Vow renewal is off

[Tiggerlover91]

For reasons that I cannot simply explain right now, the vow renewal that I was planning for DH and my 15th anniversary is off. I just picked out a dress and was really looking forward to purchasing it and was ready for the next step in getting the location....well tonight, I just told DH forget it.
I did tell him I still want to go to Atlanta/Stone Mountain for the week as that is just as important to me. So I guess now, I will just plan for a nice little anniversary trip without the vow renewal.
Okay, sorry to bother you guys. But sometimes when I have no one to talk to, I come here to the DIS to get it out. It does help and I hope you guys don't mind.
I do hope each of you had a happy thanksgiving!

Blessings,

Denise

PS
It wasn't going to be a Disney vow renewal nor was I honeymooning in Disney once again, but I visit this board often to read the stories and just wanted to share mine. Thanks.

 

[UnderTheMistletoe]

I'm so sorry....

We did the courthouse wedding last August. It was very last minute because of an unexpected deployment overseas. We had family trying to talk us out of this wedding becuase, "We were already married." It broke my heart to think that was the day I would always and only remember as my wedding day. We had started planning our FTW within about 4 months of the time we met.

I guess what I'm trying to say is that I know how you feel. You are so fortunate to have the wonderful husband that you do. Considering that half of all marriages today end in divorce, to be married for 15 years is fabulous!

Stick to your guns on going to Georgia. And who knows, maybe you can have a small, intimate vow renewal for just the two of you... and you can wear that dress. Don't shut your mind down completely to options!

Best wishes!
xoxo

PS- Have you read, "The Wedding" by Nicholas Sparks? You should... you'll see why

 

[Janet2k]

Tiggerlover91, my husband and I had a really awful wedding (I can't stress that enough). We promised each other that we would renew our vows every year thereafter as a way of making up for it. Well, real life got in the way and we never got around to renewing our vows for our one year anniversary. I was disappointed, but other things took priority at the time.

Fast forward about 15-plus years. I started to think about renewing our vows. Within a year or two, I was beginning to plan something, but then real life got in the way again. My plans never really made it beyond the wishful thinking stage, but it was still hard to put them aside.

When our 20th anniversary was within firing range, I took the do or die approach. My husband had just been laid-off, and I was waiting to be laid-off myself, but I decided that nothing would stand in our way. Come hell or high water, we would finally say, "I do, again." And so we did. I am very happy that we did , even if we had to wait 20 years for it.

If this year isn't right for you, try not to fret about it too much. There will be another year in your future that will be right. And when that year comes, you'll have your vow renewal. I hope that it will be all that you've ever dreamed it would be.

 

[Janet2k]

By the way, Tiggerlover91, I hope you had a nice Thanksgiving, too.

 

[Fantasia Sam]

Hi Denise

I think what is important is that you and your DH have the most wonderful anniversary and special time together. My personal opinion is that whilst it can be very poignant, a vow-renewal is not necessary to re-affirm the love that you both have for each other.

Hope you both had a wonderful Thanksgiving

 

[Tiggerlover91]

Janet 2K and Fantasia Sam....THANKS!
What wonderful words of advice and wisdom. I just so had my heart set on this for our 15th, but obviously, it's not the time.
A few on the CB told me to be married 15 years in itself is wonderful and I got a lot of congrats on that. I'll just have to let it go and plan for a wonderful vacation in Atlanta/Stone Mountain for the week.
I appreciate all of you responding.

Blessings,

Denise

 

[Janet2k]

Denise, to further show you that you are not alone, I'll throw out what my husband & I did for our 21st wedding anniversary last month...

As you might know (since I wrote about it in an old trip report), for my husband & my 19th anniversary, we celebrated it on the ballroom set of the "Haunted Mansion" movie (it was just a dinner party with friends). For our 20th anniversary last year, we celebrated it on the "Great Movie Ride" via an official FTW custom vow renewal. Do you wanna know what we did for this year's 21st wedding anniversary? We did nothing. Not a dang thing. Zero. Zilch. Nada.

The timing was all wrong this year. Both my husband and I had lost our jobs right as Summer was beginning, and on the same day too (and in completely different industries). I mean, what's the odds of that happening to an old married couple? A million to one? Ha!

Since my husband was taking HVAC classes at night, his schooling became his main goal once he lost his job. As for me, my main goal instantly became rediscovering my family since I had seen so little of them over the past few years (way too many long & thankless hours spent working for a company that was on the verge of bankruptcy). I am taking a year off as I attempt to figure out what to do with the next chapter in my life. In the meantime, I am spending so much time with my family that I fear they might begin finding a job for me just to get rid of me! But I look at what happened to me as a blessing. God knew that the one thing that was missing from my life was my family. He/She gave that back to me in spades.

As you can see, Denise, you are not alone. The timing isn't right for you this year, just as it wasn't right for me. But I have tasked my husband with planning something fun for our 25th anniversary. I figure he'll fail miserably at the job so I have been secretly compiling my own plans. When our 25th anniversary hits, we will do something wonderful, even if we don't do it as a vow renewal and only do it as a private event like we did for our 19th.

You go on that vacation and have a wonderful time. And keep your subconscious working on vow renewal plans because when the timing is finally right, you’ll have all sorts of wonderful ideas regarding how to celebrate your long and successful marriage.

Janet

 

[Tiggerlover91]

Wow Janet! What a cool story. Again thank you, your words have really helped. I know G-d is in control of everything and He's got everything all planned out, but sometimes I'm just like why not now? Well...not MY time but HIS time.
Again Janet, thank you so much. I really am looking forward to our trip in May. A week away will be nice.

Blessings,
Denise

 

[Janet2k]

One final thing...

My parents just celebrated 50 years of marriage. My Dad didn't want to do anything special for it so my Mother has secretly gone behind his back and booked multiple hotel rooms in Chicago for about 20 of us. She also has secretly purchased tickets to the play, "Tony & Tina's Wedding." Over the Christmas/New Year's holidays, everyone is flying into Chicago for the big surprise 50th wedding anniversary celebration. My Dad won't know what hit him. Long live Mom's! They rule!

 

[Janet2k]

I should post a link to the "Tony n' Tina's Wedding" website: click here. It should be a very fun way to celebrate my parents' anniversary.

 

[Disneyrsh]

Hey,

 

[ohanafamily]

Tiggerlover91, It is always sad when something you have your heart set on can't happen just when you think it is in your reach. PD to you and your DH. Might I suggest getting a new wedding band for him. You can have it engraved "15 Years and Stronger each day" or" I am my beloved, My Beloved id mine" (It is really pretty in hebrew). You can give it to him at Dinner on your anniversary and tell him that It is important for him to know how much he means to you. This is a Private vow renewal... From You to Him.

Some time a guy will miss the sentiment, but you can try...

 

[lookingforward]

I hope that you enjoy every moment at Stone Mountain. Having been married for 16 years I can totally understand your dissapointment about the vow renewel... but with the love you share with your husband and the hope for the future you WILL have a lovely ceremony one day. Living in a good marriage is such a wonderful thing. Happy Anniversary!

 

[Tiggerlover91]

Awwww...thanks you guys! The words of encouragement have helped a lot! Disneyrsh....I will have to check out that spot in Stone Mountain. We plan to spend a couple of days there.

I appreciate all the kind words and pixie dust!

Blessings,

Denise