Was your DH ever "Ready" to have kids?

[jsmith]

Mine was ready the day we got married-wanted a houseful-me not so much. Whats more he would be thrilled if we had another one now ( i would kill my self-im 49 and my baby is 21) He loves kids and since hes not talking me into any more-hes angling for grandkids-lol. My DIL is in no hurrry tho.

 

[FlightlessDuck]

I was ready to have kids pretty much right after my relationship with DW started.

 

[staley7580]

WIth my husband, we knew we were going to to start trying as soon as we got married. I had a son from a previous relationship, and he was 2 and a half when we got married, and we wanted kids fairly close together. I found out I was pregnant the night before our wedding! He looked at me and said... Im okay with that. Great! He got more excited as the pregnancy went along.. but when she was born, the doctor let him deliver her and he was DONE. In love. It was over for him. Now she is five and we just took her for her first day of Kindy and as we drove away from the school he grabbed a hold of the wheel and said.. Thats it. Im going back. I have to get her! We have four kids, and he would totally have more. Thankfully I am in charge of the uterus!

 

[bumbershoot]

When I talk to DH about it he is not against it, but he doesn't seem to be for it either. When I ask him about it he says "I'll be excited when you get pregnant, but I don't get excited about it thinking about". Is this normal? I don't want to rush him, and he says that I'm not, but I'm wondering if men ever really get excited for a baby...

I think he's telling you he's ready and it's time. I say you're putting words into his mouth because he isn't reacting like you would.



As for being excited, my husband's life long dream was to be married and have children. He was excited about the idea even as a young boy.

And when it happened with us, he know within a very short amount of time because my body nearly turned purple it was THAT obvious, and throughout the whole pregnancy he was completely tuned into the baby. Until labor, that is, when he got so freaked out he tuned out and I won't get into all that happened, but he will admit that he was so beyond useless he was actually a detriment to my wellbeing. So much so that when we have another, he might not be invited to the labor and birth, and he is completely fine with that, because of everything that happened.

But backing up...the moment that I got the peestick results, he totally "failed", LOL, because he knew already and had simply bought the test so that I would stop waffling on whether my symptoms were "real" or not. He knew, was already excited, and there was no need to say anything but "yep" when I showed him the results.


DS is just like him. He's 6, and a few months ago he cried because he was thinking about what if he does NOT get to have children when he grows up.

 

[ilovefh]

In this situation I think men are just different than women. While we grow up knowing we want to to be moms and thinking about it, they don't. DH was happy when we found out I was pregnant the first time. Not happy like I was, but happy. I thought about it and talked about it all day. It did bug me he did not seem as happy as I was. When I miscarried at 11 weeks he didn't cry, that I saw, and it bothered me. Turns out he was just trying to be strong for me and he had cried with my mom in the waiting room.

The second time I got pregnant he was happy, but hesitant. He didn't want me to have to experience what I did the first time. I ultimately miscarried again. This time I think the roles have reversed. I am 7 weeks pregnant, but I refuse to get excited about it. He is happier about it than I am, but I am just too terrified to be happy.

I think men are just wired differently. While the thought of not having children devastates me, DH has said many times if we don't have any, he will be okay with it.