Holding hands is the new being ten feet away from each other-in most (adult) relationships, it's not a big deal. I mean, it's cute and romantic, but nobody really cares about it.

I care when my husband holds my hand. I'm not so sure you can attest to what is or is not a big deal in "adult" relationships until you have had one.

 

[SaraJayne]

I care when my husband holds my hand. I'm not so sure you can attest to what is or is not a big deal in "adult" relationships until you have had one.

Agreed. I love it when DH holds my hand.

Since I've been married as long as she's been alive, I think I'll take marriage advice from someone who actually knows what they're talking about.

 

[phorsenuf]

Agreed. I love it when DH holds my hand.

Since I've been married as long as she's been alive, I think I'll take marriage advice from someone who actually knows what they're talking about.

I'm with you. I love when my husband reaches out for my hand when we are walking along. There's something just warm and romantic about it. I've been married almost twice as long as she's been alive, so I'm not too inclined to care what her opinions are on relationships.